Losing my virginity

riceweight · 2022-07-07T03:37:46+00:00

22F, only very recently lost my virginity to my bf who I’ve been dating for almost a year.

I feel you. I have been horny for many years. And the advice I got at the time was “masturbate or otherwise get rid of the horniness”. It sounds trite and dismissive but this is the way to go. I’m very happy my major sexual experiences were with this current man.

Get a reasonably sized dildo (not too large), read some smut, and release the horny. I also second another commenter who said to unsubscribe to the horny. Don’t consume media of hot girls flaunting their stuff, of hot guys and actors etc.

Direct your mind to good and useful activities. Dystopic sci fi novels, your university schoolwork, socialization with friends, singing, art, etc. Fill up your schedule and your time so you simply don’t have the energy to be horny.

raven_lou_chicken · 2022-07-07T00:41:19+00:00

It's hard to know who will be the right person but I would say to not sleep with anyone you aren't at least engaged to. I know it's hard. I've been there. I'm 22 and regret sleeping with anyone before my husband. My body count is still super low but It troubles me. Be mindful about who you allow to be that close to you. Make it known what type of girl you are. Sex is a big deal no matter how much the world tries to make it seem like it's not.

Strixt · 2022-07-07T03:25:03+00:00

Starting to think about, crave, want sex before you even have a relationship that leads to marriage is a sure fire way to end up like those Tik Tok girls with deadbeat boyfriends.

I get the urges, you can do things to avoid urges. Take down all photos of hotness. Unsubscribe to all hotness. And keep your mind stimulated hobbies that will build you. Don’t read romance novels!

If you like hard core redpill advice. Nothing is more hard core for a red pill woman than to be chaste and very selective with who she chooses to sleep with. Abstaining from sex until you are in a rock solid relationship that is at fiancé level or about to be. That is the only time it is worth giving a man sex. Especially if you are a virgin.

Saying you want to have sex with that one man. And that you will only have sex with that one man. It is a precious gift. And any good man will see it as a precious gift!

Subscribing to so many other subreddits you can and will see so many stories of unhappy couples where one withholds or doesn’t want sex for x and y reasons.

One of the main reasons men want and crave marriage is procreation and more importantly, let’s call it “sex on demand” but within reason of course!

Another commenter made mention. They have regrets from not abstaining and being with anyone but their husband. I feel the same way about my relationship.

Birth control??? I am not a fan as it messes with your hormones and if you look into the side effects it really isn’t worth it unless you are going to be in a relationship that leads to marriage. (I know some birth control doesn’t seem effect some women but it is worth pointing out no need to be on drugs and having sex with random guys. Save yourself for the one and then get on the pill etc)

possiblyourgf · 2022-07-07T23:46:33+00:00

I’m going to take an unpopular stance here and just let you know that who you’ll be with and who you’ve been with does not and will not define you. Sex is not dirty or bad. Of course you want to protect yourself from pregnancy before you’re ready and protect your heart from getting hurt, but I think you’re ready when you’ve found someone you love, and you know loves you. If it doesn’t pan out, you’ll be happy to know your first loved you.

Anonymous_fiend · 2022-07-07T18:29:53+00:00

If you find yourself I'm a relationship and unable to control yourself sexually you don't need to go all the way. Fingering, using toys, and oral (there is still some risk with oral like stds) are other options. Soaking and the poophole loophole are not good substitutes.

Also distract yourself with hobbies, outings, amd friends/family. It's easier to fall prey to hormones taking over when you're bored or unstimulated. I'm pretty antiporn (it will cause you a lot of issues) but if you need to get that release masturbation without porn is better than casual/short term relationship sex.

brushshstrokes · 2022-07-07T11:58:23+00:00

The grass is not greener. When you have casual sex it is emotionally empty. Remember that men will judge you for losing your virginity. It is not something you can get back.It will wreck the chances of you having a happy marriage if you lose it.

As for advice... I myself have recently quit masturbating on top of quitting premarital sex. Obviously masturbate if you need to. This is just my preference.

What I do is avoid horny triggers. For example I don't drink alcohol. Alcohol reliably will make me horny and do and say things I later regret. So I cut it out.

Also, I don't stay out at night later than 11 pm. I don't have any male friends. I don't talk to any man after 9 PM as those conversations become sexual.

I avoid warm environments (hot tubs, saunas, the patch of warm sunlight under the window) as I find that warmth triggers my sexual desire. I don't watch or read porn. I limit the amount of time I spend looking at myself changing.

Try to control your environment as much as possible to limit temptation.

sunglasses90 · 2022-07-07T00:52:18+00:00

Definitely get on the pill. If anything it will regulate your period. The only thing that will lower your value more than a high body count is a kid. Besides that, masterbate. The orgasms are better anyway on your own than with a partner.

cbunni666 · 2022-07-07T13:40:56+00:00

You can sleep with one man you're not with and still will be looked at as a whore to whoever wants to shout their unwanted opinion at you. Society sucks.

With that being said. You can explore the world of dating while also enjoying the world of sex. I can understand the curiosity. Just be responsible going about it. Understand there is always the possibility of getting pregnant and STDs. Even 1% is still a possibility. Not trying to discourage you. Just want you to know. When I starting having sex I had rules I never ever broke. 1.) Condoms are always a must even when you're on the pill. The pill only keeps you from getting pregnant. Condoms are made to avoid pregnancy and STDs. They come in different shapes and can be fun. Especially the ribbed.

2.) Never let someone force you into sex when you're not ready or uncomfortable. Consent is always a must. This also goes to the partner. If they aren't comfortable or ready, stop.

3.) Don't expect the guy to have protection. Some guys got this sick thing about wanting to do it raw, as in no condoms. You said you want to avoid pregnancy so stop, abort, and run the other way. I don't care if the guy says "I got a vasectomy" or "I'm allergic to latex" (yet they never have alternative condoms), or "I'll just pull out". You got no proof to back this up so these guys are likely saying it so they can get into bed with you.

4.) Biggest one of all because this is how mistakes usually happen. Don't be dumb in the heat of the moment. I get it. You're horny, he's horny. You're ready to do it. Uh oh.. no condoms or anything. Oh well. No "oh well". Stop what you're doing and get protection. Even if he whines his head off. I would rather deal with 20 minutes of whining than 18 years of crying.

I know my answer is condom heavy but the things work. Yes, they have the possibility of coming off or breaking but it's slim. It drives me nuts when I hear how people are scared to teach sex education to teens that are clearly sexually curious. It's natural. They just say "abstinence" like they get $5 for Everytime they use the word in a sentence. Yes, abstinence is the way to go but I wasn't one of those that wanted to wait until marriage. If you want to, that's you. No judgement at all. I just want to help you avoid the need to go look for the nearest state that still have Planned Parenthood clinics.

If men can play the fields so can women. No one really has to know your sex life. This is probably against the RP lifestyle but you can still keep your red pill ways and not be a virgin when getting married. Good luck and be careful.

Title	Losing my virginity
Author	EnvironmentalPipe672
Upvotes	23
Comments	14
Date	July 7, 2022 12:26 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/vt51wv/losing_my_virginity/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/losing-my-virginity.1122772 https://theredarchive.com/post/1122772

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