Knowing That you are a nice guy

Fluganaveggnum · 2021-11-13T13:41:02+00:00

If a girl has said you are too nice they are hiding your flaws behind something good about you to avoid hurting your feelings.

Here's what too nice can really mean: -avoids confrontation -too shy -lack of confidence -doesn't show initiative -submissive -is afraid of making wrong moves -etc.

There is nothing wrong with being nice. Women will generally describe me as lovable and really nice but I still have no problem with women. They will even talk about my niceness as an attractive feature

Don't let anyone tell you that you can't be nice and kind. Those are attractive traits. Just add more attractive traits into the soup

1990MeWuzBorn · 2021-11-13T14:48:13+00:00

Being a “nice guy” is a mindset, which can be easily broken via reframing and rethinking about things. Have you read “No More Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Glover? It’s highly recommended if you haven’t already.

damiancontrol · 2021-11-13T14:37:09+00:00

Right on the money with what the previous guy said... but just to keep it shorter, when girls say you're too nice it just says you're a chump. You have to be more assertive.

One-Hedgehog4722 · 2021-11-13T17:35:40+00:00

I’d say there’s a difference between a nice guy and a good guy. Nice guy will try to please everyone and hide feelings while a good guy is a nice person but doesn’t allow people to push him around and tries to do what’s morally right. I think alot of women don’t like nice guys as they don’t employ push/pull, don’t stand up for themselves, etc. I normally make fun of girls I like, while being a nice or good person, works out fine. Just be ok with possibly offending if it’s done with good intentions and not that purpose of degrading someone for manipulation purposes. Also Think about it, if you don’t stand up for yourself, how do you expect a woman to believe you will stand up for her.

2021-11-13T16:11:24+00:00

Don’t be a nice guy. Go read No more Mr Nice guy the book

LandscapeClear1630 · 2021-11-13T18:22:02+00:00

So, you want to date without having to improve yourself? Or what you're asking is how to stop being a nice guy?

FlyingKite1234 · 2021-11-13T19:28:18+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with being a nice guy. It’s who you are, and you really shouldn’t try to change that.

When a woman tells you that you’re too nice it means she knows you’re interested in her, she doesn’t mind being around you but she doesn’t want to fuck you.

From there you simply have to take that in a decide what you want to do with it. If sex of all you seek then you should cut her off. But if you met someone you like beyond just looks then there’s no reason not to try to stay friends with her. understand that there isn’t one woman in the world, and as a guy having really good platonic girl friends can benefit you in many ways.

Pretty women tend to have pretty friends and they also tend to get invited to way more parties than guys do, especially in college. The best night clubs with the best girl/guy ratios, don’t even let you in if you don’t have women with you.

There’s nothing wrong with women trusting you. It may not be a ticket to fucking that particular but it can provide you with opportunities others.

intensely_human · 2021-11-13T16:53:06+00:00

Stop being too nice.

great_account · 2021-11-13T21:47:03+00:00

Just be who you are, but more aggressive. They really just want you to want and pursue them respectfully.

miamiric3 · 2021-11-14T00:24:25+00:00

The difference between the friend zone and something more is physical contact. Start touching girls when you meet them (with a progression of... incidental shoulder touches, arm touches, outer thigh touches, hand touches, hand holding).

That’s how you make sure to never get friend zoned again. If they pull away at any of these points, back off a bit and try again later.

(Note: If she holds your hand and starts caressing your hand (I.e. playing with your fingers when you’re playing with hers) she’s interested and potentially down to get sexual later, in private.)

reprobateArchAngel · 2021-11-14T01:11:12+00:00

You can be a nice guy. Just don’t put her on a pedestal. A secure, confident nice guy cones off completely different than a insecure, needy nice guy. Needy is a loaded term as well. Everyone has needs. To be loved, desired, and receive affection. That’s healthy and normal. Needy in the negative connotation is being codependent, anxious, and or a desperate energy. Balance those two and have your own goals and ambitions, and you just may turn into a unicorn!

2021-11-14T03:13:42+00:00

Don’t treat em like how your mommy and daddy told you to treat em. Treat em like you treat your bro and forget about “wanting to fuck her”… be cutting. Girls can sense a desperate fucker that wants to fuck and therefore act like “nice guys”… this seems fake and being your true neutral self is more sincere, which turns her on more and creates interest.

MO_drps_knwldg · 2021-11-13T18:21:45+00:00

You make it sound like it’s a static thing. You can always change your internal mind frame and how you interact with others. Nice Guys derive their self worth from acceptance by others, so work to break free of that way of thinking.

wwwjames · 2021-11-13T18:27:13+00:00

Just manage how nice you are to strangers, it's always dope to show love to friends and people you've been seeing for a bit

Social_cynicism · 2021-11-13T19:14:25+00:00

Niceness means: You are a good person who has given me no reason to be mean, but as a dating quality that means shit and I'm not interested in you at all, please leave I don't want to admit that I'm kinda shallow nor deal with the natural frustration or anger that this fact might spark within you.

MattPayneWrestler · 2021-11-13T20:15:55+00:00

Get yourself friendzoned like crazy. Then go on an outing with all your new female friends and watch them all fight over you😎. Women have to defeat other women, its their instinct.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-11-13T21:53:54+00:00

Being the nice guy is a choice. It's also a cop out.

Frostie-B3 · 2021-11-13T22:03:32+00:00

If you hear her say things like your sweet or you will make a good boyfriend. Your being a nice guy.

yassinox12 · 2021-11-13T22:17:29+00:00

I kinda hate myself for being a nice guy.

oPlayer2o · 2021-11-14T02:48:09+00:00

I dunno man I’m nice and can’t get a break.

joeohere · 2021-11-14T05:06:13+00:00

It’s me

ss1kp · 2021-11-14T06:25:35+00:00

Stop worrying about all this. Be yourself and own it. There is no secret to getting women apart from trial and error and just faking it till you make it plus making advances and flirting, after the first 10-20 successes with women it becomes second nature and you get the hang of it. You win some you loose some that's just life. Eventually when you become an old man you will be happy you tried to slay when you were young but you will also realise was it really worth all that stress and drama just for sex? Sex has become so desensitised and marketed in today's society it's really sad. That's all the kids see these days is sex, sex, sex. No wonder you guys feel pressured to have it and worry about being a virgin. Bro I've been in all your shoes I was so fixated on sex and being a virgin due to societal pressures that I lost myself in it all. I went and got with gross, manipulative, psychopathic women just to have sex because I thought it would make me better and solve all my issues but it doesn't man it just makes you empty and lose yourself. When you find someone who loves you for you, you regret losing your virginity and you understand what real passion, love, sex is instead of some meaningless hook up. You understand humanity and it all clicks and comes to you. You do you and I hope you all do slay but just don't lose yourself in it all, cause that happened to me and it was horrific.

Title	Knowing That you are a nice guy
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	95
Comments	41
Date	November 13, 2021 1:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/qt148g/knowing_that_you_are_a_nice_guy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/knowing-that-you-are-a-nice-guy.1272383 https://theredarchive.com/post/1272383

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