"No more Mr.Nice Guy" will it help me?

Parakoopa · 2015-07-08T16:18:05+00:00

I think Models may be a good read if you haven't already.

alltrueism · 2015-07-08T19:22:15+00:00

I just finished this book and I didn't consider myself a nice guy either. However, it did make me realize certain aspects of myself throughout my relationships, that were on a subconscious level.

For instance, I never consciously understood why women in my relationships always ended up asking for change from me, when I claimed to accept them as they were. My passivity ended up having the the women in my life blowing up at me to get a rise out of me. This was a plea for me to stand up for my self, wants, and desires. Instead, I always ended up trying to please the other to keep the peace.

This was a disconnect within myself, due to my childhood upbringing of having an absent father, and an alcoholic mother that did not meet my needs.

As a result, I was stuck in a paradigm which led me to suppress my emotions and believe I didn't need anyone, but without the benefit of having the self confidence to be my own person in tune with what I wanted out of life.

I never learned to be competent man, nor did I have the privilege of being a momma's boy. This led to a lot of toxic shame, making me feel unworthy and just dealing with whatever landed on my door step. This book opens up the possibility of correcting those learned behaviours that you may not be aware of.

Mark Manson's 'Models' draws a lot from this and is also a good read for self development.

RiseAgainst0 · 2015-07-08T15:38:39+00:00

I am currently reading it and for sure it works for me. There is sooo much information in there that you will need to take notes and keep reading your notes in order to make a change în your life. Hope this helped.

rightsidedown · 2015-07-08T17:39:59+00:00

No more mister nice guy isn't about game, it's about unlearning a set of bad behaviors. It can give you much insight into why the "nice guy" is repulsive to women, and separate the idea of being nice or compassionate or caring from the transactional forms of those things that the "nice guy" expresses from a place of negativity. It's not about confidence, approaching, or anything else that gets you started. It applies once you are actually interacting with women face to face.

forgiveangel · 2015-07-08T15:55:31+00:00

I'm rereading it again. I don't feel that all the points apply to be, but it's got me thinking more about what I want and getting myself to stand up for those beliefs. Which could help you in sorting out your thoughts.

If anything it helps give you signs of a "nice" girl and you may realize how needy she is.

gg4444 · 2015-07-08T20:43:38+00:00

It's probably a good idea, but there is no book that will teach you to overcome approach anxiety. You just have to do it. Find a group of guys who approach in your city and join them, if you need to. No book can help you get over this though - you just do it or live with never doing it.

kynka · 2015-07-08T22:17:01+00:00

It is an quite short book so why not read it if you consider your self a nice guy, i just started reading it my self. It feels a bit like a self terapy book with a lot of embaresing exersises (or so it feels for me, a tinman nice guy as it is refered to in the book), where you really need to talk about your feelings and beeing absolutly honest to loved once. But it opend my eyes to a lot of things. It promiss to be able to give you real, closer relationships, but it is definetally not a pick up book.

jouthrow · 2015-07-09T03:49:09+00:00

I definetly recommend finishing it. It's pretty short book, and gave me very good insights about my own behaviour, even tho I'm not nice guy as the book describes it, but I still used to value myself based on others opinions of me.

OlemGolem · 2015-07-11T19:13:07+00:00

Keep reading and then read Models by Mark Manson. Oh, it's already recommended.

No More Mr. Niceguy eventually let's you see some sides of yourself you might never noticed. You can only say "I'm not a Nice Guy" if you've read the book all the way through.

cmiovino · 2015-07-08T19:37:31+00:00

I felt that it helped me. Now, keep in mind, I was one of those guys the book was written for. Literally every line of the book detailed my life.

Does it help with seduction?... If you are a 'nice guy' then yes, it can help diagnose a problem of you wanting to please everyone but yourself (book in a nutshell). This allows some people, like myself, a better understanding of why they don't approach, or aren't direct with women. After reading and thinking about my own life, I realized it's not 'bad' to want women naturally like all men do, something society says is wrong.

I think it can help 90% of guys, even if you aren't a full blown beta nice guy though. Your 'fear' to approach during the day probably has something to do with not thinking it's ok to approach then. Or fearing a girl's reaction. The book would help with things like this to show either aren't really a big deal and you should be pursing them as it meets your urges or needs.

Title	"No more Mr.Nice Guy" will it help me?
Author	mariamanuela
Upvotes	16
Comments	24
Date	July 8, 2015 3:17 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3ck4sf/no_more_mrnice_guy_will_it_help_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/no-more-mrnice-guy-will-it-help-me.1296786 https://theredarchive.com/post/1296786

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