Question about NMMNG

FearDearg2015 · 2015-10-07T08:52:28+00:00

STFU is the most reasonable, fool proof advice we can give. Until you know how to modulate and control yourself, it's better to say nothing. Yes, there is more to it, and obviously if you turn into a complete fucking mute you are gonna find things don't work out so well, but it's mainly a psychological cue. On the road to unplugging, you need some simple, fool proof advice that has been proven to work, is easy to remember, easy to implement, and at worst, cannot harm your situation any further.

"lift" and "read the sidebar" are the same kind of advice. It's not like those things are some magic bullet that fixes your shit, but they are easy to follow, and have been proven to work. If nothing else, it preps you for the next stages of unplugging.

Lift, STFU and read the sidebar. See, it's so easy to kick start that process. No elaboration needed.

feminazis_stalk_me · 2015-10-07T09:55:51+00:00

Yea no. NMMNG encourages you to speak up and get what you want, instead of putting others first and hoping / waiting to catch a break. Should you broadcast every mood, feeling, desire and thought? No. That's what women do. NMMNG helps you identify what you want and re-prioritize the way you handle your shit in a way that benefits you.

Don't share your innermost thoughts with women. Don't show weakness and for fucks sake, don't reveal the magic to them, or else it isn't magic anymore. Bitches love magic. Magic makes panties disappear. Work your fucking magic.

strategos_autokrator · 2015-10-07T12:56:35+00:00

There is a difference between being honest about what you want and how you will get it, and bitching like a little kid that wants mommy to fix things. One is alpha, the other is omega.

At the beginning, is all too tempting to just victim puke over her. Don't. STFU. Read more. Act, don't talk.

THe best way to communicate this stuff is by acting in a congruent manly way, not by acting like a women talking about her feelings to get pity.

UEMcGill · 2015-10-07T13:54:19+00:00

There's a whole NMMNG community and board, and to a man they all agree, DO NOT TELL YOUR WIFE ABOUT THE BOOK. Generally this is where they feel Doc Glover got it wrong.

Now, that's not to say you should be deceitful about it, it's just that it's your journey and you need to own it. If she notices a change (She should) it's easy enough, tell her "Hey, making myself better babe. "

Canttakethewhyfromme · 2015-10-07T17:09:54+00:00

STFU and go lift

thisisme0007 · 2015-10-07T09:51:12+00:00

I asked a similar question at first. STFU worked great for me

bogeyd6 · 2015-10-07T12:39:52+00:00

So do STFU or do I work thru NMMNG with her?

STFU and dont even let her know the book exists. All of your improvements are to be transparent. The authenticity is gone when she knows you are trying. I went through some serious james bond shit to get paper copies of the book delivered to me through a friends account. Complete with dead drops.

Interesting take on NMMNG. I did not really identify with the scenarios in the book and at the end I decided to try the techniques anyways. Especially setting boundaries. I had been a mindset for too long of "she does what she wants anyways, im done fighting it" but turns out she likes when I fight it. Something about a man fighting and dying on his hill that makes her want him. The other gem that I really took from it is to stop helping/doing for others. While technically it is my job, that doesn't mean I get to do the work for them.

itsgavinc · 2015-10-07T17:47:05+00:00

Covert contracts was where it was for me. I had no idea. Just changing that one principle in my life has improved my life ten-fold. If I don't expect anything covertly, then I cannot be disappointed when I receive nothing.

Sadbeary · 2015-10-08T00:51:13+00:00

You are allowed to talk with your wife, STFU to me means do not engage with insanity.

There is a risk, my wife commented a few days ago "I told you that and you didn't say anything so I thought you agreed." I said "You were being ridiculous, I was quiet because I chose not to engage with such insanity; I did not agree" I said that without thinking and thought here comes the fight...but, she just looked at me curiously for a few seconds and she continued on merrily for the rest of the day.

BluepillProfessor · 2015-10-08T14:32:41+00:00

Great Question!

NMMNG contains the very hotly disputed advice that you can talk to your SO about your changes. It even encourages you to have your SO read the book.

IF you are a woman reading NMMNG who is trying to get rid of her covert contracts I think it is reasonable to clue in your husband.

IF you are a man, the consensus is that the advice to "talk" to your wife is usually just stupid.

That said, I told my wife about NMMNG. She even read the book. So, I advocate a modified rule:

IF your wife is receptive AND
You ONLY talk about covert contracts and 'nice guy syndrome' AND
You are taking significant action on your MAP AND
You are realizing significant improvement to the point your wife and others are noticing AND
Your wife is unusually logical (for a woman) AND
Your wife is openly supporting the notion of you 'manning up'

THEN

I think you can talk to her about NMMNG as the book suggests. If you don't have all the above going in your direction, your best bet is to STFU. Men DO. Women TALK. Acta Non Verba.

Sepean · 2015-10-07T08:45:22+00:00

STFU.

Instead of relying on a book's authority to pave the way for you, alpha up. You want your alphaness to be as authentic as possible, and "I read it in a book" is the opposite of that. It's like charity, it loses some of its magic if people know you're not genuine about it.

As to sharing feelings, there are feelings that are appropriate to share (I feel like a sandwich or I want a blowjob) and feelings that are not (I'm hurt when you reject me or I'm planning to fix our marriage).

TL;DR: STFU.

Now MRP seems to be very pro towards STFU and don't speak to your wife/SO and I've tried to apply that in varying degrees of success.

STFU alone isn't enough. It won't give you many plus points, but it lets you avoid racking up all the minus points men get for talking too much. You need solid SMV to make stuff really work.

Also bear in mind that MRP is not something that lets every interaction work smoothly. Especially in the early days, often your options to a shit test will be a) comply and you'll get peace now and a rejection tonight or b) A&A and she'll stomp out but fuck you passionately later.

Take the long view. Don't listen to what she says, look at what she does.

Title	Question about NMMNG
Author	Drknative
Upvotes	4
Comments	28
Date	October 7, 2015 8:11 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3ntek7/question_about_nmmng/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/question-about-nmmng.200907 https://theredarchive.com/post/200907

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