Giving it’s around the time of year where people are starting to think about what you should be doing to improve yourself more into 2018. The combination of certain levels of these 4 following things are ultimately what sets you apart from other guys. And instead of chasing around women you will find yourself in a position where they will be chasing you more often than not once those 4 things are in a good spot. Looks, Relationship to yourself, Game/Social skills, Status.

Your looks

There are some key things here that you must be focused on moving into 2018. Some people say looks don’t matter but they certainly do, or at the very least they make things much easier. So let's forget about the things we can’t fix and focus on what we can.

Start working out

I honestly don’t want to read any excuses in the comment section in regards to this at the very least you should be committed to giving 3-4 hours a week (~3% of your week) back into yourself to lift or run or be active in some way shape or form. This goes for all age brackets reading this subreddit.

Check out the following for more information on working out:

1. https://www.bodybuilding.com/ for workout plans
2. /r/naturalbodybuilding for workout plans
3. /r/bodyweightfitness if you can’t access/afford a gym
4. /r/running if you can’t access/afford a gym
   These are all great resources where you can find more information on these topics

Tighten up your diet

This goes hand in hand with working out. I’m not telling you to count macros or anything here because to get the ideal attractive body of a male you don’t really need to do that, although it can certainly accelerate the process. And let’s be honest, most of us here like to go out and drink have a couple of beers or eat some pizza every once and awhile. I’m telling you to make simple, smart decisions when it comes to food. Small noticeable improvements over a period of time. That soda you were having at lunch, turn it into water. That coffee with cream + sugar you have in the morning, make it black. Instead of getting a cheese burger and fries for lunch make it a grilled chicken sandwich with vegetables as your side. Over time these healthier choices will end up positively impacting your life and then you can curate it even more and get even more healthy as we go on.

Links to help you with your diet and eating habits:

1. /r/intermittentfasting/
2. /r/ketogains/ I have friends who have had great success committing to keto diet
3. https://www.bodybuilding.com/content/meal-plan-for-every-guy.html doesn't have to be exactly this but something similar would be good. The more important take away would be the foods they are showing you should eat

Fix your style

There a simple things you can do style wise to stand out in comparison to other people. Simple things like getting a haircut + well fitted clothing will make the world of difference. Take today’s fashion trends and add your own personal flare to it as well. Here are some resources to help with with style.

Finding your style:

Pinterest - Mostly used by females but I really like going to it and looking at it from a fashion/looks perspective. Look at different pins in regards to male fashion and find outfits you think you would like then try to recreate that outfit using the links provided there or by shopping on cheaper clothes websites if your on a budget.

https://www.gq.com/ I’m sure y’all have heard of this place before. Find outfits you like and try to recreate them yourself

Balling on a budget:

1. /r/frugalmalefashion
2. https://www.amazon.com/
3. https://factory.jcrew.com (online or instore)
4. https://www.nordstromrack.com (online or instore)

Relationship to yourself

This is probably the most important thing when it comes to life in general. Before you can have a good relationship with anyone male or female, you must first learn to love yourself. You will also have a hard time being empathetic until you understand your own emotions and why they are happening Once you love yourself and have confidence it will shine through into every other area of your life. Here’s my suggestions into improving your relationship with yourself

Start writing

You should be aiming to get into a habit of writing things down. Getting your thoughts out of your mind and onto a physical plane will allow you to look at them from a more logical perspective. This will help you learn about yourself and why you think/feel certain things and decide for yourself whether or not it would be good to relate to or keep having those thoughts even more. It also allows you to learn about what makes you happy/unhappy exc. And learn about yourself from that sense as well. Here are some resources to help you get started with this idea of journaling/writing. I keep most of my journaling/writing organized in google drive

https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/jumpstart-journaling-habit-7-simple-templates/

I am also plugging a comment I saw in another thread in regards to writing that I have personally tried and have liked myself. Credit to /u/1399element

Write 3 pages of stream of conscious writing every day, don't censor what you write. If you write "I feel like killing my whole family and friends and spitting on their graves" don't censor it let if flow. Also, don't re-read the pages. You'll find that the first two weeks you will be writing "I don't know what to write" and then after about the 2nd week mark you will start going into deep topics. I've been doing these pages for two years, it changed my life.

Start meditating and learning to make the most of the present moment

There’s not much to go into here. Learning to make the most of what you have now will help you stay focused and be more content with what’s going on around you since you will be looking to make the most of the situations you are put into. Some suggestions to help learn more about these things:

1. Try the free trial of headspace (app) https://www.headspace.com/
2. Read “The power of now” https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6708.The_Power_of_Now
3. Read “Meditations” https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30659.Meditations
4. /r/mindfulness
5. /r/stoicism

Social Skills and Game

IMO game ultimately boils down to two things. The first and most important thing is social skills. Social skills embody a lot of things but the two most important things are being able to read body language as well as being able to talk to and make genuine connections with people. Then the second thing is experience. Understanding how to relate and make genuine connections with people. Being able to watch things like their body language and then physically escalate at the right time. Or being able to handle an objection or shit test in a smooth fashion all comes from experience. You should be talking to everyone around you just being a generally friendly person. It really doesn’t take more than holding eye contact and saying hello to begin. Start there and then challenge yourself to push even further in your interactions. Here are my suggestions on things you should be looking into to help improve yourself in these regards as we move into the new year.

Good reads:

1. https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4seyc9/never_run_out_of_things_to_say_to_womenkeep_the/
2. "What every body is saying" - Joe Navaro https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1173576.What_Every_Body_is_Saying
3. How to win friends and influence people - Dale Carnegie https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4865.How_to_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People
4. Models - Mark Manson https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/12633800-models?from_search=true

Remember to put what you read into practice. Nothing is going to be more powerful than experience at the end of the day.

Status

Now this one is the trickiest to write a “guide” on. But it does build on top of these three things I mentioned above. Status can be shown or displayed in a variety of ways and can be shown through a few key things. Environment, people, money, hobbies.

Environment example

The tattooed bartender at a high profile bar/night club is going to be high status to the 23 year old post grad sorority girl when she’s out on the town with her friends one night. Where as the in-shape yoga instructor teaching her hot yoga class would be high status to her in that environment. So in this environment example you want to either be the bartender or yoga instructor OR more likely be friends with them. That way you get that “status” through social proof of being friends with them.

Understand your environment and put yourself in the best situation to succeed. This comes through experience and practice and having a general social awareness.

People example

Surround yourself with other high value people. If I go out to the bar with my 3 friends from back home who don’t have jobs and have put on some weight since college ended. My perceived value will be lower than if I go out to the bar with one of my girlfriends and four of her friends. So do your best to surround yourself with other high value people who you also enjoy being around. Once again environment is important here again.These all kind of link together. A real life example that I can give from my life at the importance of status and people would be being in a good fraternity in college and seeing my friends have access to a ton of hot girls during school. To now struggling because they are working 9-5 cube jobs where they are once again kind of like a “freshman” again and need to build up their status. They also are not surrounded by other perceived high value males anymore.

Offer something other people can’t/won’t to other high value people.If you have the ability to make friends with powerful social people in your area/demographic. If you’re in college join a good fraternity. If you’re new to an area start leveraging your social skills to make friends. Invite them to things and add some sort of value to their life somehow. When you get to interact with a high status person do your best to make a good first impression and become friends with them.

Money example

Having money like having good looks makes things much easier. An example would be if you have the money to buy a table at a club your perceived value compared to the general admission people will be higher. Money also opens up doors to do more cool shit such a traveling, pursuing cool hobbies, classes to learn new things, exc. If you don’t have money make friends with people who do. Once again, not always necessary but ALWAYS nice to have.

Hard to give specific advice here

Hobbies example

Having hobbies that you are passionate about and immerse yourself fully into help make you an interesting person. And usually being an interesting person helps contribute to your status as you can connect and meet a lot of people through that hobby or common interest. As well as have good stories about said hobby. Traveling, photography, cooking, skiing, snowboarding, surfing, sports, fighting exc. Some hobbies in my opinion are probably better when attracting the opposite sex but only do things because you are interested in doing them and love doing it for yourself. Anything else for any other reason would be needy

If you have the means get yourself out there and try new things. Instead of watching 2 hours of netflix go take a kickboxing or photography class. This new way of thinking and pushing yourself to learn and put yourself out there is challenging at first buy when you are pushing yourself more and more you’ll find that you’ll feel better about yourself and therefore feel better about your interactions with others in general.

Closing thoughts

I want to make sure that as you reach the end of this post you take away two things with you as you go. You don’t need to be a master at all of these things to have consistent success with high quality women. Where you lack in status can be made up for in improved looks or social skills for example. But being able to have all four will really optimize your experience with women in a general sense and help you be the best man you can be at the end of the day, which is more important.

You also shouldn’t try to tackle all of these things at once. For instance start with the lifting and you will see that shines through into your confidence which helps with the relationship with yourself. Which will in turn help you with your social skills since you will feel better about yourself. These are all connected in some way shape or form and as you improve in one you will probably find yourself improving in other areas as well. But pick one thing and integrate it into your life and then move onto the next task. Whatever that may be. If anyone has any questions or helpful comments please leave them in the comment section. Good luck in the New Year everyone.