Would you do it again?

/u/Xoramung, called to be an p/t Evangelist/Prophet of Christ Jesus by the will of God.... ok this is not an Epistle or Letter to the Church. (but to r/RPChristians lol)

Would you do it again? Would you who currently are, who are getting, or have been married, do it all over again? Would you wait, do it sooner, pick another partner, not do it? change something?

GENESIS

Growing up I saw semi-traditional marriages, where basically the Men were in charge, and the Women followed. Of course, growing up, I also saw the changing times, saw Women start to lead and Men follow, divorce rates rise up, the change in society from Marriage to just cohabitation, kids outside of marriage, parents getting divorced, all which have undoubtedly changed my view on marriage, getting married and actually many other areas not directly related.

When i was 18, i wanted to marry a virgin women, never kissed another male, non smoker, non drug user, no tattoos, no previous relationships, Christian, young, fit, thin, non gambler, non drinker (the list went on i cannot even remember some of the other stuff). I remember talking about these things to a boss of mine, and all he said was "You're telling me that if she (some random customer) was naked and and wanted to have sex with you, you would say no?"

That question got me thinking, because i remember thinking i would say yes, but it dawned on me then, that perhaps my list was unreasonable, basically a way to reject anyone due to what i had witnessed growing up. (which took a few years to get throw away)

EXODUS

Now obviously i had skewed data growing up, but what has not helped is all the other stuff i have seen walking in the faith. Pastors divorced and remarried, Christians divorcing, Christians getting pregnant by other, as i call it "talk it up Christians" (basically will preach about self control and love but have none them selves), Christians cheating on their partners, Christians being led by the Lord to their partner for Life, and then that exact person, leaving them because the ministry got in the way.

I kid you not, that last point has got to be the scariest thing I have ever heard (from the person involved) regarding marriage i have heard, and has literally stopped me from totally pursing a wife (i still sort of am), i mean, if the Lord leads you to a women, and she leaves 10-20 yrs later, what chance have i really got?

And i am only talking about Christians, forget about how messed up the world is. Ive been offered twice $50k to get married to women for citizen ship. (i was disgusted and said no, marriage is sacred) I won't even mention hypergamy. Ok i will, now that i am aware of what it is and how it works (basics) i can defend myself from that much more easily. Essentially being equipped. I see hypergamy everywhere now, i fear its made things worse overall, but i love the truth, and truth often makes you see the ugliness and at least you can start to work towards a better way

LEVITICUS

I realise in a way, that being single for 37 years (because some beta behaviour and overweight), seems hard (but not as hard as the constant questioning by family of "Why are you not married" spam), but it also comes as a blessing in disguise, no children, no divorce, and must be easier than all the divorce and marriage problems people post about (read here ,actually i feel some of you could help this guy out, very messy stuff going on) and even this, (sorry i am just making a point, not condemning the posts).

NUMBERS

What i am able to attract without any issue is the 50+ women who smoke, dont take care of them selves, lonely single mothers, divorces, the older women and 3rd worlders who want a green card via marrying me. No joke some of these people make it clear they want a "Caucasian partner" (jokes on you baby). Yes i am working on getting muscles and stronger and working it all out (for health and yes to because it attracts women).

Lets face it, i was told in Church by a female to "dress better to get a girlfriend" which makes you really see that hypergamy is really real. I rate my SMV at about 2-3 i guess, RMV i have no idea. No i am not a man of high value to women, but i know God sees me much much higher.

DEUTERONOMY

Besides the possibility of sex (which seems not guaranteed at all or even going to be any good with miserable hags by your bed side) and having your own genetic children (which could always end up not even being yours!), should i try to get married? For whatever reason, i still somewhat desire a partner, and i think a part part of that is social conditioning. I am not actually sure if i really need one. I have been thru enough to realize the key thing:

Jesus is all i need, he is by my side, and sent his Holy Spirit into me to work with me to do things prepared ahead of time.

would you guys do it again? would you recommend or not recommend marriage for myself? what would you ask or say to me? what advice can you give?I need to figure it out sooner than later. The key thing for me is getting sex without sin (aka getting married), i can do without all the rest, but it unfortunately comes in a package.

I hope my ramblings make sense.

edit: sex without sin aka getting married, i mean, help me see what i am not seeing.