How do guys go out alone?

gustmes · 2016-06-05T07:41:23+00:00

Went out alone tonight for the first time ever. Opened 2 sets, then gave up after 2 hours.

It is really hard

KKavi · 2016-06-05T12:57:24+00:00

I use to face that problem some time back, but now i have fixed it.

To go out solo and sarge alone can be a nightmare for most of the guys out there but believe me it is not. They get way too uncomfortable and at that moment it just seems impossible to stop a total stranger and get into a conversation. For some guys they think that what they are going to say when set would ask them what are you doing here alone.

What i use to say is Me- i just thought of going out and making some new friends n have a little adventure. or say My friends just left but i didn't wanted to leave so that i can make some new friends and guess what i just found them.

The secret is just commit to it from your heart. Just give yourself a commitment that you are not going to leave for say 1 hour or something like that and you would at least talk to 3 girls otherwise you wouldn't allow yourself to leave, even if that means you have to stay there all night long but trust me if you commit you are going to talk at least 3 girls, the challenge that you have given yourself.

The moment you would start doing it guess it you will get into your vibe, and then you wouldn't even remember that it used to be so hard for you to even talk to someone while you are alone.

I hope it helps you. thanks :)

lickylicky_69 · 2016-06-05T15:06:38+00:00

I hate to say this but all of my friends are big pussies. And I am talking about people who are 2 years older than - 22+

I try pushing them out of their comfort zone but they rarely have the confidence.

I'm used to going solo at this point. In a way it's better because if you "fail" nothing to worry about.

gramblenator · 2016-06-05T14:02:38+00:00

I've found it easier to go to a low key/ dive bar that's not too crowded. Also, hit it up afternoon, early evening. I've found some single females eating or grabbing a quick drink at the bar on break or after work. Honestly even restaurants that have a decent bar works just as well. The more crowded the place is, the harder it is in my opinion. Some people can do it, but I haven't left that comfort zone yet.

zauberwuerfel · 2016-06-05T11:32:54+00:00

3 things that helped me, even they are pretty basic.

Just do it! -> Nothing will change, if you don't change. Talk to People! -> It's not hard as it looks, if you feel the right chemistry with a HB, just talk random stuff and see if she puts some effort into you

Last thing what helped me alot, go to other clubs where other girls are which could be more interested in you :)

peace and good luck (Y)

b214n · 2016-06-05T07:34:21+00:00

Karaoke if you have the nuts for it

bugxter · 2016-06-05T15:29:00+00:00

It helps if you love to dance and only go with the intention of having fun

DaygameCoach · 2016-06-05T17:38:05+00:00

Daygame is usually done alone so try that. You can do bars too, and but I recommend becoming friendly with the staff so you have the built in social proof of a regular BUT you can do it cold too.

Read all the sidebar help. Open 10 women a day for a month and let us know how it is going.

2016-06-05T07:34:14+00:00

Ok so go to a club/bar = Make a homebase. The homebase can be a guy or a girl you don't like. Befriend them and approach girls. So that after the interaction ends you aren't standing there doing nothing and getting stuck in your head. You can go back to the homebase (guy/girl) and just chit chatting.

Daygame = Approach one girl and as you are talking to her, if you see another attractive girl, approach her and bring the girls together. And just keep doing that and you'll be surrounded by women in the day.

lofiharvest · 2016-06-05T15:19:02+00:00

I don't prefer going out alone, but have done it. Three weeks ago I felt like meeting a girl but no one was around. So I went to a local bar that attracts that type of women I'm interested in. I started out by socializing with both the men and women in the club. Eventually I was having a good time chatting with this one group of people. I then spotted a girl that caught my attention. I walked up and said simply 'Hello, I saw you from across the bar and thought you seemed like a lovely person. I wanted to meet you. My name is ...'. Got her number and had a date with her a few days later. Didn't really go anywhere from there but she did say she was really impressed that I had the guts to approach her like I did.

Aarondhp24 · 2016-06-05T17:10:15+00:00

OP, I've moved away from gaming, but I still use a lot of what /r/seddit teaches to make my interactions with people more organic. When I feel like I know what I'm doing, I have a much better time hanging out with people.

The other day I was in Savannah, GA and went out to get some buffallo wings, arguably the most unattractive food to eat in front of people. A lady in her mid 30's asked if I could scoot down so her and her friend could sit next to me.

I started up a very general discussion about the shitty weather, the good wings, what they were in town for, etc. By the end of the night we were walking around to different places and just having an all around great time.

I wasn't super attracted to to either of these ladies, but I had fun and made two friends in Minnesota that have offered to show me around if I ever head up that way.

I entered into this situation just talking to random people. Some folks are very hesitant to strike up conversations. Others go out specifically hoping a random stranger will approach and interact with them.

Think about the apprehension you have approaching a super hot person. Many people have that approaching anyone not just the person they find attractive. If you go into it without expectations and just try to enjoy yourself (make the best of the situation), you will find more often than not people responding positively to it. I always make friends with people, even if I'm not into them specifically. They will introduce you to people too and that is a very easy way to meet someone you really like.

Wanderjar · 2016-06-05T19:12:37+00:00

I don't often go out alone, but the best successes I've had for meeting chicks has happened when my friends and I would go to a club, for example, get a round of drinks and then split up and maybe not see each other for the rest of the night. Its nice to know that your bros are there and just a text away, but I don't like having a wingman. That works for meeting chicks as well as platonic friends. You go off, stand around, and inevitably conversation will just kind of happen.

recyclablebanthas · 2016-06-05T23:55:13+00:00

I literally go on tons of dates but they don't lead to anything

Why do you think they don't lead anywhere?

At what point are things going wrong?

and I have no friends in the area.

This is probably an impediment because it could be adding an element of desperation that you don't have a support network.

I want to stop with the online dating and meet people in person but I just don't know how you do it solo?

Look up different activities online. And join them. Some that I'd recommend:

Taking up a social partner dance. These are awesome. You get into a mixed group of people and you're learning a dance which requires you to learn "game" if you really want to improve. Look up where they teach lessons or have classes near you. Examples: salsa, Lindy hop, Argentine tango, etc.
Join a hash run group. Really this is running or walking. People following a trail of flour through the woods, and meeting at the end point to drink. Then going somewhere to eat together.

There are a lot of options. What are you into?

maserti · 2016-06-06T03:25:32+00:00

I'm not sure if someone else may of said this but. It's all in your mind. If you say your scared and not sure what to say or do you will. What I started to do is themes. So let's say if I want to go shop for clothes. That's my theme anything else in between is extra. So whilst I'm shopping I can see a nice looking girl I might be interested in, so I'll go strike up small talk. If I don't get her number who cares, millions of women in the world. So there's an example as you go out to do something your mind is set on that. My theme of shopping for example and when you take your mind off approaching women it gets easier since you're not fixated on approaches.

Indoctrinator · 2016-06-06T03:51:00+00:00

Another advantage of going out solo is your don't have anybody judging you. You can just feel free to talk to anybody. Like others said, to improve your overall social skills.

I've got a friend who I go out with sometimes that refuses to talk to anybody under an 8. So depending where we end up, he may feel there isn't anybody worth talking to. And he doesn't like talking just to talk. I generally don't care what he thinks, but not having him there, knowing he is probably judging me for the 7 or 6 in talking to, makes me more relaxed. And I can just talk to people, guys or girls and have fun.

CA_Tenant · 2016-06-06T07:05:59+00:00

I just don't know how you do it solo?

Just do it.

I'm a natural introvert, so this is nothing at all for me.

Just do it. It's whatever. I prefer to do it by myself, actually, because none of my friends have game and they'll just end up ruining it for me.

I actually had to ditch my friends at a party.

Title	How do guys go out alone?
Author	SupaZT
Upvotes	37
Comments	32
Date	June 5, 2016 5:27 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4mm3ud/how_do_guys_go_out_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-guys-go-out-alone.1407731 https://theredarchive.com/post/1407731

Comments