Date last night with HB9 from OKC. She is three inches taller than I, 15 years younger than I, and has worked as a model, although she is now focusing on social work (her degree).

I had number closed about a week ago based on a tentative possibility of meeting, but that hadn't worked out (I didn't end up free after all). I texted her thusly to ask her out:

  • me: Drink with me?
  • she: Sure as long as youre not creepy. i have to be up early tomorrow though.
  • me: Looooool babe you are much creepier than I am and I'm still game to meet you. 830?
  • she: Haha love it. where?
  • me: There is a great show on tonight at the black sheep inn. We could meet downtown and head together. If you are online can send link.
  • she: I dont know where that is and ive got to be up by 6am tomorrow.
  • she: Nope not online.
  • she: What kinda show?
  • me: I reread your musical preferences on your profile and will guarantee your delight. Where is convenient to meet? [arrange details, coffee shop by her house]

I arrive and she is waiting outside. She is wearing jeans and a very flattering red decollete. The cruelty of wearing three inch smoking red heels fails to shake my confidence, although she now towers over me hilariously.

I start kino right away, "la bise" as I meet her and then lead her by the arm towards my car, then touch her on her lower back as I open the door for her and direct her in. Natural, simple.

But, clearly we hit it off, and we chat for the half-hour or so it takes us to get to the venue.

The first band is just this solo guy with his guitar, and he has bad energy for a date. Glum, pensive, break-up songs, etc. I tell her we're going to go to the river and we cross the street and trespass down to someone's dock. We can still hear the music and agree to go back when that guy's over. Suddenly we're alone under the stars (you can see the Milky Way in Wakefield, nice.) We share adventure stories and build intimacy, I escalate kino, lying next to her on the dock first our arms touch, then thighs. As a conversation changes, I sit up next to her, she still lying on her back, and I put my arm over her hip so that my right leg is up against her hip and my hand is on the dock on the other side of her. We talk some more, it's going well. She notices the opener has ended and we head back upstairs.

The real band was killer fun and the mood was just right. I continue up the Dicarlo ladder (read it if this doesn't come naturally) and after some arm and shoulder kino, sitting close etc everything was green so I took her wrist and examined a cool tattoo she has around her right wrist (snow leopard spots). To do that, I had to remove a leather bracelet that was covering some of it, and did that, it felt a bit like undressing her and it was hot (for me at least). Put the bracelet back on but when I went back to concentrating on the band I took her hand. She took it back, textbook, started stroking my fingers. Still all green. Over the next hour or more we were sitting close, touching constantly, my hand on her thigh (eventually all the way up her thigh) and hers on mine, holding hands, etc. She gives an amazing hand rub, I literally bit my lip.

The show ended it was almost midnight, and so we got up and set to go. I introduced myself to the band on the way out (dhv I guess but I really wanted to compliment them it was awesome) and made it back to the car. Chatted with good animation all the way home, and here's where I FUCK UP.

The chemistry and fun was good all night. On the Dicarlo ladder, he says to save kissing for when you can continue to escalate all the way. I DID NOT DO THIS. I should have left it there, left her wanting more, and gotten to an easy 3-date close (possibly 2-date close) next time. Instead, I went for an awkward kiss goodbye in the car and oooooooopppppssss she's not comfortable kissing in a car in front of the street and bla bla bla date ends with her rebuffing me.

Did not need to be this way. Leave her wanting more. Study your ladder. FUCK.

Yes I know it's recoverable but I was handling it like a STAR until then.