Someone help me understand what just happened?

BestSC86 · 2017-09-27T03:55:46+00:00

Something is missing....

She isn't just ghosting you...she is pissed about something or how you acted. That is in no way normal for a girl to act even if she doesn't like or does not walk to have a 2nd date. She hates your ass for going to such extremes. Are you leaving some things out?

The only other possible explanation is that she has a BF and either one of his friends or their friends saw her on the date....and now she is in full hamster mode to erase the evidence completely from the world.

So the options are that you were a creepy, horrible date or she has a BF and got caught cheating.

max_peenor · 2017-09-27T04:05:40+00:00

This a red pill throwaway. SpanishHeat

That's called doing it right.

Dave and Busters

Er.. That's the sort of place that older retards get drunk and try to fuck their secretaries. Speaking from experience here.

18 year old

She decided not to be a slut yet. She played the game, stepped the steps and will ultimately want to do it. She just isn't ready to make the dive.

She is dealing with her shit. This ultimately has nothing to do with you. This is why 19 has long been my ultimate floor with women.

(FYI, if she was 22, I'd say she got a booty call and was off for other dick.)

TheEndlessRoadAhead · 2017-09-27T04:06:24+00:00

Maybe she really hates dogs?

Mr-Ed209 · 2017-09-27T08:59:19+00:00

She freaked out because of nerves and ASD.

Once she'd made that turn she realised how awkward she'd made things. Because she's 18 (and a woman) she thought it would just be best to delete you from everything to avoid any back lash and face consequences for her actions.

Hard next and move on.

SocietalEngineering · 2017-09-27T14:03:55+00:00

Lmfaooo thank you for posting this, made me crack up.

This is a classic case of a girl just getting nervous. That's literally it.

Women get weak and afraid sometimes, like anyone else, and often it has nothing to do with you.

dr_warlock · 2017-09-27T16:51:55+00:00

When a girl ghosts you, the why doesnt matter. Not interested, has problems but not yours to solve, doesnt matter. Next.

You can ponder it at home but dont reveal this through your actions.

1Pink1Stink · 2017-09-27T03:32:57+00:00

You did way too much to try to reach her. You should have stopped after you first called her. Why would you wish her a good night?

Let me ask you, did you pay for this date?

willowhawk · 2017-09-27T09:34:41+00:00

Two reasons it could be

Once out the bright loud lights of the arcade and on a calm walk back her emotional state changed. Leading her to not want to have sex. If she's walking back over thinking how not to have sex she probably panicked herself into doing something stupid.
reanalyze the convo you had walking back, clearly you did not calibrate to how she was feeling in the walk and adjust how you spoke in person

Final point, I know it's hard and it came as a surprise but you should have called once and that's it. Her seeing one missed call is alot better than three and a gay message. One missed call let's her come back to you in the future. Three calls and message kills any attraction she had left

Zack9764 · 2017-09-27T16:53:07+00:00

People said you're overly obsessed calling her and stuff but not really. It was good to check if she's safe or not because that was pretty odd. Obviously she was though and is just weird or has some issues. Who knows maybe she was going to bait you into something like std or pregnancy scare and aborted at the last second, realized she couldnt do it to you so blocked you. Also it could be possible she was cheating?

FlyingSexistPig · 2017-09-27T22:27:45+00:00

This is classic last minute resistance. The moment you weren't there with her, her tingles faded and she thought about what she was about to do. She texted her girlfriends and ... the moment was gone.

Your take from this? Your game is good, but you need to learn to close. Better luck next time.

notmyusualreddit · 2017-09-27T09:55:42+00:00

Why did someone have a random weird action? Who knows.

However, once she did it, I wouldn't have sent the message that wished her a good night after she pulls something as weird as that. Probably the BEST thing to do is nothing and let her message you her own psycho babble and then go from there.

BUT, because I'm not perfect either I would have probably sent her "Don't do that next time." (note, dont say ever again) It implies there will be a next date automatically. Ive said stuff like that when women have messed up slightly before and it's worked for me because it lets them know you are aware and don't like it, and are drawing some kind of line, but still gives them an in. Plus, you arent making them explain it. (whats the point of an explanation when its bs lies and hamster spinning anyway)

7Fig · 2017-09-27T18:04:31+00:00

You handled it fine until you got home and used every other method you could to contact her.

Now you look desperate.

On to the next.

Slolum · 2017-09-27T20:50:04+00:00

I fucked up two excellent dates myself. You're missing something. Go back and think about what happened at the Arcade before you drove home.

One of them was a HB8 that I'd been crushing since high school. I kept it cool most of the night. We ended up making out. On the way back to my place I drunkenly mentioned that I'd had a crush on her since high school. I placed too much value on her and she last minute decided it wasn't a good idea for us to drunkenly hook up. The next morning she decided the whole night had been a mistake (she was close friends with my ex). I shoulda kept my mouth shut and I woulda fucked her that night. She could have hampstered it away the next morning as a drunken mistake we'll never tell my ex about.

The other was even worse. HB9 was in my bed (I know 10s don't exist but fuck if I didn't think they did at that moment.) She was a personal trainer and fitness model. We had an awesome date. I take her back to my place and within moments I've lifted her up against the wall and we're aggressively making out. I carry her to my bed and we fool around. Her pants are off. Then she sits up and tells me "just so you know I don't sleep with guys on the first date, so we can't have sex." I know now that this was Last Minute Resistance and Slut Defense. At the time I thought I needed to respect her. I also said some really dumb shit about how I couldn't believe that she was both hot and cool (she really was fun to talk to). We agreed on a second date time and location before she left but she ended up canceling and a second date never appeared.

So my bet is you screwed up right near the end. It's easy to do, and it should be a lesson learned.

Frankly, even letting her drive home alone was a mistake. You shoulda had an excuse why she had to come with you in your car. Doesn't even have to make sense. Women will pretend it does to act like they don't know they're going to your place to get fucked.

mksu · 2017-09-27T23:51:04+00:00

That's just a logistics fail on your part, you should have gone in the same car, you know, because of the implication.

Peter_B_Long · 2017-09-27T23:59:50+00:00

Maybe she didn't like the part of town that you lived in.

Fulp_Piction · 2017-09-27T16:17:17+00:00

Who payed for the date?

Fulp_Piction · 2017-09-27T16:17:25+00:00

Who payed for the date?

stephcurrythrowaway · 2017-09-27T16:56:39+00:00

You should maybe both go in the same car next time. Or better yet get a hotel near by if it ain't far

Other than that move on. I get it. She was hot and you really wanted to bang but don't worry. She'll come around

TrenGod37 · 2017-09-27T18:09:57+00:00

Something is not adding up. Even with all the suggestions on here it’s very very odd for her to be making out with you. Agree to come back. Not only that. SUGGEST there’s time to do something else. And then block you and ghost you on the way home

The only thing that would make any sense at all. I think someone said above would be the boyfriend thing. Very odd. Update us if you ever find out.

Until then don’t sweat it. Move on

cmiovino · 2017-09-27T18:36:43+00:00

Had this happen before, but with more time investment.

"Dating" (plating?) a girl for about 2 months. Hung out nearly every weekend, slept together multiple times, yadda yadda. Even had her sending provocative pictures and asking for me to come over constantly. It was one of the first times I had a girl chasing me REALLY hard.

Went to a concert one night, came back, nothing seemed up. Next day I just noticed something we were tagged in on Facebook was removed. She was totally gone from FB. Sent a normal text about something and no response. Waited another day or two, logged on another FB account I had at the time, she was there but had this other dude in many recent pictures. Found out I was blocked on FB and via phone for zero reason.

I later found out that she was apparently seeing someone else at the time and basically chose him over me. I will admit, 2 months in, I was catching feelings and thinking it was going to go into an LTR. In fact, she probably wanted that with me, but 'Chad' in her eyes came along and scooped her up. I'd suspect she could sense I was catching feelings as all before that I was super abundant and going out to meet other girls. Like a sixth sense, she just peaced out.

I ran into her later in person randomly and she was genuinely remorseful for blocking me. Remorseful for choosing the other guy over me? Hell no, but I said it was "rather childish" and she should have just been straight up. A day later, she texted me a long drawn out story about how we didn't have enough in common and all that jazz. Really, she just felt dude B was a better mating option for whatever reason - most likely because he was a foreigner from Ireland who liked school and art and I was a domestic business guy looking to get ahead. We were totally different.

Anyways, advice time: Just move on as you are. She probably got back in her car, got cold feet, and bailed out thinking her friends or parents would find out. She blocked you because she didn't want to face you again.

GreenPiller · 2017-09-27T03:29:19+00:00

Upvoted this cause it happened to me once. My biggest guess was that she didn't like me enough or she was on the rag and didn't tell me. Still, going cold turkey just like that was fucked up. Hopefully somebody can answer this one.

MattyAnon · 2017-09-27T17:23:05+00:00

Women can change their mind at any time

True, and this is a good mentality, but this is odd.

What happened is she decided not to have sex with you, and acted in a weird/low conflict way to get this. That's not unusual, but something doesn't quite add up here.

I suggest she comes over to hang out and meet my dog and she agrees. I kiss her before we leave and she reciprocates just fine.

Looks good, although kissing isn't the "sealing the deal" you imagine it to be.

I dunno. This is a weird one. Sounds like a good date. She knows your place means sex. A false time disqualifier can help "meet my dog for ten minutes, but I need an early night".

But.... it's a woman. Who the fuck knows. Could be fucking anything. As you say - abundance mentality.

Title	Someone help me understand what just happened?
Author	SpanishHeat
Upvotes	31
Comments	66
Date	September 27, 2017 3:17 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/72pn1l/someone_help_me_understand_what_just_happened/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/someone-help-me-understand-what-just-happened.501 https://theredarchive.com/post/501

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