[deleted by user]

Liberaler · 2022-03-10T20:03:43+00:00

Get out of that reactive mindset. Your life runs by your own script now, what he thinks of you is irrelevant. The guys from back then can think about you whatever they want. You don't have time to focus on the past so much because you live in your new reality and strive for your current goals.

The question is not what they thinks about you and how they see you. Turn the table: Ask yourself how do you see them - maybe some of them are potential friends or at least useful acquaintances for your new goals.

The way forward is to let go of the past.

Swagster777 · 2022-03-10T19:33:52+00:00

If you're improving yourself, just get used to having haters.

If you ignore them they'll stop. The butthurt comeback you used is going to give him more fuel. He knows he got under your skin.

SpookyKG · 2022-03-10T20:33:14+00:00

lol this guy is living rent free in your head. You snapped and used a slur and wrote a reddit post.

Look. You're not coming out on top. Everything about this was weak, reactive, and pathetic.

The response should have been 'uh... why are you talking to me?'and staring at him like he's an idiot, then going about your day.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-03-10T20:43:56+00:00

Dude if you put your ego into this, you lose doesn’t matter what you say.

You do not come out on top because if you are so petty in your replies, it means they won. I bet they don’t even remember this thing anymore, while you are here writing a reddit post about it which really shows how butthurt you got.

Because the goal was to triggered you and your response shows them they succeeded. They probably laugh their ass off after your petty triggered reply.

The best reply is: “I love you too buddy” and that’s it. Don’t be a try hard, and don’t try to protect your ego

2022-03-10T21:33:35+00:00

That was a very stupid response from you, like others have said, why get so emotionally affected that you have to respond by using a horrible slur? Or even respond like that in general? People will hate, doesn’t matter who you are. Learn to be less reactive. This guy probably isnt shit. He is probably someone who has an opinion on you, and that opinion shouldn’t matter to you.

GKoala · 2022-03-10T20:37:45+00:00

You can't control other people's action, but you can control your own reactions. Fuck how they see you, worry about how you see yourself.

But if you want to be on the petty side, hit him with the reverse. He says you got a lot to grow, tell him he peaked years ago.

2022-03-10T21:35:31+00:00

You lost the exchange by even replying to him.

HornyTownCitizen · 2022-03-10T21:41:06+00:00

I'd answer something like "yup, gotta start somewhere" and continue the workout ignoring them. Douches will be douches, put your focus on yourself, my guy

rohankent · 2022-03-10T22:11:01+00:00

Also, well done on making positive changes in life. It’s hard but worth it.

SombraBlanca · 2022-03-10T22:20:27+00:00

Tl;Dr - love yourself like crazy, the rest will get the volume turned down a lot

Saying nothing and going back to your workout would've been better in your situation but the next best thing is to just love who you are, especially the guy you were before. I went through a very similar transformation right after college, with similar friends too, and the thing that really did it was me loving me. It took a while, and it's still a practice, but after months of saying 'I love you buddy' to myself everyday like I was actually saying it to someone else I loved made all the difference in how I saw myself.

Most of the lame people I knew slowly disappeared over time and the ones that didn't get the hint, I either ghosted or very concisely asked they not contact me anymore. No blowouts, no big fights, no drama.. they were just gone. And at first, I was alone.. and that fucking killed me, to the point where I started going down old paths I was trying to get away from. But Keanu was right, when you're okay being by yourself (because you know you're lovable and loving) now that solo movie/dinner isn't a social death sentence anymore. For me the quote 'wherever you go there you are' took on a different meaning, and wherever I went, I felt good being there. That comfort walks with confidence, and that will attract the people you're looking for.

And when you run into those 'friends' from back in the day they'll probably look a lot different and catching up with them won't register as something you're remotely interested in. Therefore coming out on top of these interactions will hold about the same weight..

KyleGuap · 2022-03-10T19:48:30+00:00

Try to find something about them that they can’t control.

rohankent · 2022-03-10T22:10:24+00:00

Next time an old school “friend” says something, squint, look at them up and down and ask “do I know you? Did we go to school together?”

They”ll then have to explain themselves in relation to your own life. Might make them fee irrelevant in the process too!

MattySmatty616 · 2022-03-10T22:33:47+00:00

Ignore and move on - they are just looking for an ego boost

Snight · 2022-03-10T23:35:18+00:00

Dude forget the outer game. You need to make some inner game gains and stat.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	39
Date	March 10, 2022 7:24 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/tb6lei/how_to_respond_to_old_friend_still_see_me_as/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1264876 https://theredarchive.com/post/1264876

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