I'm sure that you've read this by now. I'm not linking to archive because in general New York is pretty fair (read previous pieces on rape culture by Jonathan Chait for example) and I think this particular article is pretty fair. The reporter does her due diligence and is transparent about her own bias. All in all it’s a pretty entertaining read so if you haven't read I would.

Jared Rutledge is a guy like any of us. As the article says, all he did was blog the kid of shit that guys say to each other all the time. It's not meant to be taken as gospel, it's meant to be taken as expression--getting our perceptions out on the table so we can look at them. Half of the time we say that shit just to hear it said, because it’s so taboo. This is something we understand that others do not.

Unsurprisingly, Rutledge is now vilified and women are picketing his business. He's got some strange buff yoga man with a man bun screaming at him and major publications painting him as a sociopath.

He is not, of course, a sociopath or anything like it. He followed a plan and the plan got him what he wanted (just look at those yearly numbers!). He went from unhappy to happy. If he were a woman writing these stories, as countless female writers like Lena Dunham, Cheryl Strayed and Jill Soloway do and do well, he would be empowered. Objectifying the penis is just as present in female sex writing as is objectifying the vagina in male writing.

What Jared did wrong is to apologize for it. To apologize for any of it. Now he's trying to donate the proceeds of his successful business to a rape shelter and spouting psychotherapy-isms like it's his new job. "I was looking for validation,” “I struggled with relationships…” etc.

Invocation of the rape shelter could not be a worse move. He does not advocate rape. Nobody on TRP advocates rape. Nothing in the Manosphere advocates rape. By attempting to give to a rape shelter as an apology for honest stories and opinions he shared online, he is acknowledging that TRP ideas amount to rape. This is just not the case. As we all know, the definition of “rape” has become a moving target to condemn male sexuality whenever the establishment sees fit. None of Rutledge’s actions amount to anything remotely close to even the most slanted definitions of rape. That he would equate the two through his actions shows the kind of spine the guy has.

Further, by apologizing and admitting that he is a “fucked up” person, all he’s doing is giving validation to the idea that natural male sexuality is toxic. I’m sure reading some of the things he said back to himself was shocking, and being exposed like that was scary. But he reacted too quickly and wrongly. It was a knee jerk reaction to try and get everyone to like him again, to embrace the façade he had put on. But the problem is the façade itself. And when it’s removed from us, we should not cower, but rather be thankful that we’ve been revealed as ourselves.

EDITED FOR TYPOS