Finding TRP as a Teenager

Sidgil · 2014-12-18T13:14:13+00:00

One of the problems you seem to be having is self-acceptance. You were dealt a shitty hand so far in life. You cannot change the past. The only thing you can control is your actions, and with that your future.

You said in your post that you have been bullied. Although you are fairly athletic, you must continue moving forward. Lift. If you don't have access to a gym, go to r/fitness and search for body weight exercises. In fact, go to r/fitness; they have tons of useful info. Also, learn some self-defense. Anything, whether it's karate or boxing. Become strong. You can be the guy no one wants to mess with.

I also suggest you meditate. Before you sleep, spend somewhere between 5 to 20 minutes sitting and staring at the wall. Focus on your breathing. The goal is to think as little as possible. When you start to have a thought, accept it and gently push it away. Also, don't sweat it if you end up thinking a lot during your meditation. The point is to practice being self aware of your body, emotion, and thoughts. You will become more mentally and emotionally strong as a result.

You also mention you act distant with others. The barrier you have is isolating you from all the friends, plates, and LTRs you can have. The barrier is not there to protect you. It is a jail cell. If I had to guess, I would say the barrier comes from a time in your childhood when you were bullied or shunned. This barrier will be hard to get rid of, but you don't have a choice. You will succeed or you will hit the bricks. It will be hard. You will become social, and in doing so go against your natural reaction of being distant. You will become composed and emotionally independent, although you are not right now. You will lift, run, and train. You will get ripped. And it all will be hard. But remember; you have no other choice. Yes, you could become an insecure, blue pill, fat social recluse like so many "men" nowadays. You can sit in your room and cry. Or you can do everything suggested in the comments and make a better life. You will build your new life, brick by brick, day by day, with every action you take. I wish you luck. I look forward to the man you will become in a few years.

Sarcasticus · 2014-12-18T15:09:50+00:00

I would argue that to stop this aimless feeling, you need some goals in life. Sit down and decide for yourself what you want to achieve in life.

Think of it like this: if you could wave a magic wand, and your life were perfect in every way, what would that look like? Where would you be working? Where would you be living? Who would you be socializing with? etc...

Don't worry about the how's, for now, just write down what your perfect life would look like. Once that's done, you've given yourself some targets to shoot for. Now you can go about formulating a plan of action in order to achieve these goals.

I know things seem pretty grim at the moment, but you should consider yourself lucky you've found TRP at such a young age. You have a whole lifetime ahead of you - you can start working today towards a life you truly want to live.

The other thing I'll say:

I'm not sure if its hormones?

As a teenager, your brain is still developing. You are indeed being bombarded by a surge of hormones during your teenage years. As a result, the feelings you feel are way more intense than the feelings you'll feel in your mid 20's, say. It is entirely possible to feel like your life is ending at one moment, then moving to cloud 9 in the next moment. The teenage years are difficult to navigate, and I would argue for your own sake, to seek a zen state of mind. Hockey players often talk about "not getting too high, not getting too low" - and I would argue you should try to adopt this mentality.

Understand that you have a tremendous opportunity in front of you. I wish you all the best.

p3ndulum · 2014-12-18T12:36:19+00:00

Stop worrying about your relationships and start focusing on developing your skills.

Learn how to build a house. Learn how to cook. Learn how to fix a car. Learn how to take care of your body, and self-defense. Learn how to build a computer and how to code.

Make yourself busy and only make time for the people that truly matter to you.

In due time, you won't have any more problems. At least none that you won't be able to fix yourself.

IanIronwood · 2014-12-18T13:45:55+00:00

You're young. You're in training. So . . . train. It will help get rid of all of those feelz you've been having.

At this point in your life, you're building your boat. If your dad's boat sucked, learn from his mistakes while honoring his effort. If you feel an emotional attachment to your mother, acknowledge to yourself that you will always love her even if your relationship with her must change.

These are all difficult transitions to make, and in a better society you would have a company of men (including your dad) to help you make them, but at least you have us.

Build your boat. Don't worry about where you're going to sail it to, yet. Just make it a damn good boat.

Jakenbake781 · 2014-12-18T15:47:29+00:00

I found trp when I was 17, I'm 18 right now. I'm kinda in the same boat as you. Sometimes all I want is a blue pill relationship. Where I can get married and have kids and all that. But I now realize that's bullshit and that unicorn doesn't exist.

But overall I'm glad I have these rp qualities. Although I haven't completely "swolled the pill", I'm glad that I have learned the things I have learned.

tyofwa · 2014-12-18T16:53:58+00:00

i don't know who i am, and it feels like there is too much to work on.

A couple re-reads through and this appears to be the essence of your message. 99% of the replies to you have spot-on advice so Ill keep it brief. Accomplish SOMETHING WORTHWHILE. Anything. Could be a sport, could be skateboarding, could be programming an app, could be running a marathon. Set a meaningful goal and bust your ass to achieve it. Then achieve another goal. And another.

The recipe is simple - the more time you focus on looking FORWARD, the less time you have to dwell on the present or past. By looking forward with an eye toward goals, you will achieve results. Achievement of meaningful goals is a cornerstone of personal happiness.

Final thought from someone much wiser than me...

Nothing worth doing is cheap or easy

2014-12-18T13:57:02+00:00

Don't worry about relationships as a teenager. Focus on your studies and doing cool shit with your life. I'm not saying avoid girls all together, but don't take them so seriously. Also take everything you read here with a grain of salt. There's some truth to things, but there's also a whole lot of generalizing.

My rule of thumb with chicks is to NEVER think about them. Just go with your gut. Thinking about women is like digging a hole to the point where the hole's too deep to climb out.

Also, don't beat yourself up over mistakes. Mistakes are going to be your greatest motivation for learning, sometimes it's a blessing that mistakes happen.

Grainslol · 2014-12-18T16:19:33+00:00

Before we jump to any conclusions let's question about whether or not it is in fact the hormones. Are you eating enough? If you're lifting and not eating enough it will spike your cortisol levels and amplify the stress you're feeling. Cortisol is pumped out to balance out the testosterone, and you're a teenager. When I was a teenager I was fat and I ate a lot and the problems of being bullied SEEMED to not bother me at the time. See how you feel after you eat a steak.

Are you comfortable being selfish? Not being 100% comfortable being selfish caused me to be stressed out a lot. Don't let your mom make you feel bad for that (was the case for me). My dad's beta too. He was in vietnam and he is a decorated Vietnam War veteran and he is constitutionally incapable of making a sincere emotional connection with me or my older brother. At least now that you are aware and that it is outside of your control, you can only control yourself.

It also doesn't help that being in high school feels like being in a prison.

exit_sandman · 2014-12-18T14:27:30+00:00

This will probably get me a bunch of downvotes, but I don't think TRP is the proper reading materials for teenagers especially if they lack the ambiguity tolerance for the more controversial messages.

Because let's be honest here, the most important problems a guy has in his teens could be solved by successfully applying PUA advice.

JohnDavidsonR · 2014-12-18T14:12:49+00:00

Get into exercising. Find your passion. Read 48 Laws of Powers, then read How To Win Friends, and Influence people. You're right actually. A lot of us find things like this post-puberty. You'll be able to use most of this advice, but you have to really just keep it in the back of your mind for now.

Rhunta · 2014-12-18T15:00:49+00:00

I discovered trp when I was 18. I did not click immediately it. You think that it clicks and than you discover something new and you think that your are on the top level. But that is not tru. You are going to see things deeper and deeper.

The best thing that we as young man can do is soft monk mode. Focus on you. Chill with yourself, you are going to have to live with yourself your whole life.

Discover what you like and what you love. Invest in yourself physically and mentaly.

I would also recommend the book mastery by robert greene.

rpscrote · 2014-12-18T18:45:27+00:00

Join a team sport. Start socially with male bonding and let female bonding flow from it

IceBunz · 2014-12-18T21:10:25+00:00

16 y/old here, when I first discovered TRP I was kind of shocked that this was all true, but it has helped me for the better. To be completely honest I was getting there myself but when I found TRP it kinda sped things up if you understand what I mean. Yeah, it's shocking but the earlier you learn the better, so that you can use it to your advantage and not do stupid / awkward stuff and have a super beta behaviour like I used to have. I too was told to "be myself, be nice" and all of that shit but the earlier you see past those lies the better for you.

EDIT: I'm a lurker, I believe this is my first post in TRP.

Spirax212 · 2014-12-18T23:31:56+00:00

Mate, don't blame yourself. Much of your teenage years are dictated by all the passive influences of your parents.

The most important thing is that you try to modernise yourself.

The way you style your hair, how you interact with people, the way you carry yourself, the clothes you wear, having a job and having a formal education. University will be hard for you if you aren't a modernised individual. The entire environment will seem ALIEN to you and you will look for every excuse to drop it. Many of people drop the subjects not because they aren't intelligent enough or anything, they just weren't groomed to succeed in that environment.

The system is set up so that someone without these modernised qualities fails. That's what modernising someone means.

Acx3 · 2014-12-18T16:28:10+00:00

1) Focus on solving one problem at a time. If the selected problem seems too overwhelming to overcome, break it down into small steps.

2)Try to think apart from your present feelings as well. Feelings lie all the time and they cause poor judgement. Let me say that again, your feelings will lie to you constantly, "hey this is a bad idea, this will never work, you can't ever have it better etc." -complete BS. If you can embrace pain you can obtain what you want.

3)If you're beating on yourself all the time, you need to change the way you view yourself. Embrace this paradox. You are the man, yet you are a looser.

Popeman79 · 2014-12-18T12:54:26+00:00

I feel for you man. It's a huge and bitter pill to swallow, and being a teenager you have hardly any stable ground under you.

My advice: don't forget to have fun, live your youth, make mistakes. Don't focus so much about girls. You still have a long way to go to be alpha with them. Instead of looking outside towards girls and society (which you have realized are very complex), look inside: define what makes you happy, what kind of person you want to be. Work on that.

You will become happy and alpha with time. There is no rush.

2014-12-18T13:59:15+00:00

You're lucky. Had I found this place in my teens I'd have been in a better place compared to where I am right now. Take it one step at a time. Build yourself. Lift. Work on being the best at what you do or what you are doing at the moment. For instance, if you play a sport, train hard to reach a higher level and raise the bar for your teammates to follow. Stop worrying about other people and relationships. Set goals and work on achieving them. Once you manage all of that, the ladies will come along and that aspect of your life will be taken care of. When they do, you will be aware of what to expect and things will be easier with them too.

p3riod · 2014-12-18T18:14:07+00:00

Navy seals, arguably the toughest sons of bitches on the planet,are told upon entrance to the bootcamp, "If you look at this as the toughest 6-9(?) months of your life, you will not make it! All you need to do is ring that bell by the mess hall and you can go home. And many of you will. About 60%. Instead I advise you to take this one day at a time. Do not think about the future. Only think about the now. You will live in hell on earth here. So remember, one day at a time."

My advice to you, is sit down for 15 mins and make a plan of what you want to do. People here say "lifting is da beeessssst! bro-five" but I'm going to go ahead and disagree with that. I don't lift regularly and have a naturally athletic build,and still pull plenty of girls no sweat. Lifting builds confidence which people in general are attracted to, so its what you should strive for. And what gave me confidence was talking to people, and dressing better. The more I did it the more confident I became, the more confident I became the more people were attracted to me. So I would make that number one, followed by meditation, followed by lifting. Do these three things and your life will change for the better. It can be as simple as striking up a conversation with someone sitting next to you in class before the bell rings, asking your mother how her day was consistently and being genuinely interested, or even talking to the bum on the train. Just practice talking to people and making eye contact, and shit will get better.

BhiQ · 2014-12-18T19:02:03+00:00

I understand how you feel but learning early is definetly not a disadvantage. Sounds like you're going through the depression phase of TRP, that's normal. Once you start increasing your SMV your confidence will return/come into existence and things will be much better than before.

I found the Red Pill way too late so now I always have to decide on whether to do something to work on myself or to get some work done for uni. Wish I had found it right after school, I had a lot more time back then (obviously)

RedPillSafe · 2014-12-18T21:41:37+00:00

You might take a look into Neoreaction.

Red Pill mostly concerns itself with sexual issues which tend to produce a lot of anxiety for "children". (you are a teen, I'm in my 50's)

By studying Neoreaction you get the same penetrating wisdom of Red Pill, but it has a broader political and philosophical view.

Get out of your "self" and wake up to history.

/r/DarkEnlightenment is good to start.

Realize you are part of something both grand and monsterous. This Marxist dream we all live in is far more sinister than you probably yet realize.

Learn more... seek the truth.

smokingmonkey420 · 2014-12-18T21:59:09+00:00

Take all of that anger and frustration and channel it to become a cocky fucking asshole. You won't have anxiety, or overthink things and people will be more attracted to you.

applesaucejenkins · 2014-12-18T22:28:16+00:00

I'll be 29 next month and I'm fairly new to RP. I wish to God I had known about it earlier. I see a lot of things about myself that are RP and a lot of learned behaviors that are very beta, and I sometimes beat myself up about it knowing that I COULD have been so much better off all these years had I just tweaked a few social habits and done a few things differently.

That's where you're in a great spot. Now that you're seeing the truth and can identify your weaknesses you're getting upset over them. Don't. Better for you to find out now while you have time to change and groom those traits into skills and habits so they become part of you. Don't beat yourself up over how your life has been in the past. Instead understand that when you're in your prime you'll have the opportunity to really be on top of your game and enjoy the success you're working toward.

I_Usually_Just_Read · 2014-12-18T23:04:57+00:00

As a young man (slightly older than you) i can relate to your situation. So ill give it to you like TRP is known too.

If you don't fit in, make yourself fit in. Look around at what is "hot" or "cool" and learn from it, twist it and turn it to make it your own and wear it with pride. Have a style that shows your part of the crowd, because in high school its all about groups, learn to make friends and how to be socially adept ; think of high school like a smaller world in the world, this will help you later on as an adult. Besically- fit in, even if it uncomfortable, don't be the outcast.

Chase some tail, BUT ITS NOT ALL "BOUT THA PUSSY BRAH!", i read some of these comments and they reek of this shit. This is not bad advise, its just that it is the same as "be a man!", or "stop being a bitch!" same old bullshit. So yes chase some tail, lean from mistakes, experience things. Make sure to learn from them, this will shape your character and will help you set boundaries with women. Do yourself a favor and FALL IN LOVE. And before i get replied to death by the "brahs", let me explain why. Truly falling for a woman is beautiful, doesn't matter how blue pill, this will be a beautiful experience and it will add value to your life. Its an experience that you do not-not want to experience ("gramer natszis FIREE!") That being said, know that AWALT, there is no unicorn. Falling for one will show you this and it will help you learn and embody it. Keep this on the back of your head.

Get one or two hobbies that you enjoy and that will PROVIDE VALUE. Sports, guitar, anything that you enjoy. Also lift. In total 2-3 hobbies, lifting mandatory. This will give you enough time to fuck around, teach you discipline, and become more valuable at an early age. Fuck I'm jealous of you! Lol.

Have friends you can honestly trust. Now for the paradox, don't trust anyone. Everyone is out for themselves; there is no free lunch, there is always someone that pays. Put your happiness first, with women, family, your dog and fuck the cat. To me this is the root of masculinity. RIP Patrice O' Neal.

And like that one old man craigslist post said, "99% of advice is useless, take what you need."

skinnysandvs · 2014-12-18T23:37:11+00:00

I'm also a teenager who found it. The only thing that bothers me is that I've become repulsed by the idea of dating/getting serious with a girl. The more I read and find out that literally AWALT, I see it in my everyday life and I no longer desire to date girls. Just to hook up or be friends with benefits

But also realize that TRP isn't just about being "beta/alpha or getting girls" but it's just about being a better man and having your head screwed on right. And young guys like us are just getting a head start. Keep reading man

Menadian · 2014-12-19T00:24:13+00:00

The right time for engaging in TRP is the time you find it.

HumbleEngineer · 2014-12-19T02:49:20+00:00

Indeed it's not a good thing to find out when you are young. At least not entirely. You need to have the burned hand as a reminder of why red pill works. That's why a strong male model is so praised here. Because it's needed.

As others have stated, focus on yourself. Hear your parents, specially your father, as no one is entirely alpha or beta. Learn from his mistakes. Even a bad role model is a role model, even if you have to ignore some parts. Don't resent him as it's more than probable that he loves you and wants the best for you.

Don't be afraid to do something wrong. This is growing. You won't get it right on the first time, so relax. Keep an eye out, but relax.

You'll do just fine.

sarcastichornyfuck · 2014-12-19T03:38:42+00:00

1st things 1st : dont give a fuck what your parents are. They love you no matter what so do the same back. Im in the same boat as you here, and my biggest bit of advice is too let some shit go. Don't worry about stuff so much and do what you want. People might bitch and moan about it but in the end they will respect you more. Don't worry about 'who you are' as it's a waste of time. I used to let that shit get me down too, but i learned to become the man i want the be, not the easiest 'man' i can be, which culture today seems to think every man should be. If you don't know who you are it is because your over thinking it. Think of your biggest hero. Everyday try do 1 thing that will make you more like him or her. And remember your not the only one going through this. Be hard enough on yourself to motivate yourself, but not so hard on yourself that you destroy self worth that you have. Your only gonna be as good as you make yourself be.

bxredpill · 2014-12-19T04:38:10+00:00

Man, I feel you. I really do. I found TRP at 17 and its been two years since then. Its just like you said; the first few months are fantastic. You feel like you can conquer the world with this newfound knowledge of yours. You finally have an edge on everyone else and you're gonna fuck loads of girls and just become a beast of a man.

But then after a few months, or even after a year like me, theres a sort of hiccup in how you want to proceed with your life. Ive still been struggling with figuring the type of man I want to be. I feel like im being crushed by all the pressures im placing on myself to become the best version of myself in all aspects. I have to do well in school, I have to be manly,i cant be vulnerable, i have to fuck a lot of girls, i have to get my work done, i have to...etc. and on top of this I have my family to worry about too. They're Albanian immigrants and they have high expectations of me now that my frame has changed so radically due to trp. They treat me like another adult in the house and actually respect me. I have 3 older brothers that dont get the same recognition due to their own shortcomings. Because of them, I have to do better. I have no choice.

I have no idea what the hell i have to do get out of this depressive mood ive been in lately. The only thing i have is my gym. Something about working out just destroys any of these shitty thoughts i have. It seems good at first but I've started to view it as a means to escape stress that catches up with me from trying to work on all my faults at once. I dont want to escape it, i want to conquer and fucking destroy it. I wish i could figure out what the hell i need to do get me out of this, but i have no one to help guide me. I have no role model. Im fucking lost, guys.

Ive been thinking about going to therapy to help face the issue head-on, but I have a lot of reservations about doing it because of the stigma associated with people that need therapy. What the hell do I do?

The_Juggernauts_Dad · 2014-12-19T04:55:51+00:00

I'm jealous you found it out so early. Trust me, you're better off.

fap_the_pain_away · 2014-12-20T14:26:37+00:00

Holy shit you are SO FUCKING LUCKY. Imagine all the poor dudes out there in the West right now who are oblivious to reality. You've basically been given the manual for life. (Well, no, you opened the door and discovered it yourself. Credit where it's due.)

Listen, you ought to be thrilled about finding this place at such a young age. Just don't dwell on it and waste your youth reading reddit posts.

Go live your life, and have a massive advantage over everyone else out there, male or female.

You will still fuck up a lot, we all do, but you will learn from those experiences MUCH faster with a RP framework.

Get alpha hobbies now. Lift, play guitar, ride motorcycles, pick up chicks. You have a clean slate to BUILD reference experience. It's much easier to learn something with a fresh slate, than to unlearn bad habits and then relearn things properly.

2chainzFLEX · 2014-12-18T12:36:49+00:00

I had your story, I just turned 20 and swallowed the pill a while ago like 6 months.

Lift. Learn to fight/start boxing and get as ripped as quickly as possible.

As for your dad, mine is a huge beta bux hes like 9/10 beta. Start to be a better man at everything you can, lift, fight, conversate. Also being bigger is more "alpha" in a massive way to your parents. (H8 that word used here most of the time) when you win over your mom its just understood :| in those qualities. She takes me more seriously than him on some things.

As for chicks, walk in like a golden pile of shit and back it up. Frame. Be that guy she will tingle for.

Last thing I would do is start stacking money and learning how that shit works, its way more important than chicks imo.

Oh and that emotional stuff? Leave that behind a nasty whore. Life gets better brah, motivate yourself everyday and it will all pay off.

villarm006 · 2014-12-18T15:09:30+00:00

BrUh !!! Consider yourself lucky man , this is my first day on here reading and I feel I've been slowly getting better on a natural curve and this sub reinforces my confidence and I'm happy.

Your story is just like mine mother father social recluse , but I'm 27 your so lucky your young. Your going to be a boss ass mother F by the time your my age. Chin up , be proud start owning life you have no idea what page you've turned over. Your going to be amazing.

RockyMountainTaste · 2014-12-18T18:47:42+00:00

"Game" is unlocked at a higher level- when you have mastered the art of cynicism and are tired of being the nice guy.

I recommend starting with memes to get the Red Pill ideas. I made a subreddit /r/RedPill_Memes! I want it to take off with people like you, OP.

Also get CBT for your insecurity

Adun4184 · 2014-12-19T01:15:38+00:00

I'm 18, discovered TRP at 17. Here's my advice. You're young and you've got your whole life ahead of you to work on improving yourself. Don't worry about "getting pussy," that's not what TRP is about. For now, find your interests and talents and surround yourself with people you'll have things in common with. Join extracurriculars.Develop your social skills. Learn how to make people laugh. When you hang out with people, start taking initiative. "let's go to x and do y." As others have said, start going to the gym and get in shape.

orvken · 2014-12-18T14:16:18+00:00

Dude, you're getting fucking bullied. Start lifting. Weak kids do not necessarily means bullying victim, but all bullying victim are weak looking kids. No matter what your game is, if you're being bullied you are still a pathetic fucking loser in the eye of girls.

pcadrian · 2014-12-18T13:30:45+00:00

If you were older, you wouldn't have had that many experiences to begin with, and if you did have experiences, it would've done more harm than good.

eccentricrealist · 2014-12-18T12:44:13+00:00

Stop being such a fucking pussy. I'm 19, found TRP last year, and started working on getting my shit together. So should you. You're attached to your mother? Get some independence. Your dad's a beta? That's his problem, not yours, you can lead a horse to water but he'll choose to drink it or not. Lots of social anxiety? Get out more, watch comedy, read books, develop a better vocabulary.

If you'd found this when you were older, you would've been hit harder by regret of past experiences where you had the sure thing and still managed to fuck up somehow. Yes, a small identity crisis is part of the deal, but once you accept the nature of this world then you can finally adapt yourself to it in order to thrive in it.

What I suggest:

Lift, eat lean, etc. Maybe nofap if porn consumes a lot of time. Force yourself to go out, meet people, socialize, network. If you're in college and don't have time then once you're on vacation get a fucking job like being a waiter or at a bar, it'll help you a lot. Be ruthless when you're talking to girls, in the sense that you won't be shy about what you like and you will build a titanium frame. It'll take time to make yourself a better man than what you are right now but anybody can do it if they actually grow a pair and go for it.

Title	Finding TRP as a Teenager
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	59
Comments	77
Date	December 18, 2014 11:54 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2pocn5/finding_trp_as_a_teenager/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/finding-trp-as-a-teenager.26575 https://theredarchive.com/post/26575

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