How do I make friends?

Simptopimp-co-uk · 2020-09-06T13:33:04+00:00

Forget the 'just join a club bro' advice. Anyone who joins a martial arts or gym trying to make real friends will be looked at as cringe. That's where you go to train and maybe build training partners over months but often not more than that.

The real secret to making friends is becoming the initiator.

You're boring, you're hoping a fun guy approaches you and invites you into the fun.

Guess what? So is everyone else.

Become that fun guy who approaches people and invites them into the fun.

Have some fun event planned even as simple as a drink and watching a particular movie, baking brownies, whatever. Have something planned for every weekend that you are going to do with or without anyone else.

Now go and approach cool looking bros and invite them to join you, watch how literally every single person you do this to light up and they look so happy, because we're all waiting for the fun guy to approach us and invite us into the fun.

Become the initiator, you'll never look back. But that means you have to provide value to others, namely something fun to do on Friday especially whilst other places are closed.

my shitty article on this

DANTE214FIRE · 2020-09-06T08:42:39+00:00

I think it’s going to very hard in quarantine. But out of quarantine is the question I can answer. Okay, question how did you make friends in middle school and high school? I’ll tell you what I did or well what I do.I scout them out kinda see if they are the type of person I want to be friends with I do this for like a minute. Then I just approach them and say hi just like you would with a women. I figure out if we have the same hobbies and boom we can talk out said hobbies and have fun. That’s what I hope it helps

kncrew · 2020-09-06T12:40:11+00:00

If you can, try getting a motorcycle. I live in a large city compared to what you described, but last weekend I parked next to some other bikes at a gas station and they asked me if I wanted to go to the restaurant they were going to. I said yes, and they had a group of 25 people that would text back and forth if they were going out to ride. That now can take up a few hours of my week doing that.

There is almost 0 effort needed to meet people who ride motorcycles, everyone assumes you're cool!

maubreetius · 2020-09-06T09:19:23+00:00

Why don't you just hit up your old friends

tippytoes2020 · 2020-09-06T13:23:10+00:00

Check out Dr. Jack Schaer; he’s an ex FBI agent and this sort of thing is his specialty; lots of free content with him on youtube

PIGamer86 · 2020-09-06T10:27:33+00:00

Sup bro?

rabmcm32 · 2020-09-06T12:41:04+00:00

Join a dojo.

aeiou69 · 2020-09-06T09:15:06+00:00

Join clubs. One to keep you in shape, the other to keep you creative, one to keep you intelligent and so on.

For example, for keeping you in shape club go to mma or boxing. This is so much better than going to the fucking gym. The gym is overrated as shit, if you ask me. 1) It’s extremely hard to make friends just in the gym. Everyone in focused on themselves. You might get a workout buddy but it’s super rare and 2) Yes, it keeps you in shape and raises your SMV, which is awesome, but you don’t get the ability to be able to defend yourself. Having a shit ton of muscles and not being able to fight is like having a Lamborghini with an engine of a Honda Civic, yes it looks cool, but in reality it’s trash. And remember, muscles do not equal strength. If you go to boxing 4 days a weeks for a year you’ll be able to beat the shit out of the scariest and mean looking guy in the gym, even if he weights 50 lbs more than you. What are you going to do if you’re walking with a girl and real bandits and thugs attack you?

For keeping you creative club go to something like music lessons. Learn the guitar or something like that.

For keeping you intelligent club go to programming or a place where people learn a language.

You obviously don’t have to join like 10 clubs, but 1-3 should be amazing.

When you do this, making friends will become inevitable. Hope this helped

2020-09-06T13:01:15+00:00

I think once you start back at school you will have a bit more luck college and university are probably the easiest place to meet like minded people. Otherwise it is extremely difficult. Most people have their social circles and breaking in is pretty hard as its really up to a person to let you in. There are some really nice people out there that invite new people all the time.

You will have to be pretty forward with people you want to hang out with. I generally have been quite passive in the past with a lot of people in my dance class. I was a bit annoyed that I found out that theyd just all decided to go rock climbing together. Im slowly breaking into that social circle though.

Just do hobbies and do your school work and just keep talking to people. Its a really good skill to be able to go talk to anyone.

pyth0ns · 2020-09-06T14:16:12+00:00

Where you located? (Legit)

The best way to make friends... Don't put pressure on yourself to make friends. Be natural man.

Wherever you're at (gym, curricular activities, etc.) Be social and strike up a conversation.

Dependant where you are and if things are open ask if they're watching the UFC on Sat night and go out for it. (Things like that)

If they aren't interested... Don't let it affect you.

Key is - be social and don't be afraid to ask people to hang out.

burn-all-bridges · 2020-09-06T18:02:22+00:00

Be interested, not interesting.

WearyDimension · 2020-09-06T18:26:20+00:00

When shit calms down, join a D2D firm. Put your heart into that shit and grind out talking to 100+ people a day trying to sell them, and after 6-12 weeks you'll never struggle to make friends again.

thetotalpackage7 · 2020-09-06T19:04:33+00:00

Get a job. Co-workers can be great friends. Move into an apartment with a pool that people sit around. Bring some beers, share them, ask what people are up to that weekend.

ronsoness · 2020-09-06T21:51:58+00:00

I'm going to add an important note: certain people in certain situations are more receptive to making friends. I moved to a new city last year and wondered why I didn't have a fun social life like past cities I've worked in. The answer: previous times, there would usually be an onboarding/training with other people new to the city and we'd all go out, hang out, drink, get to know each other, and explore together. That's b/c we lower our guard in new cities and spaces and we're all hyped by the new-ness of everything. Once we have a clique, those guards come back up. And if we're talking about befriending locals, that's even more unlikely, because they have their long time relationships and don't want to make time for someone transient or new to the city. If you've watched the movie, "Lost in Translation", where 2 lonely foreigners become friends in Japan, when they'd not be friends at all back in America, that's exactly what I'm referring to. TLDR: look for people new to the city to make friends with -- you can help them acclimate and they're much more likely to be open to making new friends

Title	How do I make friends?
Author	Ruueeee
Upvotes	99
Comments	57
Date	September 6, 2020 8:21 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/inih1e/how_do_i_make_friends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-make-friends.173784 https://theredarchive.com/post/173784

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