Question about commitment/relationships/sex - gatekeepers

nastynickdr · 2017-06-28T14:30:00+00:00

Women are the "selector" sex. They are the ones who select the mate for sex. As you may have already read/understood, an "average" woman can have sex with as many "above average" men she wants, but having commitment from an "above average" man is a completely different story. Its up to the man to accept to commit to a woman that wants to commit to him, or not.

Think about this: If you wanted to have a threesome today, what would you have to do? (not counting paying for it). Would be kinda hard, wouldnt it?

Now as a woman, if you wanted to get fucked by two guys today, what would you have to do? Just spread your legs. Log on to tinder, start talking to some guy and tell you want to fuck him and ask him to bring a friend. Heck, you could even choose his friend. Or give some friend a call. Or go to a bar.

A high value man will, among other things, value his commitment. He doesnt give it away easily. There will be lots of women competing for his commitment, but it is HARD to get. Think of Brad Pitt, how many women would like to marry him and pop his kids? What happens to something that lots of people want but few/none can get? Its value goes up.

A high value woman will, among other things, value her sex. She wont give it away easily.

The biggest "power" of a man in a relationship is his commitment. Its his hability to walk away. A woman that has snatched a man that she knows is high value and tons of other women would like to be in her place will do everything in her power to keep his commitment, which includes giving him high quality, frequent and enthusiastic sex, being a pleasant company, not nagging, among other things, thats her "maintaning the relationship". But if you are a low value man, why would she bother with that?

So one of the biggest downsides of getting married/living together/having kids is this. Your biggest power in a relationship, the power to walk away is diminished. If you are in a LTR but doesnt live together with her / not married / no kids and she starts refusing sex for whatever reason or simply being an unpleasant bitch, you can simply go "Im not interested in this anymore. Have a good life. Bye". But if you share an apartment/married/have kids its not that simple.

crimson_chris · 2017-06-28T19:16:17+00:00

It's pretty simple.

How often does a guy wait for a woman to propose? It's not the norm. So yeah, men own commitment.

How often does a woman "wait" for a guy to have sex with her? Most don't. Women own sex.

There are always outliers, but the above is the natural state.

mrpthrowa · 2017-06-28T13:21:52+00:00

Take your time reading the sidebar.

justpickanyusername · 2017-06-28T14:13:18+00:00

I sort of knew I was wasting my time commenting to you anyways. Had some time to kill.

I'm glad to see you actually do know the definition of rape. Now, reread this entire post from the beginning. Was force ever mentioned? Not until you brought up "rape".

Since I now know you do know the definition please use it appropriately when you write your sentences. We're not talking about rape.

I have better things to do now so this will be it for me here.

pikadildo · 2017-06-28T13:33:40+00:00

It's about locus of control from your perspective.

You have full control of your commitment to her.
She has full control of your access to her sex.

It's your job to interest her in sex with you, and it's her job to interest you in commitment with her.

FWIW the reverse is true, too.

She has full control of her commitment to you.
You have full control of her access to your sex.

cholomite · 2017-06-28T14:45:18+00:00

You maintain yourself, she will maintain the relationship. Women will climb through glass, work out 5 days a week, bake pies all day....etc for a man they are attracted to. In her mind, you are the relationship. You're either someone she wants a relationship with or you're not. If you're too busy trying to keep the "relationship" in good condition, you're not helping yourself, and she will lose attraction and respect for you. You are the gatekeeper of commitment in the sense that you agree to remain monogamous as long as she is doing her part to add value to your life.

Ashe225 · 2017-06-28T13:28:17+00:00

Because it's not. It's a two person's job for sex and for commitment.

Title	Question about commitment/relationships/sex - gatekeepers
Author	mrpquest
Upvotes	5
Comments	37
Date	June 28, 2017 1:09 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6k0gmi/question_about_commitmentrelationshipssex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/question-about-commitmentrelationshipssex.205935 https://theredarchive.com/post/205935

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