was it a test?

donmcde · 2021-04-30T17:38:23+00:00

Did you really, at no point while typing that, stop to ask you self: Does this even matter?

ur_fault · 2021-04-30T17:46:48+00:00

Just think of a shit test as a woman's attempt to find your vagina.

If you have an emotional reaction, she found it.

bluesfan16 · 2021-04-30T21:37:23+00:00

I read your posts recently and you are so far up your wife’s ass right now that you couldn’t pass her shit tests even if you recognized them. So take a deep breath slow the fuck down. The most effective thing you can do right now is focus only on the things you have complete understanding and control over. Which is why everyone keeps telling you to read, lift, and STFU. And since you’re still struggling to get a handle on what STFU even means then just focus on reading and lifting. Your wife has put up with your BP behavior for 16 years and you’re not even in a dead bedroom. So a few more months of fucking up in your traditional manner won’t really matter. However LARPing MRP tactics that you don’t understand yet could actually cause serious problems. Like the guy whose wife asked for a separation and called a lawyer two weeks ago because he misjudged a shit test and acted on it before he was ready.

For now the best use of your time and mental focus would simply be reading through other OYS's. Like they say, you are not a unique snowflake and most of the guys here have been where you currently are. There are literally hundreds of guys who have asked the exact same questions that their BP conditioned minds couldn’t comprehend in the beginning either. So go back and read their weekly posts along with all the “quit being a retarded faggot” feedback comments and you’ll eventually begin to see the patterns and gain the understanding you’re looking for. Pick a few guys that are past OYS 50 and start reading their entire history beginning with OYS 1. Because almost all of them have been where you are or worse. And they all had the same kind of questions.

On top of that you also need to know that it's going to take time. Some people say it takes a month of committed effort to undo every year someone spent being a Nice Guy pushover. So understand and accept that, short of a miracle, you will not get the marriage you want for at least a year or more. And that would only be with a committed sustained effort. That said, you actually seem to be a better place than most who first arrive at MRP. By that I mean your wife doesn’t seem completely repulsed by you (yet) so you may actually have a slightly shorter path to walk. So do yourself a favor and just start reading. Then use your OYS to gain further understanding by posting your progress and then try to internalize the feedback from people who have been exactly where you are.

wkndatbernardus · 2021-04-30T19:10:10+00:00

Too much caring what she thinks and then you let her suck you into passive aggressive "joking". I'm convinced that the best way to rule the household and become a great father is to pretend you aren't married. What would you do then? You wouldn't rely on anyone else (certainly not a woman) to take care of your domain. Do this and your wife's bitchy comments will evaporate and your household/kids/relationship will be in much better shape.

sven_igortsen · 2021-04-30T18:10:25+00:00

What is this new level of retard that I'm reading in here lately?

man_in_the_world · 2021-05-03T06:39:34+00:00

Every human interaction is a test of sorts; if your wife simply informs you she has a 4 PM meeting and won't be home until 6 and you whine like a bitch about your own job, you made it into a test and failed. A witty flirtatious repartee to a flirty comment is a win; an angry emotional outburst to a snarky tone is a loss. Tests don't always or even usually come in a separate, pure, 100% test interaction, but are often intermingled with other interactions, such as a snarky aside along with other information, or an implied criticism within a legitimate request. Given this continuum, attempts to classify every interaction as shit-test/comfort-test/not-test is ultimately kind of impossible as well as pointless, hence all the "Does it even matter?/Why do you care?" comments.

All these tests are fundamentally about testing your frame:

Shit tests assert the dominance of her frame over yours.
Comfort tests seek reassurance or clarification of her valued place within your frame.

Once you are operating wholly and congruently from your own frame, and your actions, words, and interactions always reflect that frame, your intuitive response to any type of test will not be inappropriate. This is the stage at which MRP veterans stop thinking consciously about what type of test it is and how to respond, and for that matter barely notice them.

In the end it's all about frame, so focus your efforts on developing your own frame instead of on identifying, classifying, and learning responses to the infinite variety of tests that might emerge from hers.

But the above is all beyond you right now and is for your orientation and future reference, so to answer your question...

Yes, these were (mostly) shit-tests, and you should respond to them as such.

tightsleeves · 2021-05-04T00:13:26+00:00

The real test is your weight lifting numbers?

How is it possible you can lift 140 pounds over your head (very impressive) yet deadlifting less than my wife at 205?????

When I was overhead pressing 135 pounds I was also deadlifting over 375 pounds

AlphalfaSprout · 2021-04-30T17:46:28+00:00

Watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0y5kPB9noA4&list=PL2plUMBIeP_D2snmW7md2fLfdFT_wqdXD&index=4

Have you read the following:

No More Mr Nice Guy, Robert Glover Married Man Sex Life Primer, Athol Kay When I Say No, I Feel Guilty, M. Smith

business----travel · 2021-04-30T19:44:45+00:00

You haven't mentioned any sidebar work or lifting in your post...

Stop LARPing and get to fucking work.

aarpcard · 2021-05-03T03:06:16+00:00

Lol wut?

Title	was it a test?
Author	hausofedd
Upvotes	0
Comments	27
Date	April 30, 2021 5:07 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/n1yej9/was_it_a_test/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/was-it-a-test.760012 https://theredarchive.com/post/760012

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