Should I hire an escort to make things easier?

sexwhore · 2012-09-02T16:33:40+00:00

IMO, being with an escort will not make anything easier, as far as picking up girls goes. the only thing it will do is get you laid, which, may or may not be a satisfying experience. sounds like you really need to work on your confidence. unless you are hideous, girls in general care more about confidence than looks. lots of guys who are not "the greatest looking" get laid all the time, due to their confidence - and game, i guess.

find out how to work on building your confidence. prostitutes can be great fun, but its not gonna help you pick up girls, if that is your aim.

edit: and now that i think about it - my experience with prostitutes before i was confident with women was not that great. it wasnt until after i developed confidence with women that i was able to really enjoy myself in paid-for sexual situations.

hxthrowaway · 2012-09-02T17:00:18+00:00

Nah, don't do it. I did it. I wish I hadn't.

You've got to be interested in yourself before others will be interested in you. That means getting your body to where you want it, that means being passionate about cool activities, that means to a certain extent not caring if you get laid.

You're 21. Starting working now to be with a cool girl when you're 22 or 23.

Yamaoki · 2012-09-02T17:04:23+00:00

Easy mode doesn't give one the same feeling of accomplishment as hard mode.

acartoontiger · 2012-09-02T19:01:40+00:00

Nobody knows or cares if you are a virgin. If you pay for an escort to lose your virginity you may as well just be jerking off for free.

I understand that it can be frustrating to see other's success when you don't really know what it feels like, but paying for sex is not only depressing but it will also cheat you out of the feeling of real success when you have finally earned it.

It sounds like you are more interested in earning a girl's attraction than in just getting laid. Also I can tell you from experience, nobody's first time is ever so amazing that it is worth paying for.

I advise you to work on your inner mindset. I personally feel that you are depressed and resultantly not very fun to be around. This is the most important thing to work on. You will never attract a girl unless you can be happy with yourself and give fun or value to the situation you are in. That skill will come with practice, passion for interesting things, and the social charisma that comes from having fun and being a happy person.

Without those things, banging an escort will just be an expensive masturbation that leaves you feeling emptier than before. Don't cheat yourself out of your first success story.

Xeonit · 2012-09-02T17:07:54+00:00

Dude. Dude. I turned 21 in the middle of this year. At the beginning of the year I was like you, didnt have any experience or hopes, onyl my ideas. Then, the willpower came. I read some stuff here, catalyzed what I already knew (a big portion of the stuff) and focused on improving my self. In 1 month i lost my virginity and made 2 girls almost fall in love with me (sweet girls, very nice emotional/physical/self-improving experiences, but unfortunately they didnt stay long in my country.).

Now im thinking this:

"Look what you have accomplished in 1 month. Go out there and ~~prove yourself~~ show everyone what you can do! If they doubted you, now they wont. If you doubted yourself, now you wont." You can do it bro!

edit: grammar and stuff

RockyDay · 2012-09-02T18:46:21+00:00

Instead of an escort have you considered hiring a dating coach or professional wingman to help you figure out what's not working?

BenJammin865 · 2012-09-02T18:51:19+00:00

There is really only one fool-proof action that can help with finding a girlfriend/hook up. TALK TO THEM. Are you going to get rejected? Absolutely, but guess what, so has every other guy in the history of the human race. Eventually you'll strike gold. Just go up and talk to them, it's that simple. In the words of Wayne Gretzky, "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take."

lawrnk · 2012-09-02T19:44:08+00:00

Man, I don't think you want to look back and recall your virginity lost to a hooker. What about a girl you might traditionally be less attracted to, and work up from there?

policeandthieves · 2012-09-03T01:39:56+00:00

A recent AskReddit thread:

My mates are considering surprising our 28yr-old-virgin friend to a brothel visit to "get it over with" for his first time. I think it's a bad idea. Thoughts?

The_Music · 2012-09-03T06:13:54+00:00

I'm no expert, but after I reading this thread, I have concluded:

You are not bad looking, and are by no means unattractive physically. Mentally, that is another story.

Before you can expect others to like/love you, you have to learn to love yourself. It doesn't matter how well you hide anything, if you are uncomfortable in your own skin, others will pick up on that, and they will not like it unless they make you a target for manipulation. Both of those are bad. I used to be in the same boat, but after reading lots of "Make-you-think-about-it" articles and learning how to dress and overall like the person I am, things improved drastically.

They always say to people new to fitness that lifting weights/cardio is only half the battle, and that without a healthy diet, you won't get in shape. The same applies to your situation, changing333.

Losing your virginity will not make you feel different, and honestly I think paying for it might make you feel even shittier. Having a successful encounter with a girl is only half the battle, before you even think about applying the rules of Seddit (for pick-up or otherwise), you need to be at least 'Okay' with who you are. To sum that up in one word: Confidence.

We have faith in you. Whether you believe it or not, most of us here who have any sort of success all had the exact same mentality as you at some point.

changing333 · 2012-09-02T17:16:14+00:00

If you find yourself terrified at the idea of success (i.e. you are talking to a woman and she's actually interested in you) and that leads to you panicking at backing out, then yes, get an escort and get over the fears of physical intimacy. Otherwise you'll be stuck in a cycle of failure for years.

Ornery_Goose6019 · 2022-10-13T19:30:20+00:00

Nah thats just being a loser

Bout_It_Bout_It · 2012-09-02T17:38:18+00:00

Get an escort is you have sex hang ups. But it won't help you approach girls. What it may do is subtly get rid of the "virgin" frame of mind.

Plasstik · 2012-09-02T22:11:06+00:00

In short, the answer to your question is "No." Hiring an escort would only be a viable solution to your problems if they stemmed from a lack of familiarity with sex, and they do not seem to.

Having gone through your post history, I've come to the conclusion that you simply have an unattractive personality. Or, at the very least, you present yourself in such a way that your personality comes across as unattractive. I don't want you to get offended by this, because I don't mean it as an insult. Other users have already confirmed that you're not unattractive physically, and you claim that willingness to approach is not an issue. This, coupled with the pervasive air of depression in your posts, leads me to believe that your own negativity may be sabotaging you.

Deal with your depression before you worry about succeeding with women. If lack of success with women is causing your depression, then that is indicative of a lack of proper balance and focus in your life which must be corrected before you can really be successful.

Title	Should I hire an escort to make things easier?
Author	changing333
Upvotes	5
Comments	74
Date	September 2, 2012 4:21 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/z8g3o/should_i_hire_an_escort_to_make_things_easier/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-i-hire-an-escort-to-make-things-easier.1291090 https://theredarchive.com/post/1291090

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