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[–]MO_drps_knwldg 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, great post. Complaceny is a killer.
Women are extremely grounded to the present moment emotionally. History doesn’t matter to them as much as you think.
She can be madly in love with you one year, but if you don’t remain in a masculine frame, defer to her too often, and become sloppy, her attraction will plummet quickly.
Never lose sight of the guy you were when you first seduced her.
[–]Hoho2332 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
you are totally right i remember after all the hard work from the gym and change my wardrobe, finally got a girlfriend(ex) from tinder but after that i stopped going to the gym, always rely on my ex, just wanna hang out and have sex with her. i just went back to that comfort zone then she lost interest and broke up with me, i screwed and realised had nothing left. rn i am going to the gym constantly every morning before work, going out cold approaching girls every weekend, try to look the best of myself, please never go back to where you used to be
[–]themostgianthorse 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good post.
When can you quit? When you die.
Enjoy the process!
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
How do you cope?
[–]rmarden 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
What?
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Im not trying to be rude or anything. I mostly agree with your post. I just wonder how you cope. Like do you have any outlet to be vulnerable or honest? I have trouble with that.
[–]riversmoke 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is why it's important to have male friends where you can let your guard down. Heck, maybe even female friends but it may mess with your ability to constantly maintain the frame until it becomes more natural.
To cope: meditation (it will also increase your awareness and help you maintain frame). Read philosophy. Get a therapist (but don't let them talk you out of frame). The stoic philosophy helps a ton.
Remember, if you truly know why you're doing something and you truly want the goal then you don't gain trama from doing that action (unless we're talking extremes here, don't go all psycho). There is no cope at that point. But meditation will help you keep your head on straight.
I personally think it's ok to show weakness and still maintain frame. Admit your faults and fears, just keep your head as you do it.
When you run your mouth too much you'll see yourself friend zoned but that's ok, friends are important too.
[–]rmarden 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Therapist (if necessary), male friends who you can trust, maybe other females. There are few outlets a man can go to if he wants to offload these things. That's why they either get bottled inside or forgotten.
Either way, the frame must be maintained. There is no other way.
"Do not ask for easier lives but for stronger shoulders."
[–]dark_kvothe 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
it’s also about realising that life with all its ups and downs is perfect the way it is. Men who can walk through hell with a smile are men who are indeed happy and at peace with life.
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a coincidence you posted this...
[–]Flow_Scholar 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah that's what I was wondering
[–]JobRevolutionary946 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I wish I had more upvotes to give, I'm sorry that this post has been voted down to the graveyard. Keep at it guys
[–]rmarden -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks!
[–]JobRevolutionary946 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Happy to see it back up✊
[–]AelfredRex 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
So instead of growing with her as a person, you live in constant fear? No.
[–]rmarden 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Who’s living in fear?
[–]AelfredRex 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Fear of showing your emotions. Fear of admitting your weaknesses. Fear of her leaving you if you don't play the uber-masculine act 24/7.
[–]rmarden 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Or instead of living in fear, you can understand the nature of women and society and know they judge men in their own ways, then act accordingly.
If you want to show your emotions, go to a therapists' couch. If you want to show weakness, do it in your own private moments. There is little room for either when the room for error is so thin.
[–]MK2718 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The inspirational side of this is that if you are able to let go of all your prior baggage and change your mentality and behaviors, then there is no reason why you can't instantly become more attractive in the current moment.
[–]bojackhhorseman 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I just go walking and running and study in an online college so I can get a degree on my resume, get a job, and betabuxmaxx. I have nowhere to seduce a woman and ascend from the loneliness because I’m transferring to an actual college campus next AUGUST.
[–]dark_kvothe 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This makes absolute sense. I have always been picky with the type of women I choose but I kinda used to expect women to be sympathetic to my problems and excuse my deficiencies.
Self pity gives rise to complacency and there is no room for it.
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[–]MO_drps_knwldg 22 points23 points24 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Hoho2332 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]themostgianthorse 11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 4 points5 points6 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]rmarden 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]riversmoke 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]rmarden 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]dark_kvothe 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]idrinkapplejuice42 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Flow_Scholar 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JobRevolutionary946 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]rmarden -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JobRevolutionary946 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AelfredRex 4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]rmarden 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AelfredRex 5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]rmarden 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MK2718 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bojackhhorseman 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]dark_kvothe 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link