I'm no Brad Pitt or anything before someone says this post is a kind of humblebrag. I've been told I'm 8/10 looks-wise. Dark hair and very tall (6'4").

I'm just coming out of a very long term relationship and I want to meet women in real life. I have zero interest in online dating and only a small social circle. It's tough for me because of my age (approaching 40), the fact I have kids and the fact that I live and work in a very small town where you consistently bump into the same people.

Here's the problem:

Due to my height and looks I get lots of IOIs. I would say I get them pretty much every day, ranging from the subtle double-take of eye contact to the nudging and giggling when it's 2 girls, to outright brazen "Look at that beautiful man" (that only happened once to be fair and from an older lady who generally seem not to care/have more confidence).

I rarely approach due to the fact it's a small town and the spotlight effect is huge.

On the several occasions I have approached, I have left the interaction feeling that it didn't go well, and the girl clammed up, was quiet, serious, slightly awkward even.

But here's the thing. With 3 of the approaches that went nowhere, I have bumped into the woman at a later date and she's been obviously very interested in me. I've been told by 2 of them that they couldn't believe I approached them and that they were VERY intimidated. I remember one of them actually went bright red in the face and was covering her face with her hands while I was talking to her (later turned out she was extremely attracted to me).

With other approaches I've found that the girl was majorly into me but said that she deliberately didn't look at me because she was intimidated, even though she liked me and was happy I had approached.

I have of course been blown out quite a few times, in the interests of balance here - I repeat this is not a humblebrag attempt.

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Will a girl AVOID giving you an obvious IOI because she's shy and likes you? I think this happens a lot although this could be me inventing stuff. This is when she loiters near you, or flashes you a double take but doesn't smile or hang around.

And having seen first hand that girls are intimidated by my approach, what steps can I take to improve things?

I want to start taking advantage of my height and looks but feel at the moment it's almost holding me back as I feel the girls are intimidated by it.