Eye contact with strangers

tortugas4ever · 2017-06-02T10:16:29+00:00

1 in 20 seems pretty standard to me. Before you started the experiment, how often did you make eye contact with people in the street ? I mean, everybody, male, grannies, children ? I'm pretty sure you basically ignored 95% of the population, because you were talking to friends, because you were thinking about something, because you were watching your phone, etc. It's natural. People generally don't make eye contact with each other.

Now, it certainly works better if you stand out a little, at least in your clothing and posture. I'm not talking about peacocking here (although that might work in bars, I dunno), but if you are slightly better dressed or, have a slightly edgier look, people will look at you a little more. Posture helps a lot, too. Stand tall, be proud of you you are (or fake it till you make it) and you'll notice the difference. Honestly, I don't think it's an attractive/unattractive thing, it's just that, if you melt in the crowd, well... people won't notice you. Now, for the very same reason, in overcrowded places, too, people tend to ignore each other. So if you are in an overcrowded street, you will basically be ignored by everyone. But in the next street, where density is much smaller, people will start to notice each other.

That basically adresses the "not meet my eyes" part. As for the "looking away" part... Well... I can't tell for sure. Most women do this with me, too, it's very rare they keep watching me, maybe it's an attractiveness issue, maybe not. But there can be several reasons for this : 1- they are not attracted. 2- they think it could be dangerous to look at this man. 3- they are shy. 4- they are in their mind, they didn't really notice they were actually looking at you, their eyes glanced at you but their mind didn't. 5- she doesn't want you to think she found you attractive. etc.

Keep in mind women have a wide visual field, too. They can be looking at you even if you think they are not looking in your direction.

The idea is that, if a woman keeps eye contact with you for more than a second : cool, she's attracted, now she's waiting for you to approach her. You won't be rejected (unless she's crazy). Easy target. If a woman doesn't make/keep eye contact : well, you're on your own, maybe she's attracted, maybe not. You just don't know yet.

zbf · 2017-06-02T12:39:10+00:00

You know how before this, you would mostly avoid eye contact with people? These people are at that stage. They are avoiding eye contact because they can't fathom actually looking a stranger in the eyes. Most are like this.

pablodiablo906 · 2017-06-02T15:41:41+00:00

I make eye contact with more than 1 out of 20. It's posture and presence. Smile because today is amazing, not because it's forced, look around always, be aware of your surroundings, interact with everyone in small ways, and people will meet your eyes. It's a whole presence thing. I'm a "natural" so I don't know how much I can add here other than to say, if I see a kid playing on the street I smile laugh wave to them and make eye contact, someone walking their dog? I smile say something to the dog about being a good dog and keep walking, people smile laugh make eye contact and are generally super warm and friendly to me. I don't do it for attention or because I want something, I do it because these things happening all around us always should be enjoyed and appreciated. I think motive and purpose come to the surface and that's where it all stems from.

Jack__Knife · 2017-06-02T16:55:05+00:00

the 1 in 20 that do meet my eyes, immediately look away and keep looking away.

Just give a quick friendly smile while practicing this.

dayrone150 · 2017-06-02T14:52:23+00:00

I have experience with this. Still am doing this experiment. You have to try making eye contact at the right time and place. I never been to clubs or bars so I don't know how it works there. But a grocery store for example. I work at a grocery store so I been trying to make eye contact many times and women don't pay me mine. It's because they're too busy or in a rush. They want to go in and out.

Maybe the people that don't meet your eyes already looked at you and don't see the need to stare at you. Maybe you just didn't catch them. Try catching them when they acknowledge you. For those that meet your eyes maybe you need to smile or say hello. I'm a serious guy and that scared most people when I give them the serious stare.

2017-06-02T20:52:03+00:00

I've noticed that if you look them in the eyes and smile? Something will happen, either she smiles back or looks away.

If she smiles back, talk to her and see where it goes.

Cevar7 · 2017-06-02T15:53:27+00:00

I've found that people are more likely to make eye contact with me when it's obvious that I'm looking at them. Say that I'm walking in a parking lot. I'm on one side and they're on the other. If I have to turn my head all the way to the left to look at them it's going to be pretty obvious and they'll look back at me most of the time. Another good example would be when you're walking down an aisle and you look back at them.

ImJustSo · 2017-06-02T11:52:03+00:00

I stand out, I'm not absolutely sure why. I walk confidently and comfortably in my own skin. I dress well, my hair is always styled, my beard is always groomed, etc. A ton of people make eye contact with me, but very, very few maintain eye contact. Generally, the ones who maintain eye contact only have a few responses. There's ones who seem attracted to me, there's ones who seem challenged by me, and ones who are apathetic to me.

I might be physically attractive, I might be emotionally attractive, or I might just be interesting to look at. I don't know what it is, but a lot more than 1 in 20 look at my eyes.

datingcoachonwheels · 2017-06-03T06:37:17+00:00

I smile at people too, and people smile back with more often, so I made you a video reply: https://youtu.be/_DEbcm-C5m4

Let me know how it goes next time you try it out!

SyrusDrake · 2017-06-03T23:19:38+00:00

A while ago, I started deliberately trying to make eye contact. Tried it for about three weeks or so. Pretty much made the same observation as you, out of probably hundreds of people I passed, maybe...five looked at me and none longer than literally a blink of an eye.

I did notice however that upon entering a room, like a lecture hall or canteen, people would often look at me but in a way that...well...you know the expression "if a gaze could kill"? I'd be very dead then. The best word to describe those looks is "disdain". To this day, I got no idea why. But there you go, if you want people to look at you, disgust them.

Title	Eye contact with strangers
Author	wow_wow01
Upvotes	63
Comments	21
Date	June 2, 2017 6:18 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6eso23/eye_contact_with_strangers/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/eye-contact-with-strangers.1425537 https://theredarchive.com/post/1425537

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