As a single guy, I'm really not interested in pursuing someone who wants to be a SAHM. Are there any other single guys that feel the same?

SHITLORDHERE · 2014-02-26T19:22:28+00:00

I lead a simple life: No pets, no kids, no wife. I love women and have girlfriends but why fuck up a good thing?

thisisnotatoaster · 2014-02-26T20:07:19+00:00

My wife's one and only stipulation on the birth of the Kids was that she would not give up her job to look after kids or even go part time. She is a systems architect and if you take any time off your career is just about dead.

I was a partner in a firm of accountants and earned more than her, but I did all of the looking after of the Kids. We had child minders and nurseries but I believe you need one partner to take primary responsibility. My job was flexible.

My marriage would not have survived if she had given up her career! I would suggest in this day and age society is set up for two wage earners in a marriage.

Sasha_ · 2014-02-26T19:13:32+00:00

There's not much you can do about it, even if you were to marry a woman who said she wanted to have a career, there's nothing you can do if she changes her mind. Just avoid marriage altogether.

whatainttaken · 2014-02-26T19:27:50+00:00

Being a SAHM isn't an option for most people anymore. Especially once the kids are in school full time.

Find a woman with an education and a career she is passionate about. I couldn't imagine quitting my job. I worked too hard to get where I am at and I love what I do. There is no way I would give that up to be a full time caretaker. I would probably lose my mind!

I don't know that daycare necessarily leads to better socialization. I know when it is time for us to have kids daycare is something I will stress about because there are a lot of bad ones out there and I have had colleagues have really awful experiences. The cost is also insane unless you make a good income. For some people the cost benefit analysis works so that it makes more sense for one person to stay home until preschool or elementary school.

Both parents should have life insurance in case something happens to them.

Once anyone leaves the workforce for a period of time it impacts their earning capability long term. That is something that I think most people are well aware of.

You are spot on with the alimony.

bsutansalt · 2014-02-26T20:23:38+00:00

I feel the same way as well. A lot of people will react negatively to it because a lot of women secretly don't want to work. Water is wet, the sky is blue.

MattNextus · 2014-02-27T06:35:11+00:00

I agree, mostly because I'd like to be a SAHD. I recently moved out on my own and have found myself enjoying being domestic much more than I enjoy working.

Each person has their preferences, and each couple works out their own deal. Stand your ground, son, there are plenty of women out there who don't want to be a SAHM.

Mad_hatter0 · 2014-02-27T19:36:44+00:00

You can pick whoever you want to pick to marry dude. I'd make sure you tried to factor it into a pre-nup though.

I would never want a stay at home, who wants that level of boring in their lives?

rightsbot · 2014-02-26T18:04:16+00:00

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jojotmagnifficent · 2014-02-27T08:59:10+00:00

Plenty, unless you make a pretty sweet income it's too fuckin expensive to have to pay for two people let alone a child as well.

Sourdeez2014 · 2014-02-27T11:02:40+00:00

Im lucky, both my girlfriend nad I have jobs, we never want to marry and we never want to have kids.

cxj · 2014-02-27T20:58:23+00:00

Not telling you how to live, but Imo a sahm would be ideal. Unfortunately, it's probably not economically viable, and it's unbelievably risky for the man since you get absolutely fucked in divorce, although that happens either way I guess. Do you really encounter that many women that want to be sahm s? If so, do you mind me asking where you live?

plasmatorture · 2014-02-26T23:48:54+00:00

I'm with you there, given my low expected income with my career choice (classical music lol) I don't plan on having to support anyone but myself.

I'm not opposed to dating someone with more potential income than me and my job facilitates being a stay at home dad fairly well, so I'm happy to enter that kind of relationship and think I would be quite good at it. But I sure don't count on that ever happening.

2014-02-27T05:07:07+00:00

For many couples it makes sense for one person to stay at home during the pre-school ages, because it's less expensive than paying for childcare during the baby-to-kindergarten ages.

Tusse · 2014-02-26T21:41:20+00:00

I guess this is a point where you and the feminists agree that women should work and use daycare instead of DIY mothering.

Kids don't do as well in daycare as they do with a well-educated SAHM, and have more behavioural problems and delayed development.

If both parents work, usually it ends up being a serious slog (even if your kids go to day care) and you get at least 18 years of that.

Alimony usually is charged on a sliding scale depending on your earnings, and tends to be as much as they can get from you.

Staying child-free and single is probably the safest and least stressful option here, but if you're hoping for fatherhood, how about becoming a SAHD?

2014-02-27T16:47:01+00:00

You really think a daycare is a better environment for your child then a 24/7 caretaker that loves it?

Title	As a single guy, I'm really not interested in pursuing someone who wants to be a SAHM. Are there any other single guys that feel the same?
Author	brettdavis4
Upvotes	26
Comments	30
Date	February 26, 2014 6:02 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1z09wp/as_a_single_guy_im_really_not_interested_in/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/as-a-single-guy-im-really-not-interested-in.1003368 https://theredarchive.com/post/1003368

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