never-ending pain

K3wp · 2018-11-20T21:10:58+00:00

Just FYI, I had a bunch of shitbag ex-girlfriends that treated men like disposable assets.

They all ended up getting divorced by their husbands and miserable singles after age 35. It will catch up with them.

Silent_E · 2018-11-20T16:33:20+00:00

Sorry man. That is unfortunately the nature of being a dude - disposability. It shouldn't be this way but it is and it's not going to change. So you need to adapt to it by making yourself indisposable.

Make going out with you a no-brainer because of the value you provide.

EDIT: A word.

neoda1 · 2018-11-20T17:20:08+00:00

cause girls feel entitled man

kaythanna · 2018-11-20T22:24:37+00:00

A lot of men hate women, a lot of women hate men. Honestly, you might not like this, but it's normal. This is how it's going down, the ones who find mates will be the ones who endured the trauma. Just like the animal kingdom, everyones not suppose to mate, it's a privelage of the superior.

In today 2018 jungle emotional endurance wins out. The ones who cant take rejection blood line will perish. It might suck, but it is fair. I feel your hurt through your text and I'm really sorry. I hope you dust yourself off and realize that this is what we are all going through regardless of gender.

I find guys I like and figure out there actually super bitter douches who ran into some sadistic cunts who fucked them over for no reason. However their valid stories doesnt make them more attractive and suitable to date through all their baggage.

Women who wont get over their trauma they have from horrible abusive men to give an actual good guy a chance end up alone and miserable as well. It's just the way of the human species kingdom, as it is for most living beings. Despite what you think rejection and most times a lot of it, is a part of the game. Being okay by yourself usually helps too. Love to you❤

mynameiswut · 2018-11-20T23:11:09+00:00

I think you need to evaluate the reasonableness of your expectations. I would guess most guys and girls around your age also don't have anyone this holiday season. Is your expectation to have someone right now reasonable? Or do you just feel entitled to someone, given past experience, your looks, etc.

Doesn't feel good to lower one's expectations I know, but if you are feeling sad over unreasonable expectations that's not very smart. Happiness = expectations - reality. If your expectations are unrealistic doesn't make sense to fret over them.

Also, the never-ending pain, this is simply part of the game my friend. We all go through it. Radio-silence texts, poor choice of words, bad dates, not being funny or confident or relaxed enough. It's all part of the growth process. And you can either tap out and say this game is too hard or you can buckle down, get humble, and keep going, having faith that you will improve over time if you are willing to be smart about getting better. There is always a point that separates the boys from the men, are you going to choose the path least taken?

One_Insanity · 2018-11-20T17:01:38+00:00

Like the homie u/Silent_E said. As men we're disposable. Why do you think we're the ones that go to war? It's fucked up but that's the reality.

Women pick and choose. Sure they have their own set of problems and all that but this is our problem and it's fucked up.

You gotta become someone that can't be easily dismissed and deleted. And listen, I don't know what you mean by

i try to get away from dating for a while because of the pain it's caused me, and the universe finds a way to shit on me regardless.

But you may be overreacting at this stage. You can get away from dating by just being a teeth gritted, hardy, relentless motherfucker that focuses on his own shit. Shit won't always go your way in general. Not just with women. So you gotta suck it up. For yourself, man. You owe it to yourself to make yourself happy. Not for women, people or this world. For yourself.

DajuanKev · 2018-11-20T20:47:11+00:00

I potentially hate girls, to. They have way more power that they may realize and some will wear shit that fucks with your urges. Its like your basically set up to be the next with having uncontrollable hormones.

We're ultimately responsible for the approach, like puppets.

geeered · 2018-11-20T17:11:23+00:00

i'm not looking for advice, guess i just needed to rant

It sounds like you need some, however!

I have no idea what the advice is - I suck at this myself!

But no doubt there are ways to improve, which plenty of others have managed to do.

I've told myself recently "What I'm doing isn't working for what I want to achieve - I can't reasonably expect the rest of society to change to reflect how I want my life to work, so I need to change my life to work with the rest of society."

3000west · 2018-11-20T19:51:47+00:00

It sucks. The pain is real. Stick with it, it gets better. Contact me if you want any specific tips.

kamiactive · 2018-11-21T01:00:30+00:00

Read the book the rational male by Rollo tomassi

gettinglittytitty · 2018-11-20T17:25:15+00:00

"a key that can open any lock is a master key. A lock that can be opened by any key is a shit lock"- I have no fucking idea

LOL-4-DAYZ · 2018-11-20T19:53:03+00:00

I get you bro. Its fucking depressing. Im literally going through the same thing. Im just putting my bets into moving out after college and starting my life for real. Mainly because my studys dont allow me to do shit about my love life. Thats in about 2 years and id lie if i told you i dont get fucking lonely and impatient from here to there. I try and keep the emotions away by compulsively masterbating but that shits honestly boring as fuck now. I dont even enjoy it. I want to be with a woman. Not just for sex but for the conpany. Just hangout and have someone to hug and play with their hair.

I played the dating game for a couple months a while back and was relativley good but just lost all patience at the end because of how slow and a pain in the ass all of it is as you may know. Plus i started fucking up in school which in the grand scheme of things is not worth it to me. Thats why id rather beat my dick and not think about my girls instead of failing my classes.

Look man, i did realize something on my journey. If you put yourself in some promising situations, then you raise the possibility of love finding you. What i mean is expand your social circles. Hamgout with different people. Be a part of groups, orga izations or something you like, a hobby. Be just-friends with girls and who knows mabye a month later you and her friend meet and like each other. This is also not gonna get you a girlfriend tommarow but your increasing your odds without even trying. At the same time you meet new people and gain more friends and ultimatley are more occupied so your not worrying about girls all the time. I realized that im actually really good with girls recently when i was in the dating game. I say recently because the past 2-3 years ive been studying by myself in the libary and not talking to anyone. The very few times i did interact with girls, i feel like i could have actually had a relationship with quite a few of them if i tried.

Go out there and just be you and some girl might notice you and like you for just being you. I know it sounds chessy but ive seen it happen to many friends. (Unfortunatly not me lol)

Btw dont spend chrismas alone bro, go hangout with friends or family. Go to a church and just volenteer....youll get free food and mabye meet that special someone ;)

Best of luck man!

TheCarlyleanHero · 2018-11-21T15:39:10+00:00

Remember, suicide is always an option.

MetalPandaDance · 2018-11-20T18:13:48+00:00

Don't spend Christmas alone, my dude! Is there a local potluck or get together you can go to? Sounds like you need some non-judgemental support.

Title	never-ending pain
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	14
Comments	39
Date	November 20, 2018 4:24 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/9ytnb9/neverending_pain/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/never-ending-pain.1301734 https://theredarchive.com/post/1301734

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