I’m trying to figure out how to handle myself after my wife crossed boundaries I’ve set.

For example, today she went off about me apparently not getting shorts from the washer into the dryer so the kids could go to sports practice. Honest mistake, but the reaction was over the top.

So, I basically said, “hey I’ve got stuff I’m going to do today” and let her leave, even though she wanted me to go with her. I genuinely had stuff to do and it felt good to get it done. Didn’t really feel like being around her after that. We talked on the phone a bit later and she “sort of” apologized, but I didn’t fully believe she was submitting to what I was saying, as she hammered a lot on “well, you did this thing and never apologized for it”.

A bit later I went to the gym. When she called and asked, I told her I was at the gym and she was upset that I didn’t tell her because she wanted to go, too.

I’ve grown tired of waiting around on her and her changing plans when she says she wants to go the gym, so I just said, you’ve got the freedom to prioritize and go if you want.

She wasn’t happy about that, so she hung up and drove home.

I am being avoidant and withdrawn from her, partially because I want to, partially because I was disgusted by how she was acting.

Just wondering if this is good, or if I’m missing something.

For example, maybe I should have accepted her call and “sort of” apology and just allowed her to get close to me again and given more feelz.

Just not sure though as I want to see her stop playing the games and just say “I’m sorry I acted the way I did”. Then I’d actually see her as “worthy” of my time.