I started my journey, my exodus from the blue pill world just over two years ago. I had come out of a relationship where I had fallen so hard for my girlfriend that we attended couples counseling and I accepted infidelity. I tried to make it work because I truly loved someone who didn't love me back. But it felt like she loved me.

My exgirlfriend had Borderline Personality Disorder. For those in the community unfamiliar with BPD, it manifests in rapid mood shifts from displays of intense love and affection to deep hatred and contempt. It's the closest thing to experiencing a Jekyll and Hyde in real life. The problem with women who have BPD is that those intense feelings of love and affection are frequent early on in the relationship, during the "honeymoon" phase so to speak, and it lures you in.

When my relationship with her ended (I finally worked up the courage to break up after almost two years), I was a shell of a man. Near the end of our relationship I was an alcoholic. I was drinking and crying myself to sleep over how fucked up my life felt. In reality, I had a great job and was making $70k a year at 24. I was in good health. I had my own apartment. But my life without my girlfriend felt empty. I felt empty.

I made small steps to get back into the world. I went out with friends. I started meeting women. I met one girl at an afterhours that I liked so much we started dating. I fell for her pretty quickly, within weeks, but she broke that off when it started getting serious to get back with her exboyfriend. That was a good lesson for me in the fickleness of women - and because it was rather quick and painless, was not so bad to experience.

This is the time I like to think I started to make the conversion from blue pill to red. I hadn't discovered TRP yet, but I had gotten laid pretty quickly after ending a seriously traumatic relationship. It was my first indication that I had sexual market value. I didn't have to be alone.

I got into the gym. I was 215 lbs and super out of shape at around 28% body fat. I was unhappy with my body and knew that, if for no one else, I had to improve my physique for myself. Maybe one day I could be fit. I started eating healthier. Visited /r/keto and adopted the diet. Within 3 months I had lost 20 lbs. Within 6 I was starting to have abs. Holy shit.

This is when the women began to notice me. I didn't know what to do with the attention. I blew some opportunities with interested girls by not knowing how to break through LMR. One Server i picked up at a bar literally brought me back to her apartment and slept with me on her couch all night. I never once tried to fuck her. What the fuck was I thinking?

But I started trying to live again. Make life more interesting. I went skydiving. Bought a motorcycle. Took up bodybuilding. Invested in myself. I bought a condo. Went to music festivals. I left my job to start a new career. It was more than enough excitement to make 2013 and 2014 the best years of my life.

About 6 months ago I discovered /r/TheRedPill. As I've mentioned in some of my previous postings, I knew that what I was reading was inherently true - I had witnessed hypergamy in action; I had seen the effectiveness of outcome independence and abundance mentality. I had witnessed women's duplicitous and deviant nature by sleeping with married women. I understood by my very own experiences that what was written in these pages was without a doubt, unequivocally, the true and real nature of women and relationships.

I absorbed the knowledge I was lacking from TRP into my game. I refined my opens both online and IRL. I got to the point where it became literally a game, one that I knew I could win if I just put in the time.

So where am I now?

I'm 26. Living very comfortably with a career I love, making great money and with my choice of who I date, who I sleep with, and how I spend my time. I've dated bartenders, club managers, strippers, good girls, sluts, and all points in between. Women have left their number on my apartment door. I've had threesomes. I've had three women tell me they love me in the last month; they are all 7s and above. And I finally hit my goals in the gym - I'm now a fairly big guy in terms of my size, 210lbs and I'm lean.

I tell you this not to brag. I tell you this because I want to show you what's honestly, truly possible. I do not believe for one second that I am smarter than any of you. I do not believe that I possess any incredible characteristic, beyond an intense drive and work ethic, that gave me such success.

I tell you this because I hope some of you can identify with my story. Identify with that feeling of hopelessness and understand that it's possible to find redemption. You can make it out. You're worth it.

There was a time when I didn't think life was worth living. I felt as though I would never be happy, I could never find love and I would never understand women. Even though so many positive things were happening in my life, I put so much emphasis on women that I felt empty inside.

I feel very differently today. Somewhere along the way, I realized that I have control over my life. Whether I have the body I want is my decision of how I choose to eat and how frequently I choose to work out. Whether I am dating someone is my decision if they are not satisfying my needs in the relationship. Who I fuck is my choice because I don't care if you leave.

This is independence. This is freedom. This is possible. And I want you to get here too.

You have to make the decision to put in the work. As you read through these pages, as you read through the sidebar and absorb the material therein, you have to decide to apply yourself. Nobody can do it for you. I promise you, there is a light at the end of the tunnel where you will find redemption and happiness and feel in control of your life for once. You just have to commit to the process.