I see a lot of people on here that talk about being a great opener, good at building comfort but just can't get the girls to make that last leap. It's not like anything goes horribly wrong, you just end up sleeping alone. Recently I've worked with a few people who were struggling with this and have really had them pull a 180 with this advice, check it out. The advice shuffles between dating and meeting people while you are out - so use both where appropriate I guess.

Logistics

  • If it's a date, have her park at your place and go out together.

If you don't do this a lot of times the girl is going to be thinking about how she is going to not get trapped at your apartment with you without a ride. So even when things are going well she is eventually going to think, "if I don't get back to my car I'm going to end up sleeping with this guy" and will flake out just as things are heating up.

  • If you haven't kissed the girl yet, do not say, "do you want to come upstairs" at the end of the date, especially if its dark.

If you are already hooking up and ask, 9 times out of 10 she will accept the invite. But if you haven't been making out on the bar and the walk home, the invitation will raise a red flag for her. It's usually a good idea to have something planned ahead of time to get her upstairs. While you are out mention to her that you just got a puppy and tell her she has to see how adorable it is, or talk about your 500 thread count Egyptian sheets or new tempurpedic pillow/mattress (these are a little more transparent, but still works) and how comfortable they are, or be listening for connections between what she says and shit you have. "You play the guitar huh? Me too, you'll have to show me what your made of when we get back." "You like to paint? Me too, I've been working on this thing forever, you have to check it out." Even something last minute on the walk back like, "I have this stupid goldfish and he swims upside down - you have to see it it's hysterical." is better than nothing. This way its a smooth transition when you get back to your place and you don't have to pull, "so...do you want to come up or something?" This is a question girls are taught to say no to. So unless it's pretty obvious that things are going to get more intense (in which case, why ask? just open your door and bring her up) put something together. Lately I've been buying amazing deserts at an italian bakery close by - these have yet to fail me. At this point I'm just working into the definition of the date if I didn't meet the girl same night, "want to grab some drinks and eat these cannolis I bought with me?" This is gold. Do it.

  • If you ask a girl to come back and she says no, act unfazed and introduce the concepts in the above point then ask her a bit later (after more comfort/seduction) if she wants to come back for a different reason - she'll say yes a lot.

  • (This should go without saying) But actually be ready for sex.

When you are acting a little apprehensive because you forgot to buy condoms the girl will smell your fear and bail. This includes anything that might make you self conscious and having a decently tidy place and bathroom.

Crescendo

This was a big one for me. DO NOT FLATLINE WITH A GIRL. If you make out with a girl for 30mins and don't escalate because you are in the corner of the bar and can't do anything, you are running a high risk that the girl is going to switch from seduction back into comfort while kissing you. You will go from the guy who they are unsure about, mysterious, sublime - to the cute guy they kissed at the club that was real nice. Holy shit don't let this happen. For every girl that I've closed that took over two hours, I've closed 5 in under an hour. Keep the interaction special and once it's on, IT'S ON - don't stagnate. "Let's just get out of here, I want you now" say whatever you have to. Just DON'T sit there and be happy that you are making out and accept that for too long. This goes with anything - I once had a girl I was into become 'comfortable' with me as the guy whose bed she slept in. No sex, just sleep over after we'd party and hook up lightly in bed. This is because I was a freshman in college, and was nervous to make that final move the first time with her. Then once she framed me as 'the guy whose bed she sleeps in' I wasn't going anywhere. You could be the guy she flirts with and gets touchy with at bars, the guy who she makes out with when drunk, or anything else. All that has happened is that you flatlined when you were in seduction and now she interprets that act as comfort. This is almost fucking impossible to break out of (you'd have to seduce her without reverting to the step she is comfortable with) so don't do it. Once things move to the seduction phase, hit the gas like you're the a wheelman and the cops are after you.

LMR

  • When you are taking pants off, grab both pants and underwear and take them off together.

  • Think only about her at first. Take her clothes off and kiss her all over - she will usually reciprocate.

  • A real slick move I've used a few times. Just take your pants off. It works.

There are a few good threads on this already so I won't go into this much more.

Hopefully you guys can apply some of this and it'll work for you. I know it has for me.