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[–]FrasierandNiles 44 points45 points46 points 7 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
God I needed to hear this so much. Have been chasing a girl like a chode since a week now. I started talking to her a few months ago but nothing sexual happened. Had a chat with her and she said she is just enjoying my company. I started acting despo and jealous after that and I am sure she has picked up on it. Really need to dial it down. Sorry, just venting guys, nothing important to add.
[–]LongNameNoCanSay 8 points9 points10 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I hope the same thing that happened to OP happens to you.
[–]dailymanup 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
If you want to get laid by the hottest girls, then you need to have the right mindset. It's so easy to let all the bullshit in life clutter up your mind. Clear all that shit and focus on what is important: Yourself, your family and your life. Focus on those things first. Get them sorted out. That's the foundation of getting the hot chicks. The techniques in these videos are all about getting your mind right. And getting her crazy attracted to you:
Make Her Crazy Attracted (Instead of Ghosting You)
Mad Social Circle Game To Get Chicks Fighting Over You (In College or Anywhere)
Destroy Approach Anxiety and Approach Any Girl
Pass Any Shit Test (Because it's all a Mental Game Anyway)
[–]Indigoism96 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It’s okay man, it happens to me as well. It gets frustrating sometimes, like just be straightforward with us.
[–]GeeOKeem 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Its okay brother unless told otherwise most guys go through this at some point. I did middle school through junior year of highschool with the same girl and it messed me up pretty bad psychologically. So from now on if im friendzoned thats fine having girls as friends is okay too but thats as far as i take it. All texting asking to hang out flirtation stops. Because they've made it clear thats what they want. Funnily enough, soon after i realized my mindset was toxic and changed i also saw that the girl i was obssessed with was incredibly insecure amd really wasnt all that great but i had convinced myself she was. I put her on a pedestal, very dangerous . Keep your head up bro. Theres gunna be someone out there that'll appreciate what you have to offer!
[–]FrasierandNiles 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Problem is that I haven't been laid in such a long time so my desperation has started showing. And I hate to pay for sex.
[–]GeeOKeem 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Dude im almost 21 and a virgin lpl i completely understand. Shits no fun. I hope things start to take a turn for you
[–]FrasierandNiles 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I am 36 and this behaviour doesn't behoove a person my age. I am not able to decide whether I should just take a step back and start talking to her like I used to when I met her first (less expectations) or should I apologise to her about my recent behaviour and make it official that I acted that way.
[–]GeeOKeem 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Im definitely not a ladies man but if she really has decided shes not interested i'd suggest going out and introducing yourself to some girls. They may reject you but the more that say yes the less itll seem like this is the only girl you could ever want. Abundance is key. Im still working on it myself. But it works
[–]Zic_Zacs 94 points95 points96 points 7 years ago (25 children) | Copy Link
Women are complicated.
Especially in America, if you can play the passive aggressive game just as good, I think you’ll realize it will be a lot less headaches.
[–]learnie 22 points23 points24 points 7 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
What do you mean by passive aggressive game?
[–]tfeyw 33 points34 points35 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Equivalent to mixed signals, I assume.
[–]sasquatchington 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ambiguity
[–]the__chosen1 14 points15 points16 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
more pull than push.
[–]weallwantsomethink 7 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
He used a wrong term.
This isn't passive aggression just a girl who isn't sold on OP.
Passive aggression would be if she would have negative (absent) responses to him to screw with him.
[–]IntoxicatedOrange 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean maybe it doesn't apply to OP's example but american girls definitely act passive aggressively pretty often when there's a potentially sexual/romantic premise.
[–]minimalistforlifeee 22 points23 points24 points 7 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
There’s gotta be a way to sift through all the bullshit and be left with the girls who have somewhat decent intellect. Playing games is just...dumb. Idk how to spot them though at least not yet.
[–][deleted] 7 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]minimalistforlifeee 3 points4 points5 points 7 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Same they are always past all the drama and realize for themselves it’s not worth it and they missed out or whatever but I wish they could relaize it sooner or younger girls could observe and learn from older women’s mistakes. What do you mean okay their game? Play along ? From my experience someone who doesn’t like playing game isn’t good at it anyway
[–]IntoxicatedOrange 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What if the actual reason is because beyond that age they feel their sexual value is declining, and they no longer have the leverage to get away with it so they have to be more direct instead?
[–]minimalistforlifeee 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I never had considered that but it totally makes sense. So basically it’s all a game and you can’t truly escape it? It could be both. I unfortunately don’t have enough personal experience to tell but I wouldn’t be surprised.
[–]IntoxicatedOrange 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I don't know, haven't really dated anyone over 35, but it's a possibility.
[–]minimalistforlifeee 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah maybe
[–]Jermaul_m_w 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
It’s not necessarily a game. It’s just not putting a woman on a pedestal, and understanding that a woman only enhances your life, and doesn’t create love within yourself. Girls just don’t like guys who come off like they’re going to have to be the center of a guys world if they progress forward.
Some guy posted in a top thread and said a woman said to him along the lines of, “you seem like your life is so fulfilling with or without me in it and I just want to be a part of it”. It’s not exact words but basically the same. Women just want to know they aren’t the top of your priority list ya know
[–]minimalistforlifeee 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t know that :( so to escape playing games you just have to not take the game so seriously ?
[–]Jermaul_m_w -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It just comes with time. Either you be bitter about it because you don’t understand how women work, or you understand that women don’t want a man for anything other than security really. It’s the unfortunate truth. :/
I used to be bitter. Now I see through that. I still don’t understand but I want to. No man can provide a woman security. She can walk out on the road and get hit by a bus and I can’t do anything to stop it. So I can offer a false sense of security but that’s just both of us playing false games. If that’s the truth than it is indeed unfortunate :( thanks btw 🙏 I appreciate the back n forth
[–]Jermaul_m_w -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Not security physically. Women are designed biologically to create and maintain a family, and the biggest stress that comes with raising a family is finances. If she can marry someone who can remove that burden and help her create a good family; then that’s the guy she wants. It may not have always been money in society, but men have always been the provider while the woman is the one to take care of the family and I don’t see it ever changing. No problem man I love talking to people who share the same sentiment that I used to and want to get out of it
Ah I see. In that case I do still think age is the biggest factor
[–][deleted] 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Nemesis_Bucket 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This.
Went on a date with a girl recently. 2 weeks ago actually. She will text me to the point where it's annoying. Then if I try to suggest a meetup time it gets overlooked or w.e. She says she thinks I'm cute and seems so overly excited about me.
I don't have time for a maybe tonight because I have FWB's. So a maybe is a no and I'm moving on because MY TIME IS ALSO PRECIOUS.
Rinse and repeat the flakiness more than a couple times and they're not legitimate excuses.
Be direct in those cases
[–]jakkaroo 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn. You just put some shit in perspective for me. Thanks man.
[–]Qrioso 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
They are even more complicated married
[–]Zic_Zacs 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
God help us all.
[–]weallwantsomethink1 point 7 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Not complicated.
When you feel you are chasing or getting mixed signals. The girl just isn't sold on you. You are still an option most of the time. They haven't made up their mind.
If you had 2 dates and this happens your game usually sucks.
In this post the girl OP was chasing lost that option and felt regret.
[–]ThePurpleStuffedWorm 64 points65 points66 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Honestly probably some of the best advice here. Too many posts on here boil down to "GeT AnY gUrL wIth tHIs OnE wEIRd trICk". Fact of the matter is, there's no cure-all. Just enjoy your life, and enjoy meeting new people who are worth being around. Don't worry about fucking every last hottie in existence.
[–]Tyrion69Lannister 20 points21 points22 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You’re basically saying “don’t worry about it” in a subreddit built on worrying about it.
[–]Dallas_Stars_Fan 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What you resist, persists. - Buddha
[–]PM_Me_OK 37 points38 points39 points 7 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
She could have asked you if you liked her still because 1. She seeing you with another girl, especially better looking, sparked her interest or 2. She saw you with another girl so fast she genuinely wanted to know if you still liked her or that you moved on. In a way that verifies to her a more accurate picture of how most guys think. Might be called gageing.
[–]SCBASEBALL6 26 points27 points28 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I see number 1 being more likely. If she didn’t have any interest she wouldn’t have bothered asking.
[–]minimalistforlifeee 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Guaging?
[–]spencerworth 10 points11 points12 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Gauging?
[–]Tyrion69Lannister 12 points13 points14 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Gayjing?
[–]minimalistforlifeee 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How do you spell gauge. But with an ing at the end? The way she spelled it? If so I never knew that lolz 😂
Number 2 might be why. She said that she wanted to know because shes never seen someone move on so fast, and wondered if it was just a "little crush". Which isnt the case. From past expereience i just learned to let go of feelings relatively quickly.
She continues to say however that she was having second thoughts about her decision to be friends and i didnt respond
[–]huey764 12 points13 points14 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So then how am I supposed to get laid?
[–]Jovan1000 7 points8 points9 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Haha heck yea bro
[–]bigcblogger 7 points8 points9 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Amen. WAY too much advice out there advocates trying super hard under the guise of little tips and tricks. In reality, if you’re doing your own thing, a girl’s going to make up her mind pretty quick how she feels about you.
She’s either down to be with a guy like you or she’s not. And if she’s not, there’s nothing you can to do to force it. No sense in playing these games. Life is too short. Good on you for realizing it man.
[–]snapyobagels 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The second they realize you have other options or that you might not like them anymore, they lose their goddamn minds lmao
Not just women though, a lot of men are like this too. People generally want what they can’t have and then become disinterested when they have it or it’s too easy. Best thing you can do is literally not care, because that stands out the most and makes you more desirable.
[–]VastDeferens 8 points9 points10 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Are you in high school?
[–]Tyrion69Lannister 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is happening in college too
[–]ramokaly 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It happens post college too. Some girls are just very immature regardless of their age.
College. "D" is in my friend circle
[–]BrainsApplied 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yups, this is how it works... They are really good at sensing whether you're interested or not. By a great guy, but don't chase them to much, that doesn't work.
[–]gdmfhgi5 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As a straight guy it is only fair not to chase the D
[–]kellykebab 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I mean, imagine how pathetic you have to be to check up on someone you already rejected to see if they still like you.
Being the pursuer isn't always bad.
I asked her why she was asking and she said she was havung "second thoughts" i didnt respond
[–]jusdiffy 16 points17 points18 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Do me a favour and don't ever talk to D ever again. She lost her chabce and she needs to know that
Unfortunately enough we work together -_-
[–]jusdiffy 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Even better. Act like you couldn't care less about her. But when you need to talk to her for reasons within the scope of employment, be emotionless and talk as if you don't know her personally. Then she'll realise what she lost.
[–]Tribetter 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol. You're gonna put in the effort to be emotionless to a girl because you weren't her cup of tea? Stop being a little bitch, women don't owe you anything either do you. If bring nice to her comes naturally then do that.
Don't go around acting
[–]CuriousWafer 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Straight to the point...
I like you honesty bro. Keep it simple, dating websites/social magazines will only make you feel less secure about yourself. In rare cases they may contain a few nuggets of wisdom. Rock on.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
That’s not true. You have to chase or you won’t get anywhere. The key is to just not look desperate and make her try as well. Obviously if you are walking with a hot girl she’s going to want you as she thinks she has lost something worth having. Girls want what they can’t have, probably why they want a unicorn.
[–]GeeOKeem 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Super true! I more meant if a girl says shes not interested dont waist your time tying to get her to be when theres 50k other single girls in your city. You def cant just sit and wait for girls to pop up
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah If she actually says she’s not interested I wouldn’t give her a chance if she came back to me. Just shows she liked you for popularity or something and not for you.
[–]TheLoveGuardian3 points 7 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Here is the alternative to chasing in one video:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Gsnwym2r408
[–]PLS_PM_ME_PUSSY_PICS 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I needed this, was seeing my coworker but she just lost all interest in me, never wanted to do anything together and would constantly blank my messages. I asked her one last time when I went to her city that I was passing through on a night out with friends if she wanted to come out and she said no. I thought fuck it, I've had enough of being treated like shit and chasing this girl I'm moving on. I've been out clubbing and tinder and pretty much just been a fuckboy since and I feel much better.
Know your worth fellas, don't become a beta for one girl.
[–]tractorinballs 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Guy stops chasing the D is able to get women.
[–]Bcsaldi18 -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
man fuck this shit. women and their stupid games.
i'm gonna stay r/ForeverAlone
[–]BLKMERC -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Friend zone weirdo
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[–]FrasierandNiles 44 points45 points46 points (8 children) | Copy Link
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[–]weallwantsomethink [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]minimalistforlifeee 22 points23 points24 points (12 children) | Copy Link
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