Dread without looking butthurt

nastynickdr · 2017-01-23T11:48:02+00:00

1) Thats a covert contract. You expect her to do something she doesnt even know you want her to do and you get butthurt when she doesnt. Read NMMNG.

2) Dont engage via text. "We´ll talk when we get home". As for not being butthurt, what you have to do is have abundance mentality, outcome independence and give zero fucks. Work on yourself, on your projects, on your MAP. If you truly believe you can replace her in a heartbeat because you are the shit, you wouldnt worry so much about that stuff. If you believe you cant, work on becoming more attractive so you can.

GargantuaBlarg29 · 2017-01-23T13:42:59+00:00

How to be cold/dread without looking butthurt?

You are in her frame.

Scurvemuch · 2017-01-23T15:12:01+00:00

Did you ever consider telling her that you like those things?

Stop being a pussy. You can tell your girl that you like getting sexy messages from her.

Then you can work on not having a covert contract that she can read your fucking mind.

ReddJive · 2017-01-23T12:15:48+00:00

implementing trp with a lot of success in my ltr

Quit lying to yourself. It's obvious it's all going to shit because you are stuck in your own head. Your problem is you are thinking too much and not doing jack shit.

Men are disturbed not by things, but by their thoughts about them. ~Epictetus

How to be cold/dread without looking butthurt?

You don't.

Dread isn't about her. It's about you becoming a better man. Leading up to the possibility that if your relationship fails your next one won't. But thats up to you.

The reason all this is happening is because you are still writing convert contracts. You believe somewhere in your head that if you act a certain way (in this case more alpha-ish) she will act a certain way. Hate to break it to you, bubba. It doesn't work like that.

For a while yes you will be faking it until you make it. It will feel that way to you. This is why the gym, outside activities, and getting the fuck out of the house more then a little bit goes a long way.

You also need to learn to laugh in the face of it all.

Right now you can't. Get out of your head and get your shit right.

stonepimpletilists · 2017-01-23T14:21:17+00:00

Who cares how you look?

You're working on addressing it, let her worry about how she perceives it. All you gotta do, is nip bitch behaviour in the butt:

shows of frustration, hoping to get a reaction out of her
talking, as if to cathartically make a point (without thinking what it's going to accomplish)
being clear with your emotional state. She won't care.

you aren't trying to be cold, you're trying to be happy. Action follows thought. Pack a gym bad, some books, anything so you can leave the house and have fun. If you get a sexual shut down (the only reason for dread BTW) then go do those things. Leave with a smile, come back with a smile.

I don't care if you're crying inside, you leave with a smile, come back with a smile. say as little as possible (and 20% less than that).

You being cold, dour, and pissy solves nothing. don't be a faggot

2ndal · 2017-01-23T14:31:58+00:00

I don't think you really understand the concept of dread. Read the sidebar + prerequisites -- again if necessary.

JDRoedell · 2017-01-23T16:36:26+00:00

You are confusing dread with outcome independence.

GongShanks · 2017-01-23T18:19:29+00:00

Great explanation of dread

Perhaps the best post I've read on the MRP sub..

Aaren_Augustine · 2017-01-23T08:22:14+00:00

are you mad at me?

Translation - I know you're butt hurt and it doesn't make me wet.

I try to be cold or distant.

She knows. And it isn't attractive. But you have a lot of feelings for her and your anger shows her you care more than her. Which puts you below her

How to be cold/dread without looking butthurt?

It doesn't work man. I mean, she'll work just hard enough not to get fired, feed you a little pussy and go right back to the same old song and dance.

You are trying to negotiate by pouting like a child. Read No More Mr. Nice Guy and learn what a covert contract is

Read Models by Mark Manson. That will clearly list for you what women find attractive. Also the MRP sidebar.

Or continue asking around until you find an answer you want rather than become the guy she's willing to send nude pics to.

redmountainpill · 2017-01-23T08:52:48+00:00

There's no parlor trick in learning this stuff. You have to develop a busy, interesting life and invite her into it. Right now, it hurts when she doesn't show affection (why you're dating a girl who isn't enthusiastically sending you nudes is beyond me, but that's another story). If you make your body strong, have an interesting career and fun hobbies you will be so full of self-validation that you won't care.

Find out what your mission is. Until you do, you and your woman will be unsatisfied

Title	Dread without looking butthurt
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	22
Date	January 23, 2017 7:41 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/5pn7v6/dread_without_looking_butthurt/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/dread-without-looking-butthurt.206612 https://theredarchive.com/post/206612

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