When you miss them, read this.

betty_lou · 2020-11-08T19:30:12+00:00

Yup. DBT taught me to do pros and cons lists on problematic behaviours in myself but tbh using it for exes I’m hung up on works really well. The key is not getting persuaded by which list is longer, rather which items are more important. For example, having a long list of pros is trumped by a short list of cons that includes “gaslighting”.

darkempress2003 · 2020-11-08T22:41:34+00:00

Maybe it's not really them we miss, it's who we were wanting them to be.

FDSxMuffinVSrat · 2020-11-08T20:53:04+00:00

Aw that makes me feel less bad for thinking of my ex sometimes. Yes I miss him, but don't forget.

_xyoungbellax_ · 2020-11-09T02:16:31+00:00

I cried last night listening to Everglow but not because I missed them but that they didn't turn out to be who they showed they were in the first month. I was disappointed and upset about that as hell. So, I was actually missing the lost time. I was legit screaming "Why did you have to turn out to be a narcissist and sociopath?" "Why couldn't you love me normally?" "Was the emotional abuse really necessary?" Oof. That was one hell of a ride.

screamthekidd · 2020-11-08T19:20:53+00:00

Love this

ThanksGosling · 2020-11-09T04:55:58+00:00

He broke up with me out of nowhere (even though I always put up with his criticism, anxiety and depression and bent over backwards for him) after meeting his extended family and friends overseas coz he 'realised he didn't want kids after all or to settle down' after living together for 8 months. I always forget that LVM move and focus on the stuff I miss.

Educational_Okra_798 · 2020-11-08T22:37:37+00:00

I needed this reminder

CrazyPaine · 2020-11-09T21:12:13+00:00

I definitely need this reminder. Yeah we had good times together but that doesn't explain all the bad shit that he's done to me. So much fucking abusive shit from sexual, emotional, mental, financial, and even physical. I couldn't do it no longer. He actually helped me out by putting my shit out, giving away my girl dog while my uncle passed away and just do more other things to finally push our relationship off the cliff. I was tired of it, sick of it.

Title	When you miss them, read this.
Author	Ok_Ad_67
Upvotes	1198
Comments	18
Date	November 8, 2020 6:46 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jqh0go/when_you_miss_them_read_this/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/when-you-miss-them-read-this.324676 https://theredarchive.com/post/324676

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