im a complete pussy, please help

whitiker53 · 2018-04-17T02:48:31+00:00

I know this is probably not the answer you’re lookin for but you can start by not calling your self a complete pussy.

If you’re like me, you tend to conflate self-deprecation with virtuous humility. When really we’re just attempting to make light of our rampant inner critic that fucks our shit up. Better to act like a cocky asshole to balance the scales

redd_reality · 2018-04-17T02:48:40+00:00

Stop it.

You're not a pussy.

What you're doing is comparing yourself to archetypal Chad, who doesn't exist.

Not man approaches every woman who gives him an ioi or who he finds attractive, the moment he becomes aware of her.

Social context is such a massive fucking component in game and I barely ever gets brought up.

Easing social interactions by having valid context makes it easier on you and ESPECIALLY easier on her. If you don't know a girl and have never spoke to her, a smile and saying hi is all you have to do! Small steps! She expects this! The guy who comes up to her trying to put his cock in her mouth five minutes are meeting her, is the guy who she knows is desperate.

Stop thinking in terms of giant steps necessary to fuck that girl and think about what would be considered socially smooth. Start with saying hi, how is your day. Next time you see her, add a little more and escalate a little more. Do it slowly. Sure, make yourself a little uncomfortable, but if you're shit tying your pants because your expectations are so high, she knows! And she's gonna be weirded the fuck out. Chill hold frame and most importantly, enjoy the interaction!

1dondraper · 2018-04-17T02:47:19+00:00

There's nothing we can really do to help you. It's all on you.

You're going to die, got that? You've only got one life, and you're wasting it away on some pathetic insecurities and fears.

Make the decision to take these incredible risks and conquer your fears unapologetically.

stoicstephen · 2018-04-17T09:56:57+00:00

Do you lift? - It makes your animal self come through (testosterone).

Do you meditate? - It takes your mind out of your mind, and into your body (you don't get cold feet).

Do you do nofap? - It makes you sexual as fuck, so much that when you are with a girl, you have no choice but to touch her.

I was just like you until the end of the last month, and what got me through "pussy" phase were these 3 points.

Oh, and girls are as/ or more sexual than you, that's why that other girl initiated kino with you, because she was tired of waiting for you to do it.

Go for it man, you won't die, and if you do who cares.

chasebandz01 · 2018-04-17T03:06:13+00:00

you're never going to be "ready." you just have to stop being a bitch dude. just do it even if everything psychologically is screaming at you to stop. you might fuck up, but you'll realize its not as bad as you envisioned it in your mind. it never is.

always try to be escalating. touch her, direct the conversation in ways that makes her go through emotions (no boring shit like economics, etc).

i want to emphasize: you will never be "ready." every time i approach a girl i have a sense of "oh shit." everytime.

Swanniie · 2018-04-17T04:41:05+00:00

FUCKING LIFT MORE, GOD DAMMIT.

the_real_lunch_box · 2018-04-17T07:28:57+00:00

you are fearing rejection. even when you are sure you won't be. You need to start taking risks and take the fear head-on. Ease into it by using kino, a touch on the shoulder becomes a touch on the knee, then becomes a touch on the inner thy. You will become more relaxed and comfy when she doesn't resist your touch.

ichivictus · 2018-04-17T03:40:16+00:00

Think of every approach you do as a win. Rate it 100 out of 10 just for doing it. Doesn't matter how it ends. It's a win since you are taking action.

With more approaches you will get better at escalating.

And don't beat yourself for not approaching. Recognize the mistake and do your best not to repeat it.

The fact you came this far and you are getting iois sets you apart like at least 80 percent of all other men. Congrats.

thesmithofwords · 2018-04-17T05:28:35+00:00

are you me?

Reven311 · 2018-04-17T05:02:09+00:00

I think perhaps if you got drunk before another date it might help loosen your ass up. Alcohol lowers inhibitions, and if she is drinking too, that's a good thing. It's really not hard to lose the V-card, and once you do maybe you will stop with this silly attitude. Take her to a bar, get her drunk, then take her home to fuck or just fuck in the car perhaps. Do something.

kostas783 · 2018-04-17T09:14:14+00:00

Rejection is better than regret

Ontopsoon · 2018-04-17T09:14:23+00:00

"Every human is who they are, because of the dominating thoughts which they permit to occupy their minds."

You're the problem kid. This comes from within. You're not going to change if you first don't allow yourself. Get rid of the mental block. It won't happen overnight, but you'll steadily see yourself improve. Visualise the calm, confident man you wish to be. Be like him. At first, fake it until you make it. I've attached a couple videos to help you understand

https://youtu.be/hJLxJhMstrg https://youtu.be/e3jwYzxnqv0

Jsieijejeieokkd · 2018-04-17T10:04:38+00:00

It’s like Nike says, just do it! Grab her kiss her and tell her you want her. She will fall in line.

daymi · 2018-04-17T11:44:54+00:00

It takes a long time for your unconscious to catch up.

What I do is I "watch" myself passively and find out what I do wrong and why (what feelings were there in me). Later on I fix it in the next interaction.

You are not ready.

Nobody is ever completely ready. Wing it. You'll NEVER have complete information on anything in life. You think the others aren't winging it? They are. Failure is the only way to grow. If you only do things you are good at you won't improve anything. What do you do when you fall? Stand up again.

I went to the movies

Bad location if it's a main movie theater. You can't do shit with all the people around. Whose idea was that? To save the situation, go for a walk with her afterwards. Say "Let's go for a walk" as you walk out of the movie theater.

If you absolutely have to do movie theater, take the seats in the very back. P.S. If you don't kiss her a bit for a greeting, I'm gonna personally come over and kiss her myself. It's 2018, a kiss is no big deal. Motivated yet?

only managed to escalate slightly verbally and null physical with only her sometimes touching here and there.

Hold her hand (I hope to god you sit next to each other - otherwise it's hopeless). Better than nothing. Movies SUCK as a date.

affraid of fucking up since this is an easy lay...

There are several billion women in the world. She is not that special.

P.S. Carnival is great for a date. Move around, stick with one attraction for 10 min, move around to next attraction etc. Take her hand from time to time like it's not a big deal (so she doesn't get lost in the crowd - I even do that to female friends-not-lovers sometimes).

stiffmiester786 · 2018-04-17T09:13:05+00:00

workout, lift and eat clean maybe a martial art(thai boxing or bjj) will boost your confidence and make you less of a pussy and approach new people everywhere you go

stiffmiester786 · 2018-04-17T09:24:11+00:00

workout, lift and eat clean maybe a martial art(thai boxing or bjj) will boost your confidence and make you less of a pussy and approach new people everywhere you go

insanity_wow27 · 2018-04-17T11:54:36+00:00

Just learn to be direct with what you want. Women appreciate it. There is a time for nuance and a time for directness. Like someone commented above your time on this earth is limited and it goes quick. You don't want to look back at all the times you sat near a woman missing your chance. Take a few risks! He who dares wins.

Elitevaz · 2018-04-17T12:48:41+00:00

"I just am affraid of fucking up"

That's the root of your problem. Fear makes a pussy out of you. Stop being scared of fucking up and do as you please. Take the risk and stop giving a fuck.

Casd12 · 2018-04-17T22:46:54+00:00

You're not a pussy. A pussy will never admit that they're a pussy, that's what makes them a pussy.

It's hard to get a ball rolling, but you need to keep pushing that ball. Eventually it'll start to roll and it'll only get easier and easier.

RexPillerson · 2018-04-21T08:06:33+00:00

What you need to do is go out and take a bunch of Ls. Go up to as many women as you can in a might with the sole purpose of approaching, gaming, and learning. If you approach 10 women in 1 night and fail with all of them wouldn't you consider that better then not trying at all? Know that if you do fail it's not a reflection on you as a person, it's a reflection on your game and her state of mind. Even the most alpha Chad you've ever met had tried and failed with women. You don't think Brad Pitt has been shot down before? Abundance mentality means that trying and failing with a woman WILL happen, but it doesn't matter because there are plenty of other women who would love to fuck you.

SergiuIlescu · 2018-04-17T09:08:11+00:00

Simply, go to a prostitute and loose your virginity, your whole perspective will change

Kommanderdude · 2018-04-17T13:34:22+00:00

How old are you?

Cmdrj-nice · 2018-04-17T04:34:40+00:00

I think you need to do some self reflection think about your journey.

Title	im a complete pussy, please help
Author	PotatoWatt
Upvotes	42
Comments	35
Date	April 17, 2018 2:32 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8ct8n6/im_a_complete_pussy_please_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/im-a-complete-pussy-please-help.674 https://theredarchive.com/post/674

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