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Hammocknapping Archive

View 7 posts and 913 comments by Hammocknapping on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

It is sad that you avoid your problems instead of solving them.
/r/RedPillWives18/12/20 04:41 AM
13

I mean your husband is actually the problem because he’s incapable of graciously accepting a gift. This is a simple thing that all adults should be able to do. Your children are also adults and know that their father is incapable of graciously accepting a gift, so why are the fanning the flames by telling him the gift was your idea? Overall, it seems like both parties have been coddled for far too long and this is the mess you have. Honestly, if I were your kids I just wouldn’t buy my father a g…
/r/RedPillWives18/12/20 04:08 AM
4

Your kids are the problem though. Who the heck buys their parent a gift and then says some version of “Well, other parent said I had to.” No, when you give a give you accept full credit for the gift giving.
/r/RedPillWives18/12/20 03:38 AM
8

Him: Why did you buy this? Kids: Mom said you needed it. No offense, but your kids kinda suck here. My dad is similar in that he doesn’t like me to spend money on him, but when I do (and even if it was my mom’s idea) my response is just “because I wanted to.” If he protests and says it’s too much I gently remind him that I spent my money not his, and that money isn’t a concern for me. I don’t know why your children are so afraid of your husband that they can’t just say they bought the gifts beca…
/r/RedPillWives18/12/20 02:28 AM
12

My husband has no issue being vulnerable with me, and when he is it does not impact my attraction to him. In fact, often a we end up having sex immediately after (when he’s ready) because the physical connection builds upon our emotional one. BUT, I think it’s important to have your expectations right for your partner’s response. I have happy to listen, comfort and provide empathy, but I am not in a position to actually help my husband deal with any of the issues he’s experiencing. Like sure I c…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/20 08:56 PM
37

My husband has been a serial philanderer for most of last year. He has an active tinder profile where he asks girls to come f*** him in his office at 3 am. He drinks all the time. He has multiple women on speed dial and has had love affairs with hookers. He is also on the brink of losing his job. He has totally checked out of our marriage. I’m scared we’re done. This was 292 days ago.
/r/RedPillWives15/12/20 02:49 AM
1

I mean that’s not what my husband does all day, but I can why it would be an issue for you if that’s what a SAHH did. I kill it at work compared to other professional my age, particularly other women, because when I come home it is 100% down time (or more time to work). No one else I know, but even men with SAHWs have as much free time outside of work as I do. I can be all in at work because I have basically 0 responsibility at home, which is a luxury few have. My husband accomplishes way more t…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/20 09:36 PM
1

I mean my husband plays his fair share of video games. We actually play a lot together when I’m home. If he’s getting stuff done, I don’t really care how he spends his downtime.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/20 09:11 PM
1

You don’t need to have a FT job to be interesting. My husband stays at home, but he’s incredibly busy between stuff around the house, his volunteer work, his sports leagues and his other hobbies. It would be laughable if someone called him boring.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/20 07:48 PM
0

Absolutely. This is kinda my current life. My husband has already met his FIRE date, but I’m a high earner so I’m make more than what he currently has banked in my career. So, he’s totally financial independent though so the specifics don’t really matter. Honestly having a SAHH is great, and I wouldn’t read it for anything. I always get a little disappointed when my husband picks up a project and works from home.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/20 07:45 PM
5

I think this is the right answer. I personally don’t try to base my success on whether or not I’m happy at any given point, because happiness comes and goes. Instead, if I’m capable of independently meeting all my needs (shelter, food, clothes, etc.) and I feel generally satisfied with my current existence then that’s enough. I’m very driven so I cherish those moments of contentment because they don’t last long. Men and women both die in the end, so how we live really is up to the individual per…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/20 03:04 AM
15

Based on what you’ve written, it appears you’re using erotica and porn as a crutch. Can you go a month without it and remain just excited to have sex with your husband every single day? If not, then you have a problem and need to find a way to stop.
/r/RedPillWives27/11/20 02:35 AM
27

Yes. The wall absolutely applies to child free women.
/r/RedPillWives24/11/20 10:35 PM
4

Buying a home without an agent doesn’t mean buying one without an attorney or inspection. I have a couple friends who are attorneys and licensed realtors, any chance you can find an attorney like that in your area?
/r/RedPillWives24/11/20 08:49 PM
1

As you’ve noted before, you view “older” as 8-10 years older and are disgusted by women who are attracted to men 15+ years their senior. So, you’ve already totally missed the mark on my post because as you can see I was talking about a 5-8 year difference max. In my little UMC bubble, there’s only one couple where they are the same age. Otherwise the husband is older than the wife by on average 2-3 years. My husband and I are in the high end with a 5 year age difference. I don’t know any woman w…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/20 04:56 PM
2

That’s not my personal experience, but I know not everyone is surrounded by former frat bro types. Also, just knowing myself and my husband there’s a huge difference (personality wise at least) between who we were at 21 and now (I’m late 20s and he’s mid 30s).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/20 03:06 PM
1

This is purely anecdotal, but at least in my social circle if you’re not partnered up with a HVM by 25 then you’re going to have an incredibly difficult time finding one. By the time women hit their late 20s, most of them are showing signs of aging AND they are incredibly bitter. Men in their late 20s and early 30s can easily pull girls in the 22-25 age range, so they have no use for women their own age. Having a good source of income, food support system and hobbies will not make you more physi…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/20 02:29 PM
1

Again, my husband isn’t a stay at home parent. We’re child free. He stays at home because he’s retired. I don’t know any stay at home wives who take care of the tasks my husband does. Is doing full level renovations feminine? What about making sure we have the best looking house on the block by maintaining our lawn, irrigation system, pruning bushes and trimming trees? Is moving all of our furniture and shampooing the carpets feminine? My husband does whatever he wants each day, but I’d hardly c…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/20 01:47 PM
1

Most SAHMs I know are total SJW slobs who want to have their cake and eat it too (and their husband’s cake and their neighbors’). My husband isn’t a SAHD, so the role he fills is very different from the role a stay at home parent fills.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/20 10:53 PM
1

My husband stays at home because he is retired. We’re FIRE oriented, so he was able to retire and stay home earlier than most men, but prior to retirement he was a member of a high powered, male dominated profession (still is but practices very, very selectively). I think I made it very clear that my husband is the exception, not the rule. I know a SAHD who is an injured veteran. His wife is able to support their family on her salary (plus his benefits), so he stays at home to catch up on the ti…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/20 10:51 PM
4

Is there any way you can sign your daughter up for daycare 1 or 2 times a week? I had a nanny growing up, so I was mostly at home, but even a nanny needs time off. So, it wasn’t uncommon for me to go to extended group play dates where another parent or nanny was supervising a group of children. Also, once I was in preschool I started going to “after school” club, which was basically a chance to play pickup games of sports with other kids. I think it was really important for my social development…
/r/RedPillWives16/11/20 06:49 PM
2

For starters, I didn’t generalize. I shared my own personal experience with specific examples. It is 100% true that the other SAHH/Ds my husband knows are all of the soyboy archetype. Now, there are certainly men who don’t got that archetype that are staying at home, but in my experience they tend to be in between jobs and not looking to make a “career” out of staying home. I have a couple of friends who would like to be SAHMs, and they are absolutely lambasted by my more “RahRah You Go Gurl” fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:46 PM
2

I mean, our house is probably over 3x the size of your apartment, plus we have a large lot to maintain, all of the tools and appliances that go with it and our vehicles. Here’s what a usual day in the life of my husband is: 5AM - take out dog and tell me to get up 6:30 AM - head downstairs and make breakfast and coffee. Clean up from breakfast, do any dishes that may have been soaking from last night’s supper, clean rest of kitchen 7:30 AM - take dog for first walk of the day. He usually lets th…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:37 PM
9

Staying home isn’t for sissies.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 01:52 AM
7

Honestly, it depends. My husband stays at home and he’s busy around the house for a solid 8 hours a day. I’m usually out of the house for at least 10, so he still has plenty of time to workout and enjoy hobbies, but maintaining our home is still a full time job.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:20 AM
14

He’s just a SAHH, but we have a lot going on so it’s still a full time job. I think men who do stay at home tend to slide into it. They lose their job (or quit due to frustration) and end up staying home when they can’t find something else. I also think they struggle to not view home time as fun time. The other men we know who stay at home are all about fun and not about actually doing the work to manage the house. No stay at home spouse will be successful if they don’t do the work of managing t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:18 AM
5

Ugh is everyone online oblivious to pop culture references?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:05 AM
6

Big dick energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/20 12:01 AM
28

You just have to ooze masculinity. My husband stays at home and he manages our home. When I say manages I mean he gives it his all 8+ hours a day. We have the best looking, most efficiently run house on the street and he’s incredibly proud of it. He’s also really involved in the community, his hobbies and he’s sexy as hell. Most other SAHH/Ds in our area are total losers. Like the definition of a soy boy, overly tight skinny jeans and all. They aren’t handy around the house and can barely fulfil…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/20 11:42 PM
2

I did watch the video, ma’am, which is why I know that Venker openly acknowledges that this set up does work for some couples. So, your blanket statement that marriages set up in this manner will necessarily fail misses the mark completely. My husband manages our large home and land in a way that I never could. We have the best yard in the neighborhood, the cleanest garage, there’s never a dish in the sink or a stray sock on the floor, and he has breakfast and a homemade latte ready for me every…
/r/RedPillWives14/11/20 11:23 PM
0

I did leave a comment, but then removed it. You don’t have any experience with marriage, so it was clear the comment would be lost on you.
/r/RedPillWives14/11/20 06:09 PM
0

Never mind. I read your post history and learned there’s no point in commenting on this.
/r/RedPillWives14/11/20 05:30 PM
-2

Yes. I’m self supporting, so while extra income would of course be a bonus, it isn’t necessary to maintain the lifestyle I choose to lead. Also, there’s not something that’s so special about me that I deserve to stay home just by existing. My husband is just as capable, if not more, as I am I’m regards to maintaining our home. What can I do that he can’t that he shouldn’t have the option to stay home if that’s his wish?
/r/RedPillWives14/11/20 01:17 PM
3

My experience is based on my husband and I being one of dozens of couples from our class.
/r/RedPillWives06/11/20 02:54 AM
5

Edit: law school isn’t actually conducive to finding a spouse, most law school students don’t tend to couple up I strongly disagree. Law school is a great way to meet HVM. Not only do you have the opportunity to meet other law students, but also young attorneys and students in other grad programs the school offers like pharmacy, MBA, MPH, MPA and med school. Unfortunately for OP, it will be difficult to find a HVM in law school, because she’s likely 5-7 years older than most of the men in her 1L…
/r/RedPillWives05/11/20 12:35 PM
6

You’re correct, that I could have tried less in school, not played sports, not worked, not been involved in any extra curricular activities and instead focused all my energy on video games. I also could’ve given up having friends irl and spending time with my family to spend more time playing video games. I prefer to accomplish tangible things, but my husband’s happiness is important to me. While happiness isn’t tangible, it certainly has a real world impact on my life. When my husband is happy,…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/20 10:35 PM
12

When I was in high school, undergrad and grad school I didn’t really have time for hobbies like video games. Between my full class schedule, sports, school based extracurriculars, clubs outside of school and work the little free time I had was spent socializing with family and friends. Because no one in my social circle, family or friends, played video games it wasn’t something I was drawn to getting into on my own. The time I spent with friends usually centered around another activity and when …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/20 07:21 PM
5

They’re looking for honesty that fits their narrative and nothing else.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 06:40 PM
3

You got me. I’m just dying for the anonymous internet validation. So, no I won’t delete my post.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 06:27 PM
3

I DON’T KNOW IF I’M IN THE WRONG. THAT IS THE WHOLE POINT. like what benefit are the all caps?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 06:21 PM
7

How is that a justified answer? I honestly don’t even know if it counts as cheating. I believe I was single at the time, but this certain ex certainly labeled me as a cheater.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 06:16 PM
11

Is it cheating if you’ve attempted to break up with someone multiple times and they refuse to accept it? If it is, then I cheated because I wanted to move on with my life and find someone who wasn’t such a drain on my existence.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/20 06:10 PM
1

Sounds like a personal problem, honestly. You can always change employers, become self employed and self insured or find someone who can afford their own health insurance.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 08:43 PM
1

I’ve always had employer provided health insurance, so I don’t know anything about the marketplace. Generally speaking, when my husband was working (retired now) it was always, always cheaper for us to have two separate plans. I can’t imagine that would be different on the market place. Again, other than the ability to file joint taxes (have you ever heard of the marriage penalty?) there’s nothing you get through marriage that is reserved for only married couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 06:30 PM
1

Probably because the designation form the patient fills out requires them to provide information about their designees. Typically, it’s full name, address, phone number, email, DOB and relation. They ask you those questions to verify your identity. He could have written “Family friend” or “Son’s GF” on there and they would have honored it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 06:16 PM
1

You add them as a domestic partner. Every single employer I’ve ever had allows for domestic partner benefits. If you’re using the market place, then you’d probably get better rates as two individuals anyways.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 06:14 PM
3

Let’s think about it this way. I’m pregnant and going to give birth. I’m allowed to have 1 person with me. Does the baby’s father have to be my husband to be that one person? No, he doesn’t. I could bring in my BFF from high school that I haven’t seen in years, and the hospital would allow it. A patient can designate anyone they want to receive their medical information. No one cares about you’re relationship to the patient, they just care that the patient has stated that you can be present and …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 06:12 PM
7

You can absolutely provide medical insurance without being married, and it is no more complex than claiming a spouse as a dependent. There are also creative ways to limit the tax impact of leaving your estate to someone you aren’t married to. Again, even married people need to have wills, and setting up a trust is no more complicated if you’re married or not. Additionally, there’s no guarantee the current system will stay in place, so why bet that it will? There’s already an attack on generation…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 11:55 AM
1

While that’s true, I think the main reason women don’t like “gamers” is because we’ve been taught that someone who identifies as a “gamer” is most likely a lazy POS who lacks a career and lives in his mom’s basement. I never played video games before meeting my husband, but have always been more than happy to try if he invites me. Turns out I love it and now it’s a shared hobby.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/20 07:05 PM
14

Can you please edit your post to conform to the posting guidelines? We have so little info it’s impossible to give advice.
/r/RedPillWives27/10/20 01:29 PM
1

First, I don’t need cash, prizes or status from my husband, so those things aren’t of value to me. I provided my husband with cash, prizes and status. Through me, he’s been able to retire early because I provide him with health insurance and I’ve introduced him to a number of connections that allow him to take on projects that he enjoys and dedicate himself to his hobbies full time.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 08:31 PM
5

What value does anyone provide if they don’t have the “parts” their partner desires? If my husband was the exact same person, but had a vagina, what value would he provide me as a partner? I’m not looking for a partner with a vagina just like my husband isn’t looking for a partner that doesn’t have a vagina.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/20 08:05 PM
3

I probably have a little more leeway because (1) I’m already married and (2) my husband is very self aware and (3) he knew I was direct and blunt from the first night we met, but I would honestly just ignore this issue all together and not be there for the complaining. My husband is someone who will complain and complain about things that bother him, but needs a nudge to act. I don’t know why he’s that way (I think it’s part of being a middle child who was always subject to the needs of both you…
/r/RedPillWives22/10/20 04:06 PM
2

Personally, I would highly, highly recommend doing a lash lift and tint. I now look like I’m wearing mascara 24/7 and my lashes are so much healthier.
/r/RedPillWives20/10/20 09:42 PM
2

Only OP can clear that up, and I’d be happy to revise my advice based on more detail. I still don’t think she’s given examples of specific incidents, which are important to offering next steps.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/20 11:50 PM
0

It sounds like he does talk to her, just not about what she wants to talk about. What I took away from her post is that she wants her husband to come home and ask her about what she did all day. She needs him to initiate that conversation in order to feel loved. Then, after she lists what she’s done she wants her husband to praise her verbally for doing her job as a SAHM. What’s not clear is why exactly does she need that from her husband and if she even offers that for him.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/20 10:48 PM
14

Okay, so it seems like the main issue isn’t actually his indifference but that you do not feel like you are getting the verbal affirmations and validation you require. First, I think it’s important to reflect on why you need so much external validation. Why isn’t your own sense of accomplishment from keeping a nice home enough? Next, I would ask you if you’re treating your husband the way you want to be treated. Do you greet him with a smile everyday when he gets home from work? Do you tell him …
/r/RedPillWives16/10/20 07:16 PM
4

Can you give a couple of concrete examples? The post is pretty vague.
/r/RedPillWives16/10/20 04:40 PM
13

Can you elaborate on why your mother is living with you, where she resides in the house, and what all she helps with? Edit: Also, just to clarify, is the the same man you initiated divorce with 4 years ago? If so, that will really change the advice I’d give.
/r/RedPillWives11/10/20 08:20 PM
1

How about this study on hand washing. I don’t think a study is necessary to know that if you don’t take care of your skin, that there’s an increased chance you’ll show signs of aging as you age.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/20 01:50 PM
6

I would recommend finding a therapist or counselor to talk to. Personally, I don’t believe we should ever utter a negative word about our husbands to friends or family, which is why I’m recommending a professional. I recognize that it can be cathartic to vent about your husband, and sometimes that may mean being hyperbolic or negative. That’s okay, but should be reserved for someone who is objective, which your friends and family are not. If you’re husband asks why you’re seeing someone, just te…
/r/RedPillWives10/10/20 02:24 PM
5

True, but they’re great when you need the extra length!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/20 06:53 PM
3

Yes. My husband is one of those “real men don’t need sunscreen” people, which is why he has a forehead full of wrinkles and I have none. I’d do anything to convince him that sunscreen and moisturizer aren’t “girly crap.”
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/20 05:25 PM
7

Marital bliss for my husband and I requires maintaining separate bathrooms. We do share a California King, but having separate comforters is the only thing that makes it enjoyable. My husband is very firm in his belief that couples must share a bed. He even expects to sleep together when sick, which I find absurd and is the only time I really push to sleep separately.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/20 05:22 PM
6

If a guy has a six-pack he can wear rags. Maybe if he’s only interested in bottom feeding dumpster sluts. My husband looks like an entirely different man when he’s in his yard work outfit and a suit. This is a man that oozes raw masculinity, but looking like a homeless man doesn’t suit him.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/20 05:18 PM
7

As long as you're well groomed, hygienic, take some care with your skin and have some good perfume you're good to go. A lot of men are not even meeting this basic level of self care though. It isn’t noticeable when they’re mid-20s, but you can really start to tell around age 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/20 05:13 PM
4

I know not all men are this way, but my husband is also one that either wants 100% all in enthusiastic sex or he would just rather pass. He is so committed to enthusiastic consent, that he truly does prefer that I initiate like 98% of the time. Some men are all about just getting it in, but one of the things I love best about my husband is that he’s all about quality over quantity (which honestly just makes me want to initiate even more).
/r/RedPillWives01/10/20 11:16 PM
7

I’ve never stopped being a “bitch.” I still have boundaries and I enforce them. Even now as a married woman, I’m not going to drop everything and run to my husband unless it’s a true emergency, because he wouldn’t do that for me. As an example, my husband plays in a sports league. One summer, it seemed like every time he went to play a storm would pop up and we’d loose power. He still went to go play and left me at home in the dark (we didn’t want to leave the pups alone without power and a/c). …
/r/RedPillWives01/10/20 11:13 PM
9

Why are you letting your guard down after one measly month? The first month my husband and I were dating, we probably hung out less than a dozen times. That’s not enough time to know someone and start playing the submissive wife! I can count on one hand the number of times I texted my husband first before we started living together and got engaged. And, out of those times 1 or 2 were pre-arranged. Heck, I didn’t even save my husband’s number in my phone, so I wouldn’t be tempted to text first. I…
/r/RedPillWives01/10/20 09:24 PM
1

Have you ever looked at her thumbs though?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/20 06:31 PM
13

So, slightly different take, but I can tell you where my husband was when he decided to retire and stay at home in his early 30s. We live a FIRE (financially independent, retire early) life style, so there’s no debt in our net worth equation. From time to time, we do take on strategic debt. For example, we have taken out a car loan to take advantage of special pricing, but paid everything off before any interest was accrued. When my husband decided to retire, our home was completely paid off, we…
/r/RedPillWives28/09/20 02:16 AM
1

I would just encourage you to ensure your SO has an abundance of time to spend with his friends alone. We have the largest home out of our friend group(s), so people tend to hang out over here. I always make sure the house is less than 15 minutes away from being company ready, and never in a state where I’d be super embarrassed if someone showed up unannounced. Obviously if I’m working on a project or have stuff all torn up to go through and organize things, then unexpected guests will just have…
/r/RedPillWives26/09/20 08:02 PM
1

It’s really a shame that /u/flatwormmm deleted the post before your comment could get read.
/r/RedPillWives25/09/20 12:38 AM
2

I’ll say it again: If we’re truly looking for something more than what our base instincts require, then we need to look past AWALT and instead examine the ways that humans are generally fallible and how that manifests in different groups.
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 11:18 PM
1

I am ignoring the TRP noise, because I am a woman commenting on a woman only* sub. But, here I am a women commenting on a woman only* sub about AWALT, which doesn’t actually lead the the desired introspection. Why are we talking about it when TRP isn’t? Can’t we learn something from that difference? *I realize this sub isn’t truly women only, but certainly the men are very few and far between.
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 10:57 PM
3

Huh? Where did I say anything about what you should be concerned about? Why are you looking to TRP in the first place? They're a group of men talking to men about how to get women. The fact that they talk about AWALT and not AMALT means nothing to us. But it does mean something. The conversations occurring on TRP are an important piece in understanding male nature. It’s like looking at monkeys in a zoo to learn more about how those monkeys may act in the wild. I said that the men at TRP are not …
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 10:48 PM
2

Why shouldn’t I be concerned about male behavior? I work in a heavily, heavily male dominated profession, I have male friends, most of my family members are male and I have a husband. Heck, just the sole fact that men make up 50% of the population is enough reason to be concerned about male behavior. This is a group of women talking to women about how to get men. Why are we taking about AWALT? We want to understand men so we know how to act in order get them to share their resources. Why would w…
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 10:30 PM
12

Search the main TRP sub for the term “awalt” and you’ll get hundreds (maybe even thousand, because search results are weird on mobile I couldn’t tell). Search the term “amalt” and you’ll get like 10 posts all of which are 2 or more years old. The concept of AWALT is important, but it isn’t more important than AMALT. So, why is it that AWALT comes up in nearly every post on TRP theory, but AMALT is never discussed? I have faults because I am human, not because I am a woman. No perfect person exis…
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 10:13 PM
1

Marriage is a three way contract. Person 1 and Person 2 agree to have the government recognize the legal status of their relationship at the cost of giving the government the right to handle, without any restriction, how the contract can be dissolved. Here’s the things you can do without legal marriage: 1. Get engaged 2. Purchase and wear wedding rings 3. Have a wedding 4. Go on a honeymoon 5. Change your name 6. Own property together 7. Have a shared financial strategy 8. Ensure the other perso…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/20 09:04 PM
4

I believe it was a male participant who started that part of the discussion, which is telling. Look, my own husband has displayed “violent” tendencies. But, there’s a huge difference between punching a hole in the wall and dragging your wife around by her hair and bashing her head into a door frame. I’ll accept some responsibility for a hole in the wall, but I would not feel comfortable accepting responsibility for a black eye or concussion. Not all men are of the caliber where they can recogniz…
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 04:22 PM
5

I did not get an explanation of my permanent ban, so I am assuming it comes from my comments on the thread titled “A recent traumatic experience has left me confused. I need help.” I never recommended that the poster leave their SO, but did call out how the new rule made it difficult to give the advice I felt was appropriate.
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 02:47 PM
6

Well I’ve now been permanently banned for following the new rule. They clearly only want a very select few individuals participating.
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 05:51 AM
7

We rarely went out even pre-COVID. I love to cook and there are very few things we can’t make at home that taste better than our local restaurants, so we usually reserve dining out for trips. Two of our favorite things to make at home are both typical bar foods: nachos and pizza. If we’re looking for a super duper easy Friday dinner my husband will get a take and bake pizza and we will doctor it all up with different toppings. I’ve been very lenient with myself as far as diet goes lately, becaus…
/r/RedPillWives20/09/20 03:23 AM
9

Yes, but I’m in a position where I’m not financially dependent on my husband. Anything my husband provides is a bonus for us, so I get to value him for who he is and not what he earns.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/20 03:12 AM
12

The mods have clearly stated their belief and intentions. As was noted, it appears that in order to truly “get it” you need to be personally mentored by the mods and have received a marriage proposal from someone they have vetted as a HVM. If you found a HVM on your own, then that’s not good enough, because (1) they can’t guarantee that you used TRP tactics of their choosing to get the marriage proposal and (2) they haven’t vetted the HVM themselves so they don’t truly know if you “get it.” The …
/r/RedPillWives19/09/20 04:24 PM
0

How is mom a hypocrite? Mom clearly tried self love, because she’s old enough to have a child who is aware of how she looks. But, self love didn’t work, so she had a cosmetic procedure. You just assume that no parent in this situation would openly discuss what was happening with their child. Mom could easily explain to the girl that she’s has been trying to practice self love, but that ultimately she decided on surgery. Mom can enroll the girl in therapy to help her make a decision on her own as…
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/20 03:54 AM
0

By your logic, you can’t tell a child not to drink, engage in sexual activity, or even give them a bedtime. Cosmetic procedures are an option for adults. No amount of preaching self love is going to change that. So, it’s important to educate children will be responsible. Just because you don’t believe in braces, Botox or boob jobs doesn’t mean a child wouldn’t choose to do those things. But, if you shame them about body modifications than may seek them out on the black market.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/20 12:00 AM
2

It’s a reality that cosmetic surgery is available, and children need be aware of reality. If a child has insecurities regarding their appearance, then their parents should immediately enroll them in therapy. Being honest that surgery is an option for adults is better than lying to a child that there’s no way to change their appearance. I also think that rhinoplasties are a terrible example, because I know several people who have had them done as a part of sinus surgery or to repair a broken nose…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/20 06:32 PM
8

I would recommend H2Ocean. Also, something they don’t tell you is that you need to be very careful what you wear for pants. Very loose fitting dresses work really well and I would recommend making sure nothing you wear covers or rubs the piercing for at least 8 weeks. Also, sex can really mess the piercing up because there’s a lot of rubbing and sweating. If you have a partner, then sex may be off the table for several weeks.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/20 10:38 PM
3

This account has zero history of partaking in mens’ red pill spaces and constantly gives terrible advice. Why have they not been banned??
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/20 05:39 PM
5

Easiest "hack" is to get a sports mouthpiece and wear it when you are not obligated to talk to anyone. Garbage. Absolute garbage.
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/20 05:36 PM
0

Using a dishwasher uses less water and soap, and sanitizes dishes better than when they are done by hand. You just need to invest like maybe 30 minutes every couple of weeks to clean it.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/20 08:39 PM
0

Honestly, it sounds like you just don’t know how to care for a dishwasher. You need to clean the dishwasher, including the filters regularly. Additionally, it’s important to use high quality detergent tabs and rinse aid. Your dishes were greasy and covered in black flecks because you weren’t taking proper care of your dishwasher, not because dishwashers are incapable of getting dishes clean.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/20 01:40 PM
3

Honestly, I’m just shocked that you know like 50 men who are dating women without dishwashers..
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/20 08:36 PM
1

I would rather marry an uneducated waitress (she knows how to work hard, knows how to deal with difficult people, and has to work under pressure.) Educated women tend to have easier jobs and don't know what it is like to hussle and work hard for that 2 dollar tip. I fail to see how these work ethic and education are mutually exclusive. Just because someone has a college education, that doesn’t mean they’ve never worked a service job. Additionally, the development of traits like hard work ethic, …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/20 02:00 AM
1

You take issue with the notion that people can enjoy, or at the very least tolerate, their jobs? Or, do you just take issue with the ability of women to be self supporting by having a job?
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/20 07:25 PM
2

Why not brainwash women to work their ass off and pretend its liberating to sit at an office from 9 to 5 all your life Do you take issue with office jobs generally, or just when it is women working?
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/20 03:58 PM
1

I took OPs use of the word “homemaker” to mean a SAHW/M based on the context, and the fact that “homemaker” is defined as “a person, especially a housewife, who manages a home.” I don’t think OP is saying that men are reluctant to voice their desire to have a wife who helps clean, organize, decorate and furnish their home. Personally, I’ve never met a man who stated they wanted a wife that didn’t do a single thing around the house (except for like the one happily married couple I know who keeps …
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/20 07:27 PM
4

How does this translate into men wanting SAHW/me though? You can easily be domestic and build your home together while your both still working.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/20 06:35 PM
12

This is a point that isn’t made enough. My husband’s been super busy with his passion project lately, and hasn’t been able to do as much as he normally would around the house. So, tonight while he was out of the house I decided to tidy up and do a good cleaning too to bottom. I was able to tidy the whole house and do a good clean on the first level (vacuum, dry swifter, mop, dust and clean the kitchen and powered room), plus run laundry all in the 3 hours he was gone. How was I able to do this? …
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/20 02:35 AM
3

[T]oday ... work is seen as self-actualization for the benefit of the woman alone. While I can’t disagree that this applies to the women who post Instaham photos with hashtags like #bossbetch and #werk, I don’t think that it is the case for women who work low wage, low skill and/or service jobs. Most women work because that’s what’s best for their families. Having a SAHP is great if that’s an option, but food, rent, utilities, clothes and healthcare aren’t optional. Not every woman with a job ha…
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/20 01:36 AM
5

They’re allegedly just a stay at home something. No kids.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 09:10 PM
9

Ah, so not only do you know very little about history, you also don’t understand the limitations of insurance. Probably could’ve learned a little about both in college and the work place.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 08:58 PM
11

Sorry, just a couple of questions here. First, even before the Industrial Revolution, it was common for when to bring money into the home. Women would weave from home, make other goods from home, sell excess produce and other animal good, or work as domestic labor. During and after the Industrial Revolution, it was common for women to work in factories and other businesses outside of the home. This doesn’t even begin to touch on families where one or more spouse participated in forced labor. So,…
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 08:30 PM
10

So, I’m confused. He’s said he wants to buy a house together in about a year (typical length of a lease) and wants to have children, but wants to make sure you’re married before you have children. So, it seems like he wants to find a home together, get married and then have children. So, what’s the issue again?
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 05:19 PM
9

I was in a sorority in college, and while I’m not a loser in the looks department, I regularly went out to parties and bars with women that were absolutely more objectively attractive than I was. But, I was often the life of the party because I’m funny and friendly. I know how to tell a good story and ask the right questions to keep the conversation going. Personally, I didn’t partake in hookup culture in college, so I wasn’t concerned if guys weren’t flirting with me or hitting one when I went …
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 04:34 PM
1

It sounds like you broke up because you shattered his trust by snooping on him. So, its possible he already views you as manipulative, and saw this as another attempt to draw him back in and just gloss over what you’ve done.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/20 03:01 PM
8

I love my husband dearly, but I honestly don’t know if I could have survived 6 months in a 1 bedroom apartment (that’s not a reality for us, but is for many couples) where he was the only person I could interact with in person. I don’t need a lot of space, but I can’t imagine not being able to have any time what so ever to myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/20 06:23 PM
3

We’re UMC as well, but I would say our social group is made up of both MC and UMC couples. Something to note, is the women I know who are SAHW/M who do have clean homes actually have a cleaning services that comes at least once a week. Are you sure these families aren’t also hiring outside help? My husband comes from a family with a SAHM, but they also always had Au Pairs and a cleaning lady that came several times a week. Now his mom is was incredibly hard working, but it would have been a lie …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/20 06:21 PM
15

Honestly, I’m not sure how you can vet a partner to ensure that you can tolerate spending 24/7 with them for 6+ months straight, while also not being able to have in-person interactions with anyone else. Also, combine that with having to work from home for the first time ever (at the same time as your spouse) and maybe also having to watch children and serve as a teacher. Personally, I’m thankful that I’m an essential worker which means I still go into work every day (and most weekends). I’m als…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/20 06:07 PM
1

I certainly haven’t been in every household that has a SAHW/M, but at least in our social group most of the houses I have been in are always war zones. There are toys and half eaten cookies scattered throughout the house, and it looks like no one has cleaned in years. These families often eat fast food or takeout and the children are unruly because they’re “never say no” households. Additionally, these women still demand their husbands do an equal (not equitable) share of the housework and child…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/20 05:51 PM
3

Nah, I didn’t feel the need to be so cliche. My husband also used to frequent the same store (it’s a chain that’s recently closed many of their mall stores as part of restructuring) and the male associates were always more than happy to help him no matter how he was dressed. I think it’s funny when store associates are too stuck up to help someone, and since I can always order online I never, ever approach associates. Personally, I’m not a boycotter. I still buy from this store even though I fre…
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/20 11:52 PM
4

The higher they perceive your social value to them, the more likely they will act in a manner to try to extract that value from you. This is the real answer right here. Most likely, it has nothing to do with the fact that OP was dressed in a feminine manner, but simply that she was well put together. Best story ever: I was overhauling my wardrobe, and wanted 3 full suit sets (skirt, pants, suit dress and blazer) in black, navy and grey. So, I went to the store to try everything on to make sure I…
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/20 07:46 PM
1

Step 1: CeraVe Renewing SA Cleanser Step 2: Dr. Dennis Gross Alpha Beta® Universal Daily Peel Step 3: Fresh Kombucha Antioxidant Essence Step 4: SkinMedica TNS® Advanced+ Serum Step 5: SkinMedica Vitamin C+E Complex Step 6: SkinMedica Instant Bright Eye Cream Step 7: Clinique Dramatically Different™ Oil-Free Gel Step 8: Urban Decay De-Slick Oil Control Setting Spray Step 9: SkinMedica Total Defense + Repair Broad Spectrum Sunscreen SPF 34 (Tinted) Step 10: If I want more coverage than just the t…
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/20 07:11 PM
9

Sounds like you should start by calling CPS.
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/20 06:53 PM
1

My husband already had his life together As much as a 30 year old preying on girls 16 and younger can have his life together.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/20 03:38 PM
0

So, according to the article: HVM = 6ft, have ripped abs, jerk confidence and a fancy house and car LVM = Nice guy, as described in the quotations It’s almost like there is no variation in the definition of HVM and that there’s no average value male in between HVM and LVM. I consider my husband a HVM, but he comes just shy of 6’ at 5’11” (I’m very, very petite so he’s still waaaay taller than I am), so I guess he isn’t high value? My husband doesn’t have “ripped abs” but does look like this, so …
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/20 05:13 PM
5

That’s not 50/50.... If I bring home $100/week and my BF brings home $200/week and we each put in 50% of our take home pay, then I’m putting in $50 and he’s putting in $100. 50/50 would be me putting in my whole paycheck while he puts in $100 or him only putting in $50. Put another way, if all our bills are $100/month, going 50/50 would mean we each put up $50 regardless of how much we make. In a marriage, where all income is marital income, a couple would need to make exactly the same to actual…
/r/RedPillWomen03/08/20 01:35 AM
3

First, OP acknowledged her BF had a good income. Is that enough to support a family of 4 or 5? I don’t know, but it also doesn’t matter because he doesn’t have a family, just a girlfriend. Being full supported is a benefit of being a wife, and a wife she is not. It’s no secret from my post history that I’m UMC and that I’ve only ever dated UMC men. All of these men were more than able to support a family income wise, but none of them had any interest in doing so. All of them men I’ve encountered…
/r/RedPillWomen03/08/20 12:59 AM
7

Wanting to go 50/50 (which by the way never actually means a true 50/50) does not mean one partner couldn’t support the family on their own. My husband could easily provide the same exact lifestyle we currently have on his own. His preference that I continue to work and cover some of our expenses doesn’t change that. In fact, it means that we live a much more stress free life because we have so much financial wiggle room.
/r/RedPillWomen03/08/20 12:19 AM
9

My husband is just a little older than your BF and already retired, so our finances are very unique. I pay all of our day to day living expenses, including groceries, eating out, clothes, etc. I would also pay for any vacations (if we ever travel again!) and other entertainment costs. My husband owns our home and covers monthly and yearly costs like our utility bills and property taxes. When someone says they want to go 50/50, it really just means they expect you to contribute financially. I’ve …
/r/RedPillWomen02/08/20 06:53 PM
37

You aren’t married, so it is not his role to provide for you. Refusing to pay for dates (or even your own food 🤦🏻‍♀️) is not a good look and is not appropriate for a situation where you don’t have combined finances. I knew my husband could pay for all our of dates, but I happily paid 50% of the time and routinely bought groceries and extra gifts. Knowing he’s able to provide for you should be enough.
/r/RedPillWomen02/08/20 05:53 PM
7

Get a steamer. Way easier and honestly more effective in my opinion. Also, I don’t know what dress shirts your buying, but even when both my husband and I were wearing suits 5 days a week we rarely had to steam/iron. It was generally just spot treating if a collar or something dried funny.
/r/RedPillWomen31/07/20 08:04 PM
2

I do provide my husband with health insurance, but that availability will vary employer to employer. Even if we were legally married, we would file separately anyways, so that’s not really a concern for us. You can set up as many protections or as few as you want. That’s the flexibility that a private marriage affords.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/20 12:09 AM
2

So, in our case, we have a series of legal documents (wills, trusts, PoAs, advanced directives/living wills) that ensure our assets are handled the way we want them to be in the event of incapacitation of death. We also keep separate finances. My husband owns our home outright, and I don’t contribute to its upkeep in any way shape or form so as not to co-mingle. I’m planning on purchasing my own separate property soon, which will be an income property and vacation home. I do provide my husband w…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 10:33 PM
1

No, because I hold his POA and I’m his health care proxy in accordance with his advance directive/living will. We resign this documents yearly, so his statements of intent are always up to date and recent.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 09:33 PM
3

We have plenty of paperwork. I have all the same rights and privileges as I would if we had entered into an unnecessary contract with the government, except I file my taxes as a single person. Taxes are literally the only difference, and that’s actually a benefit for us based on our financial situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 06:59 PM
-2

It only comes up when I file my taxes, which based on our income is actually better for us as a unit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 06:39 PM
4

Yep, legally I’m single. I don’t need the government in my bedroom. It’s a wonderful feeling actually knowing your husband loves you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 06:38 PM
6

My husband and I wrote our own marriage contract so we aren’t bound by our state’s divorce laws. I have many, many more rights than a girlfriend (will, trusts, PoA, medical directive power, etc.) Unlike someone in a legal marriage, I know my husband loves me and wants to be with me, because leaving wouldn’t cost him half his net worth.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 06:30 PM
3

As someone who regularly posts on RPW and is constantly told I’m just a POS plate because I have a private marriage, they are at no risk of being convinced marriage is just a silly piece of paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 05:50 PM
2

Who needs an insanely large mortgage in order to have a yard?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:50 AM
-2

Probably, but not always. Success does not have to equal money.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 11:41 AM
22

Whenever I’ve heard this phrase it’s used more like “I want a man who knows what he wants out of life.” Put another way, they’re looking for someone with purpose who is goal oriented aka successful.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/20 12:17 AM
1

rolls eyes In order to look similar to this (I’ll never have that exact ass, because I’m not about to have a Brazilian butt lift with implants) I have my diet dialed way in along with practicing IF (OMAD plus 5:2 and regular longer fasts) and work with a personal trainer. My husband looks like this while eating Taco Bell multiple times a week and drinking beer every day. He works out and plays sports, but is no where as strict about his regime as I am. Heck, he hasn’t been able to play sports fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 05:34 PM
2

It varies greatly. If I weigh under 120, I start to look very ill. I’ve pushed it to 115 before, but my face thins out too much and looks gaunt, my collar bones stick out sharply, you can see my spine and hip bones, but technically that’s still a healthy weight for me if you follow the BMI scale. I have a friend that’s the same height as me and she weighs between 105-110 and looks perfectly healthy. I’ve never had a guy ask me to step on the scale and see how much I weigh. Instead it’s all about…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/20 04:07 PM
5

No. You literally said exactly that, and you also edited your response. I asked if it was acceptable for a husband to leave his wife if there was a total lack of intimacy and you responded with “Absolutely.” Sure vetting is great and all, but anyone who is married knows you can’t vet for everything. Specifically, no matter how well you vet you’ll never be able to know exactly how your partner, particularly your sex life, will be impacted by kids.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/20 11:36 PM
6

Yikes. So the wife can absolutely be ice cold and never show her husband any intimacy (no sex or touching of any kind and no romantic affection) and the husband should just grin and bear it? That’s incredibly sad.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/20 11:14 PM
12

Would you tell a man that a total lack of intimacy in a marriage was a bad reason to divorce his wife?
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/20 09:33 PM
2

I have sufficient protections in place that I don’t worry about my husband or my friends taking advantage of my assets, so I guess that’s where we differ.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/20 01:38 AM
2

You list so much more than that. Based on your original list, you can’t talk about your childhood experiences because it could give clues about your wealth. You can’t talk about where or even if you went to college because it may gives clues about your wealth. You can’t talk about your job or even what field you work in because it could give clues about your wealth. To expand upon it, you would have to have a special wardrobe that you wear on dates, maybe even a cheaper, beater car, and you coul…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/20 01:26 AM
2

Very interesting. I’m in a private marriage, and therefore can’t access any of my husbands assests, which is nice because it also protects my considerable wealth. I never tried to hide my financial standing from him because it is pretty obvious just by observing how I dress, what I drive and where I live. I guess I just can’t imaging having to constantly live a life of mystery and leave so much out of conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 11:53 PM
1

Do you lie if asked a question?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 10:45 PM
3

criminal records I mean for the most part this is public information. When I was dating I always ran a criminal background check before I went on a first date. I even ran one on my husband knowing he couldn’t be in the graduate program we were in if he had one. For example, I screened out men with numerous traffic tickets because it showed low impulse control.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/20 08:59 PM
2

It certainly doesn’t happen every day, or even often, but sometimes I accidentally left go of the trigger and get some water on the mirror or pull my toothbrush out too soon and tooth paste goes fly. It’s a rare occurrence, which is why I’m happy to quickly wipe things down to help my husband out.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/20 11:44 AM
2

Do you use an electric toothbrush and/or water pik? It happens haha
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 11:30 PM
1

I think this type of set up is very common when one spouse stays at home. I don’t do the outside yard work (I help when I can, but it’s mostly my husband), but I still do all the cooking and meal planning. I also take on most of the administrative role like managing bills (easy peasy thanks to our cc and online banking), setting up services and maintenance, doctors, vet, taxes and registrations and research for purchases. If I had to really think about it, I do the research and get things queued…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 09:29 PM
3

That’s fine, and I think those are important discussions for couples to have. I only bring up these examples because they are two things my husband has asked me to do that make his life easier, and to me that’s enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 06:00 PM
7

I don’t think any of the examples I’ve mentioned even go into different standards of cleanliness, but I would agree that’s likely true. Again, not true in my situation because my husband has a much, much higher standard of cleanliness than I do. For example, I don’t think that placing your dirty cloths in the hamper when you take them off is “standard of cleanliness.” Instead, I would state that it is the most efficient way to handle dirty cloths. Same goes with wiping the counters in the bathro…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 05:30 PM
6

I’m not a fan of generalization, but I will say that I’m speaking to my friends and observing their relationship dynamics, the majority of their SOs miss the small things. It’s like men see right thru the every day messes and then freak out at their partner when it’s comes time for a deep clean. But, if they took that 20-30 minutes a day to keep things at a good level then everyone would feel less overwhelmed.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 05:18 PM
23

I think you’re over estimating how much time chores take. To make things easier, we’ve purchased a vacuum for each level of our home and then have a special thing that cleans hard surfaces like all our hard wood and tile. I 100% realize that’s not an option for everyone. We also have a big bucket in each level that’s filled with all the cleaning supplies you need to dust and clean. Small little things like this make a huge difference. If my husband needed help and asked me to vacuum the main flo…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 03:37 PM
20

So we should just accept people being lazy and messy/dirty? So much for TRP and self improvement. Should men just accept their fat wives because their wives just can’t lose the weight?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 03:18 PM
23

And, if a man finds himself in that situation with his wife, I’d just encourage him to pick up the stray sock when he sees it and wipe down the bathroom counter quickly on his way out the door. The little things that don’t take a lot of time really add up. When my husband and I both worked, we would take 30-60 minutes while dinner was in the oven to power clean. We worked as a team and our house was pretty much always spotless and uncluttered (unless we just got home for a trip haha). I work a h…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 03:14 PM
30

That’s why I said that I don’t think the actual expectation is a true 50/50 split. If men simply took more effort to be aware of what’s going on around the house and helped keep the clutter and mess to a minimum, I believe their wives would report that they do an equal amount of chores (even if that’s technically not the case). Doing small, one off incidental chores goes a very long way. To this effect, even female breadwinners report doing more chores than their husbands. Again, I’m not in this…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 03:02 PM
93

I am not in this position myself, but I think for a lot of women the ire comes from feeling like they can’t ask for help. If their husband happens to be the higher earner, that’s not an excuse not to pick up after yourself or literally do nothing around the house. My husband is retired and functionally a SAHH, but I still make sure my clothes are put away, that dirty dishes go in the dishwasher when I’m done, I help take care of the pup and just generally I can spot when my husband needs help an…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/20 02:46 PM
10

I think there is a difference between thin and very severely underweight. He admitted below that his wife suffers from anorexia, and has to starve herself to maintain his ideal. Additionally, he’s told her she was fat, disgusting and ugly while she was pregnant because she had to gain weight to carry their child. He’s feeding and encouraging her mental and physical illness. That’s much more extreme than a woman’s preference for tall men. While this is fake, because this poster is a troll, I don’…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/20 03:43 AM
9

I cheated on my wife when she was pregnant the first time and she deserved it. I did it on purpose and she ended up apologizing to me because she was ugly. She certainly isn’t mentally healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/20 10:28 PM
1

That makes a lot of sense!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/20 09:45 PM
2

Can you elaborate a little more on why you’re interested in women ~27+?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/20 09:38 PM
9

I mean if her post history is true, then this honestly wouldn’t surprise me. There are some doozies in there.
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/20 05:03 PM
58

Obviously you two are not compatible and you should move on. But tbh who’s more immature— the dude with a Naruto poster or the woman who slept with someone after four hours because he’s OK at Jeopardy, turned on classical music, and flashed a copy of War and Peace on their first date This x1,000,000 Don’t sleep with people on the first date!!!!!!!! One more time for the people on the back.
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/20 04:25 PM
14

He was right, wasn’t he? You did judge him. It sounds like he is mature (has his own place that he pays for, which likely means he has a job and education, has hobbies and is well spoken), but you’re going to toss him aside because he likes cartoons and doesn’t dress exclusively in Vineyard Vines and Brooks’ Brothers? People are complex. My husband has multiple degrees, is well traveled, has a closet full of designer suits, interested in current events and is extremely well read, has no debt (in…
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/20 04:23 PM
1

I am the her??
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 11:32 PM
1

I only get to s the d of this HVM because I approached him first 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 10:56 PM
1

Depends on the dad. My dad knows about our private marriage and was supportive because it wholly protects my inheritance and he is for small government.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 10:54 PM
1

I did a little experiment when I got home today. I was feeling a little frisky, so as soon as I got home and in door I knelt I front of my husband and placed him I’m my mouth and told him I wanted him. Worked like a charm and he loved it. I guess my husband low value to you, but thankfully you’re not his wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 10:32 PM
2

Looks like you have a different definition of “approach” than OP. So, the intent has to be just to chit chat. What if the intent changes during the conversation? If a woman develops and interest should she immediately end the conversation, run away and then just make eyes from across the room until the man initiates to make sure she isn’t a low inhibition, social defunct, masculine whore?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 09:21 PM
1

At least to me, being extroverted means they may be more inclined to strike up a conversation with someone. And, based on your experience women who are willing to strike up a conversation with men are more likely trash (low inhibition, socially defunct, masculine whores). So, wouldn’t it just be easier to screen out women who are extroverted?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 09:02 PM
1

Should men screen out and vet against extroverted women?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 08:57 PM
2

I would imagine you could enter into a private marriage in most Western countries. Basically, my husband and I wrote our own marriage contact instead of entering into one with the state. I had no problem with private marriage, and actually was the one to suggest it, but I think women would need to be educated on its benefits before widespread interest caught on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 08:26 PM
0

I think private marriage is a great way to ensure that your husband knows that he’s just not a paycheck to you. My husband will never have to wonder if I’m just with him for his money, because I have no right to it (and I have my own!).
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/20 07:54 PM
1

Based on your post history, it looks like you may work in cosmetology, so maybe this doesn’t apply to you. You will not be entitled to FMLA protections, because you will be with your employer for less than a year before giving birth. You work for less than 35 hours, so you don’t qualify for health care or any benefits. You’re planning to work for at most 9 months and then take at least another 6 off. Personally, I see very little advantage from a resume standpoint to re-entering the workforce no…
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/20 04:07 PM
2

Will you be taking any time off after baby #2 is born, or just enough time to heal? I’m child free, so I’m not going to pretend to have personal experience with this type of conversation, but I think that one ten month old baby vs. one ten month old baby and another on the way really changes the dynamic and discussion.
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/20 03:47 PM
5

Have you already told him you’re pregnant with your second child? Could that be what is causing the reservation?
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/20 03:27 PM
0

That’s really a bummer, because I know being able to step into that provider role when my family needed it the most was what made all the difference for my husband. There’s a huge need for low-skill and no-skill labor in my area. All of the stores in our area are hiring as they’ve pivoted to having in store shoppers, so customers don’t have to come in. Also, our governor has put in place special programs to help expedite the hiring of nurses aids and to help bring healthcare workers who have ste…
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/20 04:56 PM
1

When my husband really started to hate his job and it was impacting his quality of life at home, we sat down and had a wonderful conversation. I made sure he knew I loved him, and that I would still love him if he quit his job, even if he didn’t have something lined up. I made sure he knew I could pick up the slack in our budget and provide both of us with health insurance. I really reiterated that he was not simply a paycheck to me and that I just wanted him to be happy. He quit his job the nex…
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/20 02:02 PM
4

Personally, I don’t think you can even truly vet for cheating to decrease chances, but that’s just me. Everyone entering into a relationship should accept that they could be cheated on (emotionally, physically or financially).
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/20 08:51 PM
7

And my point is there’s no amount of vetting that will allow you to predict that.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/20 07:30 PM
9

Every person has the propensity to cheat. I grew up in a small town (medium sized based on regional standards though), and there were multiple instances of local pastors cheating on their spouse or breaking up marriages. It is not as simple as vetting well.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/20 06:26 PM
5

For some women that would be a nightmare. I don’t skip around in menswear (unless I’m wearing one of my husbands oversized tshirts as a sleep shirt, no panties of course), I don’t have any tattoos, I do curse but not excessively and never in public, I never discuss my sex life with anyone besides my husband, I could be described as witty but not arrogant or sarcastic, and I’m certainly no one of the boys. I only wear pants or shorts when I’m working out or on messy projects or if it’s incredibly…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/20 06:51 PM
2

We met in graduate school.
/r/RedPillWomen24/06/20 01:04 AM
6

Here is the list of expectations I had when I was looking for a husband: Must be male Must be my age or older, with a preference for men 5 years older Must not be showing signs of hair loss, with a preference for thick, light colored hair Must have received good dental and orthodontic care Must eat meat and animal products, and not be a picky eater Must be at least 6 inches taller than myself, so at at least 5’8 Must be interested in physical fitness, but not to the degree of being “ripped” or o…
/r/RedPillWomen23/06/20 03:26 PM
6

I certainly did (and still do) propose ideas for activities all the time. Just because I didn’t reach out first, and allowed him to fully control the pace of our relationship, doesn’t mean I didn’t always have a fun answer to “What would you like to do tomorrow?”. I would also propose ideas to hangout while we were in persons. Like “Hey, I can get us tickets to this play. Want to go?” or “Some of my friends are getting together at X, would you like to join me?”. The is just about texting, callin…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/20 03:27 PM
12

Any good man will lose interest in you if you don't give him that much respect. My personal experience is in stark contrast to this comment. I can count on one hand the number times I texted my husband first before we lived together, and even then it was usually just to confirm plans we already had made. I only remember one instance where I texted first because I hadn’t heard from him in several days. We got engaged in less than a year, so there was no issue with a loss of attraction. If men are…
/r/RedPillWomen22/06/20 03:15 PM
9

You’ve posted similar questions in different threads, probably because you don’t like the answers you’re getting. You’re forum shopping just hoping someone will tell you it’s clear loves and you’ve just been missing the signs. My advice to you is to end the relationship with him face to face and then move along. If he wanted to be with you and only you, he would have made that clear by now. Going forward, look for men who are your age or older and speak the same language you do. You’re 28 so tim…
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/20 07:42 PM
16

My husband brought of the monogamy talk on his own after 3 weeks. If this guy were serious, he would bring this up on his own and would not be pushing for sex before you had that conversation. He’s stringing you along. At your age, you’re better off moving on and finding someone who is actually dating for marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/20 03:29 PM
17

You’ve been dating for a year and his commitment to you hasn’t come up yet? If that’s the case, I don’t think there needs to be an exclusively conversation because it won’t mean any thing. He’s had a year to demonstrate to you via his actions that he’s committed and exclusive and clearly hasn’t done that.
/r/RedPillWomen19/06/20 02:07 PM
16

It looks like you’re ready to get married, because you’ve been together for three years and you feel like that’s a long time. Based on his actions, it appears your BF doesn’t agree. If you’re 22, then that means you started dating when you were both 18/19. Your BF is just now coming into his own and getting ready to see what life is like when he is self supporting. He likely does not feel ready to get married, which is very understandable. The fact that NO ONE around you is getting engaged and m…
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/20 12:07 PM
2

If the bride has a registry, I always stick to that out of respect for her choices. If not, then I give cash. If I go off registry, it’s because I’ve heard a specific comment from the couple that they wanted something but felt like it was too expensive to put on the registry. I never guess, unless it is a small add on gift (like a cute hand towel or something) in addition to a gift I know they wanted.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/20 04:01 PM
2

So, I may not be the best source of advice because my husband and I were very clear that we did not expect a single wedding related gift. In fact, we wanted people to save their money for themselves so badly that we had the “The best present is your presence” saying displayed very prominently on our wedding website. In summary, neither of us ever expect (or really even enjoy) to receive gifts for any occasion ever, so I may differ from your friend on that point. I’ve attended several bachelorett…
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/20 03:37 PM
0

I think it really just depends on who you were surrounded by growing up. Both my parents worked, and both had both feminine and masculine qualities. My mom worked in a traditionally masculine field (supply chain management) and was (she’s just starting to slow down as she approaches her 60s) a very active runner. She’s more a a pant suit than a skirt suit type of woman, but she is very particular about her appearance. She also was clean freak out of my parents. My dad also works in a traditional…
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/20 07:38 PM
5

That’s great that you and your SO are on the same page! I was younger when I met my husband (early 20s and he was late 20s), but I know of several women around my age (late 20s now) that have been engaged almost as long as my husband and I have been together. Engagement should be a very, very brief period before marriage. In the state I live in, you can get married in 1 day (you have to wait 3 if you don’t want to ask a judge to waive, but they pretty much always will) for $30. While this doesn’…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/20 06:45 PM
7

Sounds like your parents are red pilled, because there’s nothing natural about plastic surgery and fillers. Instead, I would ask them to pay for the counseling you need for your body dysmorphia.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/20 05:55 PM
18

I agree with a lot of what you said, because I took a lot of these steps in my own relationship (living together at 6 months and engaged in less than a year), but I do have one critique. If you move in together, make sure you are on the road to get engaged. When I moved in with my husband, I was very direct about my expectations. I explicitly stated that I expected to be engaged within one year or I would move out and live on my own again. I did not state that I would break up with him, but that…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/20 05:38 PM
3

I disagree with a lot of my points, which is the point. OP’s post is a lot of rambling non-sense that is overly influenced by her experiencing being abused by her mother. Clearly, she needs some help refining her points. If OP wants to see change in the world, then the first step is to be able to articulate the change she wants to see and why that change is necessary. OP’s life experiences are the polar opposite of mine, but yet here we are on the same forum. Why is that? That’s what I was tryin…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/20 02:25 AM
4

Even here you see people argue with you point by point as though it is necessary to defend the entire feminist platform. Ah, yes, I forgot that it impossible to challenge someone’s thinking and also agree with them. Silly me!
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/20 12:58 AM
4

You are the real MVP of this thread! Great comment!
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/20 07:48 PM
7

I’m not sure how a lack of feminism would have prevented you from being born to an abusive mother. If anything, feminism has allowed you to escape your family and make the choices necessary to get away from your mother. I’m not sure why you’re equating feminism with male vs. female strength. My job doesn’t require me to lift anything, is how much I can bench has no impact on my job performance. I have an advanced degree that required blind grading on all assignments and exams. Our school went to…
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/20 07:02 PM
9

Feminism has ruined the lives of: Men looking for a relationship Marriage was not a guarantee before 1960. Men were life long bachelors or were so undesirable that they were unable to find a wife. Fathers who get their kids taken from them As someone who has worked on family law cases, I do not see this happen to the extent that it’s talked about on Reddit. Even if a father is in prison, judges will order that their children be brought into the prison for visitation. I’ve seen mothers ordered to…
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/20 05:44 PM
2

I think this is going to vary from couple to couple, and you’ll have to figure out what you’re comfortable with. Before we were living together (which was all of 6 months haha) I never asked my husband before getting my hair done. Now, I usually show him pictures of what I’m thinking and get his feedback, but he never really cares what I do with my hair. He’s made it very clear to me that I should style my hair in a way that makes me happy, but I know not all men feel that way.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/20 08:01 PM
17

Honestly, I just googled “microbladed hairline” and didn’t see a single example that actually looked good. I looked into microblading, because it’s become popular in my area for eyebrows. I didn’t see a single provider where all of their clients looked good. I was very concerned about doing something that I couldn’t predict how good it would look, and there were no take backs once it was done. I’m very open about the fact that I use Botox, and one of the reasons I like it is that it wears off in…
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/20 05:01 PM
3

When my husband hated his job, I made sure he knew I’d support him (emotionally and financially) if he wanted to quit. Are you in a position to pick up the slack if your husband decides he wants to quit? If not, what steps can you take to ensure you’ll be okay if he decides he wants to quit?
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/20 03:55 PM
2

Let’s reverse this and apply it in a different context. Your premise essentially says this: you should have 100% autonomy over yourself and therefore, you should get to choose what you will and won't engage in as well as when you will and won't engage in it. The opposite is that you have zero autonomy over yourself and therefore, your spouse should get to choose what you will and won’t engage in as well as when you will and won’t engage in it. As an autonomous person, you have zero obligation to…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 10:47 PM
–

Balsamic Pot Roast Cesar Salad with Homemade Croutons Jalapeño Cheddar Bread Deviled Eggs Angel Food Cake I use my Grandma’s Angel Food Cake and Icing recipe, but the one above is very close.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 04:17 PM
4

Yep. I also went to before school care once I was in 1st grad (we did half day pre-k and kindergarten where I’m from). It was so much fun! I got to run around and play with my friends and breakfast was included. I also did after school care in 4th and 5th grade. It was my choice because I wanted more time with my friends a couple of days a week. Not everyone can afford a full time nanny, but that was my experience. Looking back at what my parents paid, it wasn’t that much more than the fee at a …
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 11:30 AM
7

If a mother is unwilling to take care of her kid because her career is so important to her, then she probably shouldn't have a kid. Goodness gracious. You realize that the ability to stay home has never been the reality for most mothers, correct? And, historically, even mothers who did not have to work inside or outside the home have used other people to care for an raise their children. Both of my parents worked and I had a full time nanny. It’s was wonderful! When my parents got home from work…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/20 08:56 AM
1

OP had commented in another thread that she has long hair, so it seems that she’d be looking for fullness and not length.
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/20 09:03 PM
5

For one, you can just grow out your actual hair Not everyone uses extension to lengthen their hair. Extensions are also great for adding volume and thickness. The lack of length or thickness may be natural. Some people have baby fine hair. Others may not be able to grow their hair to their desired length and have it still look healthy. While hair can be reflective of health, some times it just has a mind of its own. For other women, they may have a medical condition that impacts the health of th…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/20 07:56 PM
2

First, you need to remember that your SO is so accommodating because he understands what you’re going through. Dermatology is a very competitive speciality, and part of that is because it comes with a lot of flexibility. But, even though you’re not on the exact same path due to your different areas of practice he still understands what you’re going through. My husband and I met in law school, and one of my favorite things about him is that he gets me and and gets how stressful my job is. Persona…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/20 04:13 PM
2

I guess daily use isn’t an issue for me. Is drinking a class of wine with dinner each night alcoholic behavior? It really depends on if you can stop doing it each night without issue. I’m very skeptical about the lying piece. I have my suspicions that she’s put him in a position where he feels like he has to lie. I’d be interested to know if this whole situations started when he smoked with some buddies and didn’t ask her “permissions” first.
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 10:47 PM
3

Above your clarify that sharing your thoughts, feelings or complaints is “communicating” and emotional tamponing. I think how my husband and I define communication may be a little different from your definition, but I’m not sure. Is telling my husband that I’m very busy at work and may need some extra flexibility for the next couple of weeks communicating or “communicating?” What if I want to talk about rather or not we should redo our kitchen? Finally, is it communicating or “communicating” if …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/20 09:08 PM
2

So, just how much conversing can one do with their SO before it’s “communication”?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/20 07:46 PM
4

What’s the difference between communicating and “communicating”? I know my husband and he knows me, but he doesn’t know I have to unexpectedly work late unless I tell him. Isn’t that what communication is?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/20 07:19 PM
12

There are some principles of the legal profession that are universal, and recommending you take steps to document this incident are one of those. I have doubts that you’ve been honest with the solicitors you’ve met with. I also doubt that all four of them laughed you out of their office and told you there were no actions you could take to work towards a divorce. What I didn’t know was that there were only two doctors in all of England, your husband and his friend. I’m shocked that a country of t…
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 05:21 PM
17

I seriously doubt you were actually a solicitor. If you were, I feel bad for the clients who took your advice. Shame on you for not taking these steps because you don’t believe they are enough on their own. You start building your case now, even if it isn’t enough on its own. You file a police report because it gives you an opportunity to provide your statement on the same day the incident happened. The police can also interview your children. Children are very observant and honest when question…
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 04:49 PM
22

You should have filed a police report and immediately taken your children in for a medical evaluation. You should also enroll all your children who are old enough to communicate in therapy. You know all of this already, but you haven’t done it. Why is that?
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 04:36 PM
6

stoners are often not particularly motivated or conscientious Tell that to the entire tech industry . Nearly 50% of adults aged 26 and older have used marijuana in their lifetime, but we don’t have a 50% unemployment rate. I think it’s important for OP to know that there are very successful, very motivated individuals who use marijuana. Usage is more common that you think, and people you may not suspect are users. Don’t buy into the trope of the lazy couch potato. This trope is deeply rooted in …
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 12:13 PM
0

What has he lied about besides smoking marijuana? What steps have you taken that would encourage him to be honest with you?
/r/RedPillWomen21/05/20 12:04 PM
2

Thank you!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/20 10:06 PM
2

Ooo how do you do the trademark symbol? I tried to figure it out, but settled for quotes! Edit: I got so excited about the trademark I hit submit too soon. In college, I knew a lot of girls who dated trash guys because they felt that they themselves were trash. Many of them came from homes where they were probably told they were made to feel worthless by their parents, and that destroyed their self imagine. I went through something similar with the “relationship” I had before meeting my husband.…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/20 09:59 PM
1

The last paragraph is why she married him. He had just enough IDGAF to hook her. If he had fawned over her lovingly she would have run in disgust- but he had given up on women and it showed with every interaction. It created just enough of a challenge for her to imagine defeating him and that is what gave her (barely enough to get by but enough to get married) tingles for Mr. Nice guy. This is one of the comments from original thread. We cannot know what her relationship with her husband is like…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/20 09:58 PM
3

I get that the “he’s such a nice guy” plays into the whole “Nice Guys” and “No More Mr. Nice Guy” deal, but I would describe my husband as someone who is very nice and personable. My husband is extremely popular. Like I’ve never met someone who is so universally well liked. I imagine if you asked people who know him to describe him in three words that nice (or a synonym) would be one of them. I know there’s a difference between being a nice guy and being a “nice guy”, but not everyone knows abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/20 09:17 PM
7

Unfortunately, you’re only going to ever get one side of the story, which means you’ll never know the truth. My guess is, her idea to break up didn’t come out of thin air and may have been based on pressure applied by your brother. If that’s the case, it’s unfortunate he couldn’t give her the benefit of the doubt during a time when no one can afford to lose their job. I would encourage him to take time and work on himself and use this time to evaluate what he wants in a partner. Depending on wha…
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/20 04:53 PM
3

Did he initiate the breakup?
/r/RedPillWomen19/05/20 04:19 PM
3

I thought it was 50%. Something like 25% of intimate relationships had some violence and in half of those it was reciprocal. Is there a newer set of data I missed?
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/20 06:19 PM
1

First, it’s unclear from OPs post if they are currently engaging in hugging and cuddling. She says they meet up in her part of town or an outdoor spot like a park. Are they having intimate cuddles in public places? If so, why? Second, kissing is the extent of their physical intimacy. It sounds like all they’ve done at ~9 months is hold hand, cuddle, hug, and kiss. OP has no right to demand he kiss her, just like the BF has no right to demand OP have sex with him. If OP needs to make out with som…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/20 01:21 PM
4

Yes.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/20 03:33 AM
4

I know he's having a hard time too for the same reason, but every time I've asked him what he thinks, he's stated that he doesn't like having this boundary, but he hasn't changed his mind. I've never once nagged him or tried to manipulate him into changing his mind about this. Something doesn’t add up here.... You won’t die if you don’t get a kiss for another couple of months, but you’ll kill your relationship if you don’t drop this issue.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/20 03:27 AM
1

I guess my first question is why is this a concern anyways? My job doesn’t require a uniform per se, but when there isn’t a global pandemic going on the expectation is that I wear a suit every day. I switch it up between pantsuits, skirt suits and dress suits, but stick to neutral colors. I don’t dress overly feminine because it’s not my job to be feminine. In fact, my job requires to be in charge and aggressive sometimes. Personally I don’t think the work place is the place for this.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/20 12:52 AM
11

I've also read a ton of comments on Reddit (from men) who state the best way to initiate sex with a man is to be really direct. Like, grab his dick and say "let's bone." That sounds so masculine to me. Is this accurate? Or would acting feminine be more of a turn on? I mean, this is how I typically initiate and my husband is wild about me. Another good one is to just pull his pants down and place him in your mouth. But, you need to know your husband. My husband and I are very direct and to the po…
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/20 02:51 PM
23

You are 20 and your SO is 24, which means he was about 22 when you met and started dating. It is rare that men are dating for marriage at that age. It is unlikely that he is dating you with marriage in mind. I was a couple of years older than you when I met my husband, who was in his late 20s at the time. We were both dating for marriage and moved in together after only 6 months and were engaged in less than a year and married less than a year after that. Very, very little has changed from the t…
/r/RedPillWomen16/05/20 02:44 PM
2

But, flying across the room is physically possible. To fly can be defined as moving quickly, and certainly you can move quickly around the room. If you want to fly through the air, you can also do that by jumping or rigging a system to fly assisted. If Lady GaGa and jump from the top of the Dallas Cowboy’s Stadium surely we can get someone to fly around the room. Impossibility doesn’t just come down to being physically able to do something. Can I physically pack all of my possessions and move th…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/20 10:57 PM
3

First, it’s fiancée since she is a she. Second, being with a LVM for an extended period of time can absolutely happen to a HVW. I was in a situation similar to OP’s in my early 20’s. I absolutely hated my BF, and repeatedly broke up with him and tried to cut him out of my life. But, every time I would try to cut him out of my life he would threaten or attempt suicide. I was too young to realize that breaking up is one-sided and that his mental health was not my responsibility. It didn’t help tha…
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/20 07:59 PM
9

So it sounds like you aren’t in the US, so some of this might not be applicable. But, in the US there are 2+4 programs where you can get your BS and Pharm. D al in 6 years. If you’re not looking to be a practicing pharmacist, then you would go the masters/PhD route, but I would imagine you’re actually interested in a Pharm. D. If you did a 6 year program, you’d be 24 upon completion. There’s also a high likelihood that you’d meet someone in grad school (that’s how I met my husband) and get marri…
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/20 12:10 PM
12

You. Are. 15. Please, please talk to your parents and seek mental health services immediately.
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 11:22 PM
2

So, the reason I phrased my question this way is because if a woman stops her education at the HS level and doesn’t pursue a career, her partner will need to pick up that weight. Plus, if a man doesn’t want a woman to go to college and doesn’t want her to enter the workforce then he really needs to deliver to make that sacrifice worth it. In real life, I know very few couples where one person stays at home. In one case the husband is a doctor and makes obscene money in his early 30’s. His wife h…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 10:03 PM
1

I think this is an excellent point. In the US, you have to be with your employer for at least one year before you’re eligible for protected FMLA leave. At age 23, a college grad could be two years into her career and start trying to conceive. That’s enough time to have 3 kids before age 30 if you’re looking to have a large family.
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 09:54 PM
1

My husband loves loves loves being a SAHH.
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 09:26 PM
1

Can you elaborate or provide your personal experience as a woman navigating this decision?
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 08:16 PM
2

Does it have to be one or the other? Is there any reason a women can’t go to college, meet someone, and get married around the time she graduates? Is there a benefit to meeting men in college or grad school where there’s a highly concentrated pool of men who exhibit HV traits? So, I want to really hone in on your last place. Where specifically can 18 year old women who are not in the workforce meet men? And when I say high value, in this case I mean a man who can fully provide for a SAHW and the…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 08:12 PM
5

So, what age should women be looking to settle down? If it’s any time after 18, what should she do while she looks for a husband? Should she pursue education or a job of any kind? What if her parents can’t support her after high school and she needs to move out? How should women who don’t further their education or work meet HVM who can provide for them? Anecdotally, I was 21 when I graduated with my undergrad degrees and 24 when I completed grad school. When did 24 become too late to start a fa…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 07:05 PM
4

Looking back, would you change anything if you had the chance? How do you think your education make you a better mother? Do you ever feel like your education was a waste?
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 06:44 PM
7

How do women out of high school meet HVM who are able to fully provide for them and their families? Is a woman at a disadvantage if she enters the workforce for the first time in her 30s or 40s? How do these women ensure they can care for their family if her husband is unable to work due to job loss or disability? What about if he unexpectedly passes?
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 06:43 PM
9

First, I would recommend some therapy to work on your self image and that negativity loop your stuck in. I regards to working out, I don’t know where you live but all of the gyms are closed where I am. I think personal trainers are allowed to work with 1 client at a time on an appointment basis. So, this is the perfect time to either get a personal trainer who can help you design a workout plan or to start working out from home. If you’ve got your diet dialed in, then you can start with somethin…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/20 05:50 PM
35

I’ll take a different approach to this question and focus on a negative I identified in my husband before marriage, and talk about how it actually showed an important positive trait. My husband is a hot head and has a temper. That in and of itself was not a deal breaker to me, because I can also get a little spicy from time to time. But, one evening we were arguing and he got so angry he punched a hole in the wall. I remember the issue, but I don’t believe it’s relevant here. His house, his wall…
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/20 04:00 PM
4

This is just something that happens in NYC (and probably other large cities too). I’ve only visited a hand full of time and I’ve seen weird shit like this. I also know from friends that live there that a lot of people have a weird jacking off in public story. Unfortunately, some people are mentally ill and this is something they do. You can always report them or get off and switch cars or wait for the next train or bus.
/r/RedPillWomen11/05/20 03:07 PM
0

The fasting is what helps with sagging skin as you lose weight, and I just find fasting to be easier with combined with a keto or low carb diet. I would start with reading Dr. Jason Fung’s book The Obesity Code to learn more how fasting works, why it hasn’t been widely studied, and the benefits it can have.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 02:19 PM
2

Everyone needs to be able to be self supporting. Very few women are ready for marriage between the ages of 18-23, and that is the perfect time in your life to learn skills that can help you be self supporting. Whether it’s college, trade school or jumping straight into the work force it’s important to know you can support yourself and your family if the need arises.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 01:47 PM
4

It does not have to take 4 years to get to marriage if you are dating marriage minded men in their 30s. I understand this timeline is based on the findings of a PsyD, but from a practical standpoint not all successful couples follow this timeline so OP should not be discouraged.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 03:00 AM
9

This right here is a death sentence to your marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 02:35 AM
11

This will severely impact your relationship. These are not the types of things you can “take back” once you’ve given them. Additionally, you’re getting married, why do you care about what your father things so much? Your marriage will fail if you continue to put your father before your husband.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 01:25 AM
64

Ew. This would be a straight up deal breaker for me, and it sounds like it is for you too. If he does move away from home at your behest, you will always been seen as the enemy. You’ll be the one who took him away from mommy and daddy and there will be resentment all around.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/20 11:13 PM
8

Her BMI is at least 40, so OP needs to lose weight no matter what. I would strongly recommend intermittent fasting combined with keto, or at least low carb. This combination will help with skin elasticity as she loses weight. Under normal supply chain conditions, I do IF and low carb. Even though I try to stick to the lowest weight I can without being underweight I don’t have sunken in eyes and haven’t had issues with premature aging.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/20 09:30 PM
18

Some people have genetic dark circles. I look like a porcelain doll, except I have dark circles. Personally, I don’t find that they impact my looks, but I could do fillers or PRP injections if I wanted to. Instead, I just minimize their impact. I drink over a gallon of water a day, take collagen, eat a healthy diet, get plenty of sleep and moisturize. I also take allergy medication and Benadryl to help with the puffiness. I use SkinMedica Instant Bright in the morning and Belif Moisturizing Eye …
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/20 07:38 PM
1

I’m not sure, but I would find it unlikely. Both of my parents were (are) very dedicated to their careers.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 07:02 PM
2

I don’t think delivering unrequested, unexpected, unhealthy, fast food that has been touched and handled by numerous people is actually helping. Actually helping would be offering to have the meal of the families choice delivered at a time that is convenient for them.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 05:23 PM
2

You’ve asked your husband for more of his time, and he’s said no. If you continue to ask, no matter how you approach the conversation, you are nagging him. If you don’t want to submit to your husband’s decision, then there are plenty of other subs you can go to for advice. You’re correct that I don’t have children, but I do have some perspective that you don’t. I’ve been your child, and I am eternally grateful that my father worked so hard to provide me with the opportunities I’ve had in life. H…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 05:17 PM
4

Yikes! If you take this type of attitude with your husband I can see why he withdrawals into his work. If there’s anything that’s more pressure than being on the partner track at a law firm, it is owning your own firm. As someone who is working towards that goal with my own husband, I truly cannot imagine the pressure your husband is under the deliver for his clients. I don’t want to sound like I’m talking down to you, but there is a big difference between the pressure and responsibility felt by…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 04:24 PM
5

I’m very, very anti-Mama’s Boy and very pro leaving and cleaving. If you go to your mom for anything before you go to your wife, then there is a lack of leaving and cleaving. I think it’s important for men to have healthy relationships with their parents, but when you get married you vow to place the marital relationship over all others. For example, while we were planning our wedding my mother got a little testy with my husband when he didn’t feel like working on table assignments when she want…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 04:06 PM
0

Did you know his work habits when you got married? How about when you decided to get pregnant? Honestly, I really feel for your husband in this situation. Unless you’re also an attorney, you may not fully understand the pressure that your husband is under to create billable hours in order to stay on track for making partner. Your husband likely feels an increased pressure to provide now that you have a baby, you’re no longer working and you’ve made it clear you want a large family. He may feel l…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 03:31 PM
4

It’s clear from OPs post that there is a failure on her husband’s party to leave and cleave. Momma’s boys are disgusting and low quality, but it’s always obvious. My guess is OP assumed her husband would grow out of his momma’s boyness, but that just about never happens. Do. Not. Marry. A. Momma’s. Boy. Ever. Just don’t do it. We rarely eat out. I can’t make the perfect pizza in our home oven and I certainly don’t have the skills to make sushi, so we do eat out on occasion, but we haven’t gotten…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/20 03:13 PM
–

Yep! Thanks for the catch I fixed it in my OP
/r/RedPillWomen06/05/20 02:56 AM
1

So, in summary, we can’t really know the dynamic of relationships we aren’t party to. Additionally, we cannot truly know how our own husbands feel, because they may not be willing to share the truth with us.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 08:02 PM
4

Unfortunately, I think it’s hard to read and accept because it’s true even if we don’t see it. I know I don’t have enough of an inside looking into my friends’ relationships to know how they’d react in these situations. If you can say confidently that every single woman you know would STFU and give their husband space to look for a job, then I think you’re lying to yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 07:46 PM
12

Going back to my history, I have lied about guys that i slept with, saying usually, that i didn’t sleep with them. No. Your relationship is toast and cannot be salvaged.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 06:43 PM
11

I think some men expect their wives to handle their emotions and feelings the same way they would. I’ll use the issue of losing a job, because I know that can be particularly difficult for men. If a wife loses her job, and comes to her husband for support, he will hold her as she cries. He will also reassure her that he loves her and tell her that everything will be okay and that he won’t let anything bad happen. He’s her rock and her protector. He will shy away from conversations about finances…
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 06:08 PM
2

Financial Independence, Retire Early
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 05:12 PM
2

Thanks! I’m definitely not in with the popular crowd over at RPW, because I’m just a lowly “forever girlfriend,” but I sometimes question how you can be redpilled as a woman if you seek legal marriage. The laws surrounding marriage and divorce and the case law in that area aren’t going to change unless we seek change. Until such time where we have a system that truly treats both parties as equals under the law, I think the best thing we can do is opt out and create a new system of private, civil…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 03:51 PM
–

If you’re not already, go follow @gocleanco on Instagram. I started following them a couple of weeks ago and have already learned so many tips and tricks! Here’s my fave one so far: If you have a pan with set on food, cover it in really, really hot water with a dishwasher tab and let it sit over night. We have a grill basket we use to grill veggies and it was black all over from the grill and had a bunch of oil build up from the Olive Oil we use. I did two rounds of this trick and scrubbed with …
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 03:14 PM
2

How would you deal with splitting assets you’d both accrued during the relationship? So, we try not to split the cost of large purchases and instead alternate them. Cars are a non-issue because we both purchased our own cars. My husband owns our home, so he pays for all the upkeep and maintenance, and I pay the property taxes which are basically rent to the government (totally different rant there). I’m in the early stages of purchasing my own home, which would serve as our vacation home, so whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 02:39 PM
3

That is correct. The child custody and support process is the same for legally married and not legally married parents. I’m not sure why she’s insistent that I would need a marriage license to have a “legitimate family,” when a birth certificate establishes that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 11:23 AM
2

I’m not really sure what legal marriage would have to offer a child if we had one. The child would have two parents, one of which would stay home with them. They would have access to healthcare and resources from both parents. They would have their father’s last name and we would all live together as a family. If my husband and I were to break up, we’d go through the same exact process a married couple would go through regarding child custody, except (and this part is important) there would be a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 11:21 AM
1

My husband and I are both FIRE oriented and wanted to find a way to keep our assets separate. He was okay with the idea of legal marriage with a prenup, but I had concerns about their enforceability and brought up the idea of a private marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 03:03 AM
3

Yes. Personally, I think the child would be better off because they would not have to go through the uncertainty of a divorce. Instead, the 50/50 framework would already be in place and enforceable.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 01:43 AM
6

We are child free, but no one does sterilization on women in their 20s so there’s always a chance that could happen. First, I would require a paternity test at birth so he could know with certainly that the child was his. Then, he would sign the birth certificate and have all the same rights as a legally married father. Of course we’d seek the counsel of a family law attorney, but I would probably encourage an arrangement of 50/50 custody from the start to ensure that’s established and difficult…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 12:43 AM
20

So, no one has ever asked to see my marriage license. Where we got married, most people sign the marriage license between the ceremony and reception so no one ever sees, so there wasn’t even a question there. I went through the process of legally changing my name (you don’t need a marriage license to do that!), so we share a last name which probably helps. I’m the people in HR have figured it out, but I’m not really concerned. We have all the benefits of marriage, except for the tax “benefits” w…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/20 12:11 AM
13

Yep! My husband and I are in a private marriage and it’s been wonderful. 10/10 would recommend to anyone interested in putting in the work.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/20 11:54 PM
1

I’ll see if I can find a public link to the study, but the study I referenced was about men who signed birth certificates at the hospital, which includes married men. These paternity tests were done as a part of a study and not at the request of the father. The men participating thought they were the father. Additionally, studies regarding the family structure rarely inspect public records to ensure that participants are actually legally married. There was no risk in doing so, so my husband and …
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 07:10 PM
1

There really is no benefit left to marriage in the US. It’s great for lazy couples who don’t want to make other arrangements, but they just end up having to deal with everything on the backend when they get divorced.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 06:51 PM
1

That is correct. I know you’re in the UK, but in the US this mostly rings true in every state. There may be some slight differences from state to state, but the same common law principles apply.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 06:40 PM
1

While I would always recommend taking precautions on the front end, it isn’t entirely necessary. I think having children is a great example. You don’t need to be married to have children. In fact, unmarried fathers don’t have to deal with the issues around implied paternity. An unmarried father can have a paternity test done before he files for recognition of paternity and if it comes back negative (I’ve read some wild studies where it’s like 1/5 at hospitals), the he can walk away from mom and …
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 06:29 PM
2

Property rights go back thousands of years as well. Divorce law certainly doesn’t go back thousands of years, unless we count accounts of stoning people to death. You do not need to enter into a contract with the government to live life as a married couple. You can do all the same things a married couple does and have even better protection without the marriage contract, because the couple can actually negotiate what goes into the contract instead of having the government decide!
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 06:12 PM
3

There is a legal framework to divide assets and properties among non-married persons. There are wills, trusts, life estates and all sorts of creative ways to ensure your “stuff” goes to who you wish. People own prosperities with others they aren’t married to all the time. There are processes to deal with that as well. And, courts will still take child custody cases if the parents were never married. The courts aren’t just there for people who are married.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 05:18 PM
3

The biggest difference between dating and legal marriage for most couples is that you never really know if your spouse wants to be with you or if it’s just too much of a hassle to leave. When you’re dating, you’re lives are running on parallel tracks. They’re headed in the same direction, but they aren’t intertwined. While separating may be difficult emotionally, it can typically be done in a relatively quick manner. When you’re dating, your partner is putting in effort because they want to not …
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/20 02:40 PM
19

When he brings up a problem, I would simply listen to him vent. When there’s a break in the conversation, I would offer him a reassuring compliment (I find you incredibly sexy, in fact I’d love to rip your clothes off right now, but I didn’t want to interrupt you or I really respect and appreciate how hard you work for our family) and then ask “Is there anything I can do to help?” If he says no, then take him at his word and just allow him to vent to you. He has to know you’re a safe space to sh…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/20 11:31 PM
1

Depends on how you look at it. We’re both FIRE oriented, and he’s older than I am. He’s in his early 30s and has already retired early. He was able to retire earlier than expected because I can provide him with low cost, but very high quality health insurance. So, my income is more than triple his because he’s just taking a base level income. But, he owns the home we live in and has more assets. I’m in the early stages of looking to buy my own home, which will serve as our vacation home and a re…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/20 10:28 PM
2

I insisted on the private marriage in order to ensure full protection of his assets. A private marriage is the only way you can actually know that someone loves you and wants to be with you, because they don’t have anything to gain monetarily from the union.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/20 09:26 PM
3

I’m in a private marriage and it’s great! There are plenty of people in private marriages, who just don’t openly talk about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/20 07:15 PM
1

I think there’s a big difference between a when a relationship is first trying to get off the ground and an established relationship. I can count on one hand the number of times I texted my now husband first before we moved in together. I allowed him to set the tone and pace of our relationship. Typically, he’d reach out every day and we would talk, but if I didn’t hear from him I just assumed he was busy doing other things and would reach out when he was free. I was able to do this, because I h…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/20 05:53 PM
1

For couples who seek private marriage, there are all sorts of set ups that would allow one spouse to stay at home. My husband is retired and stays at home and it’s great! Because we have a private marriage, he was able to make that decision without me having to risk paying alimony in the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/20 05:42 PM
5

I think the members of this sub have told you the only way to solve these issues is to leave your bf and look for someone else. He is a textbook momma’s boy, and there is no cure for that disease. He is not ready to leave his mommy’s lap and be a husband. Nothing you can do will change that.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 03:00 PM
4

Does his mother not like it when he’s on the phone?
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/20 12:30 AM
8

First and foremost, having a disability (even a disability that requires you to apply for government assistance) does not automatically make you low value. But, in your SO’s case, he does not contribute to the household in any fashion, and instead spends all day indulging in hobbies. It also sounds like he’s a single father who doesn’t take an active role in parenting his daughter. These are low value traits. The main issue I see here, is that you have two different levels of cleanliness in your…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/20 06:14 PM
4

Can I ask why he doesn’t pay rent? Is it provided through a disability program or because you cover all of the rent?
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/20 05:42 PM
1

I think it’s different for each couple. My husband and I both follow the FIRE (financial independence, retire early) model, so we have completely separate finances. My husbands already retired, and wants to stay retired, so he is less of a risk taker. I want to reach financial independence in my early 30s, but I’m okay with working for myself for as long as I’m able, which means I’m more comfortable with risk. If we were a couple that had little to no assets, both had student loans, and we were …
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/20 05:36 PM
6

My husband also doesn’t work, but that’s because he’s retired and self supporting. Because he’s home all day, he manages the home and ensures it’s cleaned and organized. Does your SO’s disability make it physically impossible to do any chores? Does he not have use of his arms and/or legs? Do you own the home you live in, or is it rented? How do you split those costs?
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/20 05:31 PM
6

If he is giving you the option to separate finances, I would personally take it, but I’m in a vastly different position employment and finance wise than you are. Who makes sure the bills are paid in your marriage? I’m not taking about who earns what, I mean the actual administrative task of paying bills and budgeting.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 10:24 PM
-1

Well, that’s just extremely weird. I’ve got no other suggestions for you, except to just let it go. I think we’ve eaten maybe 2 meals on our fancy dining room table the entire time we’ve had it, so hopefully you don’t have a need to use yours often.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 10:13 PM
-1

Your feelings on the topic are very clear, and I take no issue with the fact that we disagree, but I wasn’t aware a YouTube channel was the price of admission for being able to ask questions and engage in discussion on the topic.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 09:59 PM
7

Could you sand down the table and paint it an entirely different color or use a different finish? He’s said you can’t buy a new table, he’s never said you can’t make the best of the one you already have.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 09:53 PM
-5

I would discourage you from rejecting the idea of a private marriage outright. It’s unlikely that the studies you intend to cite went the actual mile and verified if participants were in legal marriages. What’s more likely is that they answered the question “Are you married?” either yes or no. Many people I know who are in private marriages would answer that question “Yes.” Additionally, fundamentalist and orthodox communities often times discourage involving the government in marriage and belie…
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 07:48 PM
-6

Two quick questions: Will you be discussing the benefits of private marriage, and steps that can be taken to help protect the rights of the father from day 1 that aren’t available to father in legal marriages? Will you be discussing the importance of paternity testing, particularly for fathers who are in legal marriages? Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/20 06:35 PM
3

We have no reason to travel jointly to one of the 7 or 8 states that recognize common law marriage. Texas maybe, but their laws a little wonky. Additionally, we’ve taken additional protective measures to ensure that no one could construe our relationship to show a present intent to be married and recognized by the law. If our marriage were recognized by the government, my husband would have the same protect you discuss above. He could hit the “eject button” and receive the same benefits he does …
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/20 05:51 PM
3

My husband and I have a private marriage, so claims for support post-dissolution would need to be more creative than claims for alimony in a divorce proceeding. But, if we had a government recognized marriage, I would be the one paying alimony based on our state’s formula. Personally, I would not take issue with paying rehabilitative alimony. My husband retired and stepped away from full time work because we have shared life goals and plans. He’s made certain financial decisions (such as the car…
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/20 05:29 PM
15

I’d contact a family law attorney and explore an unjust enrichment claim. Success may be unlikely in your jurisdiction, but there have been successful claims. Your attorney may also know other avenues for recourse that have been successful in this area. Overall, I’d leave and continue my education. I’d look for schools that could offer you scholarships due to your extreme financial situation. Then, I’d take as many courses and possible and graduate as quickly as possible. Also, lol at making you…
/r/RedPillWives16/04/20 11:51 AM
6

Most guys in their early 20s want to spend time with their friends and do their own thing. That’s why they are rarely marriage material. He’s showing you his priorities by how he treats you when you’re not together. Please work on your trauma, but you’ve also got to realize you can’t change who he is and how he reacts to these types of situations.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/20 06:00 PM
4

Words mean nothing if your actions don’t back them up. Your post is supposed to be about showing your husband you love him, but you focus on verbal affirmations. How do you actually show your husband you love him? Keep in mind, that the question is really “How do you show your husband you respect and honor him?” The Married Red Pill has a weekly thread about owning your shit. Men who are truly high value own their shit without the expectation of praise or reward. While a thank you (preferably gi…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 02:41 PM
2

I disagree on the pain part. I can’t even tell when my injections are happening. I’m not a fan of needles (no tattoos and I can’t donate blood), but this was absolutely no issues for me. My doctor uses PRP (platelet rich plasma) injections in some patients to treat hollows under the eyes. My understanding in talking to her is that the area is numbed and while you can feel a weird sensation you should not feel much pain.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/20 12:28 AM
0

I think my husband just might own his shit more than others. He’s not waiting for a cookie and a good boy when he does something, he’s looking for the next project that he can tackle. He gets appreciation (both verbal and sexual/physical) multiple times every day, but if I threw a parade every time he did something around the house it would lose its meaning.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/20 12:08 AM
1

I keep his house and take care of his children and cook his meals, but he could have a housekeeper do that. He could have a house keeper do those things, but a housekeeper can’t keep our house, take care of ourchildren and cook our family’s meals. You aren’t doing those things just for your husband’s benefit, you are doing them to benefit your family because you’re all on the same team. Same goes for him picking up groceries or fixing the dishwasher. That helps the whole family, not just you. I’…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 08:47 PM
2

Looks like I should add “doesn’t like reality checks” to the list.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 01:11 PM
4

Based on your post history, you were physically, mentally and emotionally abused by your SAHM. You’ve been enrolled at 3 different college. The first you partied so hard you had a sub 1.0 GPA. I’ll honest, I didn’t even know people could do that poorly in college. Looks like you tried to get it together at a community college, but still couldn’t even pull off a 2.0, and are now at your 3rd college and still pulling a sub 2.0. Looks like you like that party life style!! You are not in a relations…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/20 12:54 PM
1

It’s been women we’ve seen out in public or on tv, so I don’t have pictures, but the fitness competitor I shared is a good example.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/20 01:20 PM
2

I’ve asked my husband for specifics on how he’d like me to look and I adjust my fitness routine accordingly. He’d never be down with a woman who looks so muscular and masculine, plus he prefers women with large, natural (or at least natural looking) breasts. I’ve seen him actively make fun on women who look like the lady I shared.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/20 12:45 PM
2

If I have to look like this to be attractive to men, then I’m 100% fine being single. I have no interest in having that physique. Thankfully, that’s not my husbands ideal, and honestly I don’t think that’s the ideal for many men.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/20 11:42 AM
2

My point was Jessica Alba is not sub 8% body fat. I don’t know what your point is.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/20 11:20 AM
6

Jessica Alba attractive =/= 8% or less body fat
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/20 12:52 AM
2

I mean traditionally children were seen and not heard, so wouldn’t it make sense that people are expecting that from their children as they try to adjust to being at home? Also, children were expected to work right along side their parents in tending the land and helping out with the household. Your “traditional” take in parenting and childhood is actually extremely modern and had only been around since about the 1960s when most families could afford appliances and other modern luxuries to cut d…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/20 03:50 PM
2

SAHPs aren’t the only way to raise successful children. I’ve never done a peer reviewed study on nannies, but my experience certainly isn’t unusual in my circle. My husband had several au pairs and a housekeeper in addition to a SAHM. I know his family is still in close contact with a couple of the au pairs, and they have come back to visit multiple times. They also remained close to their housekeeper until she passed away unexpectedly. I know several of his friends with similar experiences. Man…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/20 03:10 PM
5

Am I the only one who thinks it's sad that we pay other people to raise our children and think that's perfectly normal/acceptable? This is how wealthy people have always handled child rearing (though that haven’t always paid the people who raised their children). As someone who grew up having a nanny, I don’t think you should totally knock the practice unless you’ve experienced it. Thanks to my nanny, I know how to sew, cook, garden and make all sort of fun little crafts. I also spent a lot of t…
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/20 02:54 PM
6

I’ve never regretted by child free stance, but I most certainly don’t regret it right now!
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 09:58 PM
5

I wear makeup because I want too. Some days I don’t want to, so I don’t. That’s it. There’s really no additional reason.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 09:26 PM
3

Madonna’s had a lot more work done on her face than just Botox 🙄
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 08:46 PM
16

I wouldn’t recommended throwing away your marriage over Botox. It’s unfortunate that your husband has such a strong opinion on what you do to your body, but it is what it is. It looks like Botox isn’t an option for you if you want to maintain peace in your marriage. I will add, that I get Botox regularly as a preventative measure and there is no noticeable difference in my appearance. I started before I developed any fine lines or wrinkles and I’m very pleased with how it works as a preventative…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 08:25 PM
31

Our routine hasn’t changed very much, since I’m still going to work every day. Right before things started closing down, my husband had picked up some project work and was also going to work every day, but his project ended early due to the pandemic. So, he’s back to being home all day while I work. This isn’t a new pattern for us, because it’s how most of last year worked for us. When I woke up on Saturday morning and was poking around the house while hubby slept in, I noticed just how messy it…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 07:45 PM
18

I fail to see how any of these activities are limited to women who are not a part of the workforce? I am still reporting to work in a daily basis, yet I find time to meal plan and make creative meals. My house is clean and organized. I call my family and speak with them on a regular basis. I’ve been writing notes to be shared with health care facility residents, making masks in my free time and donating to my favorite charities a little extra. You can be a domestic goddess and still have a caree…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 07:34 PM
2

I fail to see how any of these activities are limited to women who are not a part of the workforce? I am still reporting to work in a daily basis, yet I find time to meal plan and make creative meals. My house is clean and organized. I call my family and speak with them on a regular basis. I’ve been writing notes to be shared with health care facility residents, making masks in my free time and donating to my favorite charities a little extra. You can be a domestic goddess and still have a caree…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 06:13 PM
2

I relied on data that was released by the CDC earlier this year.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/20 07:58 AM
92

Globally, about 40% of men smoke compared to 9% of women. Smoking leads to respiratory issues and pre-existing conditions that make individuals more susceptible to complications related to COVID-19. Men also tend to have higher rates of obesity, particularly in middle age. Obesity makes your more susceptible to COVID-19. Men also wash their hands at lower rates compared to women. Feminists aren’t forcing men to smoke, they aren’t forcing men to be obese, and they certainly aren’t forcing men to …
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/20 03:39 PM
1

It doesn’t really spoil anything as far as the story line goes, but sorry for spoiling that bit!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/20 07:56 PM
1

I’ve only seen the first three episodes. I think they talk about Doc Antle’s cult of women in the second one. I was just like “what?!?!” I cannot imagine moving to a big cat “sanctuary”, working for free, sleeping with Doc Antle and then changing my name to be one of his 15 wives or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/20 07:52 PM
4

I’m mostly just blown away by how the big cats are used as chick magnets. I personally have no interest in holding or petting a cub, but even if I did, there’s no way I’d sleep with (or join some weirdo cult!) any of the men on that show just to be able to interact with a cub for a couple of hours.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/20 07:39 PM
4

The only thing worse than your cooking is your writing.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/20 07:36 PM
5

I find if you stick to the outsides or the store and avoid conveniences foods there are lots of options. All of the produce is in stock, and I’ve been able to get what I need from the meat and cheese counters. Be flexible on meat. You can always buy whole chickens and break them down and if you have to buy higher fat ground beef you can drain it. Here are some recipes I’ve made the last two weeks: Brats and red cabbage Red Pepper Pasta Chicken Patty Parm Butter Chicken We bought 3 lbs (roughly $…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/20 01:01 AM
35

You need therapy, and you’ve probably needed therapy for over 2 decades. Get in therapy right now. You can even do tele-health. You have a lot of issues you need to work through before you even get to your issues with Alex. How unrealistic to try and start a relationship at 28 with if someone who lives in a different country, who doesn’t want to be with you, and who you haven’t talked to in 4 years.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/20 04:56 PM
48

At least in my marriage this is not an issue. My workplace has a dress code. Even though we are currently doing “Corona Casual” the typical expectation is that I wear a suit every day. Honestly, I don’t mind that type of dress code because it makes shopping and outfit planning incredibly easy. I’m not going to continue to wear a full suit at home while I make dinner and help with chores. I’m also not going to dress down as work because my “best me” is reserved for my husband. My husband is retir…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/20 11:35 AM
1

Here’s your context: I don’t want children. As a child, I never wanted to play with baby dolls. As a slightly older child and teen, I had no interest in holding or looking at babies when I’d get dragged baby showers and birthday parties. I never wanted to baby sit kids for some extra spending money. Heck, I didn’t really even enjoy having friends my own age until middle school. I’ve just never liked children. There’s nothing specific that happened to me. I wasn’t abused. My parents have a wonder…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/20 11:27 AM
1

I can’t help the fact that your message is “shitty.” What benefit to society would forcing to have someone who doesn’t want to be a mother to get pregnant, give birth and parent a child. I stand by my statement that I would rather take my own life then be forced to be a mother, which is why I’m married to someone who has also never wanted children. But, I suppose in your view it’s better to kill your self than not have a desire to reproduce and continue to live.
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/20 01:22 AM
1

If you believe that women should reproduce simply for the sake of creating more humans, and not because they have a desire to reproduce, then you’re correct we do not have any common ground between us. I had an absolutely idyllic childhood filed with traditional gender roles and I have never desired to be a mother. In fact, I would rather take my own life then be forced to get pregnant, carry a child and be a mother simply to add to the world’s population.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/20 03:19 PM
4

Why does OP need to change?
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/20 02:06 PM
4

You just have to be confident about your decision. I’m at the age where people are asking about kids (married and mid/late twenties), and I just tell them we’re childfree. Rarely does anyone ask why, but if they do I just tell them I don’t feel called to be a mother. No one has ever tried argue that point with me. I know if I had a kid I would be profoundly unhappy, so why would I allow anyone to convince me otherwise or tell me I’m less than for being happy.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/20 12:55 AM
13

Some women don’t feel compelled to have kids. I’ve never had baby fever or felt the desire to be a mother. I have no interest in being a mother, including an adoptive mother. I just don’t like kids.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/20 12:43 AM
4

I personally don’t find that division of labor equitable, but if it works for you and doesn’t breed resentment within your marriage then that’s what matters.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/20 12:16 AM
20

again, rather than working and “just getting through” our focus can come back to an attitude of excellence and have the home be our main project. First, if your husband has decided that what is best for your family is having you the work force full time, then that decision means that he has decided work is the priority over the home, and that chores should shared or a cleaning service should be hired. A captain worth following would not dictate that his wife work full time and take care of all t…
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/20 05:23 PM
3

Not everyone who goes to college leaves with debt.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/20 11:28 AM
0

But, he could be stocking shelves at Target, that’s the point. And, in fact, my husband is currently strongly considering applying to work at our local grocery store to help out during the pandemic, because he’s young, fit and healthy (and a little tired of staying home all day as I got out and work 12 hour days).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/20 10:10 PM
1

Of course stuff like this happens in real life. My husband is a SAHH now, but we met in grad school and have the same, lifestyle, experience, education and values. We both worked in the same profession, but he stepped away and started to stay home after a couple of years. He takes up the occasional project, but for the most part doesn’t work, so I guess objectively he’s less than a Target employee. This works great for us though. I get to go to a job I love every day and he runs a tight ship at …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/20 10:03 PM
1

Let’s not pretend there wasn’t a single healthy woman on this plant who didn’t desire to have children before 1960.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/20 09:48 PM
3

Seduce my husband Workout Play with my pup Play games with my husband FaceTime friends and family Discuss an interesting article I just read with my husband Check-in with people from work to see how they’re doing and if there’s anything I can buy or do for them Write letters and draw goofy pictures to send to friends and family Check-in on my friends who are small business owners to see how I can support them during this rough patch Donate blood
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/20 09:45 PM
2

Not 👏🏻 desiring 👏🏻 children 👏🏻 doesn’t 👏🏻 make 👏🏻 you 👏🏻 unhealthy. Again, so maybe you get it this time, there is nothing wrong with women who have no desire to be mothers.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/20 09:38 PM
6

And, some women never experience baby fever and have no desire to be a mother. Being child free does not make you “sick”.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/20 05:21 PM
5

I didn’t laugh, I cringed.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/20 05:18 PM
2

I would highly recommend trying out intermittent fasting. Start with 16:8 (fast 16, eat 8) and slowly work towards OMAD (one meal a day). I’m currently doing a combo of OMAD and 5:2. 5:2 means that two days each week (T and Th for me) I eat no more than 500 calories. I’ve tried doing a full fast those days, but my daily medicine and supplements agree with me better if I have them with some food. You could look at getting a waist trainer and wearing it when you work out. You could also try dermar…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/20 07:17 PM
-1

In short, I wholly disagree with OP. Having hobbies (I guess unless you consider proper nutrition and exercising hobbies and not just essential to life) does not make you more physically attractive or sexy. I also don’t agree with the assertion that men generally require women who have super duper unique hobbies in order to consider them for LTRs and marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 06:40 PM
-5

I could’ve universalized the maxim using a slew of thought up examples, but Kant’s thought experiment always starts off with an individualized example (example: I’m hungry and I have no food, so I should steal to survive), so it seems best to start with examples from my own life. Also, for the record, I’m not pretending to have deeper philosophical insight. One of my several undergraduate degrees is in philosophy, but as with anything in philosophy that may or may not mean anything ;)
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 04:12 PM
-2

Please see my comment above.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 03:44 PM
-5

I’m not taking it personally. I am using a philosophical technique based Kant’s thought experiment of universalizing a maxim. I’m pushing OPs assertion to the limit to test it’s general applicability to the RPW community. First, OP states that everyone needs a hobby, but she doesn’t provide a definition of hobby or examples of what she believes men view as “sexy” hobbies. Second, she states that these hobbies need to be “unique” and should help you “stand out.” Here again, she doesn’t provide an…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 03:14 PM
2

But, unless you juggle and make ballon animals regularly in your free time for pleasure, then they are not hobbies. They’re fun skills to have, but they aren’t hobbies. I play multiple instruments, but we don’t have a community band in our area, so I don’t practice regularly. Therefore, it’s just a fun skill I have, but not a hobby.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 02:11 PM
0

OP’s argument is based on women needing independent, unique hobbies in order to be appealing to their SO’s. So, the fact that I don’t have a “life” or hobbies separate from my husband would make me “dull, repetitive and boring” in OP’s eyes.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 01:57 PM
1

At least in my case, I love my job. Like really, really love it. I’m extremely passionate about the area I work in. I’m one of the few people I know who wakes up every day excited to go to work. Honestly, I would do my job for free, because it brings me so much joy. So, it’s not that I lack the mental energy to have hobbies, but I don’t know what hobbies I would have that are completely separate from my husband (because, remember shared hobbies are dull). I read and write all day at work, and I’…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 01:47 PM
6

I don’t understand everyone’s obsession with hobbies, and this requirement that you have to have unique, and varied hobbies to be a well rounded person. A hobby is defined as, “an activity done regularly in one's leisure time for pleasure.” How much leisure time does everyone have that their able to have multiple, unique hobbies that their SO has no interest in (because you’re dull if you have shared hobbies?)? I work out regularly, but I don’t enjoy it, so that’s not a hobby. I view working out…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/20 11:15 AM
5

Girl, you need therapy. There are plenty of therapists who telehealth, and there has never been a better time to sign up. Do some research and find a practitioner your insurance covers. My guess is they are still taking new patients, but your sessions will be done via phone or video chat for you.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/20 04:27 PM
6

r/cringe
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/20 07:32 PM
1

Taking that chance is worth it for some people. Personally, I’m not bothered by the prospect of arranging and paying for my end of life care and being alone in the end.
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/20 02:22 PM
1

My grandparents had five children, 4 boys and 1 girl. When my grandmother was in hospice care at the end of her life, we were the only family that had people there with her around the clock. The other people in the facility were all 70+ and from the generation where everyone had children. The staff was shocked how supportive our family was, pointing out that many of their patients either had no visitors and were alone at the end, or they’d have the occasional visitor who offered no care. I know …
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/20 01:58 PM
2

as does aging alone with no one to take care of you, but for the record that doesn't end after 9 months Well, for the record having children doesn’t guarantee they’ll be there to take care of you when you’re older.
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/20 01:32 PM
5

For when she inevitably deletes her OP: Hi all, I hope you're doing great and having nice weekends! I posted a couple of times earlier this month (about three weeks ago) concerning my boyfriend. We had a horrible fight and it ended in him telling me to pack up my bags and go. The next morning, instead of making up as usual - he was still fuming and I decided (after talking to a friend) to actually pack up my stuff and go. The last few weeks have been so confusing and difficult. A relative was ho…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/20 08:19 PM
1

We met in graduate school. My husband is very type A, and I believe he would excel in whatever he chose to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 12:05 PM
2

SAHHs aren’t uncommon where we live, and at least outwardly my husband isn’t the only one who approaches his role this way. He plays in a couple of local sports leagues and has made friends with several other guys who stay at home. These men volunteer, take care of their kids (one dad homeschools his kids), handle the home front and still find time to play sports and stay healthy. Some women just vet better than others.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 07:19 AM
2

I don’t think the is universal. My husband stays home while I work, and it’s incredible. He takes of absolutely everything, including himself. Our home (which is rather large) is immaculate, he runs all our errands, and he takes care of our pup during the days which is so much better than crating or daycare. He’s so efficient he still has time for the gym and his over hobbies. All I do is cook every night, which is great because it helps we unwind for work. I hate doing chores, and would much ra…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/20 06:59 AM
45

Haha, yes! One of my husband’s friends does this. He has so many different plates that he can’t remember their names, so he calls them all by pet names. The girls are all so dumb and think it’s cute and sweet.
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/20 05:46 PM
5

A sheitel is a wig worn by Orthodox women as a part of their faith. Your comment is ignorant and discriminatory.
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/20 11:48 PM
2

That’s great! I’m glad you enjoyed your gift. Even though I didn’t expect anything, my husband went all out and totally surprised me. He’s just learning to cook, but made a heart shaped pizza and had bought my favorite candy for us to share for dessert. We follow a pretty strict low carb/paleo diet, so this was an extra special treat for both of us. He also bought me a necklace (similar, but not exactly the same), which really blew me away! I’d left my wedding ring and earrings at home, because …
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/20 07:18 PM
3

What did your husband get you for Valentine’s Day? Did it meet your really high standards?
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/20 11:39 AM
16

My husband and I are child free. We know it’s not for everyone, but we enjoy it our life together!
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/20 02:27 AM
8

It sounds like he would have still put out the fire (or potential fire, whatever that is?). The fire can still be put out if the child and pets can’t be wrangled. By the time I was mobile, I know I would have responded to and obeyed a command from my parents to stay out of a room that was dangerous, and my dog is trained to go into their kennel when commanded. With all the pets I’ve had, I feel confident that their instincts would have kicked in and they would stay out of the room with fire (or …
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/20 03:22 PM
31

Had I been trying to sort the potential fire out, I’d have been a total mess. I’m not good in that kind of stress. What would you have done if your husband wasn’t home?
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/20 01:45 PM
3

Shortly before my husband retired, it was clear he was getting burnout out. He was solely responsible for a volume of work that should have been spread across three people. No matter how efficiently or hard he worked, he was never able to gain control of his work load. But, he kept going to work every day and killing himself because he felt a responsibility keep working towards his FIRE date and our joint financial goals. I had a really fantastic conversation with him where I emphasized that we …
/r/RedPillWomen12/02/20 02:36 PM
-12

LDRs are not relationships by TRP standards.
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/20 12:40 AM
6

New relationships shouldn’t be long distance.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/20 09:56 PM
4

If you actually a HVM, you wouldn’t have to be in a long distance whatever you’re doing.
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/20 03:41 PM
10

Do you think some of your concern about what others will think stems from your husband’s past? While it sounds like he’s taken time to work on himself, being a drug addict, diagnosed as bipolar II, having fibromyalgia, and having chronically low testosterone are all life long conditions. Are you concerned that people will judge you because not because you’re becoming a SAHW, but because of who you’re becoming a SAHW to?
/r/RedPillWives09/02/20 05:32 PM
1

Seeing a man cry isn't sexy but that doesn't mean we don't love him still and deeply. Maybe I’m a total odd (wo)man out here, but I find it incredibly sexy when my husband is vulnerable. Seeing him that way makes me want to be extremely close and intimate with him. When he is open and vulnerable, I feel incredibly loved and cherished because I know that he must respect and trust me an incredible amount to feel comfortable sharing his feelings with me. I think this is the joy of private marriage.…
/r/RedPillWomen07/02/20 09:06 PM
2

Orthodox Red Pill teaches that men love women, women love children, and children love puppies. I’ve always wondered how this model adapts to fit different family setups. In my case, we are childfree and FIRE focused. Therefore, I don’t depend on my husband for anything. I find this incredibly freeing, because I know that I truly love him and he truly loves me. I see this as one of the greatest benefits of private marriage. If we were in a legal marriage, I would always have to wonder if he was w…
/r/RedPillWomen07/02/20 06:30 PM
4

I don’t think it matters that the trust was unearned. If you give women two options (1) a man with a 7 figure trust and (2) a man with 6 figure student debt who makes $47,000 a year but has the potential to increase that, I think most women would go for the instant gratification of the trust fund guy. Now, very few women have access to men with 7 figure trusts, so I wouldn’t recommend holding out for one. But, most women are just looking for resources and they don’t care how they were obtained.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/20 07:12 PM
2

Can you explain further? How does a trust fund prevent someone from procuring resources?
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/20 06:17 PM
2

Meh. I think it depends on the woman and what her goals are. My husband is in his early 30s and already retired. He’s very passionate about his hobbies, but was never super interested in pursuing a career long term and viewed his job as a way reach retirement sooner and to provide benefits like health insurance. But, if you’re not from that world, I can see why you’d hold this opinion.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/20 04:35 PM
2

Meet with an attorney and have them walk you through options. It’s possible you could still be a SAHM, but you would need to enter into a contract where he employs you to care for his children and he pays you a wage, provides benefits such a retirement and health coverage, housing and transportation. Additionally, if you have children you will need to immediately go to court and have a custody agreement entered, including the provision of child support. There are option out there, they just aren…
/r/RedPillWomen02/02/20 03:19 PM
1

True. Colors. Shown.
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/20 09:44 PM
0

You posted looking for solutions, which aren’t all going to be sunshine and rainbows. If you know you need an escape, then don’t keep alcohol at your house and don’t allow it there. Sounds like you’re trying to get sober and your depression medication is contradicted anyway. He may think it’s hypocritical than he can’t drink, but you can smoke weed, so you might want to ditch that too if you’re serious. If there’s going to be drinking, then don’t go. If he gets drunk at a hotel when you’re with …
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/20 09:38 PM
0

[H]e does annoy me when he’s drunk and has on a few occasions gotten annoyed w me when I did nothing wrong. I understand that you have triggers around drinking, but you kinda sound like a wet blanket. Handling your triggers is your responsibility. If you can’t be around drunk people without getting annoyed, then you need to remove yourself when people start approaching that point. While you say that you’ve done nothing to deserve his annoyance, it seems to me like you probably nag and whine when…
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/20 09:22 PM
25

Start building your own life. Spend 3-4 nights a week away from home. Volunteer at church, or the local library or with Big Brother/Big Sisters. Join a book club that meets weekly, take a workout class at the Y each night, or learn to quilt and go to workshops with other women. Heck, run for city council or school board. The possibilities are endless. Go on a vacation for 7-10 days without him. Go with your mom or other married women. Ideally, go on a cruise or somewhere with limited cell servic…
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/20 06:53 PM
2

Honestly, I would recommend staying single and really focusing on becoming a fully independent adult. While it was physical attraction that causes the initial spark between my husband and myself (we met for the first time in person), it was other lifestyle qualities that showed him I was also marriage material. Things like being in grad school, being debt free, having a large savings, driving a nice car and having a nice home all stood out to him. He’s told me multiple times the relief he felt w…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/20 07:12 PM
0

Wrong. Yell: to utter a loud cry, scream, or shout Scream: to voice a sudden sharp loud cry Yelling and screaming are not universally understood to be “in anger.” If they were, they would be defined as such.
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/20 07:07 PM
1

It’s unfortunate that you’re so hung up on my one illustrative example, and unable to to see how it’s applicable to other situations. Not wholly unsurprising given your other comments though. Maybe this is an example you’ll understand: When you touch my head while I am going down on you or restrict my movement during sex, I feel scared, trapped and like you are forcing me to engage in that activity because I was raped in college, and my rapist forced me to perform oral sex and help me down while…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/20 07:04 PM
1

First, I should clarify that the illustrative example has nothing to do with me personally. I had an idyllic childhood and was never abused in any way. Second, hitting a spouse is illegal in most cases. Yelling at your spouse is not illegal. That’s nice that you don’t think that anyone should ever yell or scream in any situation ever (I personally think this is an extremely weird stance. For example, you can’t yell as someone if they’re about to be hit by a car and you can’t scream if you fall a…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/20 05:54 PM
15

I would start over and not reach out to either of them. Very, very few men are going to feel prepared to discuss and enter into marriage at age 21. I met my husband in my early 20s. He was in his late 20s. We were engaged within a year of meeting. You still have time to fully vet someone before dating towards marriage. I didn’t start dating seriously until I was ~22 and was able to adhere to your ideal timeline (I’m child free, so no kids, but we could have had them before 25 if we were interest…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/20 03:44 PM
6

I disagree with your take that the format the therapist suggested is always the wrong format. Let me use an illustrative example to explain: When you yell and scream, I get scared and shutdown by withdrawing into myself. I react like this because my father was physically abusive and would yell and scream at me why he was beating me. Therefore, I associate yelling and screaming with my memories of being abused. What would help is if you would try to avoid yelling and screaming, or at least unders…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 10:16 PM
1

It’s been the kiss of death for every women I know. My mom was in a very competitive MBA program while she was pregnant with me and I know she heavily regretted it. If you’re on bed rest during your final semester or leading up to the bar, there are no accommodations available you just have to let your grades tank or miss your test date. DH and I are both child free, so this was never a consideration for us, so I only have other people’s anecdotes to add. It also sounds like I was much younger t…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 05:28 PM
2

Whatever you do, DO NOT TRY TO GET PREGNANT UNTIL YOU HAVE PASSED THE BAR AND BEEN SWORN IN. Seriously, I do not know a single woman who had a child while in law school or sat for the Bar while pregnant who passed. Not a single one. A couple never took the Bar again. The few who did failed the second time. I think I know one person who passed on their third attempt and they had very lack luster options for jobs. If you want to be a licensed, practicing attorney (maybe that’s not your goal, which…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 04:07 PM
10

Does your LDR have a concrete end date? Also, just to clarify were all of these conversations held via text and phone call?
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/20 04:02 PM
1

Financial Independence, Retire Early It may be possible, but we didn’t discuss the details since it wasn’t relevant to us. My thought is, if you’re in a private marriage you may need to set up a custody agreement to ensure the father has primary custody of the child. There would also need to be separate accounts and a trust for the child, and it would really be a production if one parent wanted to stay home.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/20 03:18 AM
1

My husband and I are both into FIRE. He’s in his early 30s and already retired. He took some time off when he first his his FIRE date, but has since decided to take on projects very selectively so he does still bring in some income. I’m in my mid-20s and probably about 10 years from retirement. I don’t think I’ll really want to stop working, but my long term goal is to be self employed. I could hit my FIRE date earlier, but I’m really not in a huge rush because I love my current job. So, going i…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/20 01:06 AM
1

Yes, but we were able to structure things exactly how we want them and not leave that up to a judicial system that is inherently biased against men. If our relationship ever ends, it will be on our terms, not on the terms of the government who would be hell bent to strip my husband of his assets.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/20 04:24 PM
0

Yes. My husband and I have a private marriage. We had a ceremony, publicly declared our commitment for each other, I legally changed my name and we have made a series of other legal commitments (wills, directives, POA) to each other. There’s no need to involve the government to prove you’re committed to each other. We are child free, so I won’t weigh in here. I would say maybe 1/3. I just see fewer people coupling up generally. Additionally, I know some people who are 10+ years older that eventu…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/20 12:40 PM
-4

I don’t want to be the bitter old woman. Too. Late.
/r/RedPillWomen09/01/20 02:00 AM
12

You’ve been dating for 3 years and are both in your late 20s. Why aren’t you married, or at least engaged? Why are you still living an hour apart, and functionally in a LDR?
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/20 10:07 PM
1

People can take care of their outward appearance and not be attention whores seeking validation from others. So, I think that’s great that you recognize people can have different values than you, and that does not make them lesser.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/20 05:12 PM
1

Have you considered that women can invest in their personal upkeep for themselves?
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/20 03:51 PM
5

Your sister got bad Botox. She either went to an unskilled provider, received watered down Botox, only had units placed in her forehead and not her 11’s, or didn’t go to her follow-up appointment. If you receive unadulterated Botox from a skilled provider and go to your 2 week follow up appointment you won’t have that look. Please don’t base your opinion on Botox on one person’s bad experience.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/20 03:49 PM
14

This is unhealthy and dysfunctional. 0/10 can not recommend.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/20 02:35 AM
6

Do you have a financial advisor? If not, get one ASAP. My husband bought our home in cash, but because we follow a FIRE lifestyle, not because we don’t believe in interest rates. Buying our primary residence outright was in line with our financial goals, not something we did to avoid a mortgage. I’m hoping 2020 will be the year I purchase our second home, a vacation property. We will be taking out a mortgage, because that’s what our FIRE-friendly advisor recommended. We’re able to get a much hig…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/20 11:37 PM
1

Are you on a FIRE plan? Is that why he is set on purchasing a house out right?
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/20 10:33 PM
2

Wrong. This is not automatically the case. Very few states recognize common law marriages (and you haven’t even properly explained the elements).
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/20 03:44 AM
6

She asked for advice on how to change her mentality, so I gave her mine. That’s cool that your husband gives out different advice, it doesn’t mean that my routine doesn’t work for me or that it wouldn’t work to OP. Nothing works do everyone. None of it is better or worse. Then why leave the comment? You’re right that fasting does not equate weight loss, but for many it’s an easy way to control CICO.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/20 11:59 PM
17

Try intermittent fasting. Start with 16:8 and work your way up to OMAD. That way you can have whatever you want as long as you eat it in one sitting and it’s within your macros. I do a 16:8 and 5:2 combo. I have an 8 hour eating window (12-8 pm) each day. 2 days a week I only eat ~500 calories (T and Th) and the other 5 days I stick to my normal macros. My general diet is low carb, paleo. On my low calorie days I eat keto, but the other 5 days I will sometimes go over 20 carbs, so I’m not strict…
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/20 11:30 PM
22

Have you ever considered that your BF is lying about how wealthy he is?
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/20 07:58 PM
2

My husband is retired so he’s always at home when I get home from work, but on the rare chance he is out that’s definitely a great time. I usually go up for a bed a little earlier than he does, because I like to get a jump start on my skin care routine. And, I also change right when I get home from work and then would be a good time too.
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 12:38 AM
2

Liberator Kama Sutra Sex Chair Sensual Chaise - Merlot Micro-Velvet https://www.amazon.com/dp/B077JDGPPM/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_h8tcEbXDDMQ9B Step 1: Buy a sex chair for your bedroom (honestly wouldn’t have guessed that’s what it was designed for if I didn’t run across a video on YouTube. Step 2: Get a Brazilian wax and some crotchless lingerie Step 3: Put on said lingerie, lay on chair and ask your husband if he’d like to lick you. Disclaimer: We do not have a sex chair, so I just pull this move …
/r/RedPillWomen30/12/19 12:07 AM
6

Girl, you need to move out on your own ASAP. The year I spent living alone did so much for me. I was incredibly busy with grad school, so I didn’t date during that year, but I did learn a lot about myself. I lived with friends the next year and with DH after that, and don’t miss living alone, but I am so thankful for the experience.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 11:00 PM
5

That helps put your advice into perspective.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 10:51 PM
2

Did all of these things with my husband. Different strokes for different folks. Did you abstain for all of these while dating your husband? What time period did you begin dating him?
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 10:30 PM
2

I decided to wait for now! After looking at containers and organizers, I decided I should allocate my money there and actually get everything organized before rewarding myself with a Cricut. But, I’ll definitely be on the lookout for another deal on the Maker.
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 06:25 PM
9

I'm younger/less experienced than you, but I've had success with: I'm also younger than OP, but have been very successful in a high stress, faced paced, male dominated field. being honest and vulnerable when I feel overwhelmed Save this s*** for your mom or your friends. A better suggestion would be to place an importance on work/life balance, set boundaries to maintain that balance, and enforce those boundaries. Example: No, I can't stay late at the office tonight because I have a personal even…
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/19 04:44 PM
3

Thanks for the input. I just don’t know if I’ll get crafty enough for the extra $150 for the Maker to be money well spent.
/r/RedPillWomen28/12/19 06:33 PM
2

My husband is in his early 30s and retired, so he’s stays at home and manages the household, and we both love the arrangement! We’re child free, so there’s no children to take care of, but he does 98% of the work around the household. No issues with attraction. In fact, I find him more attractive then when he worked because he has time to be a dedicated gym rat.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/19 12:26 AM
0

Personally, that isn’t a concern. For my husband’s protection, we have a private marriage. The lack of government involvement is really freeing. Child free couples are perfect candidates for private marriage, and hopefully as it becomes more normalized more couples will leave the government out of their marriages.
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/19 09:07 PM
2

A woman’s lack of desire or inability to reproduce does not impact her ability to be in a RPW style relationship. Just like any belief or physical trait, it may prevent certain men from being interested in an LTR with her, but it does not wholly limit her from competing in the SMP. Not all child-free women spend their 20s and 30s riding the CC. Some, like myself, settle down in their early 20s with men who are also child free. And, for what it is worth, from my experience there is not a shortage…
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/19 08:36 PM
2

Not having children because of that small chance of a disability is stupid. That’s just your opinion. There are some couples that would not want to risk passing along certain genes. Additionally, mental health issues can cause someone to require long term care and are less predictable than physical disabilities. And If you against the odds have a Child with severe disability and you feel like it's a burden you can give him away or send him to one of those institutions. Wow. Just wow. This is so …
/r/RedPillWomen26/12/19 10:31 PM
8

What if that’s not how things play out? What if OP has a child with severe disabilities. What if she had to give up her dreams of working, volunteering, traveling and early retirement to care for her child 24/7/365? What if her child never became independent? What if she had to care for the child until she could no longer care for herself? Just because things worked out for your family, doesn’t mean the experience would be exactly the same for OP.
/r/RedPillWomen26/12/19 08:49 PM
21

When people ask DH and I when we plan to have kids, we just say “We’re child free, so that’s not part of our life plan.” Going forward, I would recommend just saying “I’m focused on other areas of my life right now” when asked about having children. It sounds like you’re not fully committed to the child free lifestyle, so I’d leave the door open a little to deprive people of the “I told you so” moment if you do change your mind. Stop justifying your decision like you do on this post. Some couple…
/r/RedPillWomen26/12/19 02:55 PM
2

Awe, thanks! Bless your little heart
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 10:18 PM
2

Yes, incredibly. Thank you for asking!
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 10:16 PM
2

I feel like what he’s done this week is extraordinary! Without him I never would have been able to meet all my deadlines at work and host Christmas for the first time ever. It’s because of what he does at home that I can really lean into my career and live my dreams.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 09:24 PM
2

Would it surprise you if I told you that my partner was a SAHS, and was the one that did all of the cleaning in preparation to host? Would it surprise you if I told you he’d gone out to the store 5 different times over the last week to get ingredients for Christmas dinner? Would it surprise you if I told you that they only “chores” I do are cooking and baking? Personally, I view those as hobbies, so they certainly don’t feel like chores. Would you be surprised if I told you that the first thing …
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 09:09 PM
2

Sorry to hear about your recent breakup. Hopefully there are great things ahead for you in 2020!
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 08:20 PM
1

Can you elaborate on why you feel bad for me?
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 08:09 PM
2

It’s great that you took holiday preference into consideration when vetting your husband! Have your been married for a while or is this your first Christmas together as a married couple?
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 07:51 PM
2

To clarify, I believe what you’re asking is “Would your husband be okay with you not attending Christmas events for his family?” The answer is yes! My husbands going to visit his family solo later this week.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 07:30 PM
2

It’s great that you can see appreciation and thankfulness is his everyday actions.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 07:16 PM
0

Of course they could! If mom or dad doesn’t want to go to an event, they simply don’t go. If they don’t want to host large family gatherings at their home, then the family can find somewhere else. If one spouse isn’t a big fan of holidays, then they can purchase the child things they want thought the year. I have no doubt that there are families that put very little emphasis on presents, and those children grow up to be happy and healthy.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 07:02 PM
-5

I guess from my perspective, I know my husband loves and appreciates me because we’re together. Knowing this means I don’t need a thank you or a gift when I do something special. Be open to receiving thanks and appreciation in a multitude of ways. Don’t restrict yourself to just words or gifts.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:56 PM
-1

If my husband didn’t want to spend time with my family, or host my family on the holiday, I wouldn’t expect him to participate anyway. My husband is incredible all year, and not receiving a gift on Christmas wouldn’t change that. My husband is retired and is the one who has done all of the home preparations this year, but in years past I did all of the present buying and wrapping, because I was the one who wanted to ensure we provided gifts. If holidays aren’t important to your (speaking general…
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:43 PM
-4

Many women hold themselves to much higher standards than their husbands around the holiday season. If he would’ve been happy with ham sandwiches and chips for Christmas dinner, and you insist on a 5 course meal instead, who are you really doing that for? Clearly not your husband, because he didn’t ask for it. If you’re cleaning, cooking and wrapping presents in search of a gift or a thank you, then you’re doing those activities for the wrong reasons.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:37 PM
3

Many of us, are conditioned from the time that we are little children to believe we can only receive items we want (and do not need) as gifts. We teach kids delayed gratification by forcing them to wait until their birthday or Easter or Christmas to receive items they really want. Unfortunately, as adults, we don’t grow out of that conditioning and realize we can buy “fun” items throughout the year as we can afford them. This leads to a consumeristic obsession with gift giving around the holiday…
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:31 PM
-6

Do you only receive joy from giving, because you’re expecting something in return? If the act of receiving a gift, creates the necessary obligation to gift something in return, then it isn’t a gift that is freely given.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:26 PM
-6

Why do you feel you need and/or deserve a gift? How does your anger help you love your husband and appreciate him for the things he does for you all year?
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 06:13 PM
2

What’s your plan for meeting high value men that can support a stay at home wife? What will you do if you never find one?
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/19 12:35 PM
22

Can you give an example of what’s bothering you? Sometimes, my DH sings weird songs that he’s made up. Usually I can tune it out, but sometimes when I’m really try to focus on something it does annoy me. I always just say “Hey, I’m really sorry, but your singing is keeping me from focusing.” I don’t tell him to stop, I don’t tell him to go out to the garage if he wants to keep singing, I just tell him that it’s interfering with what I’m doing. He always just stops. No questions asked. And it’s n…
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/19 04:29 PM
5

DH and I both love being super casual at home. For me, that usually means leggings and a T-shirt. For him, that’s sweat pants or athletic shorts and a T-shirt. Sometimes we’ll go out in casual outfits like when we’re going to the gym, or have to run to the grocery store. When we go out on dates or to events, we always wear at least jeans. Have you clarified with him in what situations he prefers this dress? Surely he doesn’t mean that he expects you to dress super casual 24/7/365.
/r/RedPillWomen23/12/19 01:50 PM
2

I guess we have very different husbands and relationships. When we tell each other we don’t want anything, we truly mean it. No covert contracts for us. Plus, I show appreciation for my husband 24/7/365. There’s no need for an orchestrated appreciation “boost” on Christmas.
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/19 01:35 PM
1

I disagree. Saying you want nothing, but actually expecting something is a covert convert. When I say I don’t want anything, I mean it, and I say that as someone who is their own provider (and the sole provider in our family). I would rather just buy what I want when I want it. I’ll accept a nicely written card, but truly don’t want anything else.
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/19 03:32 AM
16

my masculine traits are raging What traits of yours do you believe are masculine? Knowing this might help
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/19 09:28 PM
7

This is the correct answer. If he’s said he doesn’t want anything, then take him at his word.
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/19 01:01 PM
3

All great ideas! Honestly we just don’t want to decorate at all. It isn’t important to us, and neither of us what to take the time to do it. Overall, I think a faux tree and some lights aren’t that bad. It means we can put up one thing and be considered festive. And, it all fits in one tote that we can store out in our garden shed the rest of the year.
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/19 12:12 PM
1

I don’t think it’s necessarily a part of feminism, but I think more women should consider private marriage as an alternative to legal marriage. I’m not keen on the idea of being legally married to my husband, because I would never know if he was with me because he loved me or because he didn’t want to go through the expensive, risky process of divorce. Even though my husband is pretty insulated from the risks of divorce (He is the one who is retired and stays home, we have equal levels of educat…
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/19 01:13 AM
5

Maybe that’s what I’ll try next year. It sounds braggadocios, but no one in our family needs anything. We can all just buy things we want and need throughout the year. DH and I always feel like we have to invent items for our lists each year, and we’d rather just buy things for ourselves. Next year, I’ll tell everyone to just tell me one really nice thing they want and maybe that will prevent people from getting lots of little things they don’t really want.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 08:25 PM
3

There’s only going to be 4 of us, and I don’t want weeks worth of leftovers, so I’m keeping it pretty simple: Christmas Eve *Lasagna *Cesar Salad *Focaccia *All the Christmas cookies Christmas Day *Cinnamon rolls for breakfast *Ham with a spicy orange glaze *Mashed potatoes *Stuffing (my husband’s fav) *Green bean casserole *Deviled Eggs *Rolls *Chocolate Pie I’ll also buy some Hawaiian rolls so I can make sandwiches out of the leftover ham, either that night or the next day. I make stupid amoun…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 06:27 PM
10

DH and I aren’t holiday people. We’re pretty minimalist, and therefore not super into decorating. To us, decorations are just crap you have to store 11 months out of the year. Our attitude is a big disappointment to my parents, so we did put up a Christmas tree this year to placate them. We’ve tried for years to convince people we don’t want presents, including refusing to build a wedding registry and explicitly telling people their presence was present enough for us. Unfortunately, no one liste…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/19 03:59 PM
1

This is her BF, not her husband, and they don’t even live together. At 3 years, this is an incredibly low level of commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/19 08:52 PM
3

Generally, I believe the advice from this sub has been to end things with your BF and move on. Your BF is an extreme mama’s boy, and has not demonstrated that he is willing to leave and cleave. He will not change. His mother will not change. There is nothing you can do to make them change, but you can remove yourself from the equation.
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/19 06:15 PM
2

There’s only going to be 4 of us, and I don’t want weeks worth of leftover, so I’m keeping it pretty simple: Christmas Eve *Lasagna *Cesar Salad *Focaccia *All the Christmas cookies Christmas Day *Cinnamon rolls for breakfast *Ham with a spicy orange glaze *Mashed potatoes *Stuffing (my husband’s fav) *Green bean casserole *Deviled Eggs *Rolls *Chocolate Pie I’ll also buy some Hawaiian rolls so I can make sandwiches out of the leftover ham, either that night or the next day. I make stupid amount…
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/19 04:37 PM
1

I 100% agree with you. I would never write something like that or advocate for co-dependency. That quote is from another participant’s history.
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/19 05:04 PM
1

I think being emotionally dependent on a spouse is called love and marriage. I don’t get wanting to be independent from a spouse if I wanted that I would stay single. Temper your expectations.
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/19 12:14 AM
6

We always have stuff for salads on hand. Spinach and arugula, some pears or apples, maybe some figs, Bleu cheese, Gorgonzola or goat cheese, walnuts or pecans, pomegranate or dried cranberries or even dried cherries are good, then the basics like cucumber, red onion, carrots, tomato, peppers, radishes, etc. We do chicken, steak or salmon as a protein. Whip up a quick made from scratch dressing (usually balsamic or honey mustard vinaigrette) in a mason jar, and boom a gourmet salad. Otherwise, we…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/19 07:58 PM
-15

Really, he doesn’t workout? Does he not work out because he can’t wear the clothes he needs? My husband is retired, so he’s always at the gym, then running errands afterwards, or fixing things around the house. I’m honestly not sure what he would wear most of the time if I banned athletic pants.
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/19 07:29 PM
13

My husband would never ... wear[] basketball shorts in public because he knows I don’t like how those look. To me, this is a very weird preference. What does he wear when he goes to the gym? Is he permitted to wear shorts at all? What’s the difference between athletic shorts and golf shorts? Can he wear swim trunks? For some women, their hair becomes finer, maybe even thinner, and doesn’t grow as quickly as the age. Long hair styles might stop looking full and healthy for some women, at some poi…
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/19 06:50 PM
2

I still don’t get the obsession with hobbies. Why does he need to have hobbies? Does working not engage his brain? Does traveling not engage his brain? Does talking with friends and family not engage his brain? I’ve never really had hobbies. I’m not artistic. I’m not into photography. I didn’t want to continue playing organized sports after high school. I don’t like to collect things, because that seems like hoarding to me. But, I’ve still managed to have an extremely fulfilling life where I’ve …
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/19 10:27 PM
4

Also, the gaming thing actually concerns me. He spends 6-8 hours a week gaming, which is okay according to me. I don't think he's addicted. But having that as his only hobby is a bit concerning. 6-8 hours is nothing. That’s could ~1 hour a day, or 4 hours a day in the weekend, or any combination in between. You said he also reads and travels a lot, so it seems like he has other interests. As someone who works a lot, I don’t get the obsession with having a bunch of hobbies. Between working 50-60 …
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/19 09:04 PM
1

Why can’t he go back to school and you buy a house? I went to grad school a huge scholarship and my husband and I bought our second home while we were both in grad school. I’m your age and starting the process of buying an income property. You can do anything if you work hard enough.
/r/RedPillWomen04/12/19 01:32 PM
9

He makes more than I do, but my career has more opportunities. So, what’s preventing you from earning more to ease the financial burden and achieve the goal of buying a house and having kids sooner? I would love to have my man buy me a house that I can take care of. Oh, I guess this is why you won’t help ease the burden. You need him to buy it for you. What have you done to inspire such a large financial commitment? Why do you deserve a house and the ability to stay home? Money isn’t the issue, …
/r/RedPillWomen04/12/19 03:54 AM
7

I honestly don’t think my husband has gone out on a Friday or Saturday without me since we met. But, if he did want to go out, I’d probably just skip dinner and go straight to bed. I looove to sleep.
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/19 04:57 AM
21

Don’t marry someone you wouldn’t vote for.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/19 11:43 PM
2

If you have enough time to read Reddit posts on SAHP and be offended, then you might not have enough hobbies.
/r/RedPillWomen06/11/19 12:52 AM
1

I think this is great advice for the vast majority of women. My husband and I have a different dynamic for a variety of reasons (private marriage, child-free and since we FIRE he’s already retired), so there are always some pieces of red pill advice that don’t really resonate with me. I think one piece of advice that’s missing is for women to marry young, ideally before age 25. After that, they will have been living independently and self supporting for long enough that it will be difficult for …
/r/RedPillWomen01/11/19 08:55 PM
6

Get therapy. You’re not mature enough for dating, because you haven’t accepted that you are responsible for your own happiness. It is not a SOs responsibility to make you happy. You need to have your own fulfilling and joyous life, and the clinginess will resolve itself.
/r/RedPillWomen31/10/19 07:02 PM
4

While you may feel financially stable, your husband may not feel the same way. If he believes he needs to be earning more, he’s unlikely to vocalize that to you or anyone else. Plus, he knows he has to work for over two more decades to provide for his family. Has he expressed interest in wanting to leave the work force and retire early or start his own business? He may be so disappointed not only because he didn’t see that he was getting played, but because this also sets him back from some othe…
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 07:44 PM
17

He feels used and lied to by the company he worked so hard for He probably feels like an absolute idiot for trusting the hospital/the company he works for to follow through on this deal. Rightfully so, because I don’t know how someone who has been in the working world this long would still trust their employer to follow through on a promise. From your post history, it sounds like you have children, so retirement likely isn’t an option for him. He knows he has to work to support his family and th…
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 06:55 PM
5

From your description, it sounds like your bf is a hoarder. Conversation, logic and reasoning doesn’t work with hoarders when you are talking about their personal possession. He needs therapy. Ideally, the therapist would be able to visit his home to see how he is living and work with him to determine his attachment to specific items and help him “release” that attachment.
/r/RedPillWomen30/10/19 02:10 PM
1

I doubt he evens thinks private marriage is on the table. Very few women nag their partners for a private marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen22/10/19 09:18 PM
-1

Legal marriage shouldn’t be the standard for proving you love someone fiercely. If that’s OP’s standard, then the message that sends is that all she wants is the wedding and marriage and it doesn’t matter to whom. How is that supposed to make her BF feel loved and cherished?
/r/RedPillWomen22/10/19 04:01 PM
-1

Here’s a different perspective: You are 28 (or just shy of turning 28). 28! If you want to start over and find a new SO, you will have to move countries (again), find new housing (again), find a new job (again), and then begin the dating and vetting process over. There is absolutely no guarantee that you will even find another man that wants to be in a LTR with you , and with fewer and fewer me interested in legal marriage there’s certainly no guarantee you’ll find someone who will want to marry…
/r/RedPillWomen22/10/19 03:58 PM
1

My nanny is like a grandmother to me. I still talk to her and visit her often. We’ve always been very close. Just like not everyone’s life is nice generally, I don’t expect everyone to have had great experience with nannies, daycares, SAHP, family members, etc. But, this notion that mothers staying home with their children is universally the best thing is harmful. Not every woman wants to stay home with her kids, and that is not automatically a bad thing. I’m very, very thankful for the upbringi…
/r/RedPillWomen22/10/19 03:25 AM
2

It sounds like her BF only wants her to stay home during her maternity leave (I’m assuming they’re not in the US, so maternity leave is probably close to 12 months). Even if OP only makes slightly more than the cost of daycare, it is clear that her BF would rather have the her working. I had a nanny growing up and it was the best! My parents were never frazzled around me (some of my friends SAHMs were absolutely craycray) and I had another adult in my life who loved me. Additionally, both of my …
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/19 04:57 PM
2

Not every man wants the liability of a SAHW/M. Think of it this way, by having you stay at home, he’s likely guaranteeing that he will have to retire much later. There may be other financial goals he’d have to give up: buying a vacation home, being able to fully fund your children’s education, helping to support one of his parents. Also, maybe he wants to be the stay at home spouse. My husband stays at home and loves it! He gets so much more done than I could like mowing the lawn, yard work, rep…
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/19 11:40 AM
1

Well, have you asked your husband what he thinks? I would start there.
/r/RedPillWomen19/10/19 04:30 PM
1

It is clear you are not an attorney
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/19 02:14 AM
1

A lot of what you’ve written is false, at least in the US. There are documents (wills, trusts, PoA, medical directives, etc.) that can give you 99.9% of the rights of a spouse. The only difference is you file taxes separately.
/r/RedPillWomen15/10/19 10:51 PM
7

What benefit will you get from marriage that you don’t already have? What do you stand to lose if you leave your boyfriend because he doesn’t want to enter into a contract with the state? Even if you’re not legally married, you can still have an equally wonderful and fulfilling private marriage. You can still have a wedding, go on a honeymoon, change your name, wear wedding rings, and refer to each other as husband and wife. You don’t need the state to allow you to do any of those things. Person…
/r/RedPillWomen15/10/19 11:34 AM
6

You’re the only one saying that no woman, ever, not a single one, should ever serve in a leadership role or own a business.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 08:37 PM
4

Relationships should not be this much work to get off the ground.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 07:46 PM
6

I have the attention span of a defective goldfish. This was from 7 days ago, so I guess the struggle continues.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 07:44 PM
2

I struggled with being productive as a child and teen, always waiting last minute to do anything important or putting off things that werent absolutely necessary Not exactly the makeup of a star employee. Poor performance may explain your past experiences.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 06:13 PM
–

Medium rare steak, mostly. My husband is also slowly cleaning and reorganizing our office, which will be nice when I work from home and on the weekends.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/19 05:45 PM
8

I’ve had both male and female bosses, and so far I’ve preferred the women. They have been so much more focused and detail oriented. I’ve also always been more impressed with their communication and interpersonal skills. But, I work in a heavily male dominated field, so the women who rise to the top really are exceptional. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve liked my male bosses too, but they always kept you guessing about exactly what they were looking for on a project which can be frustrating.
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/19 08:11 PM
1

I get why it’s a token line on RPW. It makes for a convenient argument on why women shouldn’t have to work. Problem is, that having a SAHW (as that role is viewed on RPW) has never been a reality for certain socioeconomic and racial groups.
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/19 09:49 PM
15

What a revisionist, white-washed take on history! Women have always worked outside of the home. Let me say that one more time for the people in the back, women have always worked outside of the home.
/r/RedPillWomen08/10/19 01:54 PM
-3

The only difference between our marriages is that mine only involves two parties, myself and my husband. Your marriage also involves the state. I'm the sole beneficiary of my husband's will. I have the right to make medical decisions if he is unable. I have his power of attorney. We got to determine the terms of our marriage contract, we didn't leave it to the government's one size fits all approach. Boohoo I'm not a legal wife. Woe was me. I'm so deprived.
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 02:25 AM
-3

It’s cute that you tried to trivialize my marriage by referring to my husband has my boyfriend. My husband didn’t have to give up anything to be with me. He didn’t have to risk his assists. He didn’t have to give up his family. Unfortunately your husband has had to do both. That is why the threads opinion doesn’t matter. This decision has to be between you and your husband, and if he doesn’t want you to stop working then you have to STFU and let him lead. You talk a lot about what you like and w…
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/19 01:00 AM
1

We eat a low-carb (50g of carbs or less) diet. Typically we stay keto (20g of carbs or less), but sometimes incorporate a few more carbs as our workout plans change. That means no homemade pasta for us. An average day looks like this: Breakfast: Eggs and Bacon Lunch: Salad Dinner: Grilled meat plus a green veggie We might have some berries and whipped cream or a square of 90% dark chocolate for dessert every now and then, but I don’t make frankenfood keto desserts like some people. Our meals are…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 11:55 PM
1

We’re child-free, so I’m not concerned with children. But, if we did have kids my husband would be home with them full time and then we’d both be home full time after a couple of years. Even if we’re not married, we could still reach a custody agreement and arrange for child support if necessary. Personally, I don’t want my husband to stay with me just because he’s worried about losing a substantial portion of his net worth. I feel like it gives us a deeper bond.
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 11:39 PM
4

My husband is in his early 30s and retired earlier this year. He is retired which means he has passive income, investments and saving sufficient to support himself for the rest of his life. I’m several years younger, and will be able to retire around age 35 or so depending the type of income property I decide to buy. I am married. According to divorce laws I am pretty much secured when it comes to finances and I would be capable to live for more than 10 years without working with the savings I c…
/r/RedPillWomen06/10/19 08:56 PM
21

You need to start seeing a therapist ASAP. You engage in self harming behaviors, and look to make extreme changes to appease others. This is not healthy behavior for anyone, but particularly not a 15 year old. Talk to your parents about getting into therapy. Typically, behavioral therapy is covered for dependents under 18, even if your health insurance doesn’t cover therapy generally. Ideally, you’ll establish a relationship with a therapist and then you’ll see a psychologist who can work with y…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/19 05:53 PM
2

My guess is his response to the marriage question has been the same throughout your 3 year relationship. If that’s the case, then you need to accept responsibility for staying with him for this long even though your goals don’t match up.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/19 02:37 AM
6

Maybe you should write some tips on how to distinguish and vet frat bros, since you’ve navigated it so perfectly.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/19 11:51 PM
6

Bros don’t have any problem telling women that they’re dating to get them in the sack.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/19 11:43 PM
10

As someone who was in a sorority at a major university and is now happily married, this is garbage advice. Wait till you’ve at least gone on a REAL date or two to hook up, and don’t have sex until you’re dating. Very, very few men in their early 20s are marriage minded and looking for relationships that will lead to marriage. Following the above advice is how you rack up a double digit n-count before you’re halfway through your college career.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/19 11:35 PM
3

I deserve to be happy too You need to be 100% happy on your own before looking for a relationship. It is not your SO’s responsibility to make you happy. If you rely on your future SO for happiness, both of you will be miserable.
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/19 08:42 PM
10

I eat breakfast before I leave home. Most days, I have two eggs and a rotating breakfast meat (bacon, sausage, or ham). I have that with ~16 oz of cold brew. If I’m in a rush, I’ll pack a protein shake and two hard boiled eggs. For lunch, I typically pack left over meat from the night before, cottage cheese topped with a healthy dose of Everything But the Bagel seasoning, and pickles. Sometimes I’ll also do mason jar salads. There are like a million different ideas for mason jar salads on Pinter…
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/19 06:28 PM
8

I agree that it varies greatly from relationship to relationship. In my husband’s case, he got to retire in his early 30’s, which was 7-10 years earlier than he would’ve been able to retire on his own. In large part, that is because I am able to provide him with great health insurance because we are considered domestic partners. In order to meet those requirements, it required a good amount of legal commitment (living together, being the beneficiaries of each other’s life insurance policies, sha…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/19 03:07 PM
5

Men and women socialize differently. I believe sex is important in this conversation, because homeschooled boys are going to have different perspectives from homeschooled girls. In talking about the differences between the sexes, I think it is important for a participant in this conversation to be able to provide some reasoning on their perspective. Homeschooling may be more damaging (or beneficial) for boys than it is for girls, and I think erasing sex would greatly limit this specific thread.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/19 04:52 PM
1

Does your husband have a backup plan for what he is going to do when he is fired for violating his company’s confidentiality policy when they find out he’s sharing such a large amount of information with you?
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/19 09:34 PM
5

I would definitely be willing to do a post! It would be helpful if I had specific questions to answer, so if anyone wants to suggest some I can work on a post this weekend.
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 06:56 PM
9

I agree that most men and women decompress in different ways, but my partner doesn’t have an after work ritual, so I contributed mine. Many women on this sub work, and either aren’t there to greet their husband or they get home at the same time. Personally, while I may have to work at home some nights, I don’t bring the stress of work home and allow it to impact my marriage. I don’t complain about work to my husband and I don’t give him a play by play of my day. Generally once I get home, I don’…
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 04:13 AM
12

My husband is retired, so he’s the one that greets me when I get home from work. I work in a high stress, male dominated field, so I appreciate the need to decompress. Personally, my commute home is enough time to “forget” (technically I’m at work 24/7/365) about work for the night. Listening to some music during the commute is a great way to get into a different frame of mind. This allows me to always be in a good mood when I get home and greet my husband with a smile. Then, I change out of my …
/r/RedPillWomen21/08/19 03:24 AM
6

I think what she’s trying to say is that if OP says for example “That’s very painful, can we please stop or try something else?” and her husband pressures her to keep going or doesn’t listen and keeps having sex with her in the same, painful manner, then that is an issue. Sure the act of attempting to have sex is consensual, but I would hope that you agree that OP is allowed to express that she’s in pain and ask her husband to stop or do something different to help alleviate that pain. It would …
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/19 02:33 PM
2

Did you do pre-marital counseling? I ask because these are the exact types of questions and issues that are covered in premarital counseling. If you did do pre-marital counseling or discussed these issues independently (it seems like you were fully aware of the housing situation at least) then you were on notice of these issues and still entered into the marriage. In regards to the living situation, you knew you would have to quit your job and move into a tiny apartment 45 minutes away from home…
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/19 03:26 AM
4

Typically, the elements of common law marriage are (1) the ability to consent (2) an intent to be married (3) publicly holding yourselves out as husband and wife and (4) cohabitation. The interpretation of these elements vary from state to state, but these are the basics. Changing your name may contribute to the element of holding yourselves out as husband and wife, but it is not required. Women who obtain marriage licenses are not required to change their names, and they can do it on the marria…
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/19 01:33 PM
6

FYI - Common law marriage only exists as a legal concept in Colorado, Iowa, Kansas, Montana, Rhode Island, Texas, Utah, and DC if you live in the US. I would consult with an attorney to see if a divorce is even required in your situation.
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/19 01:08 AM
3

Less than 60 days ago, OP took her 6 year old (not sure if it’s her husband’s because they’ve only been married for 2 years and she claims they married within 3 weeks of meeting, so it seems unlikely) and her 5 month old and left her marital home without any real plan. Sounds like she was able to squat at her sister’s house, but that went so poorly that I can see why she went running back to her husband begging him to take her back. Post here for reference This was less than 60 days ago. There h…
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/19 09:30 PM
-1

I assumed control BECAUSE of my job. My job taught me to treat people like they were inept with all its training. I mothered him because I had a job that literally taught me to treat people like they were slow. k.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/19 04:02 PM
2

Again I want to say that my job is what taught me to treat people like they are inept babies. Accept responsibility here. You made a conscious decision to disrespect your husband by treating him like an inept baby. Your job did not force you to act like that. It is not your jobs fault that you are unable to compartmentalize. You are 100% responsible for your actions and reactions, and unless you accept that you’ll just find another scapegoat and slide back right to where you were before.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/19 03:49 PM
2

I make everything from scratch as well. Here’s a sample menu for a week in our house: Monday: Grilled kielbasa with roasted onions, peppers and sweet potatoes. I’ll serve it with a homemade bbq sauce and homemade bread to sop up all the yummy juices. If I’m feeling up to it, I’ll also make a batch of chocolate chunk cookies to have around for the week. Tuesday: Sweet and Spicy Pineapple Chicken served over white rice. Wednesday: Leftover, because Tuesdays recipe gets so much better each day Thur…
/r/RedPillWomen06/08/19 12:09 AM
5

First, I will state that I think it is incredibly odd that your husband doesn’t do anything around the house. When we were both working, my husband did at least 50% of the work around the house. For example, if he was washing, I was drying. Sounds like you spend an inordinate amount of time cooking each day. We aren’t big one breakfast, so we usually just grab a protein bar or hard boiled eggs to go. If my husband wants breakfast, it’s as easy as making a piece of toast, slathering it with avoca…
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/19 09:21 PM
1

How big is your house that you can’t keep it clean with a little maintenance during the week and a couple of hours on the weekends? When my husband and I were both working, we were able to keep our large home clean and tidy with an hour or so each night and 3-5 hours on the weekends. I also work 40-60 hours a week depending only the season, and we have healthy, made from scratch, home cooked meals. What are you doing now that’s so inefficient?
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/19 05:22 PM
5

I believe your analogy misses the point. A relationship that relies solely on physical attraction and sex, is unlikely to be life long. In any marriage, there will be periods where sex is off the table and people age. In my own relationship, there have been periods where both of us have been able to have sex for extended periods due surgery and/or illness. While we’re child-free, my understanding is that there are periods during pregnancy and post-childbirth where sex may be off the table. And f…
/r/RedPillWomen31/07/19 11:38 AM
1

He was all for legal marriage, foregoing it was actually something I pushed for. We still had a big wedding and refer to ourselves as husband and wife, there’s just no marriage contract. We both have the same post-graduate professional degree. If you look through my post history it will be very obvious which one.
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/19 07:41 PM
3

It was not directly important, but it important in a lot of indirect ways. I wanted someone who was from a similar socioeconomic background and who valued education. My husband comes from a similar background and we have identical educational attainment. Our background typically leads to high salaries. We are both FIRE and child free, and my husband is already retired. Currently he does not contribute financially as all of his passive income is reinvested. I provide health insurance, savings, co…
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/19 07:21 PM
5

Dammit, I’ll have to tell my husband he’s a woman! He’ll be so disappointed.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 10:17 PM
7

There isn't a degree in the world that'll get his dick hard. There is much more to a successful marriage than sex. It's a nice thing to have but it's unnecessary. Different men have different requirements. For example, my husband was only interested in LTRs with women who had graduated from college. A graduate degree was preferred, but obviously that’s not a requirement for some professions. When you look at his family and friends, everyone has gone to graduate school. For some men, a certain le…
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/19 08:37 PM
3

One option is to just keep doing what you are doing and stop worrying about "breaking the girl code." It’s ridiculous and unhealthy, so keep doing what you’re doing. Never change. Same sentiments as the deleted comment. I believe this removal was too heavy handed.
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/19 01:19 AM
14

And I get the distinct feeling that I’m breaking the girl code of frumpy stay at home moms, and it’s not going over well within the clique. Maybe they can sense that you think they’re frumpy, and don’t appreciate your attitude. People can get down on leggings and yoga pants all they want, but my husband loves them. I change into leggings or athletic shorts when I get home and pair them with a sports bra and tight T-shirt. My husband loves that he can see the curves I work hard for. Unless I was …
/r/RedPillWomen26/07/19 02:34 PM
1

Let me know when you have something more than a low quality ad hominem attack.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 06:20 PM
2

But we should judge the impact the strategy has on us. Alternatively, women could accept that we allow the strategy to have an impact and accept responsibility for our role in the success of the Dylan archetype. We can only control ourselves, and the Dylan archetype seems like just another want for women to deflect responsibility. Women will of course laugh it off because if they ever fell for him, they realize it was their own damn fault. They can't believe they fell for their own tricks turned…
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 01:59 PM
26

I know there’s no way to learn about you and your sisters entire relationship and dynamic from one post, but after reading this post I really feel for your sister. It seems like you’re always waiting in the wings to be a tattle tale. Your sister is allowed to be possessive of her fiancé. If you don’t stop now, you’ll like end up without a sister.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/19 11:29 AM
-8

I’m still in my mid-20s, so not too old. I guess I just don’t see the benefit of discussing the Dylan archetype without offering actionable advice.
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/19 08:59 PM
9

I think it would be beneficial to clarify this in the intro to the post.
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/19 07:07 PM
30

Can you clarify the take away from this post? Are we ripping on Dylan? Alexandra? The hypothetical “you”? Everyone?
/r/RedPillWomen23/07/19 05:47 PM
1

My personal opinion is that 3 times on 6 months is a lot considering your BF’s age. He has told you that he is unsure if he wants marriage or children. I do not believe that warrants further discussion. If changes his mind and wants marriage and children with you, he will make sure you know.
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/19 05:19 PM
2

My questions are, is being unsure about the future a deal breaker? You have to decide that. To some extent, everyone is unsure about their future, because we can’t control every aspect of our lives. At this age, it is common and expected to constantly be growing and evolving your goals. Are these reasonable topics of discussion considering our age and length of relationship? While it is important to state that you want marriage and children, I believe it is inappropriate to constantly harp on th…
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/19 05:03 PM
7

How is being independent and having a busy and fulfilling life playing childish games?
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/19 03:55 PM
15

I would highly recommend participating in recruitment. You’ll meet lots of other women on your campus, including the other freshman that are participating. At my school, there were a lot of girls that became close friends during recruitment even though they didn’t join the same sorority. No one who has commented thus far was ever even in a sorority, so I’ll give you my take. I’m very glad that I joined a sorority in college. It gave me a great group of friends, and provided me with a home for fo…
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/19 11:20 PM
5

also i don't get why you call me boring ??? it's not the point It is 100% the point. You can only change yourself. You cannot change him. My husband is in his early 30s and retired. He stays home full time. As you can imagine none of his friends are retired, so he fills his days with hobbies and projects around the house. He could easily “spam” me all day. He has the time to call, text, email and whatever none stop. If he did that, I would be so busy at work, volunteering, hanging with friends o…
/r/RedPillWomen15/07/19 12:04 AM
-1

If he was very extroverted, had tons of his own hobbies, and had his own, large friend group, then he wouldn’t be hanging out with you 24/7/365. Regardless of his issues, that you may be unable to see, the fact that you’re free and available 24/7/365 because you have no friends or hobbies is an issue. It is healthy and normal to be so busy that you can’t reply to calls or texts as soon as you receive. It is okay to turn out dates because you already have plans with friends or have another hobby …
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/19 11:43 PM
3

First, I think the fact that you left out your age and the age of your boyfriend is a big issue. It is causing you to receive advice for mature, adult relationships. You are not in a mature relationship. You are 17 and in high school. My guess is your boyfriend is also in high school. You are extremely shy and introverted, which means you don’t have many friends and a lack luster social life. My guess is your boyfriend is in the same position. When your world is small, and you don’t have indepen…
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/19 11:04 PM
-1

In the moment a guy decides to approach you (or swipe right (Is it right? I’ve never used online dating.)) all he cares about is how physically attractive you are. He doesn’t know anything else about you except for how you look. Looking like a “sour biotch” is, well, how you look and how physically attractive you are.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 08:26 PM
5

Attractiveness is the end all be all for attracting men. Once you’ve attracted a man, that’s when personality comes into play.
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/19 05:54 PM
1

Personally, I don’t care what Psychology Today has to say on the topic because I’m writing a survey or doing a study on emotional affairs. This is a thought experiment and each reader needs to determine their own individual definition for both physical and emotional cheating.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/19 07:12 PM
19

I clearly stated that I chose p in v sex out of ease, not because it is the only acceptable threshold. Everyone needs to determine their own boundaries on what they consider cheating.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/19 06:53 PM
27

The distinct difference between emotional and physical cheating, is that with physical cheating there’s a specific act that you can point to. Everyone has their boundary for what they consider physical cheating. For some women the threshold is low and even looking at another woman is what they consider cheating. For ease, I will use p in v sex as the threshold. In your first example, you talk about interactions with a grocer. They chat for 30 minutes each time you go to the store (where do you l…
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/19 06:35 PM
14

For me, cheating is a relationship ender. But, I can understand why some women may decide to stay in a relationship with a man who has cheated. I cannot pretend to know what it’s like to be pregnant or have children, and I am able to independently support myself. If I found out my husband cheated, I would simply pack my things and move out. There would be no need to fight, because he’s definitively spoken with his actions. Granted, we are not legally married and have set things up in such a way …
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/19 02:18 PM
1

You still think about your ex, you’re not sexually attracted to your bf and you are generally aimless about what you want to do with your life. What are you going to do if your bf leaves you? What’s your back up plan?
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/19 01:23 AM
9

My anecdotal experience, has been that couples who meet before either one is 22-23 tend to date the longest before marriage. Especially for those couples who began dating in high school, it seems the male partner has little to no desire to get married. My take on this, is that the time spend dating from 16-23 means very little for men. It’s the time dating as “adults” that is significant. In your case, you haven’t spent any time dating as adults because neither of you are independent. Have you c…
/r/RedPillWomen03/07/19 03:53 PM
19

I quickly and enthusiastically responded when he called or texted me. He played several sports and was a member of a couple of adult leagues and he invited me to his games. I made it a regular part of my schedule and only missed if I had something that was impossible to do at another time. Most weeks, I was the only wife or girlfriend there, even though I know other men invited their SOs. I baked and cooked for him. I wrote him notes thanking him for planning fun dates or paying for thing and of…
/r/RedPillWomen02/07/19 06:12 PM
11

I think one of the best things I did while courting my now husband was to never initiate conversation or dates. He lead the entire time. I would only call or text if he had explicitly asked me to. For example, I would text him that I had arrived home safely if he had asked me to at the end of a date. This allowed me to feel very confident in his interest and commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen02/07/19 05:50 PM
0

When he does physical things you don’t appreciate (grabbing your bottom or breasts) say “Ouch that hurts.” That’s a gentle way to let him know the behavior is unwelcome. When he shows affections in ways you do like, thank him and tell him “I feel so incredibly loved when you do X.” If you want to make out, initiate making out. If I want to make out, I initiate and make-out my husband. He’s never turned me down. I’ll do the same during sex and pull him close for a deep kiss. Again, he’s never com…
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/19 06:34 PM
-3

Chill out
/r/RedPillWomen30/06/19 10:07 PM
6

Ask him directly what response he is looking for. For most couples, I would imagine that he is simply looking to vent, have his feelings validated and receive affirmation that you will love and support him no matter what happens at work. My husband and I are in a unique situation where we work in the same field and I know most the the “players” in his stories. So, I ask him if he’s looking to vent or if he wants to know what I would do in his situation. If he just wants to vent, then I make sure…
/r/RedPillWomen30/06/19 08:22 PM
46

I would caution you not to take any action or draw any conclusions about yourself based on the posts in this thread. Our bodies reaction to birth control is very personal, and no two bodies are the same. Please continue to work with your doctor to find the right solution for you.
/r/RedPillWomen30/06/19 08:17 PM
1

Good luck getting your tubes tied. It has been literally impossible to find a doctor willing to do the procedure on someone in their mid-late 20s.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 07:43 PM
8

My husband and I aren’t legally married (there’s no point, but that’s a different topic), but I never had a problem finding child free men to date who were interested in marriage. Honestly, my friends who want marriage and children have had a much harder time finding LTRs or marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 07:36 PM
3

Thank you! For cohesiveness sake, and to ensure the thread focuses on quality advice, I’m going to remove my comments as well.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 06:17 PM
51

I have no maternal instincts. Children disgust me. Heck, I didn’t like kids when I was one. There have always been women who felt this, but many did have the option to opt out of reproduction.
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 06:15 PM
1

Family court judges are often psychopaths who will automatically side with the most toxic party because they thrive on drama and pain. Who hurt you?
/r/RedPillWomen28/06/19 06:00 PM
1

How’s your passionless marriage going? Have you finally gotten that divorce you told your husband you wanted? Are the guys you try to cheat with still ghostin’ ya or only treating you as a fwb?
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/19 08:39 AM
2

I’m a litigator at a large corporate.The only people who don’t have any kinds of interpersonal conflict in my field are secretaries. Same profession, similar practice, very different outcomes. I’ve seen this play out with other associates around (and at this point under) me, but haven’t struggled with the same issues.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/19 12:44 PM
5

You’re use of the word crush makes this post confusing. Please answer the following questions: What is the problem, and what do you think is the root of the issue? How have you contributed/attempted to mitigate the problem? What is your current relationship status and length of time?
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/19 02:07 AM
2

Just to clarify, this is just your crush? This isn’t your husband, LTR or even boyfriend?
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/19 01:54 AM
5

I have never had an interpersonal conflict in the workplace, and have achieved incredible success my employing this mindset. If you believe you have nothing to learn from my experience, that is your call to make.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/19 03:39 PM
4

I think you have a self fulfilling prophecy on your hands. At a certain point, when you’ve been through 3 positions at 3 different organizations, the common thread is you. You decide if you are a victim or not, and right now you are playing the victim. Personally, I attribute a lot of my success to the fact that I’m a team player and not competitive. I work in a heavily male dominated profession that is known to attract competitive personalities and I feel that my personality sets me apart from …
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/19 03:04 PM
1

I would take this to /r/asktrp
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/19 06:32 PM
1

You can’t raise your children not to go bald or grey ...
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/19 06:30 PM
1

Yeah, several got fat, started balding, have broken families, failed careers & some of them even slipped into drugs. started balding Weird
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/19 11:45 AM
1

Looks like there may have been some truth to both of our assessments.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/19 02:22 PM
3

Also, men probably won’t tell you the truth in front of you because it’ll upset you and most blue pill men aren’t up for that. They’ll only say in their inside voice. I can see why that’s your experience.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/19 11:19 PM
13

My husband runs in a circle of high value men. Those that are married, are married to women with 5 years of their own age. Among those that aren’t married, and in their early 30s (your recommend range for OP), none of them take women around OP’s age (18-21) seriously. They’re happy to pick them up on Tinder for ONSs, but they aren’t looking to commit to them. In fact, the ones that are looking to settle down are happy to spin 20 yo plates while finding someone they want to LTR. I doubt my husban…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/19 10:47 PM
11

I would recommend waiting to look for a serious relationship until you are out of college. From personal experience, the women I know who met their partners in college (18-22), and are still with them, are just now starting to get engaged in their late 20s. I think I know one couple who got engaged in college, but they are very, very religious. The women I know who met their partners shortly after college (22-25) had much quicker timelines. Most were engaged within a year like myself and have al…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/19 09:07 PM
2

So me and my boyfriend have been together for five years and are starting to spend the majority of our time together. I wondered how this was possible until I realized your 20, which means you’ve been dating since high school. I noticed he is not very masculine and that has disappointed me so much. How is he not masculine? Please provide examples. I just feel like what I have to offer as a partner is not being appreciated, I want to cook everything for him and be at his service but he seems unco…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/19 11:49 AM
2

You should try and find a moisturizer with lactic acid in it. CeraVe and Eucerin both have lotions with lactic acid, but I’ve seen all sorts of different options.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/19 01:39 PM
4

Probably the fact that she doesn’t enjoy getting all dolled up unless it’s spontaneous.
/r/RedPillWomen26/05/19 02:22 PM
2

You have security. You have access to his resources. He doesn’t need to be faithful for you to continue to have access to marital assets.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/19 08:42 PM
1

Why do you care if your partner “stay[s] faithful or committed forever?”
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/19 05:53 PM
1

This doesn't mean you respect him as more than a paycheck, because you don't have to be married to extract money and provisioning from a man, as you well know. Even ignoring common law marriages, paternity law and child support is a huge issue that ignores marriage entirely, except when it benefits the woman. We are child free, so no risk there. I’ve taken steps to ensure I cannot get pregnant, so no accidents. But I'm not going to argue with you further, because I'm not arguing about who you ar…
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/19 05:07 PM
0

Your attitude comes across as, "Because I haven't experienced it, it probably didn't happen". While it may come across that way in an anonymous Internet forum, that certainly not the case. We do have different life experience and mine happens to be as a part of the legal system. While I don’t doubt that you’ve heard those stories, my experience shows, at least in part, that this is not what every single divorce attorney across the US is advising client so. I’ve seen “The Red Pill” and I am activ…
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/19 03:43 PM
1

And I can counter-example with many stories of divorce lawyers and shelters and advocates telling women to lie and say he hit her so he'd have to leave the house and put him on the back foot in divorce and custody proceedings, even though he's never touched her. An attorney had never shared a story of this nature with me, and I do not know of anyone who has given this type of advice.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/19 03:14 PM
0

Correlation, not causation. In my experience, women are more likely to file for divorce because it is necessary to get a temporary custody and support order. Women overall make less than men, and therefore one can infer, and my experience supports this, that women are more likely to need financial assistance to leave the marital home. Additionally, in my experience, women are often hesitant to leave a marriage if they know their husband will use the children against her and prevent her from seei…
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/19 02:20 PM
4

To me, your original post and this comment don’t match up. When I read your OP, it reads like you are chastising and shaming women who believe being a SAHM is risky. You even use ironic punctuation around financial security, which is the written equivalent of rolling your eyes.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 08:51 PM
12

Giving up your career, your "financial security" to build a home and family, to put so much trust into someone else to keep you safe while you do the same in a different way. It's considered risky. I think it is risky, no matter how hard you vet your man. There are plenty of women who are SAHMs into their 40s (or 50s) and their husbands file for divorce to be with a different woman. Even after 20 years of marriage, permanent alimony is no guarantee. More likely, you’re going to get rehabilitativ…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 06:51 PM
0

That’s good. It’s always nice to have one part of the couple who has a stable income and benefits. My husband makes less than I do, but it’s by choice. He’s a lucky duck and could retire today in his early 30s, so he can be pretty choosey about where he works. But, even if he was a SAHH, there’s no disparity in education or social status between us because we both have the same education and earning potential. I also have a SO that understands me and understands the pressure and stress I face in…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 05:41 PM
2

My understanding in talking to current law students is that ‘not seeing my SO for the next 3 years’ in LS isn’t necessarily accurate. You’ll see him, but it will be extremely hard to be present. I’d say 40 hrs is on the low side for 10-15 percenters. Maybe if you only do your academics and no extra currics. Are you planning to do Law review (or a journal)? What about teams like moot and arb? There’s also SBA and groups like the Federalist Society and practice area (business, internat., etc.). Th…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 02:36 PM
4

Work for 2-3 years, This is after law school, where you basically will not see your SO for 3 years. If you want to get into Big Law, you’re going to have to be at least top 10 (15 if you’re lucky), plus extra currics and you will have to be on law review. As a summer assoc. you’ll be expected to work at least 40 hrs a week, plus attend dinners and networking events (which for a lot will be no SOs allowed, plus you’re not married so probs not a good idea to bring a SO). You want to work in Big La…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 11:53 AM
2

I would talk to a derm, because you will want a prescription for Retin-A. There are different types and different strengths, so your derm will evaluate your skin and prescribe the right type for you. I’ve had a different experience with my derm than other commenters. I’m in my mid-20s and use Retin-A as a part of my skin care routine. My derm set me up with a great routine for the “purge” stage, and taught me how to use moisturizers and Vaseline to build up my tolerance and work towards daily us…
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 02:32 PM
5

Not me.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 02:21 AM
1

Where did I say she was a grown woman?
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 02:01 AM
1

44 days ago she had decided to break up with him. Now she wants to have this serious discussion about something that’s bothered her for the entirety of their relationship. This is beyond saving. Next time she needs to vet better, which should include finding a man without female friends.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 01:20 AM
3

Someone else said to never date a man with female friends and I truly just don't believe that's practical advice. There will always be female colleagues, networking connections, co-workers, friends of guy friends, female neighbors, ETC. There is a difference between a friend and an acquaintance. Your colleagues, connections, coworkers, friends of friends, and neighbors are all typically acquaintances. I believe this article does a good job of describing the difference between a friendship and th…
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 12:32 AM
1

Do. Not. Date. Men. With. Female. Friends. There’s your answer. No discussion necessary. The ONLY exception in my book are female friends who happily welcome you into the fold, and befriend you. Even then, don’t date a man who hangs out with other women solo.
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/19 08:57 PM
-6

Where I live, you can drive unattended as early as 14.5 years if you meet certain requirements. In many states she could get married (or is just shy of the age requirement) with parental consent. She could have a child at 15, but she can’t say she doesn’t want children at 15?
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/19 08:53 PM
5

Nothing is wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with a woman who does not want children. Not all women are nurturing. You are fine just the way you are. There are a lot of comments in here that are telling you you’re just 15, and that you’ll inevitably change your mind. Maybe you will, but maybe you won’t. Either option is perfectly fine. I’m in my mid-20s. I was you at 15. I still HATE babies and children. HATE. I have no maternal instincts. I’m not particulatly nurturing. I love my husband a…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/19 07:23 PM
10

I’m very open with anyone who asks that I utilize med spa type services, including injectables. I am not ashamed and I don’t see any benefit in hiding that fact, and I don’t want to give anyone unrealistic expectations by not describing my full regemine. My husband supports my use of med spa services, which I think is the big difference here. He trusts me to make that decision for myself, but appreciates that my goal is prevention and not modification. To stop obsessing, I would recommend focusi…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/19 02:39 PM
2

With around 3/4 divorces being initiated by women. Let me explain to you 3 reasons women are more likely to initiate a divorce: You cannot have a temporary child custody agreement until you have filed for divorce. Up until that time, either spouse is legally allowed to take the children wherever, whenever. This means dad can take the children to rural Russia and keep them away from mom, and there’s legally no issue. As a group, women earn less money than men. Therefore, it is more likely that wo…
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 09:20 AM
2

You seem to not recognize that there are very few qualities that are shared by "all men" and "all women". I’m asking questions to test the theory presented and see how others respond. Questions are useful for more than clarifying your own knowledge.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/19 07:34 PM
1

Are men more justified in their anger than women?
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/19 07:04 PM
1

Is male anger inherently more logical than female anger?
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/19 04:52 PM
2

I would be happy to cite statistics and studies. Would you find that beneficial? Maybe it’s because of your age (18), but the ability to the current atmosphere is new. It was not like this even when I was in high school just a decade ago. From a sociological standpoint, this is not yet a solidified part of American culture.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 06:35 PM
3

Or maybe, it’s because it’s not talked about and it’s considered taboo. While I’ve only share a small sample of the stories I’ve heard, I know dozens more.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 05:33 PM
3

I asked about a lot more than guns. I gave an example of an alternative that is often handed out at educational trainings regarding rape prevention, “rape whistles.” If not guns, or rape whistles, then what? Should all children be taught self defense in school? What about disabled students? Remember, not everyone is able bodied and can physically defend themselves. Should these students be taught verbal tatics to disarm their would be rapist? Can you talk someone out of raping you? If I should b…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 05:16 PM
8

Should we give 8 year olds guns as well? What about “rape whistles” or is that part of rape culture, I’m not sure? What should a 3 year old boy do when his dad’s friend rapes him and then tells him if he “tattles” that he will kill his entire family or be taken away from mommy and daddy? What level of defense is sufficient? If you scream, but no one hears you, then did you fight hard enough? What about if you try to kick and scream and it doesn’t work? Was that enough? What if I was so terrified…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 04:58 PM
6

My friends uncle is still a welcomed member of the family. Her family chose to disown and shun her instead of him. I have a friend from college who was raped by her ex-boyfriend after she ended the relationship with him in-person. She went to the hospital after, had a rape kit done, but the police wouldn’t process it or investigate because she didn’t have any bruises at the intake interview. That ex-boyfriend has a job and no one in the city he lives in now knows about the rape. When my husband’…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 03:38 PM
7

You can’t have it both ways. Rape is rape. It does not matter who the defendant is (if we ever even get to the prosecution stage, which is rare). If rape is sometimes okay, because of who the defendant and/or victim is, then how do we teach little boys and girls that are being raped by their uncle that they did nothing wrong. There’s a comment below that’s already given a broader overview of what rape culture truly is, so I won’t repeat it, but you expressly stated “I don’t believe in rape cultu…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 02:26 PM
20

I don't believe in rape culture - I do think how I carry and present myself publicly matters as a method of prevention. How would you suggest girls and women carry themselves, to prevent being raped and sexually assaulted by family members, close family friends and people in positions of power around them? Personally, I’ve never been raped and would like to ensure I prevent it happening so please let me know. I’d also like to let my friend who was raped by her uncle at age 8 know what she did wr…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/19 01:09 PM
4

I think the issue is what constitutes “bad mouthing TRP” is not well defined.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 11:30 PM
4

I think this [https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/96r918/the_myth_of_the_alpha_female/] is a good example of heavy handed, and unneccessary censorship on behalf of the moderators.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 10:10 PM
20

Out of curiosity; why is TRP more critical and hateful towards RPW and women whereas in RPW if someone makes a comment about TRP or men they'd get downvoted heavily or get negative remarks? Simply put, TRP rules allow for this while RPW rules do not. Participants in the RPW sub are expressly forbidden from insulting an RP user or an RP community. While there is a benefit to this rule, it also means there is little room to discuss TRP theory on this sub, because there’s always the chance that cha…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/19 12:51 PM
20

Being a woman is great! I get to kick ass in my career, I have a wonderful husband who loves me an incredible amount and loves spending time with me, I have fun friends and great hobbies, and I get to wear colorful dresses to work every day. My husband wears white shirts and black dress pants, which seems so boring. But seriously, it sounds like you’re suffering from depression and could benefit from talking to a professional.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/19 07:39 PM
5

The fact that he’s 800+ miles away should have been enough of a red flag to not go through with the “phone date.” Also, what the heck is a “phone date?” Is is somehow different from a phone call?
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/19 05:19 PM
4

It appears these issues were present prior to conceiving the child. I was inquiring to see if both her and her husband wanted children, if the child was conceived in an attempt to save the relationship, and what qualities she saw in her husband prior to having their daughter that made her think he would be a good father. So her answer would have been very helpful to my analysis and advice.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 07:50 PM
5

Why did you have a child with him?
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 05:19 PM
5

My dad's 70 and pretty ill. Me and him talk a lot about what I'm getting and he's suggesting over the summer taking classes about managing money and investing. Hospice care will eat up his savings in a hot minute. While taking classes on finance and investing are a good idea generally, what he should really do is put the money in a trust for you. It’s unfortunate he hasn’t already taken that responsible step for you. I thought according to TRP a woman's in her prime at 18-23? From an SMV standpo…
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 11:44 PM
4

If you’re talking about a line in a will, then no inheritance is guaranteed. It is not yours until your father is dead and buried and his estate is settled. He can spend it, he can invest it (and lose it) or he may need to use it to pay debts such as end of life medical expenses. Do not plan on an inheritance. You’re not in your marriage prime at 18. Everyone I know who was married before 23, married exceptionally low quality men. Most of them are now on their first divorce, and second or third …
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 10:58 PM
4

“Supporting yourself” at 18 is a lot different than supporting a family with children. Where do you plan to meet men that can support a SAHW/SAHM in their 20s?
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 10:33 PM
19

I always wonder where women who want to be SAHW/SAHM expect to meet men if they don’t go to college or have careers before getting married. So, let me ask you, where do you plan to meet a man who can support a SAHM? How are you going to support yourself until then? What do you plan to do in the event your husband leaves you, dies or otherwise is no longer able to provide?
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/19 02:58 AM
2

When is it appropriate to ask a man to commit to only you and not sleep with other women? I asked my husband on the second date. I made it clear that was dating for marriage, and that there would be no relationship progression, and therefore sex, without monogamy. He never had any issue with my request for monogamy. Is there ever a time when it’s appropriate for him to spin plates but still keep him in mind as a possible captain? No. The fact that you mention basic training makes me think he is …
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/19 12:01 PM
9

I’ll reuse a previous comment I made on another thread It irritates me to no end that you believe women were staying at home en mass to raise their children prior to the “modern” era (I’m assuming you’re referring to pre-WWII), because it is simply not true. In reality, this idyllic picture you have in your head of the simple life was limited to securely middle class, white women. Women in the lower classes were already working outside of the homes. Heck, children in the lower classes were worki…
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/19 02:29 AM
2

If most women are unable to make their own choices, and will instead accept whatever society encourages them to do, then what’s next after feminism? Reverting to Victorian era concepts of femininity? Something else? If most women are unable to make their own decisions, and instead just go with the status quo, then how would the new status quo make women happier?
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 10:48 PM
9

As I mentioned before, most people are not strong enough to go against what they view as the status quo. Your statement makes it seems as if there’s no free will. Men and women need to accept responsibility for their own happiness. If they’re too weak willed to take control of their lives, then abolishing the feminist ideology isn’t going to help them.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 09:34 PM
12

From my point of view, some people are just weak willed. In the situations you listed, it seems like the woman’s desire for acceptance outweighed her other desires. In countries where feminism isn’t prevelant, women who would love the opportunity to get an education or who don’t want children often forgo their wishes for fear of being ostracized (at best). So, I guess I’m struggling to see the direct nexus to feminism.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 09:01 PM
0

All I said was different. You’re the one who jumped to the above conclusions.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 08:54 PM
10

Can you provide an example of something a woman is unable to do because of social pressure from feminists? As someone who doesn’t champion feminism, I don’t care about what others think of my own plans, so I can’t think of a time when I was prevented or dissuaded from doing something as a result of feminism.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 08:27 PM
24

If we use the most common definition of oppression, “prolonged cruel or unjust treatment or control,” then no, feminism is not oppressive for women. Feminism has never forced me to act a certain way. I am 100% free to be as feminine as I want. I can be a SAHW if I want. I can have 10 kids if I want. The concept of feminism, or even feminist themselves, cannot stop me from doing those things. Feminism does not control the decisions I make on a daily basis. Now, if you had asked if feminism has po…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/19 06:20 PM
1

I’m willing to give him more time to work things out. I care more about my husband than my job, so I’m not too worried about that.
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 11:34 PM
1

No mental disorder that I know of or that he shows signs of. He works hard during the week, but isn’t as in love with his job as I am with mine. He does help around the house, but the entire time is making comments like “hurry up so we can relax,” or “let’s try and get this done quickly so we can finally relax.” A more tangible example is going to the grocery store. We have to map out our list to make sure we are taking the most efficient route through the aisles and we can’t deviate. If I make …
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 08:56 PM
1

I wish I could simultaneously do everything, so he never had to lift a finger, while also doing nothing with him. Unfortunately, that’s physically impossible. Our marriage does not lack intimacy in any way, shape, or form so I don’t really know where the constant need for my presence comes from. For now, I’ve found a temporary solution in constantly calling in sick to work and taking work from home days to clean and run errands. I’d be happy to use a cleaning service, but again no one is allowed…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 05:37 PM
3

I guess I never viewed it that way. Usually I want to do things like go to the gym, spend time with friends (never at our house, no visitors allowed) or visit family. So, I always saw that as providing him more space and time to relax. Additionally, when I do chores, like clean the kitchen/make supper/laundry/taking care of the pup/general tidying, etc. it is always in another area of the home. He spends much of his time in the lower level of our home where our largest tv and gaming systems are,…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 04:33 PM
2

My husband never once forced the issue or even expressed an opinion. Instead, he simply said he would be honored if I would take his name, but would still marry me and love me all the same if I chose not to. Knowing I had an option, and that there was no pressure, made me feel very loved and secure in our relationship. It was because of his approach that I ultimately decided to take his last name. Personally, I think your approach of all or nothing just sounds terribly ineffective given the circ…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 03:59 PM
3

If anything, it is the exact opposite. My husband has told me multiple times that he can only truly relax if I’m also relaxing. To him that means, if he’s watching basketball, I have to be sitting next to him and watch basketball (and doing nothing else). Unfortunately, that means I have to forgo a lot of other activities I would like to do such as spending time with friends and family, little projects around the house and exercise, so he can adequately recharge his batteries. It gets to me most…
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 03:50 PM
7

My husband and I are the exact opposite. After work, he needs time in his “nothing box.” He’ll watch sports, play video games, or just browse on his phone. In comparison, I like to take care of chores (usually surrounding making supper), play with the dog or take her for a nice brisk walk, or read (I read non-fiction for education, I don’t read for escapism).
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/19 02:23 PM
–

Fascinating Womanhood has several helpful concepts, but many of them don’t translate perfectly to the 21st Century. View it as a toolbox from which you can learn, and not a bible which you must obey.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 11:06 PM
–

I have a successful career and several hobbies, some that I share with my husband and some that I don’t, that I’m very passionate about.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 09:27 PM
–

You can read about some of our daily routines HERE
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 07:00 PM
6

He was very overweight, abused drugs and alcohol, and didn’t have any goals or ambitions. By comparison to my current situation, I think he still lives with his parents and make minimum wage. The whole experience was my fault for being too nice.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/19 11:06 PM
6

In my late teens and early twenties, I dated a guy thats was psychologically manipulative. I was more attractive, more popular, more intelligent and just overall too good to be “dating” someone who was such a loser. In fact, I never intended to date him at all, but was stuck in a “relationship” with him for almost 4 years because every time I would break up with him he would threaten to harm himself or committed suicide. Because I was young, I felt like I had to stick around and be nice to him o…
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/19 10:33 PM
6

You can spin it how ever you need to feel better, but the result is the same. You are in a relationship with a man who is unable to leave and cleave. Full stop.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/19 05:48 PM
4

When I was in a similar situation, I left the relationship and found someone who didn’t need mommy 24/7/365. I take the concept of leaving and cleaving very seriously, and was not going to accept a man that wasn’t going to follow through.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/19 04:13 PM
6

There are few flags redder than being a mama’s boy.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/19 03:00 PM
3

Could you please provide some value with this post by summarizing your video? Without the additional content, this is just clickbait.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/19 04:39 PM
10

Here’s a good gift idea for the future, I would ask him if he would be okay turning the shirts into a quilt. My husband has a lot of shirts from different sports teams he was on, and some of them had gotten to the point of no return, but the logo part was still good. We cut out the logos and found a store that could turn them into a t shirt quilt. Now he has those memories forever, but the shirts are safe and they don’t take up as much room.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/19 03:16 PM
16

There is a phenomenon called 'Pre-ejaculation ass kissing' (PEAK), where a highly aroused and sexually frustrated man will do anything for sex. Some men, those without abundance mentality, will often do anything for sex. This includes lying to you about their level of commitment. What worked for me was openly and directly stating that I wouldn’t have sex before demonstrated monogamy. My now husband demonstraged monogamy by making it clear that I was a priority. He went out of his way to do a cou…
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/19 12:03 PM
2

Graduate school
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 11:12 PM
5

Different strokes for different folks.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 12:22 AM
8

I’m introverted, and enjoy time to myself, but that doesn’t mean I have to be boring. I can spend a whole day by myself trying to bake the perfect batch of croissants, reading a book and practicing wing tipped liner, but that still helps make me a fascinating person. But, I also don’t typically struggle to do things outside of my comfort zone (just don’t ask me to go skydiving or get a tattoo, because no thanks).
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 07:47 PM
19

I made sure I was fun and fascinating to be around. I can go out and rage all night or I can stay home and read a book while drinking tea. I feel comfortable in all those spaces. I was my own version of a renisance man. I can talk about politics, sports, philosophy, religion and pop culture with ease. I’m well read and I put time into my hobbies like cooking and baking, DIY projects, fashion and sports. Personally, I would find it hard to be boring.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 07:19 PM
1

I would also add that most people are attracted to other people who look like them, and therefore that look like their parents.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 07:16 PM
9

I guess maybe we spend time around very different men. The men I knew at 23-25 didn’t want serious relationships because they didn’t know where they were going to be after law school, med school, pharm school or their first couple of years in finance. They wanted to be able to take whatever opportunities life presented them, without having to worry about the impact it would have on a wife and children. Do not discount the impact the first 5 years in a career will have on the trajectory of your l…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 05:11 PM
23

I know very few high value men who were in serious relationships at 25. Instead, they were focusing on their careers and becoming independent adults. Typically, men aren’t ready for marriage until they feel that can support a family, and most men don’t get there until 28-35. Personally, I would ask myself what was wrong with a 20 year old guy who was eager to enter into marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:32 PM
11

there's a lot to be said for missing out on the kind of passionate puppy love that happens in ones youth, for never being the fun wild girlfriend he partied with till the morning Not all guys turn into grandpas after their 25th birthday. My husband is more than a couple years older than I am, and we’ve partied quite a bit together. Now if you’re 20 and dating someone who is 60, then that may be different, but people still party and have fun as they get older. Can you define what you mean by olde…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 02:43 PM
3

A married man proves that he's not a creep or sex offender or criminal; a married man shows that he's worth passing on his genetics. Good in theory, not super accurate in practice. Maybe it would read better if you replaced proves with signals.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 01:23 PM
5

I think you meant mortals, not immortals.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 01:21 PM
1

Stay. In. Your. Own. Lane.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 12:37 AM
4

At home, I curse all the time, but so does my husband. We think it’s funny to come up with creative ways of cursing. I do not curse at my husband, but I’ll often ask him “What the fuck are you doing?” because, well, he tends to do strange or eccentric things. Usually he’ll explain and then we will have a good laugh. At work, I curse very rarely. Sometimes, when someone brings in a real whopper or I’ve dealt with a particularly difficult person I’ll curse, but as a rule I try to avoid it.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 07:07 PM
25

Personally, I think it’s incredibly important to live with just your husband after marriage. You cannot pair bond, and build your physical and emotional connection, while living with others. Sex is incredibly important to a new marriage and living with others will stifle that to the marriage’s detriment. But, I realize different cultures view marriage and family differently, so this is just my take. My MIL often stays with us for extended periods of time. She has her own bedroom and living space…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 03:41 PM
–

You can find it here!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 11:55 PM
–

If you make a double batch, Shepard’s pie freezes really well for up to 3 months.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 04:36 PM
–

I’m lucky that I have a husband who needs to eat a lot!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 04:24 PM
–

I love stir fry! We have it a couple of times a month when we need to eat produce and meat that are on their last leg. Whatever meat you use, use stock or broth of the same variety to boil your rice or noodles in. I usually do a 50/50 with water. It will really punch up the flavor.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 04:19 PM
–

Putting time into meal prep pays huge dividends!
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 04:03 PM
–

Monday: Grilled kielbasa with roasted onions, peppers and sweet potatoes. I’ll serve it with a homemade bbq sauce and homemade bread to sop up all the yummy juices. If I’m feeling up to it, I’ll also make a batch of chocolate chunk cookies to have around for the week. Tuesday: Sweet and Spicy Pineapple Chicken served over white rice. Wednesday: Leftover, because Tuesdays recipe gets so much better each day Thursday: Lasagna with salad and homemade garlic knots Friday: Leftover Lasagna. I always …
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 03:21 PM
2

It is simple, no sex before monogamy. My husband was happy to be monogamous rather quickly, but until you’ve discussed monogamy, I would not recommend going too far past the kissing stage. Could a man promise monogamy, have sex with you and dump you the next day? Yes, so this is where you need to have good character judging skills.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 11:42 AM
2

Worked great for me. If he asked me to text or call, I would, but I never initiated first until 6 or so months in. My husband’s a very introverted guy, and I new he would reach out if he wanted to talk or hangout. No regrets.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/19 02:00 AM
6

Do not text first; let him come to you. I didn’t text my husband first until after we started living together. He actually had to ask me to initiate conversations, because I’d wait until we got home to ask small questions I could’ve texted through the day. Let him suggest date ideas, but don’t be afraid to give suggestions if he asks. Don’t spend time near a bedroom, unless you’re ready to have sex. If you’re not ready to progress physically, then hangout places where that would be inappropriate…
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 11:31 PM
13

The way the law and company sexual harassment policies are written, he was the one in violation. The fact that you can’t understand that, shows me that you deserved that ban.
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 01:39 PM
16

She was a victim of sexual harassment in the workplace. Talking about a coworker’s sex life is a classic example of sexual harassment.
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 01:22 PM
12

Where do you want to live after law school? That’s where your main focus should be. This will make it easier to get into a clerking position that will turn into a job offer. Otherwise, you will be spending every single summer away from your husband working. It’s most important to go to a school that has a large alumni network in the area you want to be after you graduate. If for example, you want to live in Salt Lake City, Utah after graduation, sure Michigan is a great law school, but BYU kids …
/r/RedPillWomen24/03/19 01:04 PM
6

I would talk with a vet at length before getting a pet. I’ve had this discussion with many in the veterinary world, and no one recommends having a 100% outdoor dog. Dogs are social, pack animals and need a lot of interaction and stimulation. We take our to play dates three times a week, and for nice long walks on off days. Dogs who have little interaction and spend most of their lives in isolation, chained up outside, will exhibit behavioral problems (at no fault of their own) and will not live …
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/19 07:02 PM
10

Personally, I’m of the mind that you shouldn’t get a pet if they aren’t going to be part of the family, which means living inside. From a cane corso to pit bulls to a corgi, they were all inside dogs. But, we also take being pet guardians extremely seriously and place it on the same level as parenthood.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/19 05:27 PM
52

Personally, I wouldn’t date a man who was casual friends with strippers.
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/19 06:24 PM
1

I would like to echo /u/Zegikni ‘s comment. I am all for giving women tough love if they come to this forum seeking advice, but I feel like what this thread is doing is mocking and shaming women who are not present to respond. I do not condone this behavior and do not see how it advances the goals of this community. I would request this thread be removed.
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/19 05:27 PM
6

Freezer meals. I can make 14+ meals (6-8 servings each) in 2-3 hours on a Saturday why my husband does other chores and entertains the pup. For us, that means we have 2-3 months worth of dinners ready to go. They are all meals that can be thawed over night and stuck in the oven for about an hour or in the crock pot on low while we are at work. I specifically try to pick meals that taste even better leftover, so we can get 2 dinner and 2 lunches out of each meal. We both work, but this allows me …
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/19 05:17 PM
2

First, take some time for self care, even if it’s radical self care. If that means no cleaning for a week or two weeks, so be it. Being happy and preventing resentment from building is more important than a tidy house. This could also mean eating cereal or bologna sandwiches for dinner for the foreseeable future. If you physically and mentally cannot do it anymore, then you simply can’t and that’s okay. Second, take your husband your problem. Tell him that you’re feeling overwhelmed and on the v…
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/19 01:30 PM
7

The other thing I wanted to note is that, although I know it sounds stupid, but all the women around me that are mature are incredibly boring. They don't seem to have any youth in them, they don't smile or act coy or flirt with their men. They seem stiff and stifled. You only see one side of their lives, their public facing persona. You don’t know how these women act at home when no one is around. My husband and I don’t act over affectionate and lovey dovey in public because we are very private …
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 02:19 PM
12

Men don't want competition. Do you think a male lawyer is going to want to come home to a combative, top female lawyer, or instead one that is feminine? Take note that most female lawyers drop out of their careers in their 30's because they get married to male lawyers. Two things I want to point out. First, being successful in your career, attorney or not, does not mean that a woman is overly masculine or has masculine qualities. Additionally, it is 100% possible to be assertive and in control a…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 08:09 PM
3

Proximity likely plays a part, because it is key to the viability of any relationship. But, the men who came into graduate school are married or in LTRs were living with their SOs and still spending the majority of their time with their SOs, so seemingly there was something more at play. Most men I know are married to women with similar educational backgrounds. Most men I know that have post-graduate degrees (MD, DO, Pharm, JD, MBA, etc.) are also married to women with post graduate degrees. The…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 08:02 PM
5

Something I don’t think is talked about enough on this sub is putting yourself in a position to meet high value men. I met my husband in graduate school. There were high value men everywhere in the graduate school programs at my University, and they were partnering up left and right with female graduate students. Not only that, but those men that came into graduate school married or already coupled up were divorcing and breaking up with their SOs to pair up with other graduate students. Out of m…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 05:36 PM
5

I wasn’t trying to discount OP’s comments, so I think you missed my point. My fertility doesn’t define my worth and my value because I’m committed to being child free, and I was only interested in men who did not want children. Childfree women still benefit from being and looking youthful while in the market for marriage, but I wasn’t desperate to find a husband by 25 to take advantage of my fertile years. Second, fertility is a perceived characteristic. I do not know a single couple that underw…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 11:10 AM
18

And the much bigger deal is the fertility time line associated with your age. Not having your worth defined by your fertility, is a very freeing feeling. Unless you have fertility testing done before you get married, you don’t really know what you’re in for. Two of the healthiest, fittest, most youthful looking women I know are totally infertile and looking into adoption in their mid-20s. I think a more reasonable goal is to try and be the top tier in your agre group.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 02:37 AM
15

I wear dresses/tunic/skirts with tights or leggings. I wear a lot of turtlenecks, sweaters and cardigans. Personally, I think it’s the fit that matters. I feel ultra feminine in fleece lined tights, a skirt and a fitted turtle neck with little pointy toed flats.
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 01:57 PM
3

Manage the Money This includes paying monthly utilities, bills, mortgages, car payments, insurances, etc. It also includes taxes, (it’s that time of year!), or any fees for accounting professionals who may assist you. He should also plan and budget for major expenses and planning such as furniture, appliances, and other items not within the regular budget. If he manages money well and accumulates savings, he may save or invest at his discretion. The act of paying bills is no longer as complicate…
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/19 11:36 PM
21

Most likely, this will not get any better. I dated someone similar when I was in my late teens. He would spend thousands of dollars on new technology, games, clothes, shoes, etc., but when ever we would do an activity it was always “Well, I don’t like to go anywhere, so this was your idea. If it is your idea, then you have to pay.” Best thing I ever did was break up with him. It was difficult, because he would threaten suicide any time I tried. Eventually, I just started dating again even though…
/r/RedPillWomen06/03/19 07:42 PM
5

My husband and I don’t use social media, which is likely why I don’t have this issue. Not using social media actually served me super well when I was dating. Every guy I dated saw it as a positive quality.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 09:05 PM
4

I literally do not know what any of my husband’s past girlfriends or sexual partners look like. Are you cyberstalking these women?
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/19 08:53 PM
53

Can you imagine how horrible he would be as a father? A husband? This behavior shows that if something is an inconvenience to him, he will stop caring about it. Just imagine what would happen if you lived together. Would he “rehome” you to the park the first time you were sick? If I were you, I would have immediately terminated the relationship after receiving those texts.
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/19 06:41 PM
3

”A man has an inborn need to feel needed as a provider, to feel that his wife depends on him for financial support and can't get by without him. In addition, he has an inborn need to excel women as a provider. A man’s feeling of worth can be undermined when he see's women in the workforce doing a better job than he.” Not every man feels this pressure, but more than that, not every man wants this pressure and responsibility. Instead, they want to be defined by how they make their life, not how th…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/19 07:56 PM
6

The female sexual imperative is usually described as getting married to an alpha/high beta man to protect and provide for you and your children. First, you should take comfort in the fact that there have always been women who either could not have children or did not want children. Unfortunately for some of those women, they were either forced to bare children they did not want or were cast out from marriage when it was discovered that they could not produce progeny. My husband and I are child f…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/19 01:08 PM
5

I feel like we’ve mirrored this pattern on a couple of posts. I’m glad someone else gets it!
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 12:49 AM
9

It irritates me to no end that you believe women were staying at home en mass to raise their children prior to the “modern” era (I’m assuming you’re referring to pre-WWII), because it is simply not true. In reality, this idyllic picture you have in your head of the simple life was limited to securely middle class, white women. Women in the lower classes were already working outside of the homes. Heck, children in the lower classes were working outside of the homes. In fact, this has never been t…
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/19 11:54 PM
39

Yikes! It sounds like you don’t know how to stand on your own two feet and be an independent adult. You jumped out of one relationship (sounds like you were an emotional cheater) and right on into the next one without any time for self reflection or personal growth. Now, less than a year in you’re going to move in with a guy you aren’t 100% happy with. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. If I were you, I would continue living on my own until I felt more confident and sure in myself. I would not m…
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 01:40 AM
2

Sandwiches I would also to preemptively pack him dinner and send it to work every day. If he doesn’t eat it, it becomes the next day’s lunch. There’s no need for him to wait until 10 to eat. Or, he could always order take out to the office for dinner. Usually, if there’s a group working late, that’s why my office does.
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 01:51 PM
3

I don't think they should feel the need to change it just because some study said men think brunettes are better to marry. Study? More like a one time polling of men by a UK hair care company. Who knows how the questions were worded or what the selection criteria was for participation.
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 05:46 PM
4

Yes, it says I like floral button ups. Maybe my husband (and the other men I dated prior to meeting my husband) all miraculously happen to be the exception to the rule, but my understanding of men is they do not think like this. I think that’s the sole point of contention here, and clearly we simply have a difference of opinion on how much of an impact your suggestions would have in securing a second date and subsequently commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 04:19 PM
6

No one has ever questioned my chastity or perceived me as “naughty” because I tend to dress in all black. In fact, I think it helps support the ultra conservative, Puritan-esque vibe I’m trying to convey. Again, as long as you look comfortable and put together, men are not going to pay much attention to what you’re wearing.
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 03:59 PM
7

Personally, I don’t think the color of your top or dress makes a difference. I’m an all black everything kind of woman, and I don’t think it’s genuine to try and alter that for a first date.
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 03:24 PM
17

On my first date with my now husband, I wore jeans (black), a flannel shirt (black and gray) with a high cut long sleeved shirt (black) underneath and riding boots (black leather). My hair was cut in a bob above my shoulders, because I have naturally fine hair that looks best when short. I was probably wearing light makeup, with red lip tint. Wear something comfortable that you feel confident in, and make sure it’s appropriate for the situation. For example, don’t wear 4” heels to go see a baseb…
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 03:12 PM
3

From my personal experience, it’s why a lot of people avoid divorce. All of the questions below are about what others think of you, and I’m sure the answer to those questions has caused many to delay or not file for divorce. What will my kids think? Will everyone think I’m a failure? What will God think of me, and what does this mean for my salvation? Whose side will our friends take? Will I have a support system if I get divorced, or will my family look down upon me and cast me out? Will I ever…
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/19 11:37 AM
14

First, I would like to state that it is clear from the research in this area that there is a correlation between cohabitation prior to marriage and divorce. But, because there is a correlations between dozens of different factors and divorce, I don't think anyone should believe that cohabitation prior to marriage automatically means that the marriage will end in divorce. ​ Second, I believe the theory that couples who have relaxed views towards cohabitation will also have more relaxed views towa…
/r/RedPillWomen18/02/19 04:52 PM
2

Who is this a tradition for?
/r/RedPillWomen16/02/19 02:45 PM
2

Are their husbands happy too? If their SMV is still compatible with their husband’s, then that would work. Personally, I don’t know any overweight women who are married to high SMV/RMV guys.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 04:04 PM
27

Don’t be fat. Ever.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 01:47 AM
11

No. I don’t have time to worry about the love lives (or lack there of) of others. If a friend asks for advice, I give them my honest opinion. If they don’t like it or accept it, that’s their issue and not mine. Maybe look into finding a new hobby. Knitting, coloring, painting, yoga are all good relaxing ideas.
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/19 06:18 PM
1

To me at least, spending money =/= love, and gifts usually cost money. To steal from this post, “A woman is well served if she chooses the man who needs her the least. The man who gives her Skittles, not Tiffany’s jewelry.” I would argue that having gifts as your top love language is a fast track to betadom for your SO.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 08:28 PM
16

Did you ask for his help with the snowblower? Or just label him as worthless? You could have asked for help in a feminine way: “Hey honey, can you help me do the driveway? I can show you how to use the snowblower if you’ve never run one before. It’s hard for me to push, but you’re so big and strong I know it will be easy for you!” For the other tasks that you would like help with, simply ask for help. “Hey I noticed a bald spot out in the yard when I was playing with the dogs. Can you take a loo…
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 06:58 PM
0

Your first and second sentence directly contradict each other.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 05:30 PM
1

No, but it is a male dominated field that requires education beyond a bachelors.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 04:20 PM
2

What is everyone’s opinion on gifts being a love language? To me it seems artificial and was simply included to address women who “would just feel so much more loved if he bought me flowers every once in a while.” For me, you cannot buy love, and this flies directly in the face of that sentiment.
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 04:16 PM
8

First, if it is important to your husband to make more than you, there is nothing stopping him. My husband is more risk adverse (for everything, but definetly for finances). So, what we do is save 100% of his take home pay. He feels a strong responsibility for our future, so knowing that he’s in charge of planning for retirement is a big motivator for him. Because we practice FIRE, this also gives my husband a lot of flexibility. He doesn’t have to work at all if he doesn’t want to, because we’v…
/r/RedPillWomen08/02/19 04:12 PM
5

How do I maintain my values by not having sex while still attracting a guy my age (in college)? Most men your age are not looking for committed relationships. If you’re looking exclusively on your campus, you’ll probably have better luck with graduate students.
/r/RedPillWomen07/02/19 12:24 PM
21

Is there any chance he was unfaithful during this time period? Have any of his behaviors led you to believe he is using porn? He seems to feel guilty about something, and I don’t think it’s outrageous to consider infidelity. It would explain why he wouldn’t have sex with you while pregnant (risk of passing std to baby) and why he isn’t interested in sex now (feels guilty for cheating on the mother of his child). If you don’t have any doubts, then completely forget about this comment! Also, men c…
/r/RedPillWomen06/02/19 08:23 PM
2

Sounds like you and your SO disagree on that one, since he is still getting his milk for free.
/r/RedPillWomen05/02/19 07:25 PM
-5

Valentine’s Day is a fake holiday. We don’t even recognize it’s existence outside of making fun of men who get conned into buying something for their undeserving wives.
/r/RedPillWomen05/02/19 02:44 PM
7

If he wants to swap out the center stone for something larger, you could repurpose the current center stone into a necklace! It’s possible he always wanted you to have a ring that looked a certain way, but just wasn’t able to afford it until now. My husband’s happiness will always mean more to me than my wedding ring.
/r/RedPillWives04/02/19 07:28 PM
2

It’s no secret that our analysis is dependent on how a commentor frames their remarks. We can only see the subjective and not the objective, because we don’t have the opportunity to observe the home life of anyone on this sub. In a relationship, each partner completes tasks that have a high value to them individually, but on the surface have little value to the other partner. For example, the time I spend reading leisure material does not directly benefit my husband and he may view that as an ac…
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 06:08 PM
4

Women, particularly lower class and minority women, were in the workforce well before the 20th Century, and they certainly didn’t demand it. Not all women who are high earners need partners who out earn them. In fact, just like couples where the man out earners the woman, this creates the opportunity for the lower earning spouse to take more risks and pursue their passion to a greater degree than they would if the weight of supporting the entire household was on them.
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 05:13 PM
1

Can you elaborate on why you think it is unfortunate?
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 02:12 PM
2

As the OP, who is in that exact situation, I’d be interested in that as well. He never contemplates that situation in his responses.
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 02:09 AM
6

Yes, I do work. Full-time (40-60 hrs/week), outside of the home with the occasional opportunity to work from home. High stress, but also high reward. I currently bring home more than my husband, but our finances are complex. He also currently works full time at least 40 hours a week, but most days has more flexibility than I do. No. We divy chores up based on who had the higher expectation and skill set. I make all the shopping lists, maintain the kitchen and do all of the cooking. I also try to…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 09:47 PM
6

I know at least two family friends where the parents were great parents and one of the kids murdered the parent(s). I also know of great families where the kids end up addicted to drugs and rob from the parents and put the parents in grave danger when dealers figure out where they live. These parents spent countless hours and dollars trying to help and rehabilitate their kids, but it wasn’t enough. Sometimes it just isn’t enough. In 2019, there is no reason to have children in the industrialized…
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/19 10:27 PM
5

Having children is a gamble. Your kids could murder you, your kids could rob you, your kids could hate you, your kids could all die before you. They could also be wonderful kids, or most likely, somewhere in between. Having kids doesn’t guarantee anything, including that you get to pass along your values or have family in old age. If you’re having kids because you hope it will make you happy or fulfilled or less lonely, then you’re not ready to have kids.
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/19 10:05 PM
11

Having children does not guarantee that you won’t finish your last years alone in a nursing home. Ask someone who works in a nursing home. Families visiting is a rarity for most residents, the majority of which have children.
/r/RedPillWomen01/02/19 09:32 PM
5

My husband said it first. I had felt that way for about a month, but I think it’s incredibly important to let the man go first. For me, it’s the only to know if he truly means it and said it freely. He said it right around the 4 month mark.
/r/RedPillWomen26/01/19 08:45 PM
2

To be clear, is your argument that taxpayers do not bear the responsibility of paying for war and the military?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 09:08 PM
2

Is it your argument that the sole power granted to the president by the US Constitution is to serve as the commander and chief of the military? Edit to Add: Additionally, is it your argument that the only power granted to Congress in the US Constitution is that of taxing and spending?
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 06:48 PM
5

I’m interested in your opinion on who should be allowed to vote. Only those who are eligible for the draft? Only those who meet the requirements to serve in infantry divisions? How does this change with the decrease in the “boots on the ground” approach and the military’s greater reliance on technology? If women were required to sign up for the draft, should they be allowed to vote? Should they be eligible or required to serve in infantry positions? If a man or woman is deferred from the draft d…
/r/RedPillWomen25/01/19 04:13 PM
4

I think she should consider why she wants to set a boundary here, instead of discontinuing the relationship. What first attracts men is appearance, but what causes a man to commit to a woman varies greatly depending on the man. For some men, that will include a woman’s career and social standing. If he doesn’t respect her enough not to hurl insults at her after she has asked him to stop, then he is not the right person for her.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/19 07:13 PM
13

Men who want to be in committed relationships leading to marriage do not act like this. The way you speak about him shows that you need to keep up with no contact and move on.
/r/RedPillWomen24/01/19 04:54 PM
3

I would ask your derm, plastic surgeon or nurse injector this question. I got a much different answer than /u/PrincessKek is sharing when I did.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/19 08:45 PM
-1

My husband loves to brag about how helpful and committed to our team mission I am. I was the only woman in our little community out at 5:00 am clearing snow with their husband, so you weren’t alone I’m sleeping in.
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/19 04:32 PM
-4

He got home at 3 a.m. a few nights ago and I woke up to the sound of him shoveling and salting our walkway. I can’t imagine not being out there right alongside my husband!
/r/RedPillWomen23/01/19 12:45 PM
3

If you go to an injector who is good at what they do and well versed in preventative Botox, then it won’t be an issue. Not all dermatologists are great with injectibles. I would consider a plastic surgeon’s office and don’t be afraid to go to a nurse injector. You want someone who does this for a big part of their job. I go to a cosmetic dermatologist, which seems to be a growing area. I would be wary of injectors who don’t recommend just starting with microunits limited to the forehead. If you …
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/19 08:45 PM
3

So, if men are more interested in doing something, then that makes something masculine? Can that evolve over time? If interest is split 50/50 is it just a neutral trait? How is planning for retirement masculine or feminine? Is my husband feminine if he chooses to wash the dishes, because more often that’s women’s work? Or is it masculine because he’s a man and I find it incredibly sexy when he washes the dishes?
/r/RedPillWomen19/01/19 04:33 AM
2

Is a masculine quality simply a quality that a specific man has? I’m struggling to see what about qualities 1–5, 10-11, 13-15, 17-21, 23-27 and 29-30 have to do with masculinity, because they are qualities that are not related to sex or gender. If we are going to list masculine traits and celebrate them, it would be nice to know what can go on the list.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/19 08:48 PM
14

Personally, I wouldn’t make life altering plans with a man until we were engaged. Sounds like he’s life plans are currently very flexible, while yours are more set in stone due to your chosen profession. I would continue down that path until such time you actually know where you are relocating to and when.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/19 04:50 PM
–

12 hours a day? Not only is that unproductive and unnecessary, I believe the review programs expressly tell you not to study that much. The people I know who did the best still worked out, took care of themselves, spent time with friends, and some of them even worked 10-20 hours a week. If he’s working 8-10 hour days since he’s already in practice, that’s plenty of time to do 6-7 hours of studying, a workout, a chore or two and still have dinner on the table when he gets home. Make a schedule an…
/r/RedPillWomen16/01/19 12:40 PM
1

I don’t think there’s any chance of the guy paying 100% for anything. If she thinks there is, then she can consider leaving that part out.
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/19 09:10 PM
1

I would tell him the truth. “When we made plans to go out of town, I was under the impression that the trip was your gift to me. I cannot afford my half of the trip. Is there something else we could do that is less expensive? My budget is $X.” Going forward, I would be wary of his constant need to go Dutch. It may indicate that he would like at your finances as his income vs. your income, instead of having an our income mentality.
/r/RedPillWomen15/01/19 07:19 PM
6

So, while he may still legally be your husband, he is not functionally your husband anymore. There’s no need to address this with him. Work with your attorney to determine who is remaining in the marital home. If it’s not you, then it’s time to find an apartment and start the healing process.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 05:57 PM
18

I’m not sure why you think you need to defer to his opinion. You don’t have to agree with his every view point. Additionally, the goal of a civil debate is not to get someone to change their stance on a given topic. Instead, it’s an opportunity to challenge each other and learn to better articulate your stance on the topic. It’s a brain exercise, there are no winners or losers and no clear right and wrong. If you are unable to have these types of mature debates, then simply don’t discuss the top…
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 04:56 PM
1

There’s no perfect friend, which is why it’s important to have a friend group where each person has different interests and personality traits. I’ve had friends move away or become so busy we barely see each other over the years, but I’ve been able to adapt and remain friends because I’m not wholly dependent on one person for friendship. This why I’ve always had multiple “best friends.” I think what you’re trying to convey is that women shouldn’t put all their eggs in one basket and be conscious…
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 03:34 PM
30

I know that he likes me and that he cares. Why would he treat you like this if either of these things were true? He does not like you and he does not care. after all this time he doesn't feel that I deserve some final words, some goodbye... Why do you deserve anything from this guy? This is a huge covert contract. Accept his actions as his final last words, and work harder to vet next time.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 02:12 PM
5

Can we get more information? I believe the following is required per sub rules: If you are asking a personal relationship question, please answer the following questions: What is the problem, and what do you think is the root of the issue? How have you contributed/attempted to mitigate the problem? What is your current relationship status and length of time? Be honest with yourself about what background is needed to help the community answer your question. Withholding information doesn't make it…
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 01:44 PM
88

The phrase “actions speak louder than words” comes to mind. But I love him so much. He no longer loves you. I just want him to say something, even if he breaks up. His actions are the same as a break up. I just want to understand what is going on. Why did he suddenly start to ignore me. He’s broken up with you and does not wish to speak with you. He’s probably even blocked you so he doesn’t have to put up with your barrage of texts and calls. There have been already some long periods where he st…
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 01:29 PM
4

Because if you are vetting and you’ve become so attached that he is your best friend, a break up means losing both your boyfriend and the future you see with him and losing your best friend, your social outlet and your emotional support. I think that may be why I struggle to identify with this quote. I have 6-7 people I would consider best friends, and they span several friend groups. I’d probably lose some friends if my husband and I divorced, but I don’t think any of my best friends.
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 12:58 AM
11

Do most women only have one best friend? I’ve always used that term to describe multiple people at once (and I know my best friends have multiple best friends, etc.), but maybe that’s a regional thing or something.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 11:42 PM
11

There is some much that plays into this decision, including: - The age parents were married, and if they are still together - Level of education - Socio-Economic Status - Race, ethnicity and national origin - Religion - Desire to have children And that’s only the top 5 I can list. Ultimately, the right age to get married is when you’re ready, with the understanding that a desire to have children puts women on a tight timeframe. I got married in my mid-20s. I also have a very high level of educat…
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 11:47 PM
44

Leaving is always an option. He does actually sound like a nasty man from your post. Being in a relationship with some one does not automatically mean they are your captain. Specifically, a BF is not necessarily a Captain during the vetting stages. From my experience, this is not normal behavior for a man. While my husband may have preferences, he’s never compared me to another woman. Why? Because he understands that isn’t healthy. I can’t suddenly become tan, my skin tone is my skin tone. Tanni…
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/19 12:24 PM
11

You don’t have to do everything Laura Doyle recommends in order to see improvement. My husband and I make financial decisions together and I’m responsible for “managing the finances” (not much to manage when everything is on autopay to one credit card and the credit card is automatically paid too). That system works for us. My husband doesn’t like what he calls “administrative chores” and I enjoy them, so it would be absurd to force him to “manage the finances” becaue Laura Doyle says so, especi…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 11:04 PM
13

The goal of being a housewife and having a career, if that career is in writing, aren't wholly incompatible. You can still write or blog while being a SAHW or SAHM. Additionally, women can have high powered careers and still be submissive to their husbands. It Regardless of how you were raised, you're an adult now and you choose how you act. It was your conscious decision to alter your body with tattoos and piercing and continually choose to smoke and drink. Piercings can be removed, tattoos can…
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 09:31 PM
15

If I were in your situation, I would a) tell the employer in the new city that my life circumstances had changed and I was no longer available to move, or b) move to the new city and live alone. I wasn’t going to break up with my husband if he didn’t propose within the year, but I wasn’t going to give him the benefits of a wife without being a wife any longer than necessary. In my case, I already knew a proposal was coming and that we would want to live together in less than 12 months, which is …
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 06:40 PM
46

I wouldn’t have made a single plan for the move, including looking for a job. You set a boundary and didn’t enforce it. How is your bf supposed to respect your boundaries when you don’t? When I moved in with my now husband, I told him he had one year to propose or I was moving back out on my own. He knew I was dead serious. He happily proposed less than 5 months later. I would not under any circumstance buy a house with a man I was not married to, and I wouldn’t sign a lease with one either. Is …
/r/RedPillWomen07/01/19 03:52 PM
2

Your representation of life as an ED doctor is very different from what I’ve heard from a current ED doctor. I know residency was hell and it seems like very few of the female residence are in stable relationships with even fewer married. PAs can also have a role in the ED, depending on state law.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 11:39 PM
20

I wouldn’t even consider this elective plastic surgery. It’s like when some people break their nose and after it heals end up having to have it corrected and straightened out. I wouldn’t be evasive when people ask if you had a procedure done. Just say you suffered an injury as a child and were finally able to have it fixed.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 10:10 PM
5

What area of medicine were you hoping to practice in? I only have one friend who went to through a MD program. She is 28, still in residency and single. I have other friends who did PA, ARNP and chiropractic programs. They are all married and I believe two already have their first child. They seem to have a lot of flexibility with their schedules, and really enjoy their jobs. I only know one girls salary, but right out of PA school she was making $130,000/yr is a rural part of the country. In my…
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 09:56 PM
1

If you need more help around the house, I would stick to asking for help with chores that need done immediately. Help drying the dishes, help folding and putting away laundry, help changing a light bulb as soon as you notice it’s out, etc. Also, are there video games you can play together. My husband loves to game, but what he loves even more is when we play together.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 03:22 AM
1

Do women have healthy children after age 35? Yes they do. Is the risk of complication higher? Yes it is, particularly for women having their first child after 35. You don’t know how long it will take you to conceive or even if you’ll be able to conceive naturally at 26. That will be more difficult in 10-15, because your fertility is already declining.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:55 AM
1

I would stick to working on through this issue with your therapist. Seeking advice from Internet strangers will only lead to comparing yourself to people you know nothing about and potentially cause additional harm. Maybe you and your BF can attend sessions together and talk through this issue with the benefit of your therapist as an impartial third party.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:34 AM
1

If you are going to have children, you’re doing a real disservice to them by starting at age 36-40. Right now though, what you need is some serious therapy to learn how to love yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:24 AM
2

If a woman loves her husband and is attracted to him, that love and attraction should inspire her to look her best. Women respond to dread, and yes some of that dread results from a fear of losing the resources her husband provides. Her husband is entering his prime right now (mid-30s to mid-50s) and knowing that he has options is just reality, not a fear tactic. Men leave their wives when they turn into frumps who care more about being a mom than a wife, and it benefits women to accept that fac…
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:04 AM
-7

Before I respond, I’m curious if you’ve read the sidebar. If you have, how much?
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 10:28 PM
6

Would you rather spend the money or have your husband leave you for a newer, prettier model? The fact that he’s had to specifically mention it to you means he may have already thought about it. I can’t imagine what a disappointment it must be for your husband to work hard every day to come home to a wife he doesn’t feel like he can show off. By not spending the money you are disregarding his wishes and disrespecting him.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 09:28 PM
5

Is there a place in your house where he can play his video games away from you? We have all of our systems set up down in the basement, so if I want to go to bed or work on something DH doesn’t have to worry about being too loud. You work for yourself, at home, so maybe your husband doesn’t understand why he needs to help out. He just thinks you’re at home all day, and it’s no big deal that you do the housework in between work sessions. Have you asked him to do specific tasks? For example, after…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 09:25 PM
17

We also live together, so breaking up is not a viable option and I don’t want to give up on him yet. Why isn’t breaking up a viable option? You are already 22. Not to be alarmist, but you don’t have forever to wait around for this addict to fix himself. And, even if he kicks his addiction there’s always the chance of relapse later in life. Do you want to risk being in your 30s or 40s with a husband who doesn’t want to have sex with you and instead wants to go out building deep connections with o…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 08:27 PM
1

I will keep looking, but I think the quote came from a different book based on interviews with Helen Andelin. I read the two books back to back, so my notes aren’t really clear on exactly where I read it. The other book is Helen Andelin and the Fascinating Womanhood Movement. It provides some very interesting context on how the original FW book was written and helped me decipher what advice is helpful and what is hurtful. Also, very fascinating background on the the author. I would recommend rea…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 07:31 PM
2

I read it in ebook format so my page numbers may not match up, but I’ll try to go back and search for it.
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 05:03 PM
2

I think listing 25 things you like about yourself is overly self indulgent. I would imagine that number was selected because women will be able to provide 10 or 15, but not get to 25. It provides a lightbulb moment where they are supposed to realize they have good qualities, but not nearly enough leaving room for improvement. Personally, I think it would be a better exercise to list the top 5 things you like about yourself and the top 5 things you believe your husband likes about you. If those l…
/r/RedPillWomen05/01/19 03:03 PM
1

Are you planning to use it as the basis for a dating profile? To market yourself to employers? As a tool for keeping in contact with friends and family? The only people I know who cultivate their social media, are those who use it for business branding.
/r/RedPillWomen04/01/19 04:53 PM
2

This is a good solution for women whose SOs wish to celebrate Valentine’s Day. For most women, I would recommend forgetting about Valentine’s Day. Generally, men see it as a gift grab holiday and would prefer not to celebrate it. I’ve never placed importance on February 14th and instead celebrate my love for my husband each and every day, and I know he really appreciates that I don’t place any pressure on him!
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/19 04:40 PM
5

I trust my husband to have reasonable preferences, and I respect them. I don’t worry too much about impressing others, because I don’t have to be married to them.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/19 04:10 PM
3

Women should be dressing according to their husband’s preferences. That may mean wearing a mini skirt and thigh high boots out to go dancing when you’re in your 50s or wearing floor length denim skirts and long sleeved shirts every day in your 20s.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/19 02:36 PM
–

I usually stick to Oribe or R+Co. I’ve heard dry bar is great too, but I haven’t had the chance to try it yet. The best thing to do is spray it in, wait a couple minutes and then round brush it out. Extra volume and it’s removes and kinks.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/19 12:46 AM
–

I would use a commercial product the first time. There are several on the market, but I’ve used CLR in the past with success. After the first round, I would use a spray made up of water, white vinegar, dish soap and lemon essential oil. Spray it in the morning after the last shower and let it sit throughout the day, then rinse before bed. If you need some scrubbing power you can make a paste with baking soda and water.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/19 04:50 PM
–

I use Olaplex No. 3. I shower, wetting my hair but not washing it, brush it out, apply a healthy amount of Olaplex from root to tip, braid my hair and let it soak until bedtime. Then I wash and condition my hair and blow it out with a round brush. I preemptively spray some dry shampoo at the roots so I’m just ready to go in the morning. Have you considered getting a whole home water softener? That will also help with hair and skin.
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/19 04:37 PM
–

I use Olaplex at least once a week. My hair is an inch or so past my shoulders and a bottle lasts me about a month. Dip manicures are 100% the cost. Mine typically last for 3 weeks, but sometimes I’m able to push it to 4. My nails grow very quickly and while the polish still looks great at 3 weeks, the length starts to bug me. Vinegar works the best at our house. Do you have a lot of nickel plating?
/r/RedPillWomen01/01/19 04:15 PM
15

So, just so I’m understanding, your fiancé moved straight from his mother’s home to living with you? Has he ever had to be self sufficient or lived alone? Personally I wouldn’t marry a man who has never been self sufficient. Why? Because I learned an incredible amount about myself in the 6 years where I lived alone or with roommates. I realize that living alone or with roommates while seeking higher education isn’t a universal experience, but I wanted a partner who had had a similar experience. …
/r/RedPillWomen29/12/18 02:25 PM
2

That doesn’t change the fact that your hypergamy has already kicked in and your dissatisfied with this guy. Let him go so he can find a woman who appreciates him for who he is.
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/18 11:15 PM
7

If you’ve only been seeing each other for a short time and you already have a list of things you want to change, then he is not the man for you. Also, why are you on Reddit around him and not giving him your full attention when you’re together? That seems rude.
/r/RedPillWomen27/12/18 10:46 PM
4

Honestly, I kind of pity women who have decided gifts is their love language. But, even more than that I pity their husbands, because that much be a such a burden. I’m thankful that we don’t put pressure on ourselves to get gifts and instead just buy things throughout the year when we want or need them. I would hope that other women could see that the best gift is a loving husband and that material items are not the reason for the season.
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/18 02:29 PM
1

I actually already get SNS manicures! I end up doing them about every three weeks because my nails grow quickly and the length starts to impact my typing speed at about that time. I also don’t like the way they look with too much new growth. I’ve pushed it to four weeks plus a couple days a few times when I couldn’t find the time for an appointment. Most time, I make it a full three weeks without chipping, but I’ve definetly broken and chipped my nails badly enough that I had to get a fresh mani…
/r/RedPillWomen22/12/18 01:23 PM
2

/u/stripethrowaway is correct that we practice FIRE. That’s why I stated to another user that DH’s take home salary and what we save for retirement each year are pretty irrelevant for gathering a picture of our financials. I never advocated for anyone to do everything I do or to spend as much as I choose to spend. Ideally, RPW are finding husbands before 25, so many of these expenditures will be pre-mature. For me, I started taking preventative measures very seriously after turning 25. I didn’t …
/r/RedPillWomen21/12/18 08:35 PM
4

Compatibility it multifaceted. Pure attraction and “love” are not enough to sustain a marriage. The #1 cited reason for divorce is finances, so while money isn’t everything it is very important. I personally didn’t leave marriage up to fate, and instead put myself in a position to meet high value men by seeking the same education and being involved in my community.
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/18 05:56 PM
20

My experience may be different from others, but all of the SAHM's I know have a bachelors degree, and in several cases, a masters or other professional degree. They also had careers prior to having children. Some stopped working after the first child and some stopped working as they had additional children. Based on the girls I knew in HS, the majority of those that went on to marry high value men have a bachelors degree and currently work, but I have just entered the season of life where people…
/r/RedPillWomen19/12/18 12:09 AM
2

I guess my point was that if the consensus is that most high value men do not want to date or marry high maintenance women, that you don’t have to use Mane and Tail for shampoo, conditioner and body wash to be considered low maintenance. If a woman is trying to determine where she falls on the maintenance scale, she should first look at the amount of time spent and then the amount of money. If it’s not digging a hole in a man’s budget, he’s more likely to judge your maintenance level by time spe…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 04:44 PM
2

Well, There’s a difference between retinol and retin-a. Do you know which product the studies you’ve read were based on?
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 04:30 PM
4

I notice a difference, but not a huge difference, between my skin and my peers’ skin. But, that makes sense since I’m in my mid-20s and I’m focusing on prevention. I imagine the difference will grow and will be much more noticeable in my 40s and 50s.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 04:06 PM
2

Generally, I’ve found men look at time more than money when deciding if a woman is high maintenance. From a time perspective, I’m very low maintenance. Thanks to my routine, I can be ready in no time at all. I do end up having a lot of appointments, but I can usually double up and schedule them in a way that matches up with my husband’s schedule. Everyone’s budget is different, but obviously my husband is okay with my routine. So while I allocate a healthy amount in my budget for beauty expenses…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 04:04 PM
8

I think it depends in large part where someone’s priorities are. We eat 95% of our meals at home (in large part because my cooking is better than many restaurants), we aren’t really into “going out,” and typically have friends over to hangout instead, we only take one vacation a year and rely heavy on points and we both use the capsule wardrobe method so our clothing costs are minor each year. Saving in food, entertainment, travel and clothing can really add up and allow freedom in other areas.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 01:55 AM
-4

If that’s all your wife wants to spend, then that’s cool. My husband’s take home pay from his primary job gives you zero insight into our financial status, so yes this does work for us.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 01:44 AM
10

Yep. We plan our yearly budget around my salary.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 01:28 AM
3

At least my husband’s entire take home salary ($40,000) + several pre-tax deductions for both of us ($11,000+). Usually we have leftover from my salary too.
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 01:01 AM
1

This is exactly what I thought as soon as I opened this post. It has no new content, no new perspective, no anecdotes, and no real value for anyone but first time readers. I'm thankful my relationship is not this banal.
/r/RedPillWomen16/12/18 09:23 PM
4

You hate overweight people and puppies?! I’m sure you’ll be a real hit at the office holiday party.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/18 06:02 PM
24

Your mom’s idea sounds incredibly manipulative. He’s invited you along and you’re refusing to go just to prove the point that you don’t recognize his friendship. If you’re bf celebrates his birthday without you, that’s 100% on you.
/r/RedPillWomen07/12/18 11:22 PM
3

Providing is a big part of traditional gender roles and if you have a high earning career, it is highly difficult to stress yourself between the more domestic demands at home and still maintaining that career. Nope. Managing my job and my household duties is incredibly easy. My husband has a fresh, home cooked meal every night, our house is tidy and organized just the way we like it, and we have plenty of time to just chill together each week night and on the weekends. High earning does not auto…
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/18 03:13 PM
10

First, don’t let anyone tell you that you have to be a SAHW, SAHM or low earner to be in a traditional relationship. You can fulfill traditional gender roles at home, while still having a high earning career. Second, I have yet to meet a high value man who would be willing to commit to a woman who wasn’t self sufficient before marriage. Many man I know even look for women who earn the same or more than them, because it can help mitigate the risk of marriage. Give him opportunities to serve you i…
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/18 01:27 PM
3

There is absolutely nothing wrong with BMI 27. I am Happy, my BF is happy with my body. Happy enough to marry you?
/r/RedPillWomen20/11/18 01:28 AM
55

Next! He has no control over his anger, and it will only get worse with time.
/r/RedPillWomen19/11/18 05:44 PM
16

Good men are wising up and shifting over to MGTOW. More like garage men who were never marriage material to begin with.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/18 09:52 PM
2

Agree.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/18 09:43 PM
7

In the way men define “shit test” there is significant overlap between “shit testing” and vetting. Questions like “Do you have a girlfriend?” or “Are you seeing anyone?” are both considered “shit tests.” Vetting is akin to the interview process, and the definition of “shit test” directly states that interviews are one giant “shit test” to gauge employability, therefore one cannot vet without “shit testing” as defined.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/18 07:51 PM
26

Next. This conduct will only get worse with time. Cut your loses now.
/r/RedPillWomen18/11/18 06:58 PM
2

My husband may hang out with friends solo when I’m working on the weekend, traveling or have something going on like shopping with friends. They hangout at home or sometimes run errands together or go out for breakfast. He’s never gone out to a bar solo.
/r/RedPillWomen17/11/18 01:51 AM
18

Looks like he wants to come to you when it works best for him. Don’t go too over board with your new RPW knowledge. The newness is your account and this being your second post today indicates you may be a little over eager.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/18 05:12 PM
14

Unless he’s expressly vocalized that to you, I wouldn’t assume that’s true. One of the benefits of working from home is that your coworkers can’t bug you and it’s a great opportunity to really power through work. If that’s his goal, then unnecessary interruptions will not help him achieve it.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/18 05:02 PM
26

Make him breakfast, make him lunch, and then leave him alone. He is working. Don’t use that time to vacuum, clean his office or anything else that would disturb him. Treat it just like any day where he goes to the office and comes home for lunch.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/18 04:55 PM
5

The legal grey area of surrogacy is no way to avoid loss. As far as paternal rights go, his path is much clearer if his wife gives birth to their child. My favorite part is where he wants to enter into a surrogacy arrangement on a budget by going to Eastern Europe.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/18 12:54 AM
2

As a unit, are you in dire financial straights? Are the bills being paid? How is your retirement portfolio looking? How badly has this impacted your overall financial picture? If he isn’t already intimately involved with managing the finances, then I would get him up to speed on your financial status. Maybe seeing how is lack of motivation is destroying your future together will help him muster up enough motivation to restart his job search. I would also recommend he try therapy. You could benef…
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/18 06:42 PM
39

Wow - You sound like a miserable, lazy, self-centered person. You’re so judgmental of those around you, and act superior, but your description of your own life shows that you are no better off than your boyfriend, roommates or mother. At 21, you should be working on your education or gaining transferrable skills through an entry level position. I think a point that gets missed on this sub is that you need to be self supporting for most men to seriously consider you as wife material. You currentl…
/r/RedPillWomen14/11/18 12:22 PM
58

I would say that is enough to be a problem, but I know opinions will differ.
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 05:22 PM
20

In the Surrendered Wife, she recommends just letting things fall apart. If you come home one day and you no longer have electricity or internet or water, you’re just supposed to let your husband know somethings wrong and then STFU. Personally, I thought that was horrible advice because defaulting on your bills can absolutely destroy your credit and put you in a real financial bind. It could prevent you from ever renting again and certainly from buying a house or a car. It can ruin your personal …
/r/RedPillWomen08/11/18 12:52 PM
2

I live in a world whose court system is extremely biased against men. A system that will give the kids, the house, the pension, the alimony and the child support to the woman while the man goes to live in his car. What happens if the man loses his job? Too bad, so sad. He still needs to maintain the standard of living "to which she is accustomed". If a man loses his job, he should immediately file a motion to modify based on the substantial change in circumstances. Additionally, it is the standa…
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/18 05:43 PM
3

I would say the values OP defines as feminine are in line with the concept of charity. Whether or not one believes the government should enforce compulasary charity has nothing to do with femininity vs. masculinity or RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/18 08:54 PM
2

AM: - Cleanse - Toning Lotion - Moisturize - Serum w/ SPF - Primer w/ SPF - Makeup (powder foundation, blush, powder eyebrows, eye makeup, finishing powder, curl eyelashes and mascara) Hair: I wash my hair every 2-3 days. Each day I was it, I add product and blow it out. I use dry shampoo before bed and put it in a lose bun. I have long hair and try to wear it down as much as possible. I do sometimes wear a single French braid. PM: - Double cleanse - Toning Lotion - Depends on the day, as I have…
/r/RedPillWomen23/10/18 05:14 PM
9

It’s a reality for a lot of families, so I have a difficult time supporting someone who wants to judge and criticize working parents.
/r/RedPillWives19/10/18 04:29 PM
6

The vast majority of Americans are only one medical emergency away from bankruptcy. Few Americans have a safety net to fall back on. If you’re husband is fired for cause, then he may not have the right to file for unemployment and likely won’t have a severance package. COBRA alone will likely be over $1000 a month. A joint account can be completely emptied by one party. Even a great husband can fall victim to addiction or become bitter when a divorce is filed. Suicide, overdose and a variety of …
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 09:57 PM
7

Being a SAHM is risky, even with a perfect husband. Personally, I wouldn’t make the move to SAHM unless we had at least a year’s worth of expenses for the entire family, in liquid assets, put away under my name only. Why? Because my husband could lose his job, be seriously injured, die, commit suicide, be murdered, develop an addiction, have his identity stolen or file for divorce at any time, and you should always be prepared for the worst case scenario. Does that mean I don’t have a good husba…
/r/RedPillWives17/10/18 08:59 PM
2

I’m glad you are aware with the risk, particularly using combined funds to pay your mortgage, property taxes, and any maintanence or remolding fees associated with your home. It shouldn’t surprise you that if things go south you will likely end up with an unjust enrichment lawsuit filed against you. As you know, these types of claims gained steamed during the time when same sex couples couldn’t get married, but are now commonly being used when couples who are unmarried end their relationship. I’…
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/18 05:46 PM
26

Merging finances without being married is a huge risk, so good luck! I think the Surrendered Wife assumes that the partners are married, hence the use of the term wife. In the world of autopay and online banking, I don’t see any issue with creating a spreadsheet and formally handing over the information. He will also probably need to call and have his name placed on the account so he can talk to representatives about billing questions.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/18 03:30 PM
1

If everything else is the same? Nothing, but we will have years of attraction built up. My standards for my husband of 40 years are naturally different than what I was looking for in a guy in his late 20s. I wasn’t interested in a guy who was already balding in his late 20s.
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/18 02:25 AM
3

I don’t think that’s any different from a man having a preference for blondes or women with long, curly hair.
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 11:28 PM
1

Yes! I actually never felt like my “Musts” limited my ability to date.
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 07:47 PM
-4

Here is the list of realistic expectations I had when I was looking for a husband: Must be male Must be my age or older, with a preference for men 5 years older Must not be showing signs of hair loss, with a preference for thick, light color hair Must have received good dental and orthodontic care Must eat meat and animal products, and not be a picky eater Must be at least 6 inches taller than myself, so at at least 5’8 Must be interested in physical fitness, but not to the degree of being “ripp…
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 05:34 PM
11

Just open communication. I noticed he didn’t buy cards or gifts for other people in his family for holidays or birthdays, so I just asked if he wanted to get rid of the expectation of gift giving.
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/18 11:25 PM
21

Nothing. We don’t exchange gifts. My husband said it first, but I totally agree, that it is weird to surprise someone with something that was bought using their own money. Instead, we just buy things we want throughout the year. I know he loves our arrangement, because it takes all the pressure off of him to find gifts. He’s told me that receiving gifts makes him feel like there’s pressure on him to top it and he worries he won’t get just what I want. He feels this way even though I’ve made it c…
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/18 11:08 PM
3

You don’t get to “try” together, but for a fee you can technically choose the gender of your children if you go the lab route.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/18 03:10 AM
13

My husband was a SAHH for a brief stint, went back to work and is now working on transitioning back into being home full time. He loved being at home. He could schedule his days as he pleased, focus on his passion projects, and make sure the home was exactly how he wanted. I still pitched in quite a bit with cooking and doing some chores, but he covered the big things like shopping (I made the list), vacuuming, laundry, bathrooms, etc. I realize that not all men are into cleaning, but my husband…
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/18 03:08 AM
27

What RP stuff have you been reading? If you want to give it another shot, and are truly prepared to move and be with him, then just tell him. Otherwise you look like a weirdo who is just trying to play games.
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/18 09:08 PM
2

From my perspective, if they work together to solve the issue with the dog, then they will be on the path to a stronger relationship. Solving the puppy problem allows her to learn RPW principles and how to put them into practice. Part of accepting the RP is accepting the impact of your actions. They made the decision to get a dog, and now they need to accept responsibility for its impact on their lives and its actions and behavior. If she cannot accept that its her fault that the dog ate the cou…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 09:57 PM
1

So, it sounds like the solution to this issue is easy. Your BF should be taking her to work every day, so there is no need for her to be in the hallway. If he cannot take her to work, then you put her in the crate. Personally, now that we have a dog, we go to great lengths not to participate in activities where our dog cannot come along. In the extremely rare circumstance where that isn't possible, we hire a sitter. We treat our dog just like we would a kid. Why get one otherwise? When we have t…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 09:32 PM
1

Why not? For a spay to have maximum preventative benefit, it should be done before the dog's first heat. You need to either crate train the dog or train her to ensure that she can have full range of the apartment. Crate training is preferable, but unfortunately because you didn't start the process when you first introduced her into the space it will be more difficult. Clearly your BF can't take her to work all the time, so you need to find a daycare service ASAP. All dogs, but big dogs in partic…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 08:55 PM
1

Is your dog not spayed? Why are you leaving it in the hallway? This is exactly the type of situation that inspires descructive behavior. Dogs either like their cave space (crate) or not feeling limited. Why can’t you take your dog to a daycare facility? Have you contacted a trainer to work on these obedience issues? Do you own your home or are you renting? Honesty I’m more concerned about the treatment of your dog if you can’t tell. But, finding a solution that is safer for your dog will also so…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 07:30 PM
21

Your comments do not reflect my personal experience entering marriage. They also do not mesh with the comments I’ve heard from other men at the stage in their lives where they are making decisions about marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/18 11:09 PM
36

When men are trying to answer the question “Would I fuck her?” they are only look at one trait - attractiveness. When men are trying to answer the question “Would I marry her?” they look at a multitude of traits. Telling women to “ditch the resume” helps them learn how to get attraction, but it does not give them the full picture on how to gain marital level commitment from high value men. One of those traits may be level of education. Why a man is interested in that trait may vary. A man may co…
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/18 08:56 PM
19

Let’s flip this around. “Your money, your time and your reputation are yours until you enter into a LTR. The moment you enter into a LTR, you agree to hand over control to all of your money and finances, all of your time and your reputations. Women get to control those in any way possible, and men must just deal with it.” A deal is a deal, right?
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/18 08:26 PM
2

Only you will know if continuing down this path, which require you to take on more debt and continue to be miserable, will make you so miserable that no man will want you. A man wants a woman that’s a help, not a hindrance. And having a wife who is always miserable, depressive, worrying about money, and naggy is a huge hinderamce. Miserable human beings make miserable spouses and miserable parents. I would look into Dave Ramsey and start getting on a budget now, so as soon as you start making an…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 02:15 PM
3

How are you performing in your program? What is your program ranked? What are you performance benchmarks if you want to have your pick of specialties? Here are a couple of things to consider: If you “hate” medicinal school, and your performance is suffering, then you need to figure out how to transfer your credits ASAP. What was your undergrad in? Have you looked into transferring into a PA or DO program? What about podiatry it chiropractic? Are a clinic MPH, MHA, or epidemiology (degree type va…
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 11:46 AM
5

Do you do volunteer and charity work? You could mention that if people ask you what you to all day. And if you don’t, this is would be the perfect time to start. Even if you don’t plan on working again, it is important to keep up skills that are in demand in your areas job market. Will you be set for life if your husband dies or divorces you tomorrow? What would you do if he died or divorced you after kids? What about if he was severely injured and you had to support your entire family? Not to b…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/18 11:14 AM
1

All of these revelations can be made without male participation. The men seem to do fine with discussing female nature without any female participation.
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/18 06:19 PM
1

We are told that what men look for in a long term partner is very simple. It’s been previously stated in this forum that men want: fitness; youth; assertive sexuality; playfulness; conventional femininity; genuine desire to please him; submission; respect; nurturing (potential mothering qualities); a natural deference to male authority; humility; admiration; and an unobligated desire to recognize that man as her complementary partner. In addition to the criteria listed above, we are told that me…
/r/RedPillWomen08/09/18 05:53 PM
6

Commitment is the foundation of a relationship. Without commitment there is no “long term.” Sex does not a relationship make. As the gatekeepers of commitment, men are the foundation and the structure. Similar to the foundation and structure of the home. Without commitment and a solidly built structure a home would collapse. The same applies to a marriage or LTR. Once there is a solid foundation or structure, then a woman can supply her feminine energy, including sex, to fill and grow the relati…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/18 12:54 AM
4

It’s often said over at MRP and TRP that if a woman is attracted to you enough, she has no boundaries. She’ll do whatever you want sexually, and she’ll even share you with other women. Conversely, men have to enforce boundaries. Boundaries are based out of respect. If a woman respects her man she won’t cheat, she’ll keep up her appearance and be enthusiastic in the bedroom, and she’ll follow her man’s lead whenever it goes. Edit: also men being the keepers of commitment and women being the keepe…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/18 12:07 AM
30

You should not be that deeply attached to someone after a month. That’s a red flag in and of itself.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/18 11:05 PM
36

Nope. You’ve got damaged goods on your hands. End things. Maybe after a year when he’s healed and no longer in contact with his ex you two can reconnect, but I wouldn’t stop dating and vetting other men to wait around for him.
/r/RedPillWomen30/08/18 08:09 PM
3

My husband liked the “instant gratification” best: picking the menu, cake tasting, wedding dress/suit shopping, etc. The pieces where planning or designing were involved, he would give input at the beginning and then sign off on the final products. For example, he gave our graphic designer the image he had for our paper products at the beginning, but I’m the one who worked with them on the drafting and fine tuning process.
/r/RedPillWives30/08/18 02:52 PM
6

Yes, it is absolutely worth it. I get the financial part not being a big deal, but I understand that others may have a vastly different perspective. If you can pay for it in cash (which should actually be all on rewards cards FYI, we basically did our honeymoon alll in points!) then it’s worth it to throw a huge, fun party to get everyone together and thank them for everything they’ve done. I don’t regret a thing. Also the thought that all men hate weddings and think they are poor investments is…
/r/RedPillWives30/08/18 02:49 AM
4

en·ti·tle·ment the fact of having a right to something. the amount to which a person has a right. the belief that one is inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. I don’t think I have a right to a $4000+ engagement ring or that I inherently deserve one. My comment was made on my own personal experiences. Am I aware that $4000 or less engagement rings exist? Yes. Id a $4000 engagement ring expensive based on my personal experiences? No. But, I acknowledged my privileged position by…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/18 09:53 PM
3

During the week, my husband and I usually spend about 1.5 hours between cooking, eating and chores. I usually make simpler meals during the week (salads or a meat + a veggie) so there is not a lot of prep or clean up involved. If it is a more complicated meal (meatloaf, stuffed pork, casserole, etc.) then we typically won't do any chores that night, knowing that we will eat leftover the next day and have more time. Each day, we make sure the kitchen is clean (dishes, wiped counters) and that any…
/r/RedPillWives26/08/18 04:41 PM
7

I think a lot of issues arise when a couple forgets that only a tiny portion of a wedding is meant to be focused on the couple and celebrating their marriage. The biggest part of the wedding, the reception, is supposed to serve as a thank you to all of their guests for supporting the couple, making the marriage possible and traveling to serve as witnesses to their vows. Whenever we made a decision about the wedding, our focus was on our guests. Will our guests like this menu? What about Aunt Ste…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/18 04:11 PM
4

A sense of entitlement would be refusing to accept an engagement ring because it was priced lower than $4000. I would have married my husband without any ring if that was what he determined his budget was. I wear a ring that I helped pick out, but my husband set the budget and the standards the ring needed to meet. Was I supposed to say no thanks? From personal experience, I do not know too many women with engagement rings valued at or less than $4000. Generally, it seems men in my area follow t…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/18 04:00 PM
1

My husband had this conversation privately with our son. I can't image he would have told his girlfriend about it. Wife. You meant to say “I can’t image [sic] he would have told his [wife] about it.” Talk about a lack of respect for the relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/18 03:01 AM
18

Schedule meetings with a couple of family law attorneys in your area. This is separate property, and it can be protected. This notion that pre-nuptial agreements are constantly being “thrown out” by the courts is misleading. A good one will have a severabilty clause, which means that even if portions of the agreement not upheld, then the remainder can be enforced. Also, the vast majority of the legal benefits can be obtained through wills and power of attorney documents. You don’t need to get ma…
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 09:37 PM
4

We had to book the vendors and venue 20ish months out. Depending on where you live, and how competitive the market is 2+ year our bookings are common. I know several couples who secretly booked venues and photographers before they were engaged.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 08:27 PM
6

You’ve never heard of someone being engaged for 1.5 or 2 years? That’s pretty standard for my friend group, unless the couple was together 3+ engagement.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 08:07 PM
6

The marital bond forms during the engagement period. Her son had already made his decision. If he wanted to call of the wedding he could have done it without his parents interfence.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 07:07 PM
7

Her son is married. A strong marital bond in his best interest. Her actions work to destroy that connection between husband and wife. OP was not objective. Her emotions and thoughts were clouded by commitment to her son. Once a man is married, his mother needs to respect the fact that the wife is #1.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 06:25 PM
6

While there is nothing wrong with strong familial bonds, many parents (including OP in my opinion) often cross the line and try to meddle and control their children after marriage. When you get married, that relationship is #1. It trumps mom, it trumps dad, it trumps sibling, it trumps friends, etc. You pick your spouse. They need your full support and dedication. You need to have their back, and keep meddling family and friends out of the conversation. That's what "leaving and cleaving" is. It …
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 06:23 PM
6

Two good quote from the study, which can by found at THIS LINK: We now discuss the possible mechanisms that may explain the positive associations that we nd between marital dissolution and spending on the engagement ring and wedding. Noncausal mechanisms could underlie these results. For example, the types of couples who tend to spend little on their wedding may be the types of cou- ples who are a better match for each other and therefore less likely to divorce. If wedding expenditures are indee…
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 06:17 PM
4

This study is relatively lean on analysis. I’m also not a fan of how they selected their sample size and demographic representation. It looks like debt and financial stress due to wedding related expenditures correlates to continued financial related stress in the marriage. Which, in turn, leads to divisiveness and ultimately divorce. I don’t think the take away from the study is that you should spend $1000 or less on your wedding. I think the takeaway is that a couple should spend within their …
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 03:31 PM
6

Can you provide a citation or link to the study?
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 11:53 AM
2

I suppose since the OP is in the context of marriage and young couples, that I assumed your post was direct towards the same group.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 11:52 AM
10

Moving out of the childhood home, and in many cases moving away from hometowns or out of state, are all part of the “leaving and cleaving” process. While it’s rooted in the Christian belief that man shall forsake all others upon marriage, the concept of “leaving and cleaving” applies to all marriages, even secular ones. Here’s the best description I’ve found: If either spouse fails to both leave and cleave, problems will result in a marriage. If spouses refuse to truly leave their parents, confl…
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 05:01 AM
33

Interesting perspective. My husband and I picked out rings together as a team. It’s was extremely important to him that I was happy with the ring and it was something I would want to wear every day. The jewelry store we bought it from actually won’t sell “surprise” engagement rings without the purchaser signing a waiver, so clearly the differing opinions on settings are common enough to warrant that practice. How involved was your son in the wedding planning? My husband and I made every single d…
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/18 04:55 AM
15

If I had to bet, I would bet that they had sex and he isn’t admitting it.
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/18 07:01 PM
24

Having a female roommate would be a straight up deal breaker for me. Cheating is for me as well. Especially because he will continue to live with this woman for the foreseeable future. My advice is to end things with him, and move on. At 10 months my SO and I already lived together and an engagement ring had been purchased. If he was serious about your relationship, he would show it in ways other than cheating with you.
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/18 06:35 PM
10

Disclaimer: Was unable to watch the video prior to commenting The girlfriend solution could work for somethings, but not all. It can work for issues you’re having with family or friends or at work, but you cannot discuss matters related to your husband with a friend. Relationship matters should only be between a husband and wife and never expressed or revealed to someone outside the marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/18 02:46 PM
2

Like any generalization, it [may be] generally true with regards to the general population. However, it won't hold true with regards to every last individual and it certainly won't be to the same degree with regards to each person and each conversation. I would recommend adding this as a disclaimer to all of your posts. Additionally, what's described here will hold more true with regards to real conversation and less so with regards to frivolous chit chat. It will hold more true with regards to …
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/18 01:50 PM
11

Interesting take on female vs. male communication styles, but not something I’ve personally experienced. My husband and I can talk for hours. We road trip a lot and always laugh when we get to our destination, because 4 hours can seem like 4 minutes when you’re chatting and enjoying each other’s company. I think your suggestions are a little extreme. They require complete compromise on behalf of the woman. An additional, less extreme suggestion, may simply be to warn your husband when you need t…
/r/RedPillWomen22/08/18 11:35 AM
3

Intimate involvement is not limited to penetrative sex.
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/18 10:27 PM
1

I have full access to all of my husband’s devices and he has the same for me. If I wouldn’t want him reading something, then I wouldn’t write it. If I could not trust him to come to me for context of my statements and listen to me share stories behind different messages, then I would not be with him.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/18 05:16 PM
7

For me, this would be deal breaking behavior. One of the reasons I felt so comfortable when I started dating my husband was because it was so clear that he had no contact with any of his ex girlfriend or flings. Men and women cannot be just friends if they have been intimently involved. There will always be the existence of sexual tension. The only avenue for men and women to be friends is if the relationship is always strictly platonic. (Yes, I’m aware that some commenters believe it is never p…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/18 05:08 PM
9

Maybe it’s not included in your criteria, but it’s very clear from the comments on this thread that some high value men place importance on education and earning potential. Maybe it’s because it lessens the risk of alimony or because they don’t want to pass on a low IQ to children, but it’s certainly not an absurd requirement.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/18 06:01 PM
8

You presume that there is no cross over. A women can be in her early to mid 20’s, attractive, submissive, great in bed, and amazing in the kitchen all while being highly educated with the potential to make six figures. And that is a considerable number of women in the top 1%. I have friends who are little trust fund babies and never ended up graduating for college, but the majority of them are still in their party girl phase in their mid-late 20s. In my circle, the women who went to college (mos…
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/18 05:20 PM
7

I agree that it is not that difficult. I have a 15-20 minute commute home from work and that’s enough time to switch my mindset. My husband is no different. We work in the same competitive/aggressive/stressful profession and it takes him a little time each evening to unwind and relax. We’ve just learned to vocalize if we’ve had a particularly crappy day and ask for more time to process our thoughts solo. I’m guessing that some RPW commenters were less than impressed with this post, because it co…
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:37 PM
10

The definition of the Manish Alpha Stereotype needs to be flushed out more. Right now it seems to encompass all sorts of items, such as: has a post-graduate degree, works in a male dominated profession, competes and strives for success in her career, does not defer to men as a whole (particularly in the work place), assertiveness or argumentative, exercises her right to vote in elections, has a high salary, etc. The post seems to completely ignore the fact that women can have advanced degrees an…
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 05:44 PM
1

Personally, in your situation, I would plan to take at least 2 gap years. That’ll put you at 24/25 when you enter grad school. If you’re already dating someone at graduation, then you can get married and make a joint decision about grad school. If you haven’t met anyone, then grad school will expose you to a new dating pool. Gaining practical experience will also make you more competitive to schools’ scholarship programs. Depending on your demographics, you may not qualify for meaningful scholar…
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 12:34 AM
5

Are you going into a field where graduate school is a requirement like law, medicine or academics? Do people in your field typically take a gap period in between degrees to gain relevant experience? Are you currently at a school that would allow you to gain access to a top right graduate school? I work in a field that requires a high level of education. Either you get a graduate degree, or there are no jobs available. I had $0 in student debt when I graduated. Why? Because I got great grades, wa…
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/18 08:27 PM
1

So, technically, other women should bow when the meet me. Cool.
/r/RedPillWomen07/08/18 05:44 PM
11

This is his go to criticism. I always lol, because when you have to ask multiple people the same question, it’s a good clue the writing style is to blame.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 01:47 PM
1

I was simply combatting the notion that high value men won’t commit to women who allow even a drop of alcohol to pass through their lips. There’s a big difference between having a glass of wine at a country club fundraising event and drinking two bottles of wine at lunch every day. But this post doesn’t distinguish that. It makes it seem like the only path to a high value partner is becoming a teetotaler, which isn’t the case. I also take issue with the sentiment that because my husband drinks o…
/r/RedPillWomen19/07/18 05:17 PM
25

Do. Not. Date. Seriously, you need Nun Mode. You do not need to be interacting with men. You cannot be a good partner, and love someone else until you love yourself. You have a long road of personal growth ahead. Have you checked into free counseling services through your university yet? Made a new friend? Tried picking up a hobby?
/r/RedPillWomen17/07/18 01:11 AM
3

Consuming alcohol =/= Being intoxicated. What is your definition of "drinks all the time?" If I have 1 drink per week, that means I drink alcohol fairly regularly. But, it does not mean that I am intoxicated regularly. If I wanted to, I could have 6 drinks over the course of an evening (2 pre-dinner, 2 during dinner, 2 after) without appearing intoxicated, assuming the timeline was like 6 p.m. - Midnight. As someone who is with a high value man, I don't think you comment really takes into accoun…
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/18 06:34 PM
13

First, I would make it a goal to get down to the 150 range. That’s within a healthy BMI. Then I would do a body scan and see where you are body fat wise, and make adjustments as necessary. After that, the work you will need to do depends on improving health by making sure your body fat is appropriately dispersed and at a healthy level. It will also depend on what aesthetic you are going for. I am at the top of the BMI range, because I am quite curvy. If you take away the 10 lbs I have for my cur…
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/18 01:59 PM
3

I think that’s pretty spot on. I have maybe 1 alcoholic beverage a week. I enjoy that 1 drink, but typically I don’t want any more than that. If for some reason I was told I could never drink alcohol again, because it interacted negatively with a medication or something I really wouldn’t care. Also, people who act superior because they don’t drink make me lol. Mostly because they usually cite health reasons, but still consume other carbohydrates. The less than 5 carbs a week I consume via alcoho…
/r/RedPillWomen16/07/18 11:34 AM
29

Is there more to the story? My husband like a clean home, but isn’t particularly bothered by clutter here and there, so I am having difficulty understanding what led your fiancé to issue this ultimatum. I would not recommend leaving your job prior to marriage. If your fiancé wants you to leave your job, then he needs to go with you and sign a marriage license tomorrow. What will you do for health insurance? What if he passes away unexpectedly? Is his will set up with you as his sole beneficiary?…
/r/RedPillWives15/07/18 08:00 PM
8

If things are going well, I would not recommend. What provoked this idea?
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 05:33 PM
4

So, just to clarify: He said he wanted to go on vacation. He said where he wanted to go. He did not help plan. He did not give any additional assistance. You suggest that he invests "so much" time and energy, but to be it looks like he is only doing low time investment items. Calling and texting is low effort, particularly in an LDR. Visiting is where the effort is. My husband and I were not in a LDR, and he texted every day and called every day we didn't see each other. I can count on 1 had the…
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 05:31 PM
-2

Lolz. My comment wasn’t so harsh OP deleted her thread.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 04:30 PM
6

Your university probably offers free counseling services. I would look into it.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 04:29 PM
4

I would suggest therapy (CBT) to help you learn coping skills and mechanisms. Get on medication I know that’s “not always the answer,” but for depression it is. At least in the beginning. You need to get yourself right first. You’re just fixating in this Guy, because it can his fault or hypergamys fault and you can ignore the depression issue.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 04:07 PM
3

Get a life. You mention being lonely multiple times. Why are you so lonely? Why don’t you have friends and hobbies and an active social calendar. You should be so busy that you don’t have time to think about this guy. The only thing that was special about him is that he gave you attention when you were lonely. That doesn’t sound very special or unique to me. Stop being lame and be the best version of yourself. Give yourself permission to move on with your life.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 03:44 PM
8

There are a lot of issues to break down here. You are in a new LDR? Why? LDR are a terrible idea. If you can’t find men in your area, consider moving. It’s one thing if an established relationship has an LDR phase, but I will never recommend or defend new LDRs. You are dating while struggling to manage your depression. Work on yourself. Get into CBT. Work on implementing coping skills and meditation. Exercise daily. Get on a keto or Paleo diet. Find a medication that works. Most importantly, sto…
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/18 03:33 PM
5

My most honest suggestion? Don’t take a job with a dress code, that you were aware of at the time of hiring, if that dress code makes you uncomfortable. Were you unaware of the nature of the bartending business? If you insist on pushing against the dress code, then maybe you can ask to wear a t shirt under the tank top or see if you can pay to have the logo put on a T-shirt. Though with nice hair and makeup, I don’t see anything inherently unfeminine about the current dress code.
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/18 07:07 PM
32

The RPW dress code is comprised of skirts with a blouse or dresses. Why? If your overweight focus on losing weight before revamping your wardrobe. While there there are clothing techniques that look better than others for the overweight person, at the end of the day there's no way to hide that your overweight. It is much easier to look better and find clothes that fit you well if you are not overweight. When someone decides to lose weight, they need to decide to do it for themselves. Otherwise, …
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/18 11:39 PM
3

Having realistic expectations, does not necessarily equate to “settling.” I also don’t think that realistic expectations are limited to items like: he has a kind heart, he values life long learning, he wants to be a father. Here is the list of realistic expectations I had when I was looking for a husband: Must be male Must be my age or older, with a preference for men 5 years older Must not be showing signs of hair loss, with a preference for thick, light color hair Must have received good denta…
/r/RedPillWomen10/07/18 03:53 PM
6

I read your post before I down voted it, and again when I articulated why I down voted you. I see that it is a pattern for you to accuse other commenters who do not share your point of view of not reading your content. When it gets to the point where you are making that accusation multiple times in one thread, the common theme is still the unclear nature your original comment. This is a slippery slope argument. Stating that if men do not feel comfortable making lewd comments, or what you label "…
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/18 04:09 PM
1

My downvote signifies the fact that I don’t shit where I eat. When I go to work every day, I am there to work hard. That’s it. I am not there to flirt, make friends, or really be social in any fashion. I’m there to get results and cross things off my project list. The notion that part of my job is to entertain advances from men while I’m trying to work, is absurd. If I’m at work, I don’t care what a guy’s SMV is, I am not interested in any interactions that are not 100% work related.
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/18 12:06 PM
1

Sounds like you jump to sex way too fast. How often are you seeing these men in the first 2 weeks? In the initial getting to know you phase, I didn’t see my husband more than once, maybe twice, a week. I was very clear with my husband when we were dating that I didn’t have sex before monogamy. He didn’t need to provide me with a commitment forever, but he did need to commit to being monogamous. We had sex for the first time after about a month of dating. Another thing to keep in mind, is that I …
/r/RedPillWomen07/07/18 03:13 PM
5

I think you’ve read my response wrong. On OP’s terms, if her BF makes a suggestion (hey let’s go get Mexican) and OP really, really wants to get Chinese, she can’t say anything. She has to say yes to the suggestion and get Mexican. Is that the end of the world? No, but at least in our family we like to make decisions like this together. For my husband at least, that got annoying fast. For him, a suggestion is just that, a suggestion and he wants to know my input and opinion. After a week and a h…
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/18 05:34 PM
20

I have tried doing this before, and only lasted about a week and a half. My husband figured out that I was chiming in and giving my opionion less, and it bugged him to no end. For me, being open and receptive to ideas and taking the time to consider each one was more helpful than just saying yes. If I want Chinese for supper, my husband wants to know. He has told me that many of his suggestions are guesses at what would make me happy (because I’m well behaved and deserve it :P), but he would pre…
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/18 05:08 PM
10

I am 100% confident that if I did something similar to what your fiancé did (left a car unlocked and it was stolen or didn’t set our security systems and cameras and the house was broken into) that my husband would file for divorce the next day (or the same day if there was enough time haha).
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/18 01:13 PM
2

I would recommend the book 30 Days to a Clean and Organized Home by Katie Berry.
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/18 06:55 PM
6

What is everyone’s daily cleaning checklist? We always aim to be 15 minutes away from being company ready on the main and basement levels. Upstairs where the bedrooms are is a different story, but we can generally have all of the guests rooms ready in an hour. Every day we do the following: - Dishes (no dirties in the sink, but we only make enough dishes to run the dishwasher twice a week) - Wipe down kitchen counters - Put away clutter - All clothes put away - Clean and tidy bathrooms
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/18 03:43 PM
3

I would think about the answers to the following questions: How does this impact our health care/insurance situation? Without insurance, many families are only one accident or injury away from bankruptcy. How does this impact my retirement savings or pension plan? If I continue to work for the time being, does that mean we could both retire sooner? What happens if I need to go back to work later? Am I destroying my future earning potential? What happens if we lose everything tomorrow in a fire? …
/r/RedPillWomen05/07/18 01:55 PM
5

She clearly states this is her first dating anniversary with her BF, not her husband. While I wouldn’t recommend nagging about anniversary celebrations, it is important to navigate that first anniversary and see if each persons approach matches up. If two people can’t navagate holidays, birthdays and anniversaries the same way, then that might be a signal they should evaluate their compatibility.
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 04:11 PM
4

I met my husband in our professional graduate program. Programs like MPA, MBA or EMBA, law school, MHA, MPH, PA school, Dentistry School, ARNP school, etc. are often filled with eligible men.
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 03:47 PM
1

I’ve found it incredibly freeing to have no expectations for anniversaries, birthdays and holidays. It’s wonderful because I’m never disappointed. For example, I like getting flowers for certain important dates, so instead of nagging my husband I make sure I go out and buy my own. If my husband independently gets me flowers, great that’s amazing, but if not I still got what I wanted and I’m happy. If you have both vocalized that you want to do something for your anniversary, then you should be p…
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 03:44 PM
3

My husband actually just “retired” (we participate in the FIRE community) and is a full time SAHH. He is enjoying many of the things you mentioned above: freedom to schedule his day how he sees fit, making sure the house looks like he wants it, taking time to reflect on the career he left behind and what he wants to do next, and tinkering with his personal projects and hobbies. He never plans to re-enter the workforce outside of starting his own consulting firm, which at the moment seems unlikel…
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/18 03:51 PM
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