Double Standard?

InnerSwineHound · 2026-04-01T11:38:02+00:00

Women are the first ones to put other women down

MisterBowTies · 2026-04-01T12:32:34+00:00

Another woman pretending she's an authority on all men.

rdeincognito · 2026-04-01T12:11:25+00:00

Why no one is asking that woman which standards does she have for men? Because she must be truly heinous for no man to actually approach her, or she's just a normal girl whose standard is "top 5% man or I don't wanna"

TenuousOgre · 2026-04-01T16:25:51+00:00

I don’t know about other men but I have been very discriminatory with sexual partners, had to make sense objectively and have feelings. Always love the assumption that men somehow don’t have feelings or don’t pay any attention to them. Why is it so difficult to understand that controlling emotions and guarding the public expression of them is different from not having them or not paying attention to them when appropriate?

binsomniac · 2026-04-01T12:43:45+00:00

What the hell! So men "don't have feelings" or need to fulfill a deeper ( romantic connection ) with a partner? For them we are beneath any basic human dignity or rights or dreams. All that "stuff" like feelings and developing relationships is just "reserved" for women. And they still wonder why anyone near this woman, doesn't want to get involved with her...let her go to another female therapist, to charge her thousands of dollars, to tell her that she's a"victim" of a men's system ( patriarchy ) we're supposed to bring something ( qualities, resources etc ) or a personality to make her attractive or worth pursuing in a relationship, how "unfair" to live in a society were you must work hard and put effort to achieve your goals or dreams...🤷‍♂️ It's easier to blame others... including the half of the world population. Of your own lack of action. Instead of encouragement, give her another dose of "victimization".

New-Distribution6033 · 2026-04-01T13:41:56+00:00

Just auction the V card on ebay. Even if she's not conventionally attractive, there's a fetish for it. And she'd make some money.

RyuujinPl · 2026-04-02T00:27:49+00:00

I would rather suspect the responders stance against hiring an escort stems from the perception of inherit value in virginity.

And, to be fair, it is fair. Society does have double standards regarding genders but good advice takes them in consideration - even if responder itself does not share them.

Like I would advice men against crying in front of people because of negative social consequences it brings. But for sure I am against judging men crying.. and when facing such individuals I do have full empathy and defend them..

Dembara · 2026-04-01T15:43:54+00:00

To be honest, this doesn't seem too bad. I would read "might be a solution" as "I don't know that experience; it could be more probable they would have a better experience" not as "it would be okay for a man." I think there would be better ways to put it (e.g. "from my experience and the women I know, it greatly helps to have feelings for one's partner to have a satisfactory experience") but I wouldn't read it as a per say condemnation of men, just less of an expectation of the role of connections due to a lack of experience.

SidewaysGiraffe · 2026-04-01T14:53:34+00:00

Um... do you not understand how newspapers work? They don't have "mods".

Local-Willingness784 · 2026-04-01T16:43:35+00:00

isnt this also putting this woman down? like she has to take theraphy when there are mundane reasons to be in her situation and its not mental illness or stuff like that?

mrmensplights · 2026-04-02T00:47:39+00:00

This answer is just sad all around.

First the casual and pointless snipe at men. The classic stereotyping of men as base, animalistic, devoid of emotions. Fight and fuck. Then the usual women are wonderful idealized view of women.

There are many many women who enjoy casual sex. There's entire cultures around one night stands after clubbing or whatever. Many men enjoy casual sex also. There are also many men and women who prefer an emotional dimension to sex.

Abby wasn't very helpful today.

entingmat2 · 2026-04-02T00:29:54+00:00

Of course Dear Abby got it wrong

MoeTayZer · 2026-04-02T12:50:12+00:00

Just keep being a beautiful virgin women and live "a virgin life", it's a beautiful life, a clean life, a calm life and a special life that makes you feel satisfied of yourself forever...

Alert_Term_8144 · 2026-04-01T16:20:21+00:00

While there are double standards, my opinion is this isn't a double standard - men and women ARE different even though some people nowadays claim we're exactly the same in mind and thought. From my experience, more men can compartmentalize sex from feelings depending on their intentions, and just want the release. Female prostitutes can separate sex from feelings because they go into the mentality of doing a job. But usually for women part of sex is feeling desired and you don't feel desired if you're paying for it. I realize men want to feel desired as well, but it's no secret that men are the majority of customers for escorts, onlyfans. While I don't think the first time needs to be first love, I also wouldn't want my first experience to be remembered as one where I paid for it.

NewsSad5006 · 2026-04-01T17:39:48+00:00

I’m usually very militant about double standards—and there is definitely one here. However, in Abby’s defense, one of the things my wife and I have learned over the years is that sex is often motivated by different things based on your gender.

Women often feel ready for sex because of a connection that has already developed and sexual relations are often the next logical step.

For men, we often use sex to create that connection.

That’s the frequent disconnect between many men and women.

Now, this is a broad generalization, but applies much of the time. I wonder if that was what was behind Abby’s comment?

wabe_walker · 2026-04-01T16:35:42+00:00

Holy moly, maybe this post is April Fools. Are we really having to scrape the bottom of the barrel to resort to a reaching critique of [to be sarcastic for a spell] trendy and zeitgeist-leading 21st-century cultural tastemaker, Dear Abby?

From only the context above—and I mean that; try and step outside the uncharitable strawman picture you're constructing and read the literal words and not what your overactive hypervigilance is framing it as—do you really think that if a male virgin were writing in, that the “Abby” here would wholeheartedly recommend the escort without mentioning the possible ramifications, practical and emotional? Do you think that there would be implication that the male virgin has no feelings or no need for emotional connection with a lover? Did you read the word “might” in there, misread it as “is often” or “is always” and then flip your jimmies?

The sexes do have different by-and-large commonalities in how they engage in sex and then psychologically process it afterwards. Ask any male that has had their share of female casual FWBs and they will tell you that the female is often the one to “catch feelings” first. There is a “typical” (meaning common but not absolute) detachment and compartmentalization that males tend to be able to manifest in sexual encounters that is nowhere near as common in females. It's ok to acknowledge this, and yet, this is not black and white. We mustn't apply some broad and common trait of a demographic to each and every individual as an absolute. We don't have to look at everything through some engrieved polarized lens, and jump at the shadowy monster in the room when it's really just a coat hanging on the hook when the lights are on. Turn your lights on.

skcuf2 · 2026-04-01T18:04:53+00:00

Makes sense to me, honestly. Women have evolved to pair bond with their mate for security and protection. Men don't have the same proclivity here since we can mate with many women at one time.

MeasurementNice295 · 2026-04-01T23:19:05+00:00

Inceldom wouldn't be such a huge crisis in the modern world if the solution was as simple as "just hire an escort" for men, either.

There's so much more to it than that, and yet society keeps actively choosing to treat men as if they're as good as puppies in heat who just need a woman to get them off to have their sexual frustration fixed for life, any woman.

Because that's all there is to their sexual dimension, isn't it?

In the rarest occasions they cross the boundary of hostility and mocking, that is, but that's all they ever have beyond that: dismissal.

Fucking disgusting.

Title	Double Standard?
Author	Bill4133
Upvotes	270
Comments	32
Date	April 1, 2026 11:30 AM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1s9hvsb/double_standard/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/double-standard.1576896 https://theredarchive.com/post/1576896

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