How the hell do u keep a conversation going?!

chikinpickle · 2012-09-02T15:57:08+00:00

Go out and do interesting things around people. Collect interesting stories. Tell them. Profit.

futuremo · 2012-09-02T17:04:54+00:00

Here you go, conversational threading.

ripusintopieces · 2012-09-02T16:12:10+00:00

one of the coolest misspellings ive seen in a while

SoInsightful · 2012-09-02T16:34:29+00:00

You can never run out of things to say.

However, you can run out of things that you think are "cool" to say.

Learn to explore tangentially related topics, and to listen for openings to new topics.

casanexta · 2012-09-02T17:21:49+00:00

Your goal is to find some passion you have in common. That's what delves small, surface talk to the deeper connection conversations.

To do this, a helpful method is threading. This takes whatever the other person says and spin it off to a story or question.

"I'm from California" -> "Oh, I remember one time when I was there..." OR "What made you come out here?"

Use your environmental cues to start new threads if the conversation dies down.

Be creative, have fun, and don't slip into interview-mode. "What's your name? Where you from? What's your major? Why'd you pick that?"

funkmasterfelix · 2012-09-02T17:46:10+00:00

the goal is to talk about something that inspires great emotion in her -- perhaps a cause she's passionate about or a dream of hers. In order to do this, though, you need to find out what it is that inspires her. I frequently ask point-blank what she's passionate about and why. it shouldn't be the first thing out of your mouth (if she isn't a little bit attracted to you and comfortable with you, she might feel like you're violating her boundaries), but you can usually go there sooner than you think. then have an authentic conversation about this thing with her where you seek to learn but also to contribute your viewpoint to the dialogue. be sure to be present and listen attentively when she speaks so that you can accurately and transparently communicate your reaction to what she's experiencing.

I like to think of conversations with new people as serving 2 goals -- 1) i want to connect with more people and 2) i want to use conversation to weed out people I don't want to connect with. So when asking "what are your passions?" or "what inspires you?" I'm hoping she'll say something that fascinates me and draws me in, but i'm prepared for her to be utterly bland in which case i'm moving on. The conversation filters out people i don't want to connect with, despite my strong desire to connect with other people.

edit: it's also good to talk about what inspires you and arouses your passion

layla_24 · 2012-09-02T17:50:55+00:00

Learn to spell, then come back and I'm sure we'd love to help.

KIDDING, um girls like talking about themselves. Ask her about how she's doing, just move smoothly into conversation. Don't over think it sweety.

dxdifr · 2012-09-02T17:00:39+00:00

DHV Stories
Teasing/ Flirting
Wide and deep rapport
Congruence in speech
Eye contact
Kino
Routines
Conveying your personality and good qualities.
Role playing
Cold reading

gameaholic908 · 2012-09-02T19:04:41+00:00

This was an unfound “strength” I had. I recall having some troubles keeping conversations going back in high school, but my wing keeps pointing out how I managed to keep conversations flowing. I will try to break down how I approach conversations. Before I do, I need to point out that it truly depends on the girl. If the girl isn’t interested in you, you can never force or manipulate her to talk. Never walk into the room with the expectation that you can carry a conversation with every woman in the room. Walk into the room with the understanding that you HAVE WHAT IT TAKES to make a conversation flow. If she is uninterested or horrible at talking, find another girl. Below are the main guidelines I follow.

Be interested: delve into her aspirations and passions. Who is this beautiful woman in front of you?
Be interesting: either through your stories or personality, latter works better. People often remember the personalities of other people rather than their personal stories. If you think of all your friends, do you immediately think of their personalities or their personal stories?
Be vocal: if she asks you to repeat yourself you are doing it wrong.
Be comfortable: speak firmly and at a slow pace. Show comfortable body language. Her comfort level is determined by yours.
Embrace silence: It is definitely NOT your responsibility to jump in and fill in silence. Breathe it in and just be quiet for a few seconds. If she still doesn’t talk, make a comment about something, point out something awkward, or ask a question and answer it yourself with a long answer (displaying the type of answer you expect from her).
Maintain eye contact. Enough said.
Have fun: I don’t need to explain this.

I’ve broken down fundamentally what works for me thus far. This seems like a generic list, but in a genuine conversation, it’s not about memorizing lines or routines, but sticking to the fundamentals.

riotingchimps · 2012-09-02T19:34:20+00:00

learn not to give a shit. be self amused. crack jokes. make fun of her jokingly.

2012-09-02T20:06:07+00:00

Learn to spell/talk properly. You'll be slaying all the bitches with good grammar.

verxix · 2012-09-02T20:43:52+00:00

Being interested is the first step to being interesting.

-FnB- · 2012-09-02T21:29:28+00:00

Hey buddy, Let me begin by congradulating you on your efforts.

Talking to girls is just like talking to anyone else. It's normal and natural to feel anxiety, the important thing is to realize that your anxiety comes from the arbitrary need to be 'outcome dependent'. Being outcome dependent will automatically place expectation upon oneself without taking into account that many factors that come with talking to women are beyond your control. From now on try and catch yourself in the act, take a breath and remember that what ever conversations you strike up with women are simply organic. Think about a girls perspective, she gets hit on all the time. She probably has heard the many lines from the Gaming world. The first step it to be relax... Find a common ground.. If she's at a party, talk about the party. You want to make her comfortable, so be dominant in your mannerisms.

Somethings you can focus on: 1 Take up space! Own your personal space 2 dont be afraid to invite gixrls into your personal space 3 speak with your voice and hands 4 women are primarily over dramatic relate with them so the will open up 5 women will feel pressure when you approach them, so they might shit test you be being cold in the beginning. A good rememdy to this is to be sarcastic 6 don't be outcome dependent, approach everyone and it will be easier when you talk to the 9's and 10's 7 most important: work on yourself.. Continue things like this channel on reddit, learn about how to address internal issues.

Hope this helps some. Good luck; you'll be fine.

FnB

2012-09-02T17:24:31+00:00

How about instead of you being interesting be interested. Ask questions, learn about their story, and prod for information.

Moonlight_Knight · 2012-09-03T01:23:19+00:00

I used to use FORD method back when I was less socially adept.

FORD: Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams. You can kill hours just by talking about these four topics.

Ifixtehbooboos · 2012-09-03T02:01:29+00:00

Being a good conversationalist is something that's best learned on your own. You can learn many things on this board, but none of that means anything if you aren't going to get out there and give it a shot. When I was still in high school I did horrible with women and social interaction in general. I came back for my junior year with the thought of "fuck it" and would just be extremely forward in my social situations. It worked out pretty good for me, and while i won't lie and say I could pull any piece of ass I want (let's face it no one can). I will say the pieces of ass I do get are the ones I want to sleep with. Watching lots of standup comedy is a good start. Just don't talk about what they say at the risk of looking fake.

2012-09-03T05:11:44+00:00

Thread the conversation

falafin · 2012-09-02T16:03:24+00:00

How about talking about something you like

asnof · 2012-09-02T15:52:50+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	How the hell do u keep a conversation going?!
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	22
Comments	42
Date	September 2, 2012 3:49 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/z8eji/how_the_hell_do_u_keep_a_conversation_going/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-the-hell-do-u-keep-a-conversation-going.1338470 https://theredarchive.com/post/1338470

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