Like many of you, I am eternally grateful that I found this place. I’m still pretty much a newbie and often find myself backsliding, which may be evident from the below post. I’ll try to keep it short.

This is me. I’m 30, I have a great job, I make $200k a year nett, have been lifting properly for about a year and am in great shape (10% BF). Oh, and what’s more, I am Beta. Still so frustratingly fucking Beta. Not as Beta as I used to be mind you, but I do things and say things all the time, that when I analyze them afterwards, I feel like putting my head in a microwave.

A year ago I was married. My now ex-wife was a HB9. She ended up fucking one of my best friends at the time. That’s a story for another post, but it would serve as a perfect fucking case study on why you should thank whichever deity you pray to for finding TRP.

Now, a year later, after much self-improvement and deep introspection, I meet HB8. She’s fun, she’s beautiful and she’s sweet. She also has multiple red flags. RF 1: Major Daddy issues RF 2: She tells me in passing that she’s glad she met me because everyone at work will finally stop thinking she’s sleeping with her boss (call him Boss 1). giggle RF 3: She is way too sexually generous. I mean she cannot get enough sex and she is spectacular in bed. RF 4: She 29 and never been married.

There are others, but you get the point.

So I enjoy my time with this girl, the sex is phenomenal. I pay for most dinners (which to be fair isn’t exactly a burden) but she will take me out and every so often and pay for everything. She is very into me. There are no real shit-tests to speak of. She’ll pretty much go along with what I say without much argument and she doesn’t get jealous or nag.

We’re out last week and end up at one of her boss’ houses (not Boss 1, we’ll call this one Boss 2). We’re both pretty drunk and I hear her on the phone. Boss 1 has called her to talk about his impending breakup with his girlfriend. Boss 1 does this at times, he’ll call her and sob about some or other relationship problem. Deep down it irks me a little (yes I know), but I don’t let on and always try to hold frame. This time however I ask her calmly what’s up with him doing that. Long story short, she confesses that when they first met (also about a year ago) she had hooked up with him and they slept together. I also know that after we had started sleeping together, she had gone on a long weekend trip with some of her colleagues, him being one. Again, I try hold frame, but in truth I’m pissed (yes I know). Right then, as if on cue Boss 1 walks into the party. He comes up to us and puts out his hand to greet me. I shake his hand and say that I’m glad to finally meet him and that I’ve heard so much. In truth the sarcasm was pretty blatant on my part. *Before you jump in, I realize how Beta that was. I’m really pissed at myself for not managing that better. I get up pretty calmly, walk to the host (Boss 2), thank him for his hospitality and walk out. She obviously chases after me. I tell he that I don’t do so well when people lie to me. That I don’t care about her past but she’s obviously obfuscated the facts for a reason.

Here we are now. Her begging for forgiveness. Me knowing full well that AWALT and that this is just my turn. Do I pull the plug now for being disrespected, or do I just downgrade her and carry on having amazing sex until she fucks up and end it then?