37yo married 9 years , together 17 , 2 kids

The relationship has been very good for the last 5 years. Not a lot of shit tests. She’s submissive and looks to me for all the answers and decisions

Sex had been kinky and at times I can unleash her slut

So doesn’t initiate sex but will gladly open her legs most of the time when I want it. It’s not starfish but it’s low quality at times where she doesn’t put a lot of effort in. But is happy to satisfy my needs and do some grinding of her hips while we fuck

My issue as of late is the lack of quality sex and desire.

I am 6’0 170lbs business owner. Financings are stable and we have no debt or want for anything.

I go to the gym and do a lot of fuckarounditis
Lower back injury will never heal and therefore I have that issue to contend with daily.

Her smv is an 8 and I would say mine the same

She works out and does more home workouts typically when I ramp up my healthy eating and workouts I find her working out when I come back from the gym.

She was on her day off last week and we hung out and I was in a great mood came back from the gym. She was cleaning the house with music I took her in my arms and we slow danced and was playful.

We had the place to our self with the kids at school and I was setting the tone for an afternoon fuck and she knew it.

Around 2pm she sat down on the couch to read and I moved in for some light kissing and wanted the showdown to begin. Kids were coming home at 4.

She responded with a soft no. Followed by

“ ok let’s get this over with “

At that point I pulled away and said “no thanks. I’m not interested anymore”

I left the house (I’m sure I looked butthurt) and hooked up with a bro and we went to the casino for a few hands of poker (haven’t been there in years )

I came back at 5pm. She didn’t ask where I was and I continued the evening like nothing was wrong, withdrawal affection

Since then I have withdrawalled my kino (which she had always enjoyed ) and I’ve since started to just act not interested in her sexually

She’s great at receiving my attention but it always feels one sided

Should I just start my dread levels and go back to my old ways of initiating and fucking her and just start ramping up my personal improvements? Or stop all sex with her and work on myself more

I need to get more friends and find hobbies outside the house.

Owning a business and working from home doesn’t give her much time away from me to “dread”

Overall life is great. But I want her to want to fuck me. And when I tell her to climb on. She should enthusiastically. Rather than her flopping into her back and trying to pull me into her.