Cold feet or red flags?

Boyfriend and I are considering marriage (1.5 years LTR).

How do you know if it's cold feet or red flags?

My concerns: I've never lived with a man before and I'm afraid.

I will take a serious paycut if we marry because he's moving for a job but he'll provide for me.

I'm afraid we'll get stagnant (even though we haven't so far).

I worry about money because I'm taking a paycut.

I'm afraid I'll grow old and ugly and he'll fall out of love with me.

Sometimes we fight over things (like I said I would cook dinner today, was at the store in the afternoon and he texts me saying he needs to run errands so can I eat dinner with a friend, then I got annoyed and said it's 3pm we have plenty of time for dinner).

When he's stressed he ignores me and bums cigarettes from his friends. He doesn't buy cigarettes but it's his vice when he's stressed (as opposed to overeating or getting angry at me or being an alcoholic).

Sometimes he wants to hang out with his guy friends after work whereas for me I'm always waiting for him to come home.

Sometimes when he's stressed at work he comes home and complains at me and then I get worried that his job isn't going well.

I'm afraid because this is the first time I will have to accept someone as head of our household/marriage and up until now I've done everything myself.

Edit: just to say otherwise we have a pretty good relationship, we get along well. And I acknowledge that there are no perfect marriages or perfect partners.