Rejection

canseiDeSerEnganado · 2024-10-09T20:09:39+00:00

You are taking it to personal. Rejection is not a big deal. And for me, rejecting people is way harder than getting rejected. It is more about the person that is rejecting than about you. Take it easy.

theasianplayboy · 2024-10-09T20:41:02+00:00

Did someone call you a Gook or a chink? Did you get a drink thrown into your face or a boyfriend called up to beat your ass or policeman to arrest you?

ProofTimely5788 · 2024-10-09T20:04:44+00:00

Most of my rejections aren't a big deal. Like they just say they have a boyfriend or they ignore me. The approaches I feel the worst after are when I stumble over my words or freeze. I'm wondering if that's what you're really feeling bad about. Because if you have a really smooth approach and the girl still rejected you, would you still feel this bad?

ApartmentWorried5692 · 2024-10-10T01:08:26+00:00

Just because you got rejected doesn’t mean you’re unattractive or unworthy of anything. Dude, I’m white and 6’4” and still get rejected by chicks BUT that doesn’t mean every girl doesn’t like me.

They’re just women, dude. Stop taking them so seriously.

222mykal · 2024-10-09T19:43:27+00:00

Your a student of life ! (At least thats what I tell myself whenever this happens)

Dwerg1 · 2024-10-09T21:35:13+00:00

I have a way to frame it that to me completely removes the negative impact of being rejected.

I just want to have a good time. When I'm talking to a woman I also want her to have a good time with me. I do not want to ruin a good time, so if my presence there for any or no reason ruins her good time I will happily remove myself. A woman not having a good time is not good company anyways and trying to stay in that will only bring myself down, I will have a better time finding someone who does want to play with me.

All I want is a good time and to share having a good time. If someone is to turn me down for that then I can't see how that would reflect negatively on me. My intentions are good, maybe I'm being misinterpreted or maybe my idea of a good time is not in line with their idea of it, but that's not really on me. I'm just doing my best to enjoy life and bring positivity, whatever life throws at me.

So when someone rejects me I do not feel a loss, it does not hurt my ego. I don't want anyone who doesn't want me, I want someone who wants me. I'm doing everything right and I only mean well, I have no reason to feel bad.

Amaran345 · 2024-10-09T21:39:59+00:00

How much rejection hurts depends on your emotional regulation capability, if your self-soothing techniques are on point and your emotional needs are well sorted, you will recover from it fast.

An example of self soothing technique is going to the gym and lifting weights, the release of testosterone will help you go back to baseline emotional state.

Another example is abundance, positive experiences with other girls will help you recover from being rejected.

Talking with a close understanding friend is another technique, rejection will hurt less after talking about it with him or her.

Some guys try to forget the negative feelings with distractions (video games, etc), but they may come back in the form of depression at some point later, due to unmanaged emotions

Successful-Gift3453 · 2024-10-09T21:48:38+00:00

Wrong mindset you have. A rejection is good, which means you get an emotion out of a woman. Rejection means that there is more growth to be taken. Rejection is good, Indifference is bad keep that framework.

Short-Tip3138 · 2024-10-10T01:45:34+00:00

You care, and it matters. I have felt the same way for a long time. Rejection is rejection, and your first thought is "another guy who has what I lack was successful." I have been exactly where you are. It's a jolt. And maybe we take it too personally, but to take it in stride is not easy.

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2024-10-10T06:38:39+00:00

Sounds like you have rejection sensitive dysphoria. I do, too.

One thing that can help is to get off social media. People are way worse on here than the real world, and spending too much time on here can make a person assume that people in the real world are just as awful. They aren't. Digital Minimalism is a great book that can help you get off social media. I left it for nearly a year and was surprised at the tone of everything when I came back. Cyberbullying is the norm here, not the exception, and it fucks with your perception of people.

Find activities in the real world that you can do with other people. Everyone here says to join a gym, but most people work out by themselves so it's not helpful to increase your social confidence. Find a way to do fitness in a group activity, like MMA or a local sport league. Something where you'll have to engage with other people.

You'll never totally get over your fear of rejection, but being around people helps take the sting out of it.

Dandys3107 · 2024-10-10T07:26:46+00:00

Make your mind clear of assumptions and expectations, sharpen your senses towards mood and girl’s reactions, keep your emotions at bay. Some chunk of mistakes and bitterness is unavoidable, but making effort into obvious denial is just stupid. Keep improving your attractive masculine traits and seduction techniques, few successes will cover your rejection hangover very well.

NorCalBull530 · 2024-10-10T13:24:05+00:00

Move on quick. Women don't expect that. They usually think you'll keep pursuing. Move on and she'll try hard to get your attention

Chicagoj1563 · 2024-10-10T23:09:17+00:00

It’s an inner game issue. You can look at it as a skill you are trying to develop.

In game you can’t take anything personally or be reactive to things like rejections. The coaches I learned from would show infields of rejections and they would make it fun. They weren’t triggered by any of it. It was self amusement.

It’s hard, and we are all wired differently. But if it’s hard, that should trigger a light bulb going off in your mind. The hardest things will level you up the most. It gives you the most personal growth . If it’s easy, you’re not really improving. You have to stretch yourself. And it sounds like you are. You just need the right mindsets and some practice.

Outrageous-Error-137 · 2024-10-11T22:31:21+00:00

Rejection is part of the game. Everybody gets rejected no matter how “hot” you are or resources you have. We all have the right to choose. Don’t go around having a pity party. Not for a long time. Because that will welcome more rejection bc your energy is so low as well as confidence. It should only take a couple days to shrug it off.

Title	Rejection
Author	punktfan1
Upvotes	12
Comments	45
Date	October 9, 2024 7:39 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1g004c2/rejection/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/rejection.1532554 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532554

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