Radicalizing the Romanceless

Reginleifer · 2014-09-10T07:07:05+00:00

Yes, but so what? Henry apparently has something else, let's call it "sexiness", and it shouldn't be a great surprise that sexiness cannot be reduced to niceness.

Henry beats women!! He cheats on them! He beats them after they get mad at him for cheating on them!

And yet Henry gets laid..... Scott gets the lecture? This is one of the strongest arguments for red pill behavior I've ever seen. I want to get laid, not lectured to. 0.o We should all be Henry! (Not really)

Personally I find nothing wrong with asking why someone worse than you is living it better. Shit's old as the bible, not even MRA/red pill at this point.

ThorLives · 2014-09-10T07:13:15+00:00

I read it and agree with it. It's so irritating how 'nice guy' has now become synonymous with 'entitled'. It's almost as if, on one level, women feel sad that someone can be a decent guy and lonely, but they aren't attracted to him, so (to alleviate the cognitive dissonance), they go full-scale war and demonize him - to the point of making up imaginary flaws. "Entitled" has become the flaw du jour.

This kind of rubs me the wrong way, especially his comparison of the need for sex with the need for employment.

He's making an analogy. It seems nit-picky to complain about stuff like that. Besides, the "need for sex" is not really about the "need for sex". It's about companionship, a relationship, feeling loved, not feeling unattractive and all kinds of other things. Funny thing about men: we don't just care about sex. One thing to note about gender-based slurs is men's desires are reduced to "wanting sex". It's the easy way that we demonize men. "He's just trying to get into her pants", "He's white-knighting in hopes of getting some", "Men only want one thing". They're all just phrases we use to vilify men, as if men have no emotional desires or needs other than "want sex". Personally, if I had had no success with women over the years, I think I'd be pretty close to insane due to wanting some affection for so long and not getting any, and I wouldn't think the comparison to employment would be all that strange. I'm not sure how old you are, but if you had no success over your lifetime with the opposite sex, wouldn't it drive you crazy? People like to treat affection like it's a luxury - like wanting a big screen TV - but it's not. Hell, I've heard of prostitutes who get hired by men and then don't have sex - the guys just talk to them for an hour or two.

Yes, but so what? Henry apparently has something else, let's call it "sexiness", and it shouldn't be a great surprise that sexiness cannot be reduced to niceness.

Well, according to RedPill philosophy, nice is antagonistic to the trait of 'sexy'. One of my female friends told me once that 'nice guys are boring, women want to find a bad boy and tame him', which just suggested to me that if you do the "right" things (pro-social behavior), then, well, "no good deed goes unpunished".

cuittler · 2014-09-10T12:32:25+00:00

We will now perform an ancient and traditional Slate Star Codex ritual, where I point out something I don’t like about feminism, then everyone tells me in the comments that no feminist would ever do that and it’s a dirty rotten straw man, then I link to two thousand five hundred examples of feminists doing exactly that, then everyone in the comments No-True-Scotsmans me by saying that that doesn’t count and those people aren’t representative of feminists, then I find two thousand five hundred more examples of the most prominent and well-respected feminists around saying exactly the same thing, then my commenters tell me that they don’t count either and the only true feminist lives in the Platonic Realm and expresses herself through patterns of dewdrops on the leaves in autumn and everything she says is unspeakably kind and beautiful and any time I try to make a point about feminism using examples from anyone other than her I am a dirty rotten motivated-arguer trying to weak-man the movement for my personal gain.

I'm in love

roe_ · 2014-09-10T12:08:52+00:00

This kind of rubs me the wrong way, especially his comparison of the need for sex with the need for employment.

Honest question: why does this rub you the wrong way?

SirNemesis · 2014-09-10T15:43:45+00:00

This kind of rubs me the wrong way, especially his comparison of the need for sex with the need for employment.

Sure, sex is slightly less important than employment on Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

hyperrreal · 2014-09-10T14:33:34+00:00

There was an interesting article awhile on RoK, about that incident where Nash Grier (a Vine star) got an insane amount hate and pushback after making a video about the kinds of girls he was attracted to. To his credit, he was honest. But it was a huge mistake in terms of his image, because he and his friends say things like

Then they move into more contentious territory: Caylen criticizes girls with “fake tits,” while Grier dislikes girls who are “obnoxious and loud.” Then the boys talk about physical appearance, favoring girls who are short and petite, with “natural” looks and “really good smiles.” They criticize girls who don’t shave their facial and body hair, implying that “peach fuzz” and other types of natural hair on women is “gross.”

Grier also tells girls that “the chase is such a big part” of what makes a girl appealing, encouraging them to “play hard to get.”

The author points out how sexually desirable Nash Grier is/was to his teenage girl fan base. And how important it is for someone in this position, who is benefiting from the relationship with these admirers, not the threaten the 'fantasy' they build up in their minds about him. His success is based on a "fantasy relationship" these girls invent, that is torn down if he verbally disqualifies them by saying he is into petite girls with great smiles. Many if not most of his fans are not like this physically and they know it.

The next move in the article is to establish how successful male celebrities avoid disqualifying women this way at any cost, by saying they like "nice girls" or girls with similar values, basically anything vague enough that almost anyone could think "omg that's me!" We might calls this the B.O.B strategy, after the singer who does exactly this with his music.

I think there is something similar going on in the post you link to (which I thought was really interesting), and with the Nice Guy™ issue in general. My experience with women is that they are more honest with each other about who and what they think is hot, then they are with men. Women seem to be intuitively aware of the PR reality that Nash Grier was ignorant of.

Women in general are more desired for their sexuality, and benefit more from their sexuality and attractiveness than men do. This isn't good or bad, I just see it as a real phenomena. The premise I want to advance is that male anger about "Henry" is basically the same as Nash Grier Vine followers anger about his preference for cute, petite girls. Women seek to both benefit from their sexuality in various ways, and to avoid male anger which feels threatening and they are afraid of.

To accomplish these goals, women as a group have pursued the B.O.B strategy, and in the past it has worked. But the cat is out of the bag, now that more and more men are aware that they Niceness does not equal sexiness. And many men are reacting out of anger. It's illogical, but totally understandable.

StabbyPants · 2014-09-11T04:56:06+00:00

Henry apparently has something else, let's call it "sexiness", and it shouldn't be a great surprise that sexiness cannot be reduced to niceness.

read the actual article - what he's saying is that henry is objectively a piece of shit who is successful. Hell, this is one of the major themes: the tension between the henrys of the world and the not-bastards.

adrixshadow · 2014-09-10T10:40:23+00:00

On an offtopic I love the stats that manosphere didn't exist before a few years ago and yet you see in this subreddit posts about how women dated TRP and how awful they are.

Phokus · 2014-09-11T00:46:49+00:00

I find Nice Guys^{^TM} use niceness as a way to cover for cowardice and a lack of personality.

Nice is not enough. Sometimes in life you need to be mean to be nice, and do Nice Guys ^{^TM} do that? Not really.

Are you going to say anything when a mutual friend is being an asshole to another friend? Or are you just going to stand there and hope it all blows over so you don't have to stick your neck out for anybody? What a nice guy, not rocking the boat at all. So nice.

Are you going to have hard conversations with people because you both have legitimately reached an impasse, or are you going to pretend to ignore it and vent your frustrations passive-aggressively? No mean ol' confrontations! Just simmering resentment 24/7! How nice!

Are you going to wait and lure a girl into being in a relationship with you under the guise of a friendship, or are you going to be honest about your intentions? If not, falling in love with you would almost feel like sinking into quicksand - she'll never see it coming! Nice.

Nice is not enough. Nice isn't smart, or interesting, or funny, or original, or creative, or romantic, or brave, or charming, or anything. Nice is the bare minimum. It's like going to a job interview and telling your interviewer that you can read.

Title	Radicalizing the Romanceless
Author	AshleyYakeley
Upvotes	12
Comments	55
Date	September 10, 2014 5:34 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/2fzc9x/radicalizing_the_romanceless/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/radicalizing-the-romanceless.284911 https://theredarchive.com/post/284911

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