Summary:

Think about how a woman acts, not what she says. The truth will eventually reveal itself.

Body:

Last night I went on a second date with a woman I met off of Tinder. I've been having very good luck on there as an older guy who recently re-entered the dating world. Our first date ended with us back at her place (unprompted by me) but not really doing anything physical because she had a cold sore beyond touching. There were a couple of red flags there but she was a very cool woman, we had a lot in common and she makes good money and is smart, probably about a 7 to most men.

Cue two weeks later. I've been keeping up sexual tension with text banter (thanks to some of the posters here) and took her to a new pool bar that just opened up I wanted to check out. I think now that she was comfortable she opened up a bit more and revealed some things, and by the time the night was done my observations made me realize that I dodged a bullet this morning.

She showed up wearing a provocative outfit on a Tuesday night, also told me she had done a shot at the bar across the street already. I took this as a red flag only because what her body language told me and what her words told me were different. She was responsive to flirting and touching but then would suddenly pull away as if giving me severe LMR. Then, after about an hour she said we should go back to the bar across the street and then back to her place. Great, I'm going to get some action - but my Spidey sense was tingling.

At the bar I found out she knew the bartender. And had hung out there quite a bit. The next funny thing that happened was (and thanks to the bro code for this one) the bartender gave me a funny look when she wasn't looking almost as if to say "dude, run". I wasn't drinking because I had to drive home but she did another shot and had another beer, informing me that she was now "quite inebriated". We are being very kino friendly but again she's doing push-pull all the time, which again is a big red flag for me.

Get back to her place and she immediately changes into a tank top and shorts so I'm thinking game on. We make out a bit and she's biting my lip, doing all of the right things but then constantly is pulling away when I try to escalate. Normally in that type of situation I'd Sex God method her and just start going caveman, but for some reason this girl made me think that was a bad idea. I decided to nope out as after about half an hour of this something just wasn't jiving. She was giving the classic lines "I only have sex with guys I'm serious with" (really, that's why I've been back at your place twice and you're now almost naked?), "You need to go home now" (and then when I stood up would immediately grab me again), finally I just got tired of it.

When I told her I had to go she almost attacked me, but one final attempt at escalation by me (I slid my hand into her shorts and she was dripping wet and moaned when I did it) and she whipped out this red pill gem after I stopped:

"You know, if I called the police I could have you charged with sexual assault for that." Woah. However, I also knew that the wrong thing would be to just cut and run after that type of crazy ass statement. I calmly did a bit more making out, then quietly grabbed my stuff and left, even though I could tell she didn't want me to.

Thinking back after I left red flags were abundant: highly sexualized but insecure (she had to do a shot before meeting me), frequented bars often enough to have bartenders give me a red flag look, no barriers to entry but then fought against any type of physical escalation, then crazy statements threatening me when she didn't get her way.

In short gentlemen, watch for these signs and trust your instincts. If I had done what I think she actually wanted me to do and dominated her I think I'd run the high risk of a rape charge and/or God knows what else, because if she invited me back to her place twice in the first two dates, she's definitely done that before. Crazy signs were all there, but sometimes when we think with our little head we ignore them.

Lessons Learned:

Have abundance - I didn't care about getting laid therefore I had no problem listening to my instincts and cutting out.

Watch not only her but what's around her - ie the bartender giving me a sign.

Don't lose your cool when a potentially ugly situation rears its' head. I'm still going to text her today and say I had a good time in order to get a positive response back from her just in case she ever tries something weird. But I will not see her again.