Feminist blogger about the social constraints men face

2012-06-23T15:28:26+00:00

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Falkner09 · 2012-06-23T07:32:39+00:00

I love cats. I always have, since I was a kid. I grew up on a farm, so tehy were everywhere. It always seemed natural to me to like cats, they're great pets and lots of fun. but everytime I tell someone I like cats, they always ask me why, as if there's something abnormal about me. It's kind of weird.

GeorgeLiqour · 2012-06-23T14:32:05+00:00

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HughManatee · 2012-06-23T15:48:40+00:00

50 years of feminism, and they are ONLY JUST realising that women enforce gender roles on men. Seriously.

frasoftw · 2012-06-23T21:48:16+00:00

Did anyone else think both the article and the video were not exactly helpful to men's rights?

What happens to our guys when we place them into these boxes of what they should be and what they can’t be? Do these norms determine how women are ultimately treated? Instead of only focusing on the victimization of girls, we need to right the norms and systems by focusing on what our boys need for healthy socialization and development.

Men's issues are only important when fixing them can help women out in some how? The video says the same thing at about 10:10...

Lucaribro · 2012-06-23T06:36:02+00:00

I have 2 cats. Doesn't affect my dating life at all.

Then again, I mostly go for casual sex on okcupid (for the moment). After I put in my profile that I make over $150k a year (I don't, I'm actually unemployed) I've gotten so many messages in my inbox that I have to empty them out almost monthly.

Tl;dr. Having cats don't mean shit, yo.

Lecks · 2012-06-23T14:35:09+00:00

Men can't own cats? Nobody tell Reddit!

... oh. Too late.

mrjing0 · 2012-06-23T21:22:01+00:00

i can very much relate to this. i am a fairly large, bearded, pierced, long haired male. most people who meat me would say i give the impression of a 'thug'. even my own mother at times.

i also keep pet rabbits (amongst other things). i have two. they live in the house, and are generally as much a part of my family as a cat or dog would be. ican't count the number of times i have had people ask 'any pets?' (obviously assuming some kind of large dog) who just look at me like i've said 'i keep children locked in cages in my basement' when i respond with 'rabbits'.

justsomeguyudontknow · 2012-06-24T03:52:32+00:00

Then my mind spiraled..I thought of all the things activities I can do without being judged too heavily by those of each sex.

We've get a live one boys! They're starting to wake up! It's like the scene in the Matrix where Neo wakes up in the tub of goo.

Is Tristin tough? What does he need to be tough for? Tough so he can protect me? From what? Tough so that he never wants to talk about anything? Tough so that as a woman I can never really relate to anything he’s thinking? Tough that as a woman I want to be the person that can get to him like no one else can? Get real, (some of you) women. If we don’t expect to be held to impossible body standards, we can’t possibly hold men to these standards of masculinity.

This is huge and I applaud her for saying it. Aside from the way people are socialized to think about gender, I think there's a very damning explanation as to why women hold men to these standards. It's because it would force them to cede some territory in what is thought of as traditionally feminine modes of being. "You can't be vulnerable - I'm supposed to be the vulnerable one!" I suppose feminism may have been good for getting people to think outside the constraints put on their sex. Where it failed was looking at it as a one way street, and I hope that the acknowledgement we see here will signal the death knell of that school of thought.

SongTamRiver · 2012-06-23T18:09:57+00:00

Yeah. I sure am glad theres a feminist out there fighting for my 'right' to do exactly what they say i should do. Freedom to become more feminine. Yay.

How about letting men define themselves? How about criticising sexist women?

Nah, we should all fight for the right to not be judged for owning a cat....

This is utter stupidity.

2012-06-23T14:46:51+00:00

Thankfully I had a father much like hers that taught me a wide range of things from wilderness skills, fighting, and home repair to cooking and jewelry-making. He is a Vietnam vet who had as many as 5 cats when I was growing up. He taught me that it is not what you do that makes you a man, but what you are. He taught me to be emotionally strong, observant, multitalented, self-sufficient, and most of all a survivor. I expect the same from everyone.

2012-06-24T01:05:51+00:00

If we don’t expect to be held to impossible body standards, we can’t possibly hold men to these standards of masculinity.

Hit the nail on the head with this one.

2012-06-23T22:38:09+00:00

I think women don't actually care about things like Cats. Listening to what women say they want is not really a good idea.

Title	Feminist blogger about the social constraints men face
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	63
Comments	55
Date	June 23, 2012 5:12 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/vh0dz/feminist_blogger_about_the_social_constraints_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/feminist-blogger-about-the-social-constraints-men.1019241 https://theredarchive.com/post/1019241

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