How does meeting people at bars work?

ObjectiveCat5526 · 2026-06-26T18:33:40+00:00

Easier if you go with a wing or a group. Groups gravitate towards groups. Not impossible solo however

Altokation · 2026-06-26T17:17:07+00:00

Now a days less common but still works. In this case you need to befriend the whole group, don’t go for the girl right away. But that also depends on the dynamic of the group. But the principle is that you have to also be accepted by the whole group or they’ll cockblock you.

Simple opener for a group is “hey you guys look like fun” and cheersing them with your drink. You gotta win eveeyone over so don’t hyperfixate on the girls.

Most-Famous-Wasabi · 2026-06-26T22:09:20+00:00

*Warm up*

Be social. Talk to everyone. Get the brain-to-mouth connection working.
Talk to people on the way to the venue. Talk to everyone at any excuse at the venue.

*Talk to groups*

If you see a woman that you like, talk to her and her friends.

*Be Charismatic*

This is a honable skill: be socially calibrated - self-aware of your position within the group. Be aware of the push-pull dynamic. Be aware of how building and breaking rapport work. Learn when and how to use earnestness, lightheartedness, openess, humour.

Be warm and open.

*Get your reps in*

If you want to learn how to pull women from bars, be prepared to go out often with this intent and fuck it up a lot. Learning emotional management and self-generated state has a huge role to play here, and will likely require long-term deep inner work. But the first step is getting those reps in.

Being warm and open can be tough after a few rejections. Real players are the ones that have learnt to push through the emotional lows and come back swinging.

*In addition*

Go out on your own. Don't expect your friends to understand why you are trying to improve yourself - they won't understand. Be open to learning new things.

abcsofattraction · 2026-06-26T18:11:39+00:00

Going solo is actually fine. You're not trying to integrate into someone else's group, you're just making brief contact with new people.

The Cheers opener is built exactly for this: eye contact, raise your glass, say cheers, give your name. Socially acceptable, almost zero rejection, and it works on anyone sitting nearby or standing at the bar. Do it ten times in a night with no attachment to outcome. The rest of the conversation builds from there once you have a name exchange going.

Yes, people hook up from bars regularly. That's what bars are for.

FindingNewLeaf · 2026-06-26T18:14:52+00:00

Going out to bars is a great way to make friends and you can bet you will find other guys also looking to hook up with girls, which can make great improv wingman.

u/Altokation already gave one good example, I'll give you another, and you should pick whatever better suits your personality.

If you just want to get laid, you can look for the dtf girls, usually they are by themselves (although not for long) and thet just drink or walk around the bar depending on how big the place is.

You can also look for groups of 3 and 5, have a very small chat with everyone, ask how everyone knows each other, if the odd one out interests you, you can chat with her while the other 2/4 entertain each other.

Outside of social dynamics, it's gave as usuall, at a bar nobody is too serious, be more lighthearted and fun, don't look too drunk and don't look too desperate.

Chicagoj1563 · 2026-06-26T20:28:06+00:00

There is a lot of advice you can get about night game. But most won’t matter at this point most likely.

You only need to focus on two things.

Opening.
And adapting a positive mindset no matter what.

That’s it. Just go out and have fun. Try starting conversations even is it’s just 10 seconds. And any negative thoughts you have, replace it with self amusement. Laugh at it.

Then you will have reference experiences and something to work with. Try to improve every time you go out. Stretch yourself.

jjboy91 · 2026-06-27T17:59:27+00:00

No idea where I live everyone is sat with their friends and they don't mingle as the service is at their table directly.

norwegiandoggo · 2026-06-26T18:22:32+00:00

Just go in and say hi to everyone.

epimpstyle · 2026-06-26T18:55:18+00:00

I don't really have any friends to go to the bars with

You don't even have to! But when you go, you need to have that vibe like you're waiting for some friends. Even if you talk to someone, you tell them you're waiting for your friends, because saying you're there by yourself looks really bad, only depressed people or alcoholics go out alone.

Is it common for people to like meet women at bars and like hookup and even get laid later?

It depends on the type of bar (or club). If you go to a local bar, you'll find a certain type of girls there, and things happen fast.....and it works like a charm if you're not picky. It's enough to just go to a such a place you've never been before, and since you're a new face there, those girls will notice you before you even notice them.

It's very simple in those kinds of places. Many times there is no need to go inside a certain bar, you can just find girls outside. Actually, it works better if you meet them outside and tell them "that bar sucks... some drunk guy just fell down and said the bar's ghosts pushed him... there are ghosts inside..." If they like your vibe, problem solved! Otherwise, they'll ignore you and go inside anyway. However, you can try your luck again once they're inside, because it'll be very easy since you've already talked to them outside.

randomthirdworldguy · 2026-06-27T05:51:30+00:00

Be natural, patient for the chance and when the chance is up, be specific and straight forward about what you want, but not in a creepy way. Stop and dont ever think back when things not going as you planned

Dramatic-Western-609 · 2026-06-28T06:05:10+00:00

Yes, it's called nightgame and guys go out solo all the time and get laid from it.

duke_awapuhi · 2026-06-28T16:19:57+00:00

I just start talking to people and they talk back

Ill-Ad-372 · 2026-06-26T19:41:58+00:00

same problem here getting high alone sucks

Extreme-Orange5557 · 2026-06-26T19:19:38+00:00

Alcohol. Lots of alcohol.

Title	How does meeting people at bars work?
Author	Comfortable-Tart-420
Upvotes	44
Comments	20
Date	June 26, 2026 5:02 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ugckin/how_does_meeting_people_at_bars_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-does-meeting-people-at-bars-work.1583662 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583662

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