Need advice about a man [24F]

Kaisern · 2022-03-27T13:32:27+00:00

he asked you what you’re doing for valentine’s day and you invited him to a group thing 🤦‍♂️ he wanted to take you on a date

Rita8696 · 2022-03-27T10:50:38+00:00

He asked you why you didn't text him for two weeks. That sounds interested to me. He may just be a bit more passive and you may need to chase a bit more if you like him. What is the worst thing that can happen? You are 24. Go for it. Ask him out and make a move.

mugatucrazypills · 2022-03-27T13:07:28+00:00

Ideally, the man makes the first move and that helps define manhood as someone willing to put himself out there ... but there are so many prohibitions and social sanctions on behavior and more and more each year that you'd be possibly missing out on opportunity if you were dogmatic about it. He might have been lied to and told he has to be always "nice" by society.

Anyways, I'd just be explicit and say to him you like him but you're a traditional person trying to develop a life for yourself in line with your values. Time/life is limited and you don't really engage in open-ended social interaction with men that isn't progressing to a committed relationship.

Maybe he moves from there.

as Robert Greene would say/Boy Scout mode

itsbigoleme · 2022-03-27T13:05:53+00:00

You are (fortunately) not correct! He asked you what your plans were for Valentine’s Day which was him trying to ask you out. I feel that you inviting him to a friend group hang out and then not texting him afterwards would send the message that you just want to be friends. Especially since you guys didn’t talk much during the party. Imo he wanted to take you on a date for Valentine’s Day. I would make plans with him again and during that date, let him know how you feel. I know you don’t want to chase, but what you’re doing is not close to chasing after him.

beepincheech · 2022-03-27T13:47:37+00:00

He’s not pursuing you. Or if in his mind he is, he is just too passive to make anything happen without you being the one to chase and be overtly forward. If you don’t want to do that, this isn’t the guy for you.

Catherine772023 · 2022-03-27T16:47:59+00:00

He initiated asking you about Valentine’s Day bc he wanted to date you.

He chased you.

Let him get you.

Start being more eager and be direct. Show your enthusiasm without being desperate. You have a chance and you want him so take it. It’s only your insecurities stopping you from going for a guy who wants you that you like.

What are you waiting for??

Niki_Biryani · 2022-03-27T17:28:50+00:00

Opinion from a guy. I believe he is into you. But the prohibitions and social sanctions on behavior, especially for a guy make it hard for most men to make the first move. Especially those who have been mistreated in the past, or have the anxiety of being mistreated or rejected for their approach. It is perfectly normal.

I think both of you feel the same way. You both like each other but are too afraid to be a little straightforward about it. Here is what you can do. You can simply ask him if he wants to hang out and then ask him out. He would most probably say yes. Then tell him that if he wants to take things forward, he needs to take some initiative otherwise you'll think that he is not interested in you and would spend your time elsewhere. It is a bit difficult to do but can be handled amicably. This would save you a ton of time and would also remove all the pressure from the guy and he would feel a little more relaxed asking you out next time.

Unless your requirement is that he be a manly man that has to get over his struggles and ask you out properly and make all the initiative. Then you can simply reject him. He might not be able to get over his struggles at the moment. Especially since he is young. It takes most men to reach their late 20s before they get this kind of confidence.

perceptionsmk · 2022-03-27T21:53:48+00:00

Mans perspective here. Your on RPW so I am assuming your looking for a traditional man.

What are your goals? Do you want to be married, a mother? What is your timeline for these life events?

Can this man make enough to provide those things in that timeline? Do you want to work when you have kids?

It seems like your focused on the details of this relationship rather than the bigger picture.

Cassiopeia_major · 2022-03-27T13:30:23+00:00

It seems to me that he's not really into me, otherwise he would have made a move by now.

Honestly I think your intuition is correct. When a man is interested, he will let you know. You said he's extroverted and handsome, I'm sure he knows how to pursue a woman he wants. I'm not saying he doesn't like you at all, but his actions make him sound very lukewarm. In your post I'm seeing a lot of "we had a nice time, a good conversation, etc." then long periods of no communication. Him asking you "why did you stop texting me?" is almost gas-lighty, to prevent you from questioning why he hasn't talked to you.

It could be he's not into you specifically, or this man isn't in a place to have a relationship, who knows! The reason isn't important. I'm sure there's a man out there who will want you 100%.

spacemangoes · 2022-03-27T16:43:42+00:00

ok. not my place because I am a guy but, sounds like hes a nice guy. ok. First thing. don't tell yourself that you are out of his league. guys usually don't care about that. we care if the girl is genuinely inrested in us. lets say hes into you and wants to be with you, but you put out these negative vibes with your overthinking and it can be a turn off. I can understand how you feel, its the complete opposite of what you want but, guys cant read between lines. even if we can, we would rather think rationally. Don't worry about it and just ask him to hangout. be nice and may be cook him a meal. and he is all yours. Good luck :)

Title	Need advice about a man [24F]
Author	AdvantageFuture3651
Upvotes	23
Comments	34
Date	March 27, 2022 9:31 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/tpggtw/need_advice_about_a_man_24f/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/need-advice-about-a-man-24f.1110032 https://theredarchive.com/post/1110032

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