Does your first ever leave your mind?

Bakerofpie · 2014-01-17T21:33:02+00:00

Women don't have a universal loss of virginity story so this is silly. I never gave mine another thought

meowfacenator · 2014-01-17T23:31:10+00:00

my first was my husband so it was special to me

darkcannoli · 2014-01-17T21:40:56+00:00

Still a virgin!

sugarcrush · 2014-01-17T22:26:57+00:00

He has no place in my heart and I only think of him as often as any other past acquaintance (hey I wonder what the girl who sat behind me in math class is up to these days...?)

2014-01-17T22:22:38+00:00

[permanently deleted]

FleetingWish · 2014-01-17T22:02:58+00:00

My first doesn't really hold any place in my heart.

Bakerofpie · 2014-01-17T21:31:26+00:00

I honestly could care less about my first. We were together around six months and he was off my mind almost immediately after breaking up. From what I hear that isn't the norm, but I've never really asked anyone about it.

Edit to address second part of question: as far as how my bonding with my husband makes me view my first time now, I never even thought to compare the two until reading this. It just makes my first time seem gross and unsatisfying. Now that I'm with my husband and think about other people I've slept with my reaction is usually just pretty neutral. I'm not horrified or ashamed, but I'm glad those relationships are over and happy to be in a marriage where we can be very open and intimate about sex in a way I never could before. I had really never thought about this much. I look forward to reading some other answers.

2014-01-18T01:01:39+00:00

My first has no place in my heart anymore. At first, I was really clingy and totally "in love" with him...until we broke up two months later, and I realized I'd been used.

I stayed in touch with him and was still emotionally attached until I met my SO, who quickly struck down any feelings for another guy I may have had. I blocked that ex and haven't talked to him since. Meanwhile, my darling's almost completely replaced the memories of that night, even though it was only a little over a year ago.

So to answer question, yes.

TempestTcup · 2014-01-18T02:47:22+00:00

Mine was with my first boyfriend after we had dated a year. We were very young and he was a total momma's boy. A really cute momma's boy! But no, not pining for him now or anything.

My husband is the most natural alpha I've been with, so every other boyfriend pales in comparison.

2014-01-18T11:43:44+00:00

It's honestly not as big as a deal as people make it. The person I lost it to I was dating right before my fiancé now.

The sex was so bad i was just glad it was over tbh. He was very small and it didn't feel to different compared to.... Solo work.

When I had sex for the first time with my fiancé I bled and it hurt. But it felt good. So I think the whole hymen breaking situation happened only with my current partner.

In the end it's not a big deal. Religion, the media, parents and peers make it a huge thing.

PhantomDream09 · 2014-01-18T19:23:17+00:00

Your "First" is only memorable and significant if you are still with him, or if you are currently unhappy with your present circumstances in my opinion. Otherwise, your life should be better now than it was back then. Every relationship I've had has been better than the previous one. I don't have any regrets about it or the relationship, my current SO just diminishes everything about my past relationships.

:0)

sierrasecho · 2014-01-18T00:44:57+00:00

Another vote for not thinking about him much at all, though he was very dear to me, and we had an amazing relationship for high school. He was patient, and gentle and our relationship continued for another 6 months after, when he had to move due to familial issues. However, I am far more intimately connected to my SO now than I ever was to my first.

NataliyaKochergova · 2014-01-18T14:09:23+00:00

My first is my bf, so I doubt I'll ever get rid of his memory.

But many of my friends lost their virginity because of peer pressure. They were starting to get teased because they were still a virgin at some "advanced" age like 18, and lost their virginity to some guys they didn't have feelings for. After virginity loss, it was a point of honor to dump the guy before he dumps you. Or else he might start acting uppity ("now, just don't get clingy on me just because I'm your first"). From what I know, it looks like they didn't much care about their first. He was just a guy who happened to be convenient.

darkcannoli · 2014-01-18T01:09:38+00:00

Wonder how it is for men?

2014-01-18T01:28:44+00:00

I was good friends with the person who took my virginity, it wasn't special, it was what it was. I think fairytales and chick flicks put all this pressure on women especially to make it magical and special, when usually its a bit messy, a bit painful and embarrassing, so i suggest you forget about it and remember the amazing sex with the one you love...not the crappy messy mistake that losing your virginity usually is.

kekerae · 2014-01-18T04:58:38+00:00

My first was a boyfriend I started dating towards the end on high school and continued to date for 4 years. We waited about 2 years to have sex so it wasn't a decision we made lightly and my next partner after him was my husband.

I knew him well, we still bump into each other and have lots of mutual friends so I'd say he's on my mind from time to time but I don't still have feelings for him. I just have good memories because we did a lot of growing up together through the ages of 17-20.

Title	Does your first ever leave your mind?
Author	TheRedPrivilege
Upvotes	6
Comments	36
Date	January 17, 2014 9:24 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1vh64e/does_your_first_ever_leave_your_mind/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/does-your-first-ever-leave-your-mind.84165 https://theredarchive.com/post/84165

Comments