How do I get over this decision?

homo_homini_lupus · 2014-10-23T13:24:14+00:00

It's a fucking dog. Get over it

2014-10-23T02:52:05+00:00

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HappyWifeLife · 2014-10-23T05:47:30+00:00

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Camille11325 · 2014-10-23T02:30:31+00:00

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2014-10-23T02:53:59+00:00

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TheTerrorSquad · 2014-10-23T08:14:17+00:00

You are not getting the correct advice on this thread

2014-10-23T03:24:13+00:00

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Bakerofpie · 2014-10-23T14:39:01+00:00

A lot of people are making this about the dog instead of answering your actual question. I know I could not just "get over it" because I LOVE animals and wouldn't have reached the commitment stage with someone who wouldn't keep pets. But the fact that you tried to talk him out of getting a dog clearly displays that animals are not as important to you as they are to many of the previous commenters basically encouraging you to leave your fiancé.

There are plenty of people who have already brought up that this is a red flag as far as his decision making skills go, so while I agree that it's concerning I am going to go forward with the assumption that an impulsive decision like this is out of character for him and not indicative of a larger problem and actually try to address your question. It can be hard when our captains make decisions that are hurtful to us, but it is going to happen from time to time. What makes us happy is not always what's really best for us and our captains have to make the tough calls sometimes.

Frankly it sounds like your emotions surrounding this situation are clouding the way you have portrayed things. This description alone makes your fiancé sound quite callous, but if you are already engaged to him I doubt that is truly the case. You have to remember that everyone makes mistakes. He had the best of intentions in getting a dog, but he bit off more than he could chew. He is giving the dog to his uncle who I am sure he knows well and trusts; he isn't just dumping the dog on the side of the road or giving it to the pound to be euthanized. Emotionally I think it will feel good to go and visit the dog and see the great new life he is living, and your fiancé has made sure that can happen for you. Just keep reminding yourself that he made a very human error but is now trying to rectify it the best way he knows how. There is surely a reason he gave the dog to a family member rather than the pound.

FleetingWish · 2014-10-23T03:14:47+00:00

I may be biased, but I can at least offer a biased perspective from the other side. I strongly dislike dogs. That being said, it's hard for me to understand the concept of someone having to choose between their love of their life, and their pet, and choosing their pet. I mean, if this was a new relationship maybe I could understand, but this is your fiancee. You are talking about getting rid of someone who actually has the capacity to love and care for you, someone who wants to choose to be with you for the rest of your life, so that you can keep your dog? I just don't get it at all. A dog has no capacity for caring about you, nor is it able to determine whether it wants to be with you or someone else. Maybe that's why they call it man's best friend, it will never choose someone else over you... because it doesn't have the capacity to do so.

Let me get all this straight. The dog has been around for a shorter time period than him. He bought it as a gift for you, even though he hates dogs, because he wanted to try because he knew it would make you happy. And you still are considering choosing the dog? Dogs are a dime-a-dozen, they are all pretty much the same, you may never find someone like you SO.

Or maybe it's for the best. Maybe you shouldn't stay with him after all, I mean if you're considering leaving him, and breaking your promise to him, for your dog, maybe it's best you don't marry him. Women who break their promises aren't really good marriage material, and you don't seem to care about him that much anyway.

TheTerrorSquad · 2014-10-23T05:19:22+00:00

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SuperSlavisWife · 2014-10-23T08:51:28+00:00

Sometimes there are hiccoughs. Generally there will be things you agree and disagree about, this just happened to be a big one that caught you by surprise. Look at the big picture. How much do pets matter to your future? Is there any way you could have the enjoyment of being around a dog without having to own one yourself? Is this just one isolated problem, or have you had similar thoughts about other problems lately?

If it's just this one thing, I'm sure you can find a workaround. My angle is that if knowing this about him didn't change your desire to get engaged, it shouldn't really change it now you've seen his dislike for animals in action. Some women here are saying they wouldn't date a man who disliked animals, but if he were such an awful match for you, you wouldn't be wearing that ring to begin with.

PS: You could always consider adopting a smaller, older dog. An animal that is quieter, needs less exercise, eats less food and is largely trained may be a compromise he's happy to make.

SoftHarem · 2014-10-23T03:10:42+00:00

Husband > Dog > Most people.

Get your head on straight, lady.

StingrayVC · 2014-10-23T02:11:15+00:00

Do I give that up for the rest of my life, for him?

Yes. You're sad right now and you're not thinking straight. You have pledged the rest of your life to a man and are now worried that it might be wrong, because of a dog. Look, I love dogs too and have one by my side right now. I love him dearly and I would give him up in a second for my husband.

This is the man who went out and got an animal whom he knows he would not like to help you get through a very difficult time. He's obviously good at making decisions that are out of reverence for you. Now, as your fiancé, it is his job to make decisions out of responsibility for your family, and you need to respect that.

I understand this is very hard and I am sorry for you, but this truly is best for your dog and your family. You need to respect the man who you will soon be calling husband.

FleetingWish · 2014-10-23T01:42:23+00:00

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drlothariothuggut · 2014-10-23T07:44:16+00:00

It's a freakin dog!!! I personally don't like animals. Get rid of it. They're messy and expense.

2014-10-23T02:51:44+00:00

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through_a_ways · 2014-10-23T05:29:04+00:00

I'd be fine with dogs (kind of want one actually, but would hate taking care of it), but fuck cats. They suck, plus, toxoplasmosis.

Title	How do I get over this decision?
Author	WilIjR
Upvotes	2
Comments	45
Date	October 23, 2014 1:22 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/2k1xor/how_do_i_get_over_this_decision/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-i-get-over-this-decision.165841 https://theredarchive.com/post/165841

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