A small, but important change

dandar4600 · 2015-06-30T11:25:34+00:00

I know to do that, but sometimes I forget myself. Oftentimes I don't really care and my first answer is whatever, what do you feel like? Then I remember that she just wants me to make the decision and I will go ahead and make one. Fake it until you make it. Right? Eventually it will be second nature to JUST MAKE THE FUCKING DECISION.

bogeyd6 · 2015-06-30T12:51:09+00:00

Shooter! Great to hear from you! You wanna go to the Sizzler and get some grub?

While every man has the right to be his sole judge, I have to smirk a bit about liking sizzler. On a serious note you are headed in the right direction. I advise to hold frame for when she says no, and then you need to just go anyways without her. Not as usual part of discussion, but when you are being compliance/shit tested. Of course she loves you to lead her. That what she really needs even if she says its not what she wants. You may not have to plan everything, but she is fully expecting it.

hamsterbaiting · 2015-06-30T16:03:25+00:00

Here's a thought. Keep a running list of regular and new places to check out. Same with movies.

Then you can just review it and choose, avoiding the whole deciding/brainstorming awkwardness. Rotate in the new ones to avoid predictability. Combine leading with variety/new experiences and it should be a great night.

You can even give the illusion of choice. "We're either going here or here. Let me know if you have a preference."

CzechBook · 2015-06-30T11:59:35+00:00

I had an interesting realization about this. I used to think that, regarding a lot of choices, I didn't care so I might as well ask my wife.

But then I realized I was lying to myself. I almost always have a slight preference or opinion. Yet somehow it would seem "selfish" to me if I opted for the choice that I slightly preferred. "What if she prefers choice B more than I prefer choice A? Wouldn't that be unfair and terrible of me then?!!! OH NO." I am working on always stating my preference now. She's welcome to present her preference and I'll happily consider the merits of what she has to say.

It's really fucked up that I have to work on that. Shows how accustomed I became over the years to being a subservient doormat. ("And why isn't she turned on since I just did what she wanted?", Beta me would have no doubt asked). Fuck.

fasterpussycatdie · 2015-06-30T13:31:01+00:00

Last week I told the wife that we're going out on a date night. I had planned to go to a free outdoor music concert with a fireworks show at the end of the evening. I didn't tell her where we were going or what was going on.

We went, we laughed, we danced, we had a great time. She didn't let on, but she really dug the fact that I kept it mysterious and fun leading up to the evening. She is still mentioning how much fun she had, all for the cost of nothing.

Women love a mystery.

BluepillProfessor · 2015-06-30T15:44:10+00:00

This is one of the most frustrating things about womminz. They are pushy and demanding. They DEMAND something be done or a particular restaurant and then they start to second guess themselves and ultimately get pissed at you for letting them make that choice.

Then when you ignore them and drive to the place you want, they relax and are suddenly happy because the burden of deciding is lifted from them.

Rabbit hole? No shit!

Title	A small, but important change
Author	angels_fan
Upvotes	23
Comments	14
Date	June 30, 2015 5:48 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3blnsf/a_small_but_important_change/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/a-small-but-important-change.201590 https://theredarchive.com/post/201590

Comments