Introduction

Hey, some of you might remember me, some might not. Long term lurker, short time poster here. Been making little bits of progress since my last posts, baby steps but steps nonetheless. But my progress isn't why I'm here today. I'm here with a story.

Summary

Housemates and friends have been drifting from me lately, and I assumed it was me being weird, having an offensive sense of humour, or me changing after swallowing the pill. Turns out it was much more simple. It all went back to a woman, and a white knight or two.

Body

I'm a college student living with four other people. One I was good friends with (lets call him Jake), one I was acquaintances with (Bob), and two I didn't really know at all (Alice and Josh). They were all clean, never stayed up late making noise, compared to who I lived with last year, they seemed like saints. But while they smiled to my face, they spread rumors and complaints behind my back, which I only knew about due to overhearing their "gossip" sessions. At first, I dealt with it by being nicer and more considerate to them because, even though it was by a small margin, I was technically the worst housemate. This only made their complaints more nit-picky, and any attempt to challenge them ended in them deflecting the questions by calling me names, or just flat out lying through their teeth. And I suspected that these whispers were finding their way to my friends. Something else was going on.

At first, it appeared this was just due to me having annoyed them a few times (eg. once, Bob talked about how his friends all find his sister attractive, to which I replied that his sister was attractive. I apologized immediately once I realized this was a soft spot of his, but that didn't stop him storming out of the room to stew). Due to my hesitation to go full Machiavelli, my first reaction was to call the house together to talk. I apologized for any actions I did wrong, because best case scenario: it works flawlessly and this stops; worst case scenario: it fails utterly, and I use the fact that I tried to make peace to make myself look like the sane person in the argument.

Spoiler alert: It failed utterly.

So I started digging. Asking mutual friends and one of my more neutral housemates what the hell was really going on. And eventually, I got Jake to spill. It all started on a "housemates night out", where we got drunk and at one point skipped down the road linking arms, cause they were drunk, and that's what they do. I joined in, holding Alice's hand instead of linking arms because it was easier that way. And from that one event, Alice became convinced I was in love with her. Now Alice is quite the stunner, but I've never been interested. Getting involved with housemates is trouble. But Bob, as her long time friend(zone), got jealous. And thus, the drama and the shadow wars began. I'll go into more detail in the comments if need be.

Some friends started getting involved in this gossiping sessions, led by a girl I knew, so I asked my good friend(lets call him John) to hep with this, as he works with counselling and support groups and I thought he could be a good help. Unfortunately, he regularly makes out with, and is trying to get sex off of the aforementioned girl, and the first thing he did was show her my request and laugh at it for brownie points. I'm on antidepressants and have attended counselling from the very group he works for, and he knows this. But he also knows he hasn't had sex in months, and thirst>everything else. Including the well-being of his friend. At this point, I realized I'd just showed my entire hand to the enemy. And now I have a war on my hands.

And it all started with a woman.

Lessons Learned

Sometimes, beautiful women will become convinced you are attracted to them, because they can't imagine that maybe, just maybe, they're not that special. Their white knights can be incredibly dangerous if you don't know how to fight them, and thirst overrules all other emotions. Some of them will gladly knife you in the back for a whiff of pussy if you don't have enough to offer them. And sometimes, it works.