TLDR: "Don't fuck it up" seems to be glazed over on this sub. By maintaining a healthy masculine frame, you will find that many huge issues solve themselves.
Body:
The importance of frame cannot be overstated. Natural betas tend to supplicate, rather than dominate. We want to explain ourselves. We respect others' opinions and desire their approval. While TRP talks at huge length as to how these are flaws, and how to correct them, I would like to discuss frame a bit today.
I am not Chad Thundercock. I am average height, with a good build, but certainly not jacked. My frame, however, exudes masculinity. Maintaining this in the light of stressful situations grants me long term success. Myself and everyone around me enjoys life just a little bit more because I don't overthink situations.
It's easy to do this, especially when you have worked years to change yourself from an absolute slob to something far greater. You know your flaws, and how crippled you once were by them. You know your weak spots. You correctly view the world as an invasive weed, seeking roots in any small crack of your psyche. Aggressively fighting these weeds while they are small prevents them from growing.
Something changes, eventually. One day, you realize that people do not view you as cracked. The assumption of weakness turns into an assumption of strength. This is a shocking fact.
I used to fuck this up frequently. I could feel tension in the air between girls and myself, and would hamster a reason not to escalate. I would be embarassed about my vehicle, a beat up honda. I would freely and shamefully admit to things.
We can change. I present three examples of subtle frame within the last year that have stuck with me.
A plate and I were enjoying a pretty decent summer day. Earlier in the week, she had given me a bit of hassle about my vehicle - she didn't particularly LIKE being seen in an utter shitbox, and to be truthful, I didn't either. Now, I had been looking into purchasing a new car, and in fact, had one picked out - but this information I kept to myself. Instead, I pulled her against me, gently dissolving her anxiety. Not a week later, she's tripping over herself explaining how she actually LIKES my car because it's "unique". Blew me the fuck away.
I was socializing with a group of people generally older than me and well connected. Old school locals - the type who know everyone and can get things done for you. Friends you want. I was introduced to this group by a coworker. Her husband is used to her bringing people into the fold. He's also used to her bringing in bottom of the barrel feminized men, which is something he hates. He is AMOGing me hard, mocking me hard because apparently I had a little bit of fun with some tinder girls that they knew. He doesn't approve of short term relationships, and is old school blue collar. My button down fitted shirts and behavior made him dislike the very idea of me. I mostly ignore his AMOG attempts, instead focusing on other members of the group and genuinely enjoying myself. I never insulted him. Eventually, his wife tells him to stop that, to which I reply, "No it's fine. How else would I know he likes me?". This simple statement, along with holding frame, ended any issues.
Had a different girl at my place, and we're enjoying ourselves. I hear a noise outside and realize that my coworker is coming over to drop off some files I need to work on. My coworker is fairly hot. While I could have explained to my plate what was going on, I instead told her to wait in the bedroom. I walk outside where she can see the two of us. I have some words with my coworker (thanks, but I have someone over right now), hug her tight, and send her on her way. I never explained what happened to my plate. I'll let the sub imagine what happened next.
Every example could have been handled in multiple ways. Many times, simply not handling them leads to better outcomes, because the hamster does the heavy lifting for you.
Lesson Learned: After working your ass off on improving yourself, you gain the benefit of people making assumptions for your benefit. Learn to identify these situations, and leverage this whenever possible. View your words like you do your money - not to be given freely.
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