Girl halfway cancels through text

fnordsnord · 2015-06-19T17:24:15+00:00

Do not go. Find something else to do. Sure, say, "OK."

But if she pops up later saying "I feel better," say, "I'm glad you feel better, but I'm busy."

Other than that, go radio silent. If she isn't interested enough in you to contact you after flaking for "a headache," she's not worth your time.

Odds are, her headache has a name, and it's Chad Thundercock, who got a higher SMV than you.

abdada · 2015-06-19T15:00:38+00:00

Seriously don't sweat it. Don't chase anyone for anyone reason.

Don't even respond. She didn't ask you a question therefore she gets no response. I only respond to questions asked.

Follow up in a week if you care. I wouldn't

becoming_pertinax · 2015-06-19T16:15:10+00:00

Say "ok, hope you feel better" and then proceed with your day. Just go do something fun.

You can't know if she's telling the truth or not, but it's at least possible.

If she texts you later today and says "Hey, I feel great!" then she was probably telling the truth. You can either go through with your original plans, or invite her to join you at whatever you're doing at the time, or reschedule, or ignore her, or whatever you want.

If she texts you later today and says "Sorry, I still feel horrible" then you can decide where to go from there. If she suggests a different time then it was probably legit. Otherwise she's likely just flaking out.

If she doesn't contact you for a couple of days then I would assume she just flaked out and move on.

life_manager · 2015-06-19T16:41:02+00:00

Just reply "ok" and cut communications. You have abundance mentality. Try to get another date set up, that way, best case scenario, she texts you back later and says "I'm free!" you can say you're busy and she'll feel like she missed out.

RPAlternate42 · 2015-06-19T22:05:54+00:00

Answers are for questions. Everything else is extraneous.

Not replying (to the non-question) is the answer.

SexistFlyingPig · 2015-06-19T20:35:34+00:00

Outcome independence.

I had someone from OKC texting me, when I suggested we meet up, she suddenly had a broken phone. She emailed me saying she was having phone problems, and when I replied, suggesting we meet up, she didn't reply. I get a text a couple days later from her saying her phone was repaired. I replied "You ghosted on me." She then said, "Yeah, sorry about that."

I haven't written her since, nor do I intend to.

Red_Invictus · 2015-06-19T16:42:30+00:00

"Alright, feel better", and then go radio silent and let her come to you. Or she doesn't, and that doesn't matter, you next her.

itsnadya101 · 2015-06-19T15:32:34+00:00

She's not that into you. next.

wanderer779 · 2015-06-19T17:29:50+00:00

I noticed that she did not apologize, unless you left that out. When you have a date with someone and you cancel, you should apologize for not being able to make it. I think you'd be totally justified in deciding that she does not have good manners and therefore isn't worth messing with.

So I would just not respond. If she texts back today saying she can in fact make it tonight, say sorry I made other plans, even if your plan is to grill yourself a steak and watch the game by yourself. If you would like to give her another shot, set another date and see how she responds.

redpillpussy · 2015-06-19T14:54:29+00:00

This could be a couple of things...

1) She has better plans, possibly with Chad.
2) She's presenting herself in a dishonest way.
3) She is too nervous to meet up. (not likely)

I'd go minimalistic. No answer, "ok", "sure, np". Recontact in a few days immediately go to logistics, and give up if she flakes again.

bananabreadmuffins · 2015-06-19T15:33:12+00:00

Just don't text back lol and take a different girl out.

*abundance mentality

blacwidonsfw · 2015-06-19T16:52:54+00:00

"Fosho"

RemyPrice · 2015-06-19T15:24:08+00:00

Just write "Feel better" and ~~soft next, then~~ circle back in a few days with "Let's reschedule - 5PM tomorrow."

Authority8 · 2015-06-19T15:15:23+00:00

I'm not sure how to handle it either. This has happened to me. I see two solutions:

Just say ok, lower case, simple, detached
Tell her you need to know by X time. 1 hour from now is probably good. That implies you have something else to do and you arent willing to wait on her.

I've done both before. Both sometimes work and sometimes don't. I don't think it matters which you do.

kingofpoplives · 2015-06-19T15:49:36+00:00

The type of thing is so annoying...

So how does one handle this, is a simple "OK" a good enough answer to something like this?

The only issue with "ok" is that it allows her to leave you hanging for hours, then decide not to come out at the last minute when it's too late for you to figure out something else to do.

I would press her to make a decision immediately, that way at least you can do something else with your night if she decides to bail and won't be staring anxiously at your phone waiting to hear from her.

Say something like "what do you think the odds are you'll make it out tonight?". If she says the odds are very bad, then just say you're gonna do something else.

A lot of times when you do this, the girl will decide she will be OK after her nap and commit to coming out right then.

This type of thing is actually a power play on her part. She is taking your whole night hostage with her "headache" excuse. It's a lot better to cancel right now than be at her mercy while you're waiting around.

Title	Girl halfway cancels through text
Author	Hammoch
Upvotes	13
Comments	41
Date	June 19, 2015 2:49 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3aeoyc/girl_halfway_cancels_through_text/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/girl-halfway-cancels-through-text.150247 https://theredarchive.com/post/150247

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