My Intro. Is It Actually Worth It?

chalengr · 2010-12-05T23:59:17+00:00

You need to start doing more approaches. Try to open at least one stranger per day, as you go about your business -- could be anybody, doesn't have to be a female.

Don't worry about f-closes. If you want to do well, you gotta enjoy it every step of the way to the f-close--and that means enjoying getting rejected as well, to some extent (I know that sounds counter-intuitive, but discovering your mistakes after reflecting on interactions is very fun).

So there you go, the game isn't about getting to the end, it's about the journey.

throwaraptor · 2010-12-05T21:47:15+00:00

Is it worth it?

Hell yes.

You need some one on one coaching. If there are no sedditors in LA that are willing to sarge with you, I GREATLY recommend David Wygant.

2010-12-06T00:45:50+00:00

Tbh, sounds like you are mythologizing women to a point where you don't consider them human, but more so an artifact of some sort. The hardest part for me was trying to realize that women are just human as well.

ArMcK · 2010-12-05T22:58:01+00:00

Sounds tough. You're in a hard spot, man. If I were in your spot I would do this:

Use OkC to make friends and activity partners and that's it. Right now you need someone to hang out with to expand your social circles.
Like throwraptor said, TD's Blueprint Decoded for internal game is a big time help, and if you mix in Ross Jeffries' Nail Your Inner Game you'll conquer your anxiety fast.
Build your confidence based on small successes. You're going for the gold in ski jumping but you haven't even conquered the rope tow for kids yet. Pick a bar and go there at least once a week. Get to know everybody who works there. You want that place to feel like home in bed under the covers reading a comic book, i.e. it's your world where you're safe and free to let your imagination rule. Then pick another bar and repeat.
Keep working on day game. That is where your strength is, and obviously you need to get laid soon, that's where it's likely to come from. Day game works well with directness. Work on opening and getting more emails and numbers. Numbers are stronger, but add them like an after thought: "Hey, you're cool, let's trade emails I've got some cool stuff you'll like. Great. Be sure to put your name there too. . .right. Oh go ahead and put your number down there too. Beautiful, here's my card. . ." I dated an HB7 for a year because of that right there, and she even had a boyfriend when I # closed her.

huyvanbin · 2010-12-05T23:53:43+00:00

I used to feel the way you do about going in to bars. After a few years of going by myself, I feel pretty comfortable showing up anywhere and just chilling by myself. So at least that part gets easier.

throwaway42 · 2010-12-06T01:22:30+00:00

Some general things one can usually find in here:

be yourself

Yes, be yourself, but have that self be awesome. Get yourself an interesting hobby (that interests you of course) like climbing. You will meet interesting people and you will have something to talk about with other people you open.

I have a hard time even finding girls I can approach IRL, and need a lot of IOIs

Always assume attraction. You are awesome! Of course they want to get to know you.

I feel if I don't handle this, it will cause more serious anxiety/depression and wreck the other decent parts of my life

The more you do it the easier it will become. Set small goals for yourself and work yourself up. If you set the goal too high right the start, you will fret and this apparent 'failure' will make you more anxious the next time around. Just talk to people, anyone and everyone, not just those you want to get into your bed.

alexryane · 2010-12-06T01:45:02+00:00

The first good thing you'll learn is that three dates is not usually needed. You can be fucking the same night you meet 50% of the time.

Mouthpiece · 2010-12-06T02:52:49+00:00

TL;DR: Fuck, The Game is Hard. Waaaaah. Mommy. Waaaah.

I agree: at this point, you don't have any choice. Sounds to me like finding some wingmen may be very beneficial.

Glimpseofahifive · 2010-12-06T09:33:33+00:00

In my opinion you're skipping to the end step first. You don't have to meet with girls right away, you obviously aren't prepared for that yet. First you just need to work on knowing how to carry a conversation. If you see somebody you could possibly have a small conversation with, chat them up female or male. If you're waiting in line at the market, talk to the person at the cash register, you need more practice talking to people you don't know so it isn't awkward.

2010-12-06T10:59:38+00:00

So I've been trying hard for 3+ months to meet girls IRL and on OKC. (...) So that's what 18 months and hundreds of hours of work have bought me.

The theory/practice ratio here is waaaay too high, dude. Look at it another way, you've been only doing game for 3 months. Hang on and you'll get better.

2010-12-06T11:10:07+00:00

"to get through all the stupid first-three-date mistakes I should have made when I was 14."

No one learns this stuff at 14. Everyone is in the dark about it for much longer than you think. I've heard a lot of guys get very frustrated at this, but there's no reason to.

2010-12-06T21:25:02+00:00

What kind of women do you chase? Practicing with HB4's isn't a bad idea.

Title	My Intro. Is It Actually Worth It?
Author	reph
Upvotes	11
Comments	30
Date	December 5, 2010 9:43 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/egp5x/my_intro_is_it_actually_worth_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/my-intro-is-it-actually-worth-it.1293816 https://theredarchive.com/post/1293816

Comments