Smiling uncontrollably?

lachlensland · 2019-12-11T00:38:33+00:00

Yep. For me, its laughing at comments that men make that make me incredibly uncomfortable (especially gross jokes or sexist comments). My women colleagues and I were just talking about this the other day when our boss made a sexist joke and most of us politely laughed even though we were fuming. We were taught from an early age to look and be pleasant when you're actually scared/upset/offended because it keeps you safe in unpredictable situations. And in a work context, it prevents us from being seen as "that crazy feminist who can't take a joke," which could impact our career progression.

__kamikaze__ · 2019-12-11T01:24:41+00:00

Try throwing your shoulders back— seriously. The pose alone promotes confidence.

Otherwise if you can’t help but smile throw in an additional facial expression like rolling your eyes or raising an eyebrow. That would convey your disapproval while the smile softens the blow

Pink_Pollyanna · 2019-12-10T23:44:29+00:00

Wow. All these years I thought I was the only one who does this! I’ve been this way my whole life. It was so annoying in grade school because everyone always pointed it out.

Focus on relaxing the muscles on your face around your mouth. I do deep breathing exercises through my nose only. Try practicing in the mirror to relax your face as you talk, then once you feel comfortable, try doing it with someone present, like a friend. If you need to stop your uncontrollable smile right away, furrow your brows. It’s hard to smile while doing that. Hope this helps! It just takes practice and patience.

grimreapersdtr · 2019-12-11T17:52:46+00:00

I think smiling is known to be a common response to fear among professionals in psych. No wonder we women are scolded from childhood to keep doing it “or else”. We “need” to constantly display our fear and inferiority to others in order to gain approval.
Of course, people smile for other reasons, but the “fear” smile (to me) is directly related to anxiety.
I hate hate hate it when I smile and laugh at rude or disrespectful comments, and I do it all the time. It’s as if that “flight/freeze” reflex goes into overdrive for me during confrontation, and I rarely tap into my anger with a good comeback unless I’ve been seething for quite a while, or am expecting a put down from someone else. My brain shuts off and the part of my mind that can develop words with which to defend myself goes blank.

meecy166 · 2019-12-11T04:36:58+00:00

Thank you oh my god I feel like a freak of nature cause I’m always smiling, people literally walk up to me and ask me why I’m smiling all the time and anytime my friend takes a video I see myself just smiling for no reason like a freaking freak

Kompottkopf · 2019-12-11T12:46:03+00:00

I do this too. (And I really hate that i can't control it!)

I found out recently that smiling is actually a way to cope with stress. Do you know these "if you're angry, smile for 40 seconds" or "before you call someone, smile for a few seconds" hacks? That's because the brain sends out endorphins when you smile, even if you don't feel happy on the inside, to actually make you feel happy.

But smiling can also be a stress response, as when you are feeling emotions on the inside that are almost too much to bear. Brain + Face going into smiley-mode, so the emotional response with the endorphins get's triggered and you actually feel better.

I guess we can only overcome this with practice, even if that's rather terrifiying in the beginneng ^^°

Title	Smiling uncontrollably?
Author	17430
Upvotes	29
Comments	11
Date	December 10, 2019 11:30 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/e8yor3/smiling_uncontrollably/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/smiling-uncontrollably.687134 https://theredarchive.com/post/687134

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