Never did one of these, so I'm cashing it in now.

Got an opportunity to go through wifes phone a couple of days ago. Went through the messages between her and her drug dealer friend, who I've made it clear I don't like. 95%, sure they've done something sexual. Saw a lot of stuff; flirting, drunk texting, going out behind my back, lies, him being over while I'm not home, her letting him co-babysit with her sister (who he's banging) when I explicitly stated I don't want anyone else over. I work nights, which is when most of this shit goes on. It's not the first time something like this has happened (caught her calling and texting ex a few years back), so I'm not really surprised. Did everything beta thing but leave back then because of a lack of options.

It was only a matter of time before something like this happened, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't still sting. I've been going through a lot of emotions past a couple of days, but right now, I'm floating between anger and apathy. I'm a "good husband" on paper, and everyone tells her so, and it looks like she wants to have her cake and eat it too. Well fuck that. I'm not going for that shit. It's time to lean into these stupid feelings and use them to get what I want out of life. I realize how foolish and lazy I've been over these past few months but now there's a fire inside of me that can only be quenched with actions.

I was able to take pictures of all the messages on my phone. She doesn't know I have her passcode and my OPSEC is on point. Only thing to do now is keep my stupid mouth shut and collect any evidence I come across while turning myself into a man who would walk out the door at the first sign of discovering this bullshit.

See you faggots Tuesday.