Did I do the right thing or did I overreact??

AnonChadThunder · 2021-02-01T04:12:39+00:00

What you know: She knew that what she was doing was wrong - and did it anyway. She was remorseful because she got caught. Not because it happened. I think you did the right thing.

________O0O________ · 2021-02-01T09:37:52+00:00

Deleting her Snapchat was the most sketchy part, whatever explanation she might have give you for that. It’s more about hiding things than allaying your fears. Your gut instinct is right. Keep following it. Stay away. Go back to abundance mentality. Talk to friends and other female friends. You’re pandering into oneitis territory.

cheesyquesadilla · 2021-02-01T04:47:53+00:00

tough situation because she did something for that long, did she acknowledge she was in the wrong? i dont think you overreacted but if it was all platonic and nonflirty/you did not find anything else/she has a lot of green flags, idk. good luck bro...

gbizzle2 · 2021-02-01T04:51:25+00:00

You did the right thing 100% but those "green flags" should actually be prerequisites.

My green flags are: She grew up with her father in her life, she respects you, she obeys you, she follows your lead, she gives you sex whenever you want it.

To me, those are green flags that many women dont have.

daproest1 · 2021-02-01T06:53:37+00:00

I think you might’ve overreacted, but there’s no way to reverse it without losing frame. She has to come to you.... with remorse.

yung_tona · 2021-02-01T14:15:18+00:00

U prolly don’t understand how snap chat works I got 100s of streaks with ppl I don’t even know

MattyAnon · 2021-02-01T16:33:44+00:00

low body count

HOW DO YOU KNOW.

The whole situation was way too suspicious for me.

I don't think this alone is a big deal. I think you're overreacting.

I don’t think she would cheat on me

With the right opportunity she would. They all wood. Give up your unicorn delusion.

I packed my shit and walked out of her place. I’ve been cheated on in a past relationship so I don’t take this stuff lightly. Did I do the right thing or did I overreact??

Overreact. There's no suggestion she's done anything wrong.

jjj2576 · 2021-02-01T04:52:31+00:00

Ball is in her court now.

Did you over react? Maybe.

Personally, I think you goofed on Leading or Vetting— you can figure out which.

Leading? When my LTR is on her phone a lot, she knows I expect some type of story or learning talk— if we are on our phones, it better be for something of value. Maybe we are looking at period dresses for a new sex role play? Maybe we are researching things to buy our rats? Maybe we are googling butt stuff? Maybe we are looking at how to make better short ribs? Regardless, we know we both need to demonstrate value.

Vetting? You can figure out what you want and how to find it— I ain’t your daddy.

dolmino91 · 2021-02-01T10:30:03+00:00

62 day snap streak

What is this kid on about, is this 62 days without a blowup?? This generation is weird.

SteveSan82 · 2021-02-01T12:24:05+00:00

Why the fuck would you tell her you looked through her phone? Now ahe will remove anything incriminating and buy a 2nd phone.

Why do you even have an LTR? downgrade her to a plate. Stop being a Oneitis cuck.

4everrekt · 2021-02-01T15:23:52+00:00

If it crossed a boundary for you, you did what you thought was appropriate.

That being said, if your gf is attractive, it’s guaranteed that she will have multiple orbiters. If you’re willing to fill the role that those orbiters play, such that she doesn’t need/want them, have at it.

btt069 · 2021-02-01T04:09:54+00:00

so you packed your bag and moved on. You felt disrespectful even though you didnt have any clear evidences.

This proves you practice Abundance Mentality.

Good Job. now dont be anxious about it.

its past. focus on present. you took the decision already. though she might want you to come back.

but you made her your ex for a reason.

Thats it. dont overthink. you have taken the decision already. good luck now.

Noodlesoupe2 · 2021-02-01T07:32:57+00:00

I wouldn’t worry about it girls have streaks with a lot of people and usually it’s just blank screens. If she has streaks with a lot of people I wouldn’t break up yet but if he’s one of her best friends I would be suspicious. The fact that there were platonic messages for the most part is good and I would trust her until she gives you a good reason not to

Herdsengineers · 2021-02-01T15:24:33+00:00

She might not have been flirty or anything but she showed she's got the propensity to be sneaky and do something that anyone would find questionable. And keep doing it and try to hide it. That means when she wants something that will be bad for the relationship, she'll go do it and try to hide it. Think of it in these terms - 3 years from now you're married and find out she's been secretly running up debt because she wanted to spend on frivolous stuff and hid it from you. All the sudden that house you thought were about to get you can forget about because instead your saddled with debt you didn't know about. There are a million other scenarios. It comes down to she will hide things when it suits her even if it's potentially to the detriment of her relationship.

As for deleting snap, you can look through phone, etc. - why would you want to? Why not go find a new woman that you don't have to do that with to verify she's not pulling some crap while wonder does she have a burner somewhere or something?

Personally, I dunno if I'd have hard nexted right then, maybe downgrade her to plate, but you absolutely have reason to if you choose to over this. I wouldn't stay LTR'd up with someone that I has to worry about like this.

pukima_sial · 2021-02-01T12:24:04+00:00

Could've set the boundaries after she deleted the Snapchat but you did overreact by walking out.
Don't text or call her back or say some sorry shit. Wait for her text/call. See if she still have some interests in you.

OneTrueQ · 2021-02-01T13:14:42+00:00

Women are snapchat professionals its so easy to delete scandalous messaging on that damned app. I think she obviously knows his questionable character and doesn’t care. She knows that giving him her attention creates some sort of leverage at least, and at most if he is an objectively attractive guy he really might not just be an orbiter, he could be someone to easily cheat with or the next in line. Consult how much respect she has for her best friend. Also as men we notice bad vibes/fraudulence, believe yourself and own your truth. I wouldn’t trust her. What worthwhile, classy woman feels the need to keep in close contact with her best friends man like that?

I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt because I’ve noticed similar situations in life and I think you are reading in between the lines of some things you haven’t mentioned like in-person vibes and interactions.

kncrew · 2021-02-01T14:35:04+00:00

I’d understand if it was like two weeks. That’s about the interest I have in talking with old platonic girls from back home.

KirthWGersen · 2021-02-01T12:31:29+00:00

So you have problems with your girlfriend talking to other men in a non-flirty way. If that really is how you see life, your actions were coherent.

Personally, I don't have a problem with other men talking to women I am with and I think the way you reacted looks extremely insecure and a huge overreaction. But again, if you really are that insecure, maybe you did the right thing to protect your feelings.

If she ever gets back with you, or you go out with someone who knows her, they will now know that they can easily manipulate you through petty jealousy.

Kuneyah · 2021-02-01T19:34:08+00:00

Idk man honestly I agree with you I personally would've done the same super sketch.

iossiPP · 2021-02-01T14:55:05+00:00

This stopped being red pill it seems. You are one the most insecure ‘men’ over here. Alpha my ass 🤣

back_into_the_pile · 2021-02-01T13:24:20+00:00

A huge part of me wants to understand the dirty details but your best bet is to treat her like the whore she is and move on king

Title	Did I do the right thing or did I overreact??
Author	Prodigy999
Upvotes	26
Comments	59
Date	February 1, 2021 3:59 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/l9u7np/did_i_do_the_right_thing_or_did_i_overreact/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/did-i-do-the-right-thing-or-did-i-overreact.740699 https://theredarchive.com/post/740699

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